16 Stories Never Told
*waves*
Why hello.
I've been largely absent, and for that I'm sorry. Roommates and moodiness and dating (ok, well, one date) and work and excuses, excuses.
So I was playing with the Firefly Title Generator and decided to take what I found and write little snippets at fic that never was:
Title: Sixteen Stories Never Told
Author: Rinny
Words: 1,825
Characters: Crew
Summery: Various snippets of stories never told. Titles courtesy of the Firefly Title Generator.
Shepherd Book's Hot Demand
"Come again?" Mal's jaw dropped, his voice stuttering in the silence of Inara's shuttle.
Her shoulders were back, her eyes focused somewhere just short of his face. "He made me an offer."
"And you mean to except?" She nodded simply, a serene smile fixed over her lips. "But--but he's... old."
That made her smile, "Not that old, Mal."
His Sister's Rainbow
"River did what?" Mal yelled. Mal was always yelling.
Simon exhaled slowly, hoping that maybe the Captain would follow his example. "She altered course, as you know--"
"I do know. What I don't know is why and where the hell she is now!" Kaylee jumped as he slammed his hands on the table, glaring daggers at Simon.
He cleared his throat, "I'm getting to that."
"Consider yourself there."
"She intends to find the pot of gold."
"The pot of what?" he sputtered.
"Gold?" Jayne perked up.
Simon gave a resigned sigh. "At the end of the rainbow."
Kaylee's True Heart
"I--I'm ready," Kaylee breathed, her heart pounding in the cage of her chest, as though it were trying to escape her body, knowing their current endevour was futile.
"Gorram it, Kaylee," Mal cursed, beating futily at the door to the engine room. "It's too dangerous!"
"Are you sure?" Wash's voice came through the intercom, shaking despite his attempts at his usual cheer.
"I'm sure," she said with more confidence than she felt. "Wash? Tell--" she swallowed. "Tell the Captain I'm sorry."
Advice From A Smirking Stranger
"You ought not to to touch that," A cultured voice interupted Simon's investigation of the big red button.
"Why not?"
"Ever pressed a button like that and had anything good come of it?"
"Well... no." Simon straightened, regarding the button solumnly.
"Point made," the stranger pushed back a lock of hair that fell in his face. "Don't do it."
Kaylee's irritated voice rang in his ears, You're too damned safe all the time. Ain't gotta be scared of every little thing.
Well, it was rather a small button, taking into account all buttons. Resolutely he pressed his thumb to the plastic and held his breath.
When he released it again, he was looking up. And up. And up. The red button was miles above his head and gigantic. Yet, nothing compared to the stranger towering over him.
"Oh, GOD!" It came out high pitched and squeaking, nothing like his normal voice. But then, nothing at the moment was normal. He was two inches tall.
"I told you not to press it."
I Sex One Whore And I Get Lusty Cider
Simon made a face, gazing disgustedly down at Jayne's crotch. "You have what?"
Jayne exhaled with irritation, "Ain't you supposed to be a doctor? Top ten percent? Ain't you never heard of Lusty Cider?"
Tempted By A Stolen Sky
Mal's gaze shifted from one member of his crew to the next, bestowing each of them with a grave look he hoped reflected the seriousness of the situation. "Now, I ain't expectin' ya to stay on. Not knowin' what's coming. Not knowing anything 'cept it'll be bad. But I'm goin'. And I can't think of no better crew to take me there, then the one I'm lookin' at."
Zoe and Wash exchanged a wordless glance and then she looked at him, giving him an impreceptible nod.
Kaylee straightened in her chair, "I ain't leavin' Serenity to no one else."
Simon looked worriedly to his sister for a moment, before looking back to Mal. "You'll need a doctor."
Mal heard Jayne snorting and refused to look at him, shifting his gaze to Book. "Can't see how you'd be of much help, Shepherd."
"Where there's war, there's those looking for salvation," he replied evenly.
Finally, he looked to Jayne. "Not like to be much coin in it."
The mercenary grimaced, "Awh, Hell, Mal. You're a damn fool, goin' back to that war." He took a swig of Kaylee's engine brew from his cup. "Even fools need someone to watch their backs."
Your Coin Or Your Rambling John Thomas
Jayne held his hands up over his head, quivering with anger. "Gonna come after you. Wont rest till I do. I swear so on my ruttin' father's grave."
The woman mearly tossed her hair, pointing Lilah at his bare groin. "Mighty fine tool ya got there. Be really awful if somethin' happened to it."
Jayne's rage was beyond words.
She palmed the small bag of coin that contained the crew's share of the take from the sale. "You were awful good," she purred, opening the satchel and withdrawing three coins, leaving them on the dresser in the corner of the room. "Worth that much at least."
She flounced from the room making a quick getaway, leaving him naked and tied to the bed.
"Mal's gonna space me."
Sometimes, It Takes A Man-Ape
"Wow."
"Wow."
"Just... wow."
"That was..."
"Yeah, it was."
"And--"
"Uh-huh."
"Wow."
"Ya said that already."
"I know, but... wow."
"I think I'm--"
"I know. Me too."
"Who knew Jayne could dance ballet?"
"An' good too."
"That tu-tu don't leave much to the imagination."
"Why do you think I said wow?"
