Fic: All We Are
Title: All We Are
Pairing(s): Machida/Ohno, implied Ohmiya
Rating: PG-13
Wordcount: 827
Disclaimer: Do. Not. Own. Unfortunately.
Summary: Machida knew he was in love, but he knew he couldn't win against Arashi
Author's Notes: For Kailice, Sarah, for being an awesome friend <3
*
We won't say our goodbyes
You know it's better that way
We won't break, we won't die
It's just a moment of change
All we are, all we are
Is everything that's right
All we need, all we need
A lover’s alibi
- All We Are by One Republic
*
Machida thought that there was something incredible about falling in love and being in love with your best friend, the boy he grew up with, saw the scraped knees, heard the broken voice, witnessed temper tantrums, tears, joy and bad days and colorful, dreadful costumes. Screw the fact that his parents told him he was too young to be in love, that he didn’t know what it was and what it meant.
He felt it, so it had to be the truth.
Because when Ohno smiled at him, that wry grin that started with a twitch of the left corner of his mouth before it curled into a smile, Machida felt his heart speed up and his mouth go dry.
Two years in Kyoto had flown by so fast Machida only wanted to press stop and rewind, because the life and existence in Tokyo wasn’t the secluded paradise they had had for themselves for two whole years.
Coming back to Tokyo had been both good and bad. It felt like coming back to the civilization, being able to see their families daily, being able to see their old friends. But it had also meant that they went back to living with their families and not living with each other, which had been a privilege that Machida hadn’t foreseen when he went to Kyoto.
Now that Tokyo’s busy and rustling streets had become their everyday, Machida missed the bubble they had been living in for so long, two years that had felt like such a long time but had sped up, up, up, until he felt breathless and exhilarated and wanted to shout his happiness. Because sometimes it had been hard, at times they had felt like giving up, but they had pulled through, done what they set out to do.
Machida smiled, seeing Ohno do a series of tour jetés, not for the first time admiring Ohno’s grace.
“I just want to dance,” Ohno had said one night, “I don’t care about the singing, only the dance.”
Machida had agreed, but didn’t want to say that he’d miss hearing Ohno sing. But he did anyway, and Ohno had promised to keep singing for him. But, if they could just dance forever, then just…maybe.
*
“Only me,” Machida had said, greedily, being too young and too foolish to realize what he was asking of Ohno.
Ohno hadn’t replied verbally, but had kissed Machida’s lips shyly.
*
“We’re Musical Academy, I’m Machida Shingo,” Machida said proudly, barely refraining to sling an arm around Ohno. Ohno smiled slightly, nervously.
“Ohno Satoshi,” he said and bowed along with the rest of them.
We made it.
*
“You’re not happy,” Machida said.
“Macchin, it’s just, MA is not me.”
“But we’re dancing.”
Ohno looked apologetic.
But Machida knew. If Ohno didn’t want this, then he wouldn’t either. “I know.”
*
“Debut?” He said, full of disbelief into the receiver of the phone. His eyes widened. “Hawaii? What, why? With who?”
Ohno’s tired voice told him names, and one name that would forever be etched into Machida’s brain. Arashi.
“Congratulations,” Machida said and almost felt it, too. Ohno deserved it, but did the older boy want it? Machida knew he didn’t.
And when he heard laughter in the background on the other end, along with a hushed “Ninomiya, I’m not finished yet,” Machida smiled bitterly and said, “You’re busy, you’ll call me, ne?” and he hung up when Ohno had whispered his goodbye.
Ninomiya.
*
Machida saw it happen as much as he felt it. It became so hard to see Ohno. Ohno’s schedule was suddenly filled to the brim - Arashi, Arashi, Arashi. In the beginning, Ohno often came to see him, to unwind and say the things Machida knew he wouldn’t say to his new bandmates. Things like “I don’t know if I can do it,” “I can’t, I just can’t,” and “why do they expect that of me?”
It gradually became rarer visits; Machida felt them like stolen moments. Ohno’s thoughts changed, his insecurities changed and gradually became thoughts of “I think we can do this,” “I think we’ll be okay,” and “we’ll show them.”
Machida just missed the Ohno that spoke of ‘we’ and ‘us’ as Machida and Ohno, but now it just wasn’t like that. And Machida didn’t dare mentioning how often Ohno’s tales of what he’d done and experienced circled around Ninomiya Kazunari.
*
“This…just, be happy.”
“Macchin,” Ohno only said, brows furrowed, but Machida knew that even Ohno couldn’t deny it.
“I’m going to quit,” Machida said. “But I’ll be back at one point. Do your best. And be happy.”
And when he kissed Ohno then, he knew it was the last time. But he was happy then, because he let go of Ohno.
*
Years later, seeing and hearing Arashi everywhere, the only thing that stung his heart was knowing that Ohno wasn’t singing for him anymore.
At least Ohno was still singing.
*
/The End
AN: Ouch, Machida, I’m sorry ;;__;; Written for Sarah, because I prompted her to write me some Ohno/Machida and I ended up wanting to write it, too xD I’m glad you enjoyed it, sweetheart :)
Pairing(s): Machida/Ohno, implied Ohmiya
Rating: PG-13
Wordcount: 827
Disclaimer: Do. Not. Own. Unfortunately.
