My weekend
A couple of highlights from the weekend at Spring Fire, which rocked by the way. Hell of a good time over all. Good parties, cool people, drinking, neet toys, good food and a whole bunch of perverts! How can you go wrong?
I worked security at the event, and at one point a man came up to me after the registration had closed and tried to walk by me. I stopped him and he said, "Hey man what is all this?"
"An Alternative Lifestyle convention.", I replied.
"Oh like bondage and sex and shit!"
"Right."
"Can I go downstairs and take a look?"
"Not without a badge sir, no you can't. Sorry."
"I heard the women into this shit are all about sex and are easy, I just want to go down and pick a couple up, come on, please?" Note: This is exactly the type of person we DON'T want there.
"No sir, you can't go in without being a participant of the convention."
"I'll give you a hundred dollars!"
"No si..."
"Two hundred!"
"Sir you..."
"Three hundred! I have the money! Here!" He then pulls out a large wad of cash and sticks it in my face.
"No sir, I'm sorry. If you want to go down there, you need to register with the convention, the registration desk will be open tomorrow."
"What about the bar? Is that badge only?"
"No sir, that's the Hotel's bar, it's open for everybody."
"Can I pick up the sex chicks there?"
"If they are there and they like you, sure, go have fun."
"All right! Thanks!"
The guy was a dipshit, and sorry, I'm on a job, bribing me is just going to make me want to blackball him from the convention anyway, even if I didn't because of his attitude. :p
The next day I had to chase two 12 year old girls down a hall when they ran past me after I told them it was off limits. Thankfully they didn't see into any of the rooms, might have scarred them for life... actually now that I think of it... damn! Should have let them look into the rooms! I also turned away scores of families with small children in bathing suits who were looking for the pool. Great facial expressions when the parents realized what I was guarding. Heh heh. Also the ratio of cute women was much higher this year than in previous ones...
The true highlight of the weekend though was me showing my ass and penis to the tourists of Union Station... I was wearing one of my kilts, walking down the street and passed over a vent. A blast of air shot upwards and well... it felt really nice at least, and I didn't get arrested. A friend behind me exclaimed, "I saw man butt!". Truly a good time was had by all, can't wait until next year!
(Spring Fire a convention thrown by Dark Odyssey for those not in the know http://www.darkodyssey.com )