(no subject)
alrighty. one of those picture category dealie thingys that amused me for a breif period of time.
but anyways, update time. less than a month to go until the semester is over and i once again return home and have to start working. i still can't decide if that's a good thing or a bad thing, cuz on one hand there's coming home, but on the other it's work. so meh, ihave no idea. it's funny how fast time is flying by. as though i'm no longer living day to day, but suddenly week to week and month to month. but all the while the time is still there but it is as though i just pressed fast forward on my own life. and i'm probably not making any sense at all. but whatever, it makes sense to me. but back to my train of thought, wherever it happened to be headed. it's like individual hours and minutes no longer matter any more. yet each of those moments make up the larger picture, so while they are insignificant in one way, they are all that matters in the next. and then i think about one moment. any moment. like the one that passed just now. is that moment gone? did reading that last sentance really have any meaning? or could that time have been better spent talking to a loved one, or doing some enjoyable activity. or is it really all of those mundane moments such as that one that set the standard that allow all of the shining moments to be truelly amazing? for what is amazing? simply a relative term. would one moment that is truelly amazing in my life be considered mundane if it were part of someone else's? for what if the single most amazing instant in my life, whatever that instant may be, in the life of another would just be comsidered the regular ho-hum of boredom? does it matter? does anything matter? for what are we even on a country wide scale? the united states alone has 300 million people. what is a single moment of a single person? or a worldwide scale? 6.5 billion people. each with an incomprehensible amount of moments. yet each of those moments exist on their own. becomes more than just a moment. is transfered to a thought, a memory, a rememberance, a story. will any of my stories be told one day? would i want them to? does what i want make any difference? and to whom? for even all of humanity is still just a speck when compared to the entire universe. but the universe is made up of specks. i know i can't ever even come close to understanding the vastness of the world and all it has to offer. but does that mean i shouldn't try? or should i just try and affect my own portion of this world, to make a small scale difference. because even if this entire planet were to explode, it would still be small scale when looking at even a millionth of what there is to offer. or should i fool myself into thinking that i can influence beyond what is possible? keep up the facade to try and better my surroundings? for it is said that the wings flapping of a butterfly here can cause hurricanes in china. surely the butterfly can't mean to cause a hurricane. or even for that matter understand what a hurricane is. and in it's simple peaceful life has caused harm to thousands through an action that was in no way an immorral and unjust one. i dunno. my thoughts are just wandering today. like just now they drifted off to the half pint of ice cream in the freezer. which triggered my stomach into telling me that i'm hungry. but will it affect things one way or the other whether i climb down from my bed and go down to eat ice cream? will that small amount attract a bug away from getting squashed whose genes are such that it will mutate it's offspring into a species capable of destroying humanity? ok, that was a little rediculous, but it's like flapping wings. but which way of the action would bring the best outcome? there's really no way of knowing. all i can do is guess really. or not even think about it. the butterfly sure as hell wasn't thinking about tornadoes or hurricanes. yet without that tiny breeze from it's wings the chain of events that caused the hurrican would not have happened. so i don't even know. but i really am hungry. so i think i'm going to go eat that ice cream and possibly save the world from future destruction from ant people now. see ya
but anyways, update time. less than a month to go until the semester is over and i once again return home and have to start working. i still can't decide if that's a good thing or a bad thing, cuz on one hand there's coming home, but on the other it's work. so meh, ihave no idea. it's funny how fast time is flying by. as though i'm no longer living day to day, but suddenly week to week and month to month. but all the while the time is still there but it is as though i just pressed fast forward on my own life. and i'm probably not making any sense at all. but whatever, it makes sense to me. but back to my train of thought, wherever it happened to be headed. it's like individual hours and minutes no longer matter any more. yet each of those moments make up the larger picture, so while they are insignificant in one way, they are all that matters in the next. and then i think about one moment. any moment. like the one that passed just now. is that moment gone? did reading that last sentance really have any meaning? or could that time have been better spent talking to a loved one, or doing some enjoyable activity. or is it really all of those mundane moments such as that one that set the standard that allow all of the shining moments to be truelly amazing? for what is amazing? simply a relative term. would one moment that is truelly amazing in my life be considered mundane if it were part of someone else's? for what if the single most amazing instant in my life, whatever that instant may be, in the life of another would just be comsidered the regular ho-hum of boredom? does it matter? does anything matter? for what are we even on a country wide scale? the united states alone has 300 million people. what is a single moment of a single person? or a worldwide scale? 6.5 billion people. each with an incomprehensible amount of moments. yet each of those moments exist on their own. becomes more than just a moment. is transfered to a thought, a memory, a rememberance, a story. will any of my stories be told one day? would i want them to? does what i want make any difference? and to whom? for even all of humanity is still just a speck when compared to the entire universe. but the universe is made up of specks. i know i can't ever even come close to understanding the vastness of the world and all it has to offer. but does that mean i shouldn't try? or should i just try and affect my own portion of this world, to make a small scale difference. because even if this entire planet were to explode, it would still be small scale when looking at even a millionth of what there is to offer. or should i fool myself into thinking that i can influence beyond what is possible? keep up the facade to try and better my surroundings? for it is said that the wings flapping of a butterfly here can cause hurricanes in china. surely the butterfly can't mean to cause a hurricane. or even for that matter understand what a hurricane is. and in it's simple peaceful life has caused harm to thousands through an action that was in no way an immorral and unjust one. i dunno. my thoughts are just wandering today. like just now they drifted off to the half pint of ice cream in the freezer. which triggered my stomach into telling me that i'm hungry. but will it affect things one way or the other whether i climb down from my bed and go down to eat ice cream? will that small amount attract a bug away from getting squashed whose genes are such that it will mutate it's offspring into a species capable of destroying humanity? ok, that was a little rediculous, but it's like flapping wings. but which way of the action would bring the best outcome? there's really no way of knowing. all i can do is guess really. or not even think about it. the butterfly sure as hell wasn't thinking about tornadoes or hurricanes. yet without that tiny breeze from it's wings the chain of events that caused the hurrican would not have happened. so i don't even know. but i really am hungry. so i think i'm going to go eat that ice cream and possibly save the world from future destruction from ant people now. see ya