Children of the Wild Ones
Chapter Three
The next morning Dean woke up to find Castiel gazing at him with a serene expression on his face, his body relaxed into the mattress. It was funny because Dean had stared at him-sometimes to the point of making others uncomfortable-more times than he could count but he wasn’t sure if he’d ever really looked at Cas before. He kinda had this stupid idea that if he paid too much attention his eyeballs would explode out of his head from all the awesome. Seemed he didn’t have to worry about that now though.
Castiel’s eyes were like, super blue and even though he was an angel of the Lord there were times when his emotions bled through just like a human’s would. That was probably why he started trusting him so quickly. Not like his people skills really helped with any of that. But even before Castiel admitted to having doubts Dean started to get the feeling he was different, that there was more to him than the stone faced demeanor he usually appeared with. It had been such a small thing really; a hand on his shoulder in a moment when Dean really needed it.
And now they were in bed together.
Smirking, he rolled onto his back and stretched his arms above his head. The urge to leap across the room was there but he kind of felt it would be dumb to act on. What would be the point anyway? Besides he was warm and comfortable; why ruin it by over thinking what could be very simple? Why look for drama when there wasn’t any?
Okay he must have something inside of him-and not the good whiskey-because he’d never been this chill before in this life. It was a feeling he could get used to however.
Yawning, he glanced to his watch and decided to just laze for a bit longer. It was a luxury he didn’t usually allow himself because there was always something to do. Some monster to kill or some case to research. And yeah they needed to find out what was up with his new mojo but it wasn’t like he was burning down orphanages when he sneezed or whatever. In fact he couldn’t seem to do much of anything without focusing, and even then sometimes it didn’t work.
Maybe that’s a sign I should stop.
Or try harder.
“Good morning, Dean.” Castiel’s voice was rough as sandpaper as usual but with a lilt of warmth. “Did you sleep well?”
He nodded and dug the sleep out of his eyes. “I did, yeah. Did you watch me all night?”
Castiel gave a little half smile. “No. Only for the last three hours.”
It was creepy but also sorta sweet. “Heh okay. Though I don’t know what you get out of it.”
Castiel rubbed at the material of the rumpled pillowcase. “I used to do it so that I could remove your Hell nightmares and make sure you were safe. Now? Well I suppose I just like the look of you.”
Hell. He didn’t dream about it too often anymore but every once and a while he’d wake up in a cold sweat with the feeling of entails soaking his hands. He’d never get over what he did down there or how hollow it had left him, but knowing the whole thing was some big angel plan helped a tiny bit. If Sam knew he’d want Dean to share and cry it out but that wasn’t his style, not after the first time anyway. It was easier to just be okay and deal-drown it out with alcohol when he had to.
He’d known deep down though that there should have been more dreams but it made sense Castiel kept some of them at bay.
He shrugged, going for nonchalant. “I don’t dream about it that much anymore. Guess I’m over it.”
Castiel gazed at him. “I hardly doubt that nor do I expect you to be…over it. The healing process takes time.”
Dean frowned. Sometimes he really hated how the angel just knew him, man. From that first damn moment in that fucken barn when he’d stripped his bravado bare he’d just never stopped. “Whatever.” The handprint seared into his shoulder twitched and he scratched at it, idly tracing the raised flesh. “Point is I’m fine. Let’s just leave it at that.”
His friend sighed but didn’t push the issue. “Alright.” There was a soft rustling noise and then a heavy wing was hitting him in the face.
Okay, the wing thing. Dean didn’t consider himself to be a creeper or the sort of person who liked fetishes. Honestly he wasn’t sure if his love of Busty Asian Beauties counted as a fetish because he loved busty beauties in general. And some non-busty beauties. Just beauties, really. But it was different with wings for some reason. It wasn’t like he checked out birds or whatever but from the moment he’d seen the shadow of Cas’ wings he’d thought about them off and on. Wondered what they really looked like or felt like. Now that he could see them and touch them without blood leaking out of his ears, he knew he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from doing so.
Which could get strange very quickly except Castiel was apparently okay with it. He should probably find out why.
“So…” He began even as his fingers inched towards the feathers. “Is this something I’m gonna have to watch you for now? You gonna be flashing me like some pervert?”
“I was under the impression you enjoyed being close to my wings.” Castiel said dryly.
