I've just realized how shallow I am and I hate it. I feel so horrible, but I don't know how to change it. I've always envisioned this perfect man for me and I've never wanted to settle for anything less. I've probably passed up some really great guys simply because they didn't fit that image I had in my head, yet I still complain all the time about how lonely I am. I feel like a fool and a hypocrite. I feel like I'm not even deserving of that love I so long for. I know that physical attraction is important to some degree, and I definitely have liked guys I haven't found very attractive at first meeting them, but sometimes I feel I take it too far. I definitely have some character traits I look for and desire in somebody, but I think my standards as far as physical attractiveness goes are often too high. I don't know. I'm conflicted. I like men who take care of themselves, so I tend to like guys with a nice build (muscular, thin, average). I'm repelled by obesity. But now I've been called shallow and I feel bad about this. Should I? I
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anonymous
August 1 2006, 14:03:44 UTC
I was thinking about it, very hard. And i realized that the thought of intamacy and relationships in general absolutely disgusts me. I joke all the time about being asexual but for the first time I'm terrified that I might be.
I can't express how great I think you are. I hate pretty, cool, fun, smart girls, but you're awesome. When I meet people I expect to dislike becasue theyre too damn perfect, I think to myself that I should give them a chace because they could be like you. Seriously.
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And I have no sympathy for the fatties.
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But I don't want to be alone forever.
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