Comments | rhythmnbold: days burnin' out like a ciggarette..

rhythmnbold

days burnin' out like a ciggarette..

Oct 20, 2003 13:02

I'm..losing..it.

"If you're that depressed, then you need HELP."
"You're busy. ALWAYS."

I hate where I am.
I hate what's happening.

"I'm tired of pushing."

I hate the tears.. endless.. tears.

What hope is left when you don't even see the need or have the will to survive your life?

holding it all back
just hoping it'll disappearI don't ( Read more... )

Comments 8

dannydave October 20 2003, 17:35:54 UTC

Well, if it counts for anything, I'm proud of you for having the guts to live through all the shit that comes with being 17. And you'll be proud of yourself when you move out and realize you made it, and that no one, not even your parents and friends can change who you have become and who you choose to love.

Parents just get frustrated and jealous.
Frustrated from the stress and hard work it takes to raise a child from birth, teach them your values and thoughts, and watch them mature from your best friend and giggle buddy to your worst nightmare and source of countless nights in tears.
Jealous because they wish they were you, living through it all once again.

But they do love you, I promise:)

rhythmnbold October 20 2003, 20:15:19 UTC

I hate how I had to be like everyone else and lose her just like everyone else had to.

I always thought I'd be THE one that somehow kept close with her mother throughout high school.

Guess.Not.

Heh.. anyways, I meant to thank you for that- you always encourage me.

uofr34k October 20 2003, 20:36:11 UTC

Wow.. depressing entry.

Wish I could have been there when all that shit was going on. :(

Families suck don't they? My mom's a liar. My dad's a dick. Grandma's cool though.

Sure, everyone says we'll appreciate them later.. but that doesn't mean we have to appreciate them now, right?

Anyways, baby.. you'll be fine. I promise. You KNOW your mom and sister love you. :)

I love you, Jen. You're totally rad. :D lol.

-Joseph Clyde Silva

rhythmnbold October 20 2003, 20:41:23 UTC

Hm, yes- but without a family.. well, I don't even wanna THINK about where I would be right now. Heh.

Of course I'll be fine, right? Nothing's ever gonna be okay again, but it will seem that way, and we'll overcome it, pass it, and it'll seem like everything's peachy.

Fuck the negativity, right? heh

daisie s wav e: i'm just sad as hell.

justforjane October 20 2003, 20:55:17 UTC

I had this really cool comment written out. And then my computer died. But Joey... "you're totally rad"- God, doesn't that sum things up perfectly.

dannydave October 21 2003, 11:16:45 UTC

I don't like to bring this up, but it seems you could use something to relate to ( ... )

rhythmnbold October 21 2003, 14:29:16 UTC

God damn that's fucked up as hell..

I'm so sorry, I can't even begin to imagine going through something like that.

dannydave October 23 2003, 03:27:18 UTC

Well the point was that no matter what life throws at you, it can be turned around into something good.

A death of someone you love can instead of being an end of a life, can be a begining of a new life for you.
Ect, ect.

The key to keeping focus on what matters, is not letting the major shit bog you down.
Fighting about little shit, or getting worried over little shit is actually good.
Because, when all you have to care about is where the fuck your toothbrush went, you know you have the rough shit under control.
So fuck it, if you can't change it, or benefit from it, fuck it and don't worry about it.
If I get a bill I dunno how I will pay I don't worry until it comes time to pay, then if I have to I go make the money somehow.
It will ALWAYS "Somehow" work out too, that's the crazy thing.
Just let the major shit chill on its own and it will work itself out, yep yep.