Summary: Machida knew he was in love, but he knew he couldn't win against Arashi
Author's Notes: For Kailice, Sarah, for being an awesome friend <3
*
We won't say our goodbyes
You know it's better that way
We won't break, we won't die
It's just a moment of change
All we are, all we are
Is everything that's right
All we need, all we need
A lover’s alibi
- All We Are by One Republic
*
Machida thought that there was something incredible about falling in love and being in love with your best friend, the boy he grew up with, saw the scraped knees, heard the broken voice, witnessed temper tantrums, tears, joy and bad days and colorful, dreadful costumes. Screw the fact that his parents told him he was too young to be in love, that he didn’t know what it was and what it meant.
He felt it, so it had to be the truth.
Because when Ohno smiled at him, that wry grin that started with a twitch of the left corner of his mouth before it curled into a smile, Machida felt his heart speed up and his mouth go dry.
Two years in Kyoto had flown by so fast Machida only wanted to press stop and rewind, because the life and existence in Tokyo wasn’t the secluded paradise they had had for themselves for two whole years.
Coming back to Tokyo had been both good and bad. It felt like coming back to the civilization, being able to see their families daily, being able to see their old friends. But it had also meant that they went back to living with their families and not living with each other, which had been a privilege that Machida hadn’t foreseen when he went to Kyoto.
Now that Tokyo’s busy and rustling streets had become their everyday, Machida missed the bubble they had been living in for so long, two years that had felt like such a long time but had sped up, up, up, until he felt breathless and exhilarated and wanted to shout his happiness. Because sometimes it had been hard, at times they had felt like giving up, but they had pulled through, done what they set out to do.
Machida smiled, seeing Ohno do a series of tour jetés, not for the first time admiring Ohno’s grace.
“I just want to dance,” Ohno had said one night, “I don’t care about the singing, only the dance.”
Machida had agreed, but didn’t want to say that he’d miss hearing Ohno sing. But he did anyway, and Ohno had promised to keep singing for him. But, if they could just dance forever, then just…maybe.
*
“Only me,” Machida had said, greedily, being too young and too foolish to realize what he was asking of Ohno.
Ohno hadn’t replied verbally, but had kissed Machida’s lips shyly.
*
“We’re Musical Academy, I’m Machida Shingo,” Machida said proudly, barely refraining to sling an arm around Ohno. Ohno smiled slightly, nervously.
“Ohno Satoshi,” he said and bowed along with the rest of them.
We made it.
*
“You’re not happy,” Machida said.
“Macchin, it’s just, MA is not me.”
“But we’re dancing.”
Ohno looked apologetic.
But Machida knew. If Ohno didn’t want this, then he wouldn’t either. “I know.”
*
“Debut?” He said, full of disbelief into the receiver of the phone. His eyes widened. “Hawaii? What, why? With who?”
Ohno’s tired voice told him names, and one name that would forever be etched into Machida’s brain. Arashi.
“Congratulations,” Machida said and almost felt it, too. Ohno deserved it, but did the older boy want it? Machida knew he didn’t.
And when he heard laughter in the background on the other end, along with a hushed “Ninomiya, I’m not finished yet,” Machida smiled bitterly and said, “You’re busy, you’ll call me, ne?” and he hung up when Ohno had whispered his goodbye.
Ninomiya.
*
Machida saw it happen as much as he felt it. It became so hard to see Ohno. Ohno’s schedule was suddenly filled to the brim - Arashi, Arashi, Arashi. In the beginning, Ohno often came to see him, to unwind and say the things Machida knew he wouldn’t say to his new bandmates. Things like “I don’t know if I can do it,” “I can’t, I just can’t,” and “why do they expect that of me?”
It gradually became rarer visits; Machida felt them like stolen moments. Ohno’s thoughts changed, his insecurities changed and gradually became thoughts of “I think we can do this,” “I think we’ll be okay,” and “we’ll show them.”
Machida just missed the Ohno that spoke of ‘we’ and ‘us’ as Machida and Ohno, but now it just wasn’t like that. And Machida didn’t dare mentioning how often Ohno’s tales of what he’d done and experienced circled around Ninomiya Kazunari.
*
“This…just, be happy.”
“Macchin,” Ohno only said, brows furrowed, but Machida knew that even Ohno couldn’t deny it.
“I’m going to quit,” Machida said. “But I’ll be back at one point. Do your best. And be happy.”
And when he kissed Ohno then, he knew it was the last time. But he was happy then, because he let go of Ohno.
*
Years later, seeing and hearing Arashi everywhere, the only thing that stung his heart was knowing that Ohno wasn’t singing for him anymore.
At least Ohno was still singing.
*
/The End
AN: Ouch, Machida, I’m sorry ;;__;; Written for Sarah, because I prompted her to write me some Ohno/Machida and I ended up wanting to write it, too xD I’m glad you enjoyed it, sweetheart :)