The ultimate truth.

[ripe_squash]

"Gary needs to be the rival in the next two Pokémon games.

I don't care if he's 30 by time they take place, it must happen. And he needs to be an even bigger asshole, too. Everytime his theme starts playing the player should recoil in fear because they know that his level 100 Blastoise is about to rape you.

At the end of a cave? Your Pokémon all

Comments

[ballistic_bars]

lmfao lmfao lmfao that was the greatest thing i've ever read in a long time thank you so much! i just joined the pokemon community! yessss

[ripe_squash]

haha yeah i picked this up from that community. i couldn't stop laughing when i first read it

[ballistic_bars]

that guys some kinda genius i think i'm gonna unjoin there are so many fuckin posts

[ripe_squash]

yeah they have a million posts about pokemon pearl/diamond which i have no clue about, but occasionally, they have interesting posts

[dontbejealous81]

did you get a new pokemon yet?
i want one named after me!

[ripe_squash]

ahahahhaha
yeah but it sucked so i just stored it in the computer.

[dontbejealous81]

get a better one that doesnt suck! lol
oommgg i love jigglypufff!
and pikachu.
those are the only two acceptable ones.
other than that pshh to them.

[stumpymoses]

i clicked onto your journal from what i wore today (ah. it's, like, two forty a.m. and i can't sleep) and this is friggin' hilarious.

(also secretly i'm wearing pokemon pajamas.)