Samoan Thor
So, we need to talk about the best movie of the summer, Fast and Furious 6.
I saw it Thursday night but I waited until today to post about it so that hopefully more people will have seen it. My coherent, non-credits scene thoughts basically breakdown like this:
- Fucking amazing
- Vin Diesel and The Rock should always be in movies together
- The Rock should always ONLY wear skintight underarmor
- The Rock should always shoot vending machines so that Tyrese will shut up
- Tyrese should always play characters who own planes that say "It's Roman's, bitch!"
- Ludacris should always play the techie guy and should ALWAYS refer to The Rock as "Samoan Thor"
-- This joke seriously took me about 5 seconds to get when it showed up on his caller ID and then I giggled for like 3 minutes straight afterwards
- everything with that tank scene was fucking ridiculous and nonsensical and I loved it so much. (ditto a lot of the plane scene)
- Gisele and Han's opening scene where they immediately had each other's backs with their guns was so hot
- As were most of their scenes but also sad because as soon as they said they were going to Tokyo after this, I knew it would be nothing but doooooooom for them the rest of the movie. :(
- HOWEVER, while I am crushed that Gisele died, I realize they had no other choice because of the fucking Tokyo Drift and because she went out with 100% agency. She went out on her own terms, killing a dude that was about to kill Han.
- Also, can we talk about how fucking awesome these movies are when it comes to women? All of the women in these movies are badasses on their own and while Mia was a bit of a damsel in distress for this one, she was never helpless and she was the one who told Brian to go after Letty. ALSO, I LOVE that Elena told Dom to go after her too, none of this "no wait, you're with me now, let's set up a love triangle" bullshit that happens in so many movies, she just said "Hey, if that was my husband in that picture, I'd go after him, too." SO MUCH LOVE FOR ELENA (aka the actual Mrs. Thor. get it Hemsworth). And then Letty has been a badass since the first one (since Michelle Rodriguez is an all around badass, it makes sense) and while I immediately suspected that Riley was working with Shaw from the beginning, it was great to see an actual MMA fighter kick ass (and then Letty shot her with a harpoon gun because these movies are the best ever)
- Okay, let's talk about that credits scene, because I don't think I've ever gone from being so sad to so fucking exciting in such a short amount of time. They show Tokyo and I'm all "Oh nooooo, this is from Tokyo Drift, nooooooo." and watching my beautiful Han Seoul-Oh drive to his demise and then he crashes into the Mercedes and then, TO MY UTTER AND SHOCKED DELIGHT, a stocky, almost bald British dude steps out of the car and HE IS FUCKING JASON STATHAM. I almost don't even care that he killed Han, HE IS JASON STATHAM. I have never been so glad to be unspoiled for something in my whole life. (in case you do not know this about me, I have seen an inordinate amount of Jason Statham movies and watch the first 2 Transporter movies and Crank 2 way more often than anyone should. basically, I fucking love Jason Statham and was incredibly disappointed when I thought he was going to be in Fast 6 because he's a car dude AND he's European, so duh, why wouldn't he be in it?)
- here's the director talking about it and "I was very happy with the whole Jason Statham of it all. It feels good to be able to hand off on a positive note, with Statham joining the cast." is quite possibly the best quote of all time. This is the next best one, by The Rock: "The idea of seeing him and myself onscreen going at it is very intriguing and very interesting. Two styles that would collide extraordinarily well. My personal message to that person is: Pack a lunch, because it’ll be an all-f-ing-day affair.”
GOD I AM SO EXCITED FOR FAST 7 I COULD JUST THROW UP. AND IT COMES OUT NEXT YEAR!!!!!!! That's how you fucking do it, Hollywood.
