Fic: Just A Boy Without A Clue (PG-13)
Title: Just A Boy Without A Clue
Fandom/Pairing: Kris Allen/Adam Lambert
Rating: PG-13
Wordcount: 1661
Disclaimer: Real people can lead fictional lives too! Song lyrics to Alright With Me are by Kris Allen.
Summary: "I think I should probably tell you that I think you're cute."
Notes: The working title of this fic up until five minutes ago was 'The Hotel Fic.' Written for kradambomb for the ontd_ai last minute post-chat charity drive for Donor's Choose. She gave me the prompt "Kris shows up on Adam's door with a guitar, suitcase, introduces himself as his new roommate. Adam thinks he's cute. They get along, they decide to be roomies in the mansion... and fall in love, of course. xD" This includes... most of that, although possibly not in the order you expected. Thanks to bbluejenn117 and acquiescence_ for betaing.
"So, this isn't something I normally say unless, well, unless I'm trying to accomplish the opposite of what I'm doing here, but I think I should probably tell you that I think you're cute."
Kris is quite content drinking his hotel-breakfast-buffet-quality coffee and wrapping up his breakfast taco just so so he doesn't end up with salsa all over his hand by the third bite when Adam plops himself down in the empty chair next to him and announces this as though the world was about to end.
"Okay."
"No, I don't think you get it. You're exactly my type, in the 'it's distracting' kind of way, and, wow, you've been adorably nice to me when I kind of just figured you would freak out and keep your distance, what with being married and southern and - look, don't hate me, because I know now that you're not like that - but I sort of figured you'd just be one more Christian to look at me like some sort of rescue project and instead you've kind of blown my mind and made me realize how much I tend to judge people."
Adam pauses, and Kris opened his mouth, intending to say something nice and humble and perfect, but Adam cuts him off to continue.
"I wasn't expecting that." Adam bites his lip. "I wasn't expecting you." He swallows. "So I think it's only fair to give you an out at this point, because this is the top thirty-six, but if we end up in the top twelve, well, things have the potential to get really awkward." He takes a deep breath, before letting his final words come out in a rush. "So if you want to keep your distance from me, I'll totally understand, in fact, it might even be better in the long run -- you know, less distracting for both of us -- and if it looks like I'm avoiding you at all, please don't be offended because you should really be flattered, and I'm going to go now, but good luck tonight. I just know you're going to do awesome."
Kris wants to finish chewing the bite of taco in his mouth before answering Adam. His Momma always told him that was the proper thing to do, but his jaw was hanging open with food still in it, and that's kind of rude too. By the time he manages to swallow Adam has already walked away from the table and out of the room.
***
Kris approaches Adam the next afternoon. In a few hours they'll find out whether or not their lives are changing forever, or whatever over-the-top rhetoric Ryan will use. That isn't what has Kris so nervous he can barely squeak out a "hi" when he finally finds Adam, who looks like he was just happy to have found a quiet corner in the midst of all the insanity around them.
For a moment, Kris reconsiders everything, and almost turns and runs away, but then Adam looks up and meets his eyes before letting out a soft "hello" of his own.
So Kris sits down on the floor next to him, and for a moment they just sit in silence together, and even that doesn't feel as unfamiliar or awkward as perhaps it should.
"I'm not going to make it through tonight."
Adam turns to look at him, a sad sort of smile on his face, but Kris continues before Adam can open his mouth to say something reassuring and sweet that will just make him all tongue-tied.
"I hope you don't think this is weird, but I think I got the impression that you would be into it, and I've sort of wanted to try this since before I met you, and yeah, definitely since I met you too, and I figure since I'm going to go home tomorrow, and you're going to be famous and stuff, maybe this is, like, one of those opportunities that's put in front of us that we just have to grab hold of. No regrets. You know what I'm saying?"
"I have no clue what you're saying" -- Adam grabs Kris's arm to stop him from jumping up -- "but I'm pretty sure I want to too."
"Oh." Kris bites his lip and looks up at Adam. "Really?"
"Oh yeah," Adam swallows "I'm almost certain I'd regret saying no to you right now."