Far From The Maddening Crew
Mal looked into the camera of the com on the deck. "Ya know what they say, silence gives you gold. Or some such."
"The saying is 'Silence is Golden'." Inara replied crisply. "A sentiment I'm very unfamilar with at the moment."
"Ahh, yeah? Crew givin' you and your girls troubles?"
Inara laughed quietly, "Troubles? Your crew? I've never heard such an understatement in my life."
"Want me should come get them? Might be able to cut my visit with my ma short." Mal offered, feeling slightly guitly.
"No, no, don't do that," she smiled softly. "It's just... Simon's giving the girls physicals and Kaylee... she's taking apart our entire heating system and put it back together again. And now it's--" she shook her head. "Let's just say, it's not condusive to entertaining clients."
"You know Kaylee get it sorted out."
"Oh, I know. If River hadn't taken it upon herself to replace the parts with pilfered underthings. God knows where the actual parts are now. And Jayne--!"
Mal groaned, "Sorry, Inara... we're breaking up. --can't--so sorry--tell Zoe and Wash I'll--see you---week. Bye."
Inara barely resisted slamming her fist into the screen, "Ruttin' Captain!"
Blood, Sweat & Forgotten Shiny Regret
River knew death as a physical thing. The shutting down of organ systems, the suffocation of the brain as he yearned from oxygen rich blood that wasn't coming.
In surprised her then, in these, her last moments, that she should feel anything beyond pain. But she did. A whole lifetime's worth of love, loss, anger and regret.
So many regrets.
She could change this moment. Instinctively, she knew it. Like she knew so many things she shouldn't after the Academy. All it would take, to erase this moment, to go back... she knew she could, suddenly and sickenly. She could go back.
The Way Of The Oaty Bar
Mal lowered his weapon, his brow furrowing with confusion. "You--you're what?"
Jayne's eyes skipped from one man to the other, his weapon still trained on the man dressed in beads, colored feathers poking from his hair. The men and women crouded behind him wore expression of giddy joy, their eyes dilated, even in the harsh light streaming from the doorway.
"We are the Fruity Oaty Bar." The man replied, bowing at the waist and giving Mal and wide smile.
"You're food?" Jayne burst.
"Biz hui." Mal narrowed his eyes, "You're food?"
"Gorram it!" Jayne scowled, "I ate that stuff!"
"Nay," the man replied. "We're the Order of the Oaty Bar. We live and worship the wonder that is the Fruity Oaty Bar."
Mal quirked his head. "Huh."
Wash's Land Of The Lubricant
"I said," Wash raised his voice over the noise at the table. "I found us a job."
Mal appeared to be the only one to hear him. "You did? How?"
"Um... ah... friend of mine?"
"Don't sound so certain there, Wash."
He leaned in closer to the Captain. "Not a friend so much as a....well..."
"Get out with it."
"An employer, you might say," he scratched at his hair.
"You might or you do?"
"Fine, fine, I do. We'd be transporting goods. All on the up and up. Pays good too."
"And...what might this employer have employed you to do?"
"I, uh... sold things. For... people. Who needed it. For... um... things. Personal things."
"What kind of things?"
"Does it matter?"
"I ain't gonna transport what I don't well know. What did you do for this fella?"
"It's not relevant!"
"Yes, it is!"
There was a pause at the table, as the rest of the occupants turned to the sound of yelling. "I was a lubricant salesman!"
Once Upon A Reaver
Jayne cocked his gun at the Reaver, his finger pulling on the trigger just as River jumped in front of the man--not-man, or whatever he was. "No!"
"Git, girl." he growled,
"No! Can't steal what's gone already. Can't take it again!" She rushed at Jayne, big brown eyes pleading. "Give it back."
"Give what back?" He scowled, "It's gotta die. You know what he'll do to us."
"Give him back him. Make him human again."
Around The 'Verse With A Floral Bonnet
Kaylee grinned, "I think he looks swai."
"Right pretty, I'd say," Zoe smiled at her Captain. "Fine way to make a living."
He scowled at them, "It works. An' you just be lucky I don't make Jayne be the girl."
Kaylee and Zoe sobered, exchanging a fearful look.
"Enough to give you nightmares."
You Can't Take The Tacky Shirt From Me
"No," Jayne folded his arms across his wide chest. "No ruttin' way!"
"Jayne, please?" Kaylee gave him her best pleading smile. "They're only clothes."
"An' the only one's I got! 'Sides, I like 'em!"
"Jayne, be reasonable," Simon sighed, trying again. "She's beside herself."
And in fact, Jayne could hear River's wild screeching echo up from the passenger dorms.
"No! She already got her paws on one, I'm not givin' her no more."
"Maybe just the nekkid girl ones?" Kaylee bargained. "She likes those best."
Simon groaned.
You Can Always Count On A Squeaky Boy Whore
Mal looked distrustfully at the boy standing in front of him. he could only be fifteen, on the outside sixteen. His blond hair was combed back from his face, just begining to curl at the ends. And he wore a conglomeration of brightly colored clothing, the ends trimmed with fringe and bells. And... was that make up?"
"River..." Mal used his no-nonsense voice, never taking his eyes off the boy.
"He is called Adrian." She supplied, her cheeks rosy with excitement as she bounced on her bare heels. "He is a whore."
"...."
"Can I keep him?"