ALSO, Arrested Development comes back this weekend, so, well done this week, Hollywood. WELL DONE. (Also, I hope to make a post about Hannibal soon, I'm just about to start episode 6. this show is amazing and marks the first time that a fandom being so delightfully weird on tumblr is why I started watching in the first place)
I saw it Thursday night but I waited until today to post about it so that hopefully more people will have seen it. My coherent, non-credits scene thoughts basically breakdown like this:
- Fucking amazing
- Vin Diesel and The Rock should always be in movies together
- The Rock should always ONLY wear skintight underarmor
- The Rock should always shoot vending machines so that Tyrese will shut up
- Tyrese should always play characters who own planes that say "It's Roman's, bitch!"
- Ludacris should always play the techie guy and should ALWAYS refer to The Rock as "Samoan Thor"
-- This joke seriously took me about 5 seconds to get when it showed up on his caller ID and then I giggled for like 3 minutes straight afterwards
- everything with that tank scene was fucking ridiculous and nonsensical and I loved it so much. (ditto a lot of the plane scene)
- Gisele and Han's opening scene where they immediately had each other's backs with their guns was so hot
- As were most of their scenes but also sad because as soon as they said they were going to Tokyo after this, I knew it would be nothing but doooooooom for them the rest of the movie. :(
- HOWEVER, while I am crushed that Gisele died, I realize they had no other choice because of the fucking Tokyo Drift and because she went out with 100% agency. She went out on her own terms, killing a dude that was about to kill Han.
- Also, can we talk about how fucking awesome these movies are when it comes to women? All of the women in these movies are badasses on their own and while Mia was a bit of a damsel in distress for this one, she was never helpless and she was the one who told Brian to go after Letty. ALSO, I LOVE that Elena told Dom to go after her too, none of this "no wait, you're with me now, let's set up a love triangle" bullshit that happens in so many movies, she just said "Hey, if that was my husband in that picture, I'd go after him, too." SO MUCH LOVE FOR ELENA (aka the actual Mrs. Thor. get it Hemsworth). And then Letty has been a badass since the first one (since Michelle Rodriguez is an all around badass, it makes sense) and while I immediately suspected that Riley was working with Shaw from the beginning, it was great to see an actual MMA fighter kick ass (and then Letty shot her with a harpoon gun because these movies are the best ever)
- Okay, let's talk about that credits scene, because I don't think I've ever gone from being so sad to so fucking exciting in such a short amount of time. They show Tokyo and I'm all "Oh nooooo, this is from Tokyo Drift, nooooooo." and watching my beautiful Han Seoul-Oh drive to his demise and then he crashes into the Mercedes and then, TO MY UTTER AND SHOCKED DELIGHT, a stocky, almost bald British dude steps out of the car and HE IS FUCKING JASON STATHAM. I almost don't even care that he killed Han, HE IS JASON STATHAM. I have never been so glad to be unspoiled for something in my whole life. (in case you do not know this about me, I have seen an inordinate amount of Jason Statham movies and watch the first 2 Transporter movies and Crank 2 way more often than anyone should. basically, I fucking love Jason Statham and was incredibly disappointed when I thought he was going to be in Fast 6 because he's a car dude AND he's European, so duh, why wouldn't he be in it?)
- here's the director talking about it and "I was very happy with the whole Jason Statham of it all. It feels good to be able to hand off on a positive note, with Statham joining the cast." is quite possibly the best quote of all time. This is the next best one, by The Rock: "The idea of seeing him and myself onscreen going at it is very intriguing and very interesting. Two styles that would collide extraordinarily well. My personal message to that person is: Pack a lunch, because it’ll be an all-f-ing-day affair.”
GOD I AM SO EXCITED FOR FAST 7 I COULD JUST THROW UP. AND IT COMES OUT NEXT YEAR!!!!!!! That's how you fucking do it, Hollywood.
ALSO, Arrested Development comes back this weekend, so, well done this week, Hollywood. WELL DONE. (Also, I hope to make a post about Hannibal soon, I'm just about to start episode 6. this show is amazing and marks the first time that a fandom being so delightfully weird on tumblr is why I started watching in the first place)