Conversations - Please love me back
Title: Please love me back
Rating: PG-13
Member/Pairing: Nino/OC
A/N : I'm starting a new series. Purely conversations just to get the juices out of my brain. I might try and make some of the conversations into ongoing stories but for now they will remain as such. Sorry it's kinda hanging. Hope you like it.
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“Please love me… why can’t you just love me?” he pleaded.
He was kneeling in front of me, hands on his knees, eyes red as tears were coursing down his cheeks.
“I want to… but…” I began.
“But what?”
“I can’t…” I replied softly.
“Why? Am I that hard to love back?”
“I can’t not because I don’t want to. I can’ t because I’m not allowed to.” I explained.
“Not allowed? Who did you ask permission from? This is me we’re talking about. My life. My feelings. I am giving you permission to love me.”
I did not answer. I looked at him. I haven’t seen him like this. Not even once has he pleaded before. But here he is pouring his heart out, suppliant that I love him back.
If the situation was different I would have willingly loved him back. But that is not the case.
“Please Jaidee… please… I’m begging you…”
“Kazu…”
“I’ve never felt this way. I’ve never cared for someone this much. Please don’t deny me of this feeling.”
“Kazu… you’re just hurting yourself. You know right from the start that this is wrong. Let go please…” this time it was I who pleaded.
“ Jaidee... Not once did I think that loving you was wrong. Loving you was the best thing that has ever happened to me.”
“ You’re making it hard for me.”
“Then say you love me and everything’s going to be alright.”
“It’s not that easy.”
“Jaidee… it’s not wrong to be selfish sometimes. For once in your life think about yourself, of your feelings, your happiness.”
“Kazu… I can’t… you know I can’t…”
“But you want to right?” he asked
“Yes, I want to… The feeling is too intense to deny… but I really can’t... I don’t know…” I replied.
“Then don’t deny it Jaidee… Love is a feeling you can’t easily brush off. You just have to give in to it.”
“No Kazu… Love is something you give to one person alone… and… I gave that love to someone else a long time ago…” I said trying to avoid his gaze.
He walked up to me, knelt in front and lifted my chin. I was looking into the most expressive eyes I have ever seen. His eyes showed nothing but deep absolute love. Love that I know what was mine if only I would accept it.
“Love is too profound to give to one person. You cannot restrict yourself to loving only one.” He said as he hugged me.
“This is a different kind of love we’re talking about.” I reasoned.
“Is there any other kind of love?” he asked.
“Kazu… this is going no where. Let’s stop this. I beg of you.” I said as I removed myself from his hug and stood up.
“Jaidee… don’t do this…” he said as he grasped my arm.
“Kazu… let go… this way everything would be set right.”
“Why can’t we go on?” he asked.
“Coz if we do, we’ll be hurting a lot of people and our happiness does not equate everybody else’s happiness.” I answered.
“Why can’t we go away? Somewhere, where we can be both ourselves. Somewhere, where we won’t be thinking of what other people would say and feel. Somewhere, where we can freely love.”
“Kazu… I can’t… Please stop…”
He let go of my arm, turned me around to face him and said…
“Alright. I’ll let go since that’s what you want me to do. I’ll leave and not bother you again because you said that’s the right thing to do. But please Jaidee… don’t ask me to stop… don’t ask me to stop loving you… it’s what makes me whole.”
Rating: PG-13
Member/Pairing: Nino/OC
A/N : I'm starting a new series. Purely conversations just to get the juices out of my brain. I might try and make some of the conversations into ongoing stories but for now they will remain as such. Sorry it's kinda hanging. Hope you like it.
_______________________________________________________________________________________
“Please love me… why can’t you just love me?” he pleaded.
He was kneeling in front of me, hands on his knees, eyes red as tears were coursing down his cheeks.
“I want to… but…” I began.
“But what?”
“I can’t…” I replied softly.
“Why? Am I that hard to love back?”
“I can’t not because I don’t want to. I can’ t because I’m not allowed to.” I explained.
“Not allowed? Who did you ask permission from? This is me we’re talking about. My life. My feelings. I am giving you permission to love me.”
I did not answer. I looked at him. I haven’t seen him like this. Not even once has he pleaded before. But here he is pouring his heart out, suppliant that I love him back.
If the situation was different I would have willingly loved him back. But that is not the case.
“Please Jaidee… please… I’m begging you…”
“Kazu…”
“I’ve never felt this way. I’ve never cared for someone this much. Please don’t deny me of this feeling.”
“Kazu… you’re just hurting yourself. You know right from the start that this is wrong. Let go please…” this time it was I who pleaded.
“ Jaidee... Not once did I think that loving you was wrong. Loving you was the best thing that has ever happened to me.”
“ You’re making it hard for me.”
“Then say you love me and everything’s going to be alright.”
“It’s not that easy.”
“Jaidee… it’s not wrong to be selfish sometimes. For once in your life think about yourself, of your feelings, your happiness.”
“Kazu… I can’t… you know I can’t…”
“But you want to right?” he asked
“Yes, I want to… The feeling is too intense to deny… but I really can’t... I don’t know…” I replied.
“Then don’t deny it Jaidee… Love is a feeling you can’t easily brush off. You just have to give in to it.”
“No Kazu… Love is something you give to one person alone… and… I gave that love to someone else a long time ago…” I said trying to avoid his gaze.
He walked up to me, knelt in front and lifted my chin. I was looking into the most expressive eyes I have ever seen. His eyes showed nothing but deep absolute love. Love that I know what was mine if only I would accept it.
“Love is too profound to give to one person. You cannot restrict yourself to loving only one.” He said as he hugged me.
“This is a different kind of love we’re talking about.” I reasoned.
“Is there any other kind of love?” he asked.
“Kazu… this is going no where. Let’s stop this. I beg of you.” I said as I removed myself from his hug and stood up.
“Jaidee… don’t do this…” he said as he grasped my arm.
“Kazu… let go… this way everything would be set right.”
“Why can’t we go on?” he asked.
“Coz if we do, we’ll be hurting a lot of people and our happiness does not equate everybody else’s happiness.” I answered.
“Why can’t we go away? Somewhere, where we can be both ourselves. Somewhere, where we won’t be thinking of what other people would say and feel. Somewhere, where we can freely love.”
“Kazu… I can’t… Please stop…”
He let go of my arm, turned me around to face him and said…
“Alright. I’ll let go since that’s what you want me to do. I’ll leave and not bother you again because you said that’s the right thing to do. But please Jaidee… don’t ask me to stop… don’t ask me to stop loving you… it’s what makes me whole.”