good grief

[rhearhea4]

i am so tired of everything. i wish i was graduating this year so i could move on, past everything that bellville ever reminds me of. all of my troubles are orbiting around Austin. i NEED to break up with him, for ME. but i know i won't. i know i should, but i won't. i am too dependent on ALWAYS having someone there. we're probably going to break

Comments

[_____12345]

i wish this was true. i wish you would actually break up with him tonight. i wish you would see that you DONT need him sense you always feel like this. i wish you would be happy and joyous and carefree and just how you ushuall are..lately you havent been that way at all. and theres only one reason behind that: austin. can you not see all this? if its meant to be then yall are gonna be. just not right now. you need to break up with him and trust God to help you heal soon. just surround yourself with your friends..its christmas time and just..focus all your attention on something/someone else. something healthy for you..something that makes you feel amazing instead of horrible all the time. just not austin. break up with him, rhea. i don't like saying that but you need to. i love you so much and i miss you.

[rhearhea4]

i'm glad you told me that.. i always want you to tell me the truth.. and i know i should break up with him.. but everytime i get the courage.. something goes well.. and if we actually get INTO the conversation i always end up chickening out. what i would really like to do is go this whole thanksgiving break w/o talking to him (which, i will) and see how it effects me.. i want you to tell me.. whenever you see me @ the quincinera and places you tell me if you notice a difference.. if you don't its okay.. and i don't want you to say you do just because you know i'd be better off without austin.. i want you to seriously tell me.. and i know i haven't been me lately, but there are other reasons behind that that i just don't tell anyone and i need to tell you so.. someday, we will talk. i love you so much and i miss myself too, and i will take your advice, thank you SO MUCH for telling me how you feel.

[_____12345]

i will tell you when i notice you being happier and more yourself..hopefully i see this sometime soon. and i wont just say that because i want you to be without him, hopefully you know i wouldnt do that. i don't know what else is behind you feeling so bad lately but if you wanna tell me, which i hope you do, then you know i'm here. i wanna do something with you over thanksgiving break. please? lets do something FUN. you needa have fun and who else would you have fun with besides ME?! you better not talk to him at all over this upcoming break..if you i find out you do then i will be angry. got that? i love you and i'm sure i'll continue telling you how i feel on this..so be prepared.