“Heh well…” Dean had a feeling he was going to regret teaching him sarcasm. “I meant is this something you’d been wanting to do but couldn’t because it would hurt me.”
“Perhaps.” Castiel replied glibly. “I admit it is nice to be able to share them with you. With all of the other angels either indifferent to me or hunting me, I’ve missed certain rituals that we used to take part in. Mainly grooming.”
Dean swallowed thickly as traces of guilt crawled up the walls of his throat. When he’d demanded that Castiel think for himself and do the right thing he hadn’t exactly thought about what consequences the angel would face afterwards. Now he felt like a piece of shit for talking him into leaving his home and his family, especially what with him losing his powers and stuff.
A memory of Castiel sucking down prescription pills and lamenting his old better life flashed before his eyes and he cursed to himself. How could he have been so selfish?
“I’m sorry.” Dean found that he wanted to avoid Castiel’s gaze but couldn’t…which was usually the case. “I-I never should have asked you to rebel. I was just desperate to get to Sammy and stop Lucifer.”
“It was the right thing to do.” The angel whispered. “I am not angry with you, Dean. I always knew unleashing Hell on Earth was wrong but I convinced myself that I was following my Father’s orders. I wanted them to be His orders so badly because like others I had stopped feeling his presence. I do not regret my decision-my first true act of free will.”
“But you miss your home and your family. They’re dicks but I get it.” Pause. “As corny as it sounds there is no place like home.”
“Yes. My brothers and sisters remain dear to me even now, and my greatest hope is to see them again and be embraced by them.” He looked up at the ceiling and beyond. “But I think down here with you and Sam that I am truly doing God’s work. He loved all of you so much; he would want me to save you.”
“What about your wing crap?”
“The grooming? I had thought you could help me. If you wish.”
“If you want-I mean sure. What do I gotta do?”
“Simply help keep my feathers in order and clean. Tend to any wounds they may suffer in the future.”
Dean could do that, he could totally do that. It was such a small thing really for the nerdy little dude that had saved his life time and time again. And yeah okay he wanted to do it anyway, and it was the perfect excuse to get his fondle on without being overly dramatic about it. “I’m gonna figure out how to whip mine out so this isn’t all one-sided.”
Castiel seemed please with that idea. “I am curious as to what they look like.”
So was Dean. “Hey Cas, I know you said Jimmy was a vessel and whatnot, and that he’s probably gone now since you have been blown up since then so…is this you now?”
The wing covering much of Dean’s upper body flapped once. “This body is now a part of me, yes. When I was at full power I could shed it like a snake sheds its skin. I suppose if I tried to do that now it would leave the vessel with the appearance of being brain dead.” He explained. “If you are inquiring as to the appearance of my true form; I am a wavelength of celestial intent. Able to be everywhere and nowhere all at once. I span across all of space and time neither flesh nor bone but the very air itself. Like the universes beyond the one you know I am infinite.”
Picturing such a thing was impossible but it sounded epic. And terrifying. “Guess I look like an ant to you or something huh?”
Castiel reached over and pressed two fingers to Dean’s pulse point. “To me you are paper thin and breakable. So flawed and fragile, suffering from many vices and surrounded by many ailments that can easily destroy you. Not unlike an ant actually. And yet you are also strong and tenacious. You are the ant that has saved the world countless times, not for recognition or fame or glory but because you have decided it is your responsibility.” A beat. “To me you are magnificent and I am honored to call you a friend.”
Dean’s face was on fire, he was never sure how to deal with compliments. It wasn’t like he got them all the time-just the opposite really. People expected him to do well and when he did anything less they judged him for it. He judged himself. When he was depressed they simply told him to suck it up and do better. Either be perfect or go home. Yet there was no way he could be perfect and he didn’t have a home to go to. So he just…was.
Change the subject! “So grooming.” He hauled himself up to lean against the headboard. “They uh, they look okay to me. Any problem spots?”
“No.” Castiel shook them.
Saying fuck it, Dean grabbed the one closest to him and petted like it was a cute fluffy animal. He could get used to this. “Thanks, Cas.”
He didn’t say what for but as usual Castiel knew. “You’re welcome Dean.”
