I didn't think I still had this problem.
I was at work yesterday, working hard and doing what I was supposed to and I'm taking this families order and the man gives me £20 note.
I hit the button and the drawer opens and I count out his change - £4.95, then I close the draw and hand it to him. All of a sudden he is shouting at me to give him £5 and I notice that during the time I was counting out his change a 5p coin had turned up. I calmly explained that I had already cashed it and closed the drawer so couldn't give him another pound coin. He then tells me that I saw what he was doing and thus should have done it. His wife/girlfriend then backs me up and says that he should take his change. He storms off in a huff and I hand the change to his wife and proceed to get their food.
Now I may have improved my self-esteem but when someone starts having a go at me for a "mistake" or an actual genuine mistake that I have made, my brain automatically makes me feel like shit. What people need to do when I make a mistake is calmly tell me that I didn't get it right and then show/tell me, without making me feel like I did it on purpose. I was nearly crying because this man didn't like the fact that I gave him the change that he should of got.
This has actually happened a few times at work before.
When I was working on window, I learnt that when there were no customers, I had to make sure that we were stocked up on napkins and straws. After I was told this customers turned up, so I took their orders. After they were gone I was counting how many things we had so I knew what to pick up and the person who told me to stock up came and grabbed the napkin packs out of my hand and said: "How hard can it be to do what I told you to do?". My brain froze and I stammered out my response about how I had customers and was just about to do the task, they then proceeded to stuff the packs into the holder and told me to make sure that there were 8 and that the bottom shelf was filled with straws. Except I misunderstood the 8 for the total needed, not the total I was then supposed to fetch. So later I was told by the same person not to do a "half-arsed job" and "to put a little effort in". Once again I was trying not to cry.
I feel pathetic about the situation but at work, I still go by my old name and a lot of the progress I made confidence wise actually works if I am called Ethan and I know that people know or assume I am male. When this stuff happens at school I can shrug it off, even in most situations where I can be presumed I am female I still can shrug it off. I hate feeling like I am going to cry at work, but that is how my brain responds and when that happens, I go off and hide in my mind to keep myself safe and happy.
Sometimes I bloody hate the way my mind works. I guess I need to learn not to take it personally, even though they are personal attacks.
The good news is that he was the first crazy ass customer I've had since my first day a month ago. All I hope is that that man's child doesn't grow up thinking its okay to shout at people for stupid reasons.
I hit the button and the drawer opens and I count out his change - £4.95, then I close the draw and hand it to him. All of a sudden he is shouting at me to give him £5 and I notice that during the time I was counting out his change a 5p coin had turned up. I calmly explained that I had already cashed it and closed the drawer so couldn't give him another pound coin. He then tells me that I saw what he was doing and thus should have done it. His wife/girlfriend then backs me up and says that he should take his change. He storms off in a huff and I hand the change to his wife and proceed to get their food.
Now I may have improved my self-esteem but when someone starts having a go at me for a "mistake" or an actual genuine mistake that I have made, my brain automatically makes me feel like shit. What people need to do when I make a mistake is calmly tell me that I didn't get it right and then show/tell me, without making me feel like I did it on purpose. I was nearly crying because this man didn't like the fact that I gave him the change that he should of got.
This has actually happened a few times at work before.
When I was working on window, I learnt that when there were no customers, I had to make sure that we were stocked up on napkins and straws. After I was told this customers turned up, so I took their orders. After they were gone I was counting how many things we had so I knew what to pick up and the person who told me to stock up came and grabbed the napkin packs out of my hand and said: "How hard can it be to do what I told you to do?". My brain froze and I stammered out my response about how I had customers and was just about to do the task, they then proceeded to stuff the packs into the holder and told me to make sure that there were 8 and that the bottom shelf was filled with straws. Except I misunderstood the 8 for the total needed, not the total I was then supposed to fetch. So later I was told by the same person not to do a "half-arsed job" and "to put a little effort in". Once again I was trying not to cry.
I feel pathetic about the situation but at work, I still go by my old name and a lot of the progress I made confidence wise actually works if I am called Ethan and I know that people know or assume I am male. When this stuff happens at school I can shrug it off, even in most situations where I can be presumed I am female I still can shrug it off. I hate feeling like I am going to cry at work, but that is how my brain responds and when that happens, I go off and hide in my mind to keep myself safe and happy.
Sometimes I bloody hate the way my mind works. I guess I need to learn not to take it personally, even though they are personal attacks.
The good news is that he was the first crazy ass customer I've had since my first day a month ago. All I hope is that that man's child doesn't grow up thinking its okay to shout at people for stupid reasons.