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[riverboatsails]

I made this huge-ass entry last night just spilling out all of my insecurities and their possible sources, but then I kind of realized that no one cares and I probably would just make myself look like a whiner

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[riverboatsails]

I didn't say "Hey, I'm a bitch," I said I probably come off as a bitch sometimes because people that I just met don't get my humor. You said that eeeeveryone else but me notices that I am a bitch. Which means that people have talked about me and said "Hey, that girl is bitchy!" which makes me feel not so great and I am kind of curious as to who everyone is, obviously. I'm sure if I hinted that everyone thought that you were a bitch, you'd be upset, too!
And really, I'm sorry that I said that one thing when I was drunk, but I was having some self esteem issues and was really quite aware how much everyone likes you and how beautiful you are, so I said something snappy. I didn't even plan on it. It just came out. It's not like I'm the only person who has ever said a slightly mean thing to you, and it's not like you didn't say something back to hurt me. Same situation on both sides.
And I was pretty sure you did know, because it seemed kind of obvious that it surprised me and that you felt it was awkward.