~*~
After breakfast Dean plopped himself down into the floor of Bobby’s study with several books so that he could get in on their researching. He had no damn idea what he was looking for so starting basically considered of picking whatever looked the oldest and giving it a try. Bobby had books in all shapes, sizes and languages and he could understand every one of them. As far as Dean knew he was self taught too which was pretty damn cool. It was no wonder other hunters trusted him and often turned to him for advice.
Sam had decided to take a different approach and was using his laptop, to which Dean had joked he didn’t think Wikipedia would have what they were looking for. There were in fact some things you couldn’t Google, not that that was going to stop Sam in the slightest. His massive form was bent over the keyboard and every so often flicking pieces of hair out of his face. He was so calm about all of this.
“Hey.” Dean threw a balled up piece of paper at him. “You okay?”
His brother arched a brow. “I’m fine. Why?”
Dean shrugged. “You haven’t tried to get me to talk about my feelings once.”
Sam snorted. “Do you wanna talk about your feelings, Dean?”
He sent him a blank look. “No. But I guess I’m just used to you whining at me either way.”
Sam grinned despite himself. “If I thought you were having trouble with this then yeah I would try to get you to open up. But you seem to be okay for the most part. And besides Cas isn’t worried so…” They both looked to where Castiel was perched, idly flipping through the biggest, heaviest manuscript that Bobby owned. “He would never just sit and read if you were in any danger. He’d be off trying to find a solution.”
True. “Speaking of, he’s gonna be hanging with us long term. Gonna teach him how to be a hunter.”
“I figured as much.” Sam said smugly. “It’s cool with me. Honestly I like it when Cas is around because it means there is someone else there to watch your back while you watch everyone else’s back.”
“You sound like he’s gonna make me eat my vegetables or something.”
“He might. I would fully support that and I’m sure your organs would too.”
“Of course you would Samantha.”
“It would be prudent for you to eat a fruit every now and then.” Castiel responded while reading. “The apple filing in a pie does not count.”
Crazy talk! “If you’re gonna gang up on me with Gloria Child over there you can just flitter on off. Or better yet you and Sam can braid each others’ hair while talking about what you wanna keep in your hope chests.”
Sam took a swig of his bottled water but he had a little smile on his face. “And would that chest be at the foot of your bed, Dean?”
Dean pretended not to hear him. It was one thing for him to know where Castiel had slept last night and another entirely to talk about it. “Anyway. Cas after we make sure I’m not the spawn of Chucky or whatever we’re gonna be heading out. We can stop by the Good Will if you want and get you some clothes.”
Castiel’s finger paused on the page he was skimming. “I do not mind wearing yours. They are comfortable.”
He liked the sound of that and kinda hated himself for it. “Oh. Okay you can do that but I just thought you’d want something of your own. So it’s like yours, ya know?”
The angel brightened a little. “Yes. Perhaps I will choose something. I am quite fond of pockets.”
Only Cas could manage to be a million years old and endearing at the same time. “Awesome.”
“If you two idgits are done flirting…” Bobby interrupted gruffly. “Listen to this. It’s from the book of Daniel. He replied, Do you know why I have come? Soon I must return to fight against the spirit prince of the kingdom of Persia, and after that the spirit prince of the kingdom of Greece will come. Meanwhile, I will tell you what is written in the Book of Truth. (No one helps me against these spirit princes except Michael, your spirit prince.)”
“And that means?” Dean asked.
“It is Gabriel speaking to Daniel.” Castiel replied without hesitation. “He is explaining why it took him so long to answer Daniel’s prayers. It is because he and Michael were fighting demons. Fallen angels.”
Sam shifted in his chair. “Sounds like Michael was supposed to be all about saving people.” He glanced to his brother. “Sounds familiar.”
Castiel exhaled and then recited from memory, “Michael, one of the holy angels, who, presiding over human virtue, commands the nations. That is from the book of Enoch. He is also referenced as being merciful and patient-qualities which I do think Dean shares.”
Dean’s forehead tightened as he frowned. “Yeah well when we popped back to the seventies to stop Anna from wasting our parents, he told me a lot of bullshit about how I couldn’t fight City Hall. Came off like every other angel douche-bag I’ve met…besides you.” In fact… “I kinda thought this whole jump start the apocalypse thing was his idea anyway.”
Castiel slowly tilted his head to the side. “I assume Michael fell prey to the same longing and desire for our Father that many other angels experienced. He was always the dutiful son; if anyone felt his loss the most it would be Michael. But he loved humanity in his own way much like you do. He believed in protecting the earth from evil and corruption.”