Kris decides that Adam must have figured out exactly what he was saying, which makes him smile, because he was never very good at this stuff. This gives him enough confidence to grip the arm Adam was using to hold him in place while using his other hand to trace a finger down Adam's cheek. There's a faint trace of stubble below the silkiness of the powder Kris knows Adam's wearing, and he wasn't expecting that, but it makes him smile even as he leans in for his first kiss with another guy.
Adam's lips are soft, but Kris can feel the muscles in his arm tense up almost immediately, and wrapped in the unfamiliarity of holding onto someone with that much strength while kissing them is the sense that this is not the desired reaction. He pulls back, and sure enough, there's hesitation and just the tiniest bit of fear in Adam's eyes.
"Kris" -- it's as much an exhale as it is a word -- "Kris, oh god, that was your first time doing that, wasn't it?"
So maybe it wasn't perfect, and maybe a chorus of angels hadn't filled the room with song, but Kris hadn't thought it was that bad. He nods anyhow, because it gives him the excuse to look away from Adam.
"Fuck, like I didn't already know not to just agree to anything a cute guy with a southern drawl asks me to do because Kris, I'm sorry, but I can't -- I want to, I really want to -- but I can't do this right now, but you should totally go do that with other guys. Not just any guy, though, make sure you find someone who likes you, and realizes how special you are, and isn't going to take advantage of you. Maybe I could introduce you to some -- crap, no, that's probably not the best idea either, but seriously, if that's who you are, then yeah, you'll regret not exploring that, but I just can't be that guy right now." Adam bangs his head back against the wall and looks away from Kris. "I just don't think I can be that guy right now."
Kris bites his lip to try to figure out what, exactly, he's supposed to say to that, because he feels kind of like the way he felt when Katy told him she loved him right before breaking up with him after graduation. Just when Kris decides he should probably just kiss Adam again -- holding him in place so he can't run away this time -- Adam scrambles to his feed and does just that.
The running away thing, that is.
Not the kissing Kris again thing.
***
Kris is alone in his hotel room, strumming chords that sound an awful lot like Believe when he figures it out.
It's hardly a secret that Kris is slow when it comes to these sorts of things. It took him months to figure out that Katy liked him liked him and years to notice that while not thinking about other girls that way was easy he was failed at keeping his thoughts about guys in the just friends category. It pretty much took his entire life up until three days ago to realize that maybe he should act on those inclinations, just once.
So he thinks he's doing pretty good, all things considered, when he figures out why Adam keeps running away from him after they’ve both made the top twelve. Of course, that was two days ago now, and he's been trying to decide what to do next ever since, but it's not like you can rush these things.
Packing up his bag doesn't take long - he'd barely started unpacking after thinking he was being sent home the other day. Matt's gone, sure, but Kris is pretty sure he's going to be coming back, which means if he's going to do this, he has to do this now.
It's surprisingly easy to get approval from the production crew, but maybe they spent the past three days trying to figure out what to do with Adam now too. Maybe he didn't have to do this right now, but they told him to just leave his roomkey behind and house-keeping would take care of the rest, and then what was he going to do, wait around?
And that's how Kris ends up standing outside Adam's door twenty minutes later, guitar case gripped in one sweaty palm while the other is poised to knock on the door. He pauses for just a moment. Was he supposed to go through a panicking stage, before making this kind of decision? It seems like such a waste of energy. In the end, he concludes that Adam's panicked enough for the both of them.
When Adam opens the door, Kris is able to watch his face flicker through a series of emotions that begins with surprise and ends with resignation, but in the split second between Kris sees enough to confirm his earlier epiphany.
Adam opens his mouth, but before he can launch into yet another speech about why they shouldn't Kris reaches up and pulls Adam's head down and just does because maybe the judges are right -- maybe Kris needs to learn to be that guy who just goes all out for the things he wants, and maybe he can start with Adam, who maybe needs to learn that he doesn't always have to be so dramatic about everything.
Sometimes it's just as simple as singing a song the way you hear it in your heart.
And sometimes it's just about kissing someone who really wants you to kiss back.