Wonder what the hell happened then? Dean thought to himself. How could Michael go from keeping people safe to wanting to boil half the planet just to get paradise? Was it really just because he missed his dad? Suddenly he remembered taking a crow bar to his car and hunting down vampires with a psycho. It wasn’t the same as killing half the population but he could-begrudgingly-sort of understand his state of mind. When you spend most of your life doing what your dad asks you and trying to be a good son, and he just ditches you, it does make you wonder if you screwed up somehow.
While he had enjoyed his time out on his own he’d still wondered if John had left him because he’d stopped measuring up. Hell, maybe he’d never really measured up in the first place.
Bobby coughed. “Well there is some stuff here about Revelation but I’m sure we’re all familiar with that. Not exactly much else.”
“The Bible actually says very little about Michael.” Castiel explained to them.
“So we’ll never figure out why I got his grace?” Great, just great. There goes our good luck.
“I have been studying these texts and I have a theory however I am not sure it is one you wish to hear.” The angel had all of their attention now. “Lucifer is dead and the Apocalypse mentioned in Revelation has been thwarted but naturally evil still roams the planet. There is no way to be sure some other creature won’t try to destroy the world.” He wet his lips. “That some other malicious entity won’t rise up to take the devil’s place.”
Sam tapped his pen against the desk. “What does that mean for Dean though?”
Castiel linked his fingers together. “At one point many; many years ago angels and demons freely walked the earth much as they do now. Possessions were quite common when the world was new-when Lucifer was attempting to gain ground against Heaven, sending out his forces to corrupt the innocent and to spur the wicked into action. Daniel prayed and humbled himself before God and so Gabriel came to help him…to…interpret a dream he’d had about the future.” His brows narrowed. “Dean has also prayed and humbled himself before God, and he was willing to serve Heaven wholeheartedly otherwise he could not have destroyed the Whore of Babylon. Honestly? I think someone was impressed with Dean’s devotion to protect and Michael’s grace is his reward.”
“But where is Michael?”
“Michael…is Dean.”
“You mean Michael was reborn as Dean?”
“No. I mean Michael has become Dean. My theory is that with Lucifer being gone, Michael felt out of place. His one mission effectively over, paradise out of reach and our Father still missing, he was at a loss of what do to. So he decided to go back to basics…as it were. He allowed himself to merge with Dean and to let Dean be the dominate force.”
“Yeah but Lucifer died after Dean said yes.”
“Time is nothing when you have the entire universe at your disposal.”
Squeezing the bridge of his nose because of his oncoming headache, Dean scowled. “Okay, so you’re saying Michael has basically jumped ship to me, giving me his grace but he’s gonna lay low forever? I don’t know if I buy that. Wouldn’t he just try to get everything back on the rails?”
In a very human gesture, Castiel rubbed the back of his neck. “To what purpose? Dean, Michael never wanted to kill Lucifer. He never wanted to fight him but he did and would have again because he felt it was the right thing to do. Now his brother is dead but the world is still being plagued by the vile and the violent. Michael is a protector of the people…just like you. Perhaps in the end he decided your course of action was best.”
Sam jumped out of his seat. “So Michael is kinda like Dean’s vessel! Dean gets the powers and Michael just…sleeps or something, like with you and Jimmy? I didn’t know angels could do that.”
Castiel smirked. “As the Prince of Heaven Michael can do whatever he pleases. This way he gets to help and yet he doesn’t have to make any of the hard choices. I have doubts that Michael will ever surface again…unless our Father returns. He is in essence trusting Dean to do the right thing by him and the innocents that need your help.”
Shit.
It was kinda convoluted but it also made a weird sort of sense. And it freaked Dean the hell out. Getting up, he made his way into the kitchen and grabbed a beer from the fridge before stepping out onto the back porch. The Michael from the past had been a total asshole basically telling him that no matter what, he couldn’t defeat his destiny. That he was gonna be a pretty pink prom dress and help bring about the end of the world. It was fucken insane to think that because he had resisted tooth and nail that Michael had, what? Come to admire him? Remember the good old days of smiting demons?
Of course Lucifer’s death played a major part.
In some jacked up way killing his brother had become Michael’s purpose. Well the devil was iced; what now?
“This is fucked up.” He mumbled to no one. “Why me?”
It was selfish of Michael to wanna help people and yet not want to get his hands dirty. If he could he would reach down into his subconscious and kick his ass! And what if he did decide to pop up again? Dean didn’t wanna be on the crapper and suddenly lose control of limbs. Fuck, he hoped he stayed buried. He also hoped he could handle all of this shit.
~*~
“How’s he doing?”
Castiel hummed from where he leaned against an aged truck, watching Dean attempt to lift heavy pieces of iron and rip the doors off of old cars. Strength training he had called it. “Your brother is determined to not show how bothered he is by our earlier discoveries. He has devoted himself to mastering his new abilities.”
Sam smiled thoughtfully. “Sounds about right.” Pause. “You think he is going to be okay? That Michael won’t take him over?”
“I am almost positive.” He replied. “Michael was never one for revenge; it would have made him no better than Lucifer.”
“Do you really think Michael gave up his powers to help Dean hunt?” Sam bit his bottom lip. “Or is there something you’re not telling us?”
In a fit of irritation, Dean growled and slammed his shoulder against an old pickup truck with no back wheels. It tilted onto its right side with a deep metal groan before going belly up, the top denting in onto the cab. He let out a woo and flashed them both a thumbs up. Things were uncertain but it was wonderful to see Dean smile. It made him hearken back to an arm around his shoulders with Dean’s honest laughter in his ears.
“I think Michael saw potential in Dean that-after the fact-he chose to nurture instead of stifle.”
“He does have a way with angels, doesn’t he?”
For once what Sam was implying did not go over Castiel’s head. “I suppose though I can only speak for myself.”
Sam scuffed his feet on the ground. “You know he’s really happy you’re gonna be hunting with us. And I am too.” He sighed. “It’s been a tough few months and I’m glad we all made it out in one piece.”
Except for Ellen and Joanna Beth. “Are you still worried about Lucifer?”
Sam shook his head. “No I know he’s dead. I just-I’m worried I can’t go back to the person I was before him and Ruby and the demon blood crap. I don’t crave it anymore or anything but it did affect me. It urged me to do terrible things.” His face fell, his eyes distressed. “I nearly choked my own brother to death. And Dean says he’s okay and that it’s all water under the bridge but it never should have happened in the first place. I keep thinking what if I had done it? What if I had killed him?”
Castiel knew the answer to that question; the angels would have simply brought him back. “It is best not to dwell on the past. You have a chance at a fresh start without the threat of the devil hanging over your head. Besides, we have all done regrettable things at one point or another. Things we must atone for.”
“I’m gonna try to be a better brother.” He smiled. “Stop forgetting the pie for starters.”
The angel shared his smile. “Dean would be very happy to hear that.”
“Hey!” Bobby waved them all in from where he hung out of the back door. “We’ve got a visitor.”
Falling in step beside each other, they entered the house to find Crowley sitting on the edge of Bobby’s desk. Castiel hated him on principle of course because he was a demon but Crowley was a particularly horrible sort being the King of the crossroads. He was devious and intelligent and more powerful than he was letting on. Which meant he was a danger to all of those around him, even if he had helped once or twice.
Dean took one step into the room and stopped, his face morphing into a horrified grimace. “Holy shit.”
Sam’s brows went up. “What’s wrong?”
Dean shuddered. “I can see flickers of Crowley’s true face now and trust me, it ain’t pretty.”
Crowley smirked. “Well someone has been eating his grace Wheaties…which is good because you’re going to need them. Bad news gents, you fucked up.”
Dean waved a hand. “Get on with it asshole.”
“One word. Croatoan.” The demon snapped. “It. Got. Out.”
“What?” Sam gasped. “That’s impossible! We blew up the warehouse!”
“You must have missed a spot.” Crowley rolled his eyes. “Maybe it was in one of those sniveling little survivors you just had to save. Either way it’s out there and you know what happens next boys and girls. We’re all fucked.”
Castiel’s mind immediately recalled a passage in the book of Daniel about Michael; At that time Michael, the great prince who protects your people, will arise. There will be a time of distress such as not happened from the beginning of nations until then. It wasn’t the entire segment but suddenly it felt very appropriate, especially if Crowley’s words were true. They were all about to be heavily tested.
Chapter Four