***
And I'm knocking on your door
Baby baby, please now
Falling on your floor
Baby baby, please
Fandom/Pairing: Kris Allen/Adam Lambert
Rating: PG-13
Wordcount: 1661
Disclaimer: Real people can lead fictional lives too! Song lyrics to Alright With Me are by Kris Allen.
Summary: "I think I should probably tell you that I think you're cute."
Notes: The working title of this fic up until five minutes ago was 'The Hotel Fic.' Written for kradambomb for the ontd_ai last minute post-chat charity drive for Donor's Choose. She gave me the prompt "Kris shows up on Adam's door with a guitar, suitcase, introduces himself as his new roommate. Adam thinks he's cute. They get along, they decide to be roomies in the mansion... and fall in love, of course. xD" This includes... most of that, although possibly not in the order you expected. Thanks to bbluejenn117 and acquiescence_ for betaing.
"So, this isn't something I normally say unless, well, unless I'm trying to accomplish the opposite of what I'm doing here, but I think I should probably tell you that I think you're cute."
Kris is quite content drinking his hotel-breakfast-buffet-quality coffee and wrapping up his breakfast taco just so so he doesn't end up with salsa all over his hand by the third bite when Adam plops himself down in the empty chair next to him and announces this as though the world was about to end.
"Okay."
"No, I don't think you get it. You're exactly my type, in the 'it's distracting' kind of way, and, wow, you've been adorably nice to me when I kind of just figured you would freak out and keep your distance, what with being married and southern and - look, don't hate me, because I know now that you're not like that - but I sort of figured you'd just be one more Christian to look at me like some sort of rescue project and instead you've kind of blown my mind and made me realize how much I tend to judge people."
Adam pauses, and Kris opened his mouth, intending to say something nice and humble and perfect, but Adam cuts him off to continue.
"I wasn't expecting that." Adam bites his lip. "I wasn't expecting you." He swallows. "So I think it's only fair to give you an out at this point, because this is the top thirty-six, but if we end up in the top twelve, well, things have the potential to get really awkward." He takes a deep breath, before letting his final words come out in a rush. "So if you want to keep your distance from me, I'll totally understand, in fact, it might even be better in the long run -- you know, less distracting for both of us -- and if it looks like I'm avoiding you at all, please don't be offended because you should really be flattered, and I'm going to go now, but good luck tonight. I just know you're going to do awesome."
Kris wants to finish chewing the bite of taco in his mouth before answering Adam. His Momma always told him that was the proper thing to do, but his jaw was hanging open with food still in it, and that's kind of rude too. By the time he manages to swallow Adam has already walked away from the table and out of the room.
***
Kris approaches Adam the next afternoon. In a few hours they'll find out whether or not their lives are changing forever, or whatever over-the-top rhetoric Ryan will use. That isn't what has Kris so nervous he can barely squeak out a "hi" when he finally finds Adam, who looks like he was just happy to have found a quiet corner in the midst of all the insanity around them.
For a moment, Kris reconsiders everything, and almost turns and runs away, but then Adam looks up and meets his eyes before letting out a soft "hello" of his own.
So Kris sits down on the floor next to him, and for a moment they just sit in silence together, and even that doesn't feel as unfamiliar or awkward as perhaps it should.
"I'm not going to make it through tonight."
Adam turns to look at him, a sad sort of smile on his face, but Kris continues before Adam can open his mouth to say something reassuring and sweet that will just make him all tongue-tied.
"I hope you don't think this is weird, but I think I got the impression that you would be into it, and I've sort of wanted to try this since before I met you, and yeah, definitely since I met you too, and I figure since I'm going to go home tomorrow, and you're going to be famous and stuff, maybe this is, like, one of those opportunities that's put in front of us that we just have to grab hold of. No regrets. You know what I'm saying?"
"I have no clue what you're saying" -- Adam grabs Kris's arm to stop him from jumping up -- "but I'm pretty sure I want to too."
"Oh." Kris bites his lip and looks up at Adam. "Really?"
"Oh yeah," Adam swallows "I'm almost certain I'd regret saying no to you right now."
Kris decides that Adam must have figured out exactly what he was saying, which makes him smile, because he was never very good at this stuff. This gives him enough confidence to grip the arm Adam was using to hold him in place while using his other hand to trace a finger down Adam's cheek. There's a faint trace of stubble below the silkiness of the powder Kris knows Adam's wearing, and he wasn't expecting that, but it makes him smile even as he leans in for his first kiss with another guy.
Adam's lips are soft, but Kris can feel the muscles in his arm tense up almost immediately, and wrapped in the unfamiliarity of holding onto someone with that much strength while kissing them is the sense that this is not the desired reaction. He pulls back, and sure enough, there's hesitation and just the tiniest bit of fear in Adam's eyes.
"Kris" -- it's as much an exhale as it is a word -- "Kris, oh god, that was your first time doing that, wasn't it?"
So maybe it wasn't perfect, and maybe a chorus of angels hadn't filled the room with song, but Kris hadn't thought it was that bad. He nods anyhow, because it gives him the excuse to look away from Adam.
"Fuck, like I didn't already know not to just agree to anything a cute guy with a southern drawl asks me to do because Kris, I'm sorry, but I can't -- I want to, I really want to -- but I can't do this right now, but you should totally go do that with other guys. Not just any guy, though, make sure you find someone who likes you, and realizes how special you are, and isn't going to take advantage of you. Maybe I could introduce you to some -- crap, no, that's probably not the best idea either, but seriously, if that's who you are, then yeah, you'll regret not exploring that, but I just can't be that guy right now." Adam bangs his head back against the wall and looks away from Kris. "I just don't think I can be that guy right now."
Kris bites his lip to try to figure out what, exactly, he's supposed to say to that, because he feels kind of like the way he felt when Katy told him she loved him right before breaking up with him after graduation. Just when Kris decides he should probably just kiss Adam again -- holding him in place so he can't run away this time -- Adam scrambles to his feed and does just that.
The running away thing, that is.
Not the kissing Kris again thing.
***
Kris is alone in his hotel room, strumming chords that sound an awful lot like Believe when he figures it out.
It's hardly a secret that Kris is slow when it comes to these sorts of things. It took him months to figure out that Katy liked him liked him and years to notice that while not thinking about other girls that way was easy he was failed at keeping his thoughts about guys in the just friends category. It pretty much took his entire life up until three days ago to realize that maybe he should act on those inclinations, just once.
So he thinks he's doing pretty good, all things considered, when he figures out why Adam keeps running away from him after they’ve both made the top twelve. Of course, that was two days ago now, and he's been trying to decide what to do next ever since, but it's not like you can rush these things.
Packing up his bag doesn't take long - he'd barely started unpacking after thinking he was being sent home the other day. Matt's gone, sure, but Kris is pretty sure he's going to be coming back, which means if he's going to do this, he has to do this now.
It's surprisingly easy to get approval from the production crew, but maybe they spent the past three days trying to figure out what to do with Adam now too. Maybe he didn't have to do this right now, but they told him to just leave his roomkey behind and house-keeping would take care of the rest, and then what was he going to do, wait around?
And that's how Kris ends up standing outside Adam's door twenty minutes later, guitar case gripped in one sweaty palm while the other is poised to knock on the door. He pauses for just a moment. Was he supposed to go through a panicking stage, before making this kind of decision? It seems like such a waste of energy. In the end, he concludes that Adam's panicked enough for the both of them.
When Adam opens the door, Kris is able to watch his face flicker through a series of emotions that begins with surprise and ends with resignation, but in the split second between Kris sees enough to confirm his earlier epiphany.
Adam opens his mouth, but before he can launch into yet another speech about why they shouldn't Kris reaches up and pulls Adam's head down and just does because maybe the judges are right -- maybe Kris needs to learn to be that guy who just goes all out for the things he wants, and maybe he can start with Adam, who maybe needs to learn that he doesn't always have to be so dramatic about everything.
Sometimes it's just as simple as singing a song the way you hear it in your heart.
And sometimes it's just about kissing someone who really wants you to kiss back.
***
And I'm knocking on your door
Baby baby, please now
Falling on your floor
Baby baby, please