fic: (The Sun'll Still Shine) But The Night Is On My Mind (EPILOGUE)
Title: (The Sun'll Still Shine) But The Night Is On My Mind
Pairing: Santana Lopez / Brittany Pierce. Side Puck/Santana + Quinn/Santana friendship.
Words: 1000 - [15,600 overall]
Rating: Hard R.
Disclaimer: I don't owns the Glee.
Summary: What Santana wants is a summer to feign blind to the life that’s in shambles around her. If she can avoid Britt (and those damn glee kids), stay inside and occasionally pass and puff with Puck, things’ll be perfect. The summer, of course, has different plans. Title from ATCQ’s “Midnight.”
Read: 1 | 2 | 3 | Epilogue.
She never thought she would be doing this; especially not in front of the glee club. Then again, she never thought she’d be in glee club or that she would consider them family and confide in them when she couldn’t even do it at home.
Regardless of how much she loved singing, Sandy Ryerson had always sort of terrified her. Sure he was gay, but everything about him screamed predator. Period. And there was no way she was going to sign up to be stuck in a room with him every day.
(Her issues with him never stopped her from copping from him though. Chronic Lady helped her do a lot of thinking, okay?)
But when he left and Schue stepped in and tricked Finn into joining glee and Rachel with her optimism and endless talent (and unbelievably long legs) had threatened Quinn and her relationship with Finnept she hadn’t been at all opposed (inwardly) to joining glee. She vocally groaned, complained and dry heaved, but inside, the idea of singing made her happy - even if she had to do it with a bunch of dorks.
But of course she wouldn’t let onto that.
Well, until they had accused her of leaking the set list. And whatever. Maybe it was the best part of her day, but that sort of fucking stopped when Brittany started dating Wheels. Then she just wanted to quit and cry and shit and she didn’t really know why until she was forced to confront her feelings, because Britt wanted her to and she had done whatever Britt wanted since she’d asked to stroke the duck on her shirt in second grade.
Everything except sing a fucking duet about coming to a window - which hit way too close to home because she was always climbing in and out of B’s window.
And she wasn’t fucking gay.
(Well she wasn’t then.
Or she was.
But she didn’t know what to call it.)
She is now and if she’s honest, she’s always known. But it’s taken a lot of tears and her favorite A’s (Amy, Adele and Anita) to come to terms with.
It’s almost funny how easy it slips from her mouth. She’d mulled over a speech for two weeks after discussing with Britt that she wasn’t ready to throw on a rainbow t-shirt and parade around Lima, but she could tell her friends. Brittany grinned too hard at that and she moved to clarify that she was referring to Puck and Quinn (which Brittany pointed out didn’t count, at all.) Brittany made it clear that friends meant glee.
It’s not even almost funny, it is. Of all the places and times to come out, to actually say “I’m gay” out loud it’s in the middle of a New Direction’s Taboo night (third of the summer, how do they keep getting her here?) She had an actual speech that said something sappy about them being sort of awesome or at least tolerable but she forgets all that when the urge to just do it comes over.
“I’m gay,” she says in the middle of a break from the game. Everyone’s trading insults, Mercedes and Kurt are harmonizing theirs. Her hand squeezes around the neck of the Mike’s Hard Lemonade in her hand.
It’s suddenly quiet, too quiet and she wonders if she can apparate if she tries hard enough. They’re all just kind of staring at her (Finn is gaping and Kurt is smiling) like they’re waiting for her to say more, but really that’s all she has.
“I lost my virginity to a lesbian,” Finn says, breaking the silence. Eleven sets of eyes shoot in his direction and then ten go back to Santana.
“You’re lucky you lost your virginity at all,” she quips, sipping her drink. Her eyes scan the room again and she sighs, “I dunno, I just felt like I should tell you guys. You’re like … fam - friends or something.”
It’s still quiet.
“Can someone say something? Seriously.”
“We sort of knew,” Rachel says softly, placing a hand on Santana’s knee. “But I think I can speak for all of us (“You usually do,” Quinn hisses and Santana thought her haircut wasn’t the only gay thing about her, but whatever) when I say that we’re proud of you and glad that you consider us worthy enough of your trust to be privileged to such important information. I know that this hasn’t been easy for you. I’m also positive that we are all more than ready to support you in any way necessary,” she pauses but doesn’t actually take a breath, “And the verse you wrote for Light Up The World? Well, that was you coming out, honestly. It was pretty obvious at that point. And Landslide? Sapphic, too.”
Santana rolls her eyes, but it’s the best way she can say thanks without saying something stupidly emotional or … nice.
“Dude, I’m finally a lesbro,” Puck says and her brows furrow.
“Are you serious? That’s what you have to say?”
“Fuck yeah, I’ve like always wanted to be one.”
Brittany squeezes her hand and then kisses the inside of her wrist and she bites back the insult at the tip of her tongue.
“Since you’ve pulled your head out of your ass,” Puck says, “You two are together now, right?”
She flips him the bird for the first comment and then nods with grin, “Yeah. She’s my girl - so stop looking down her shirt. I’m not blind,” she says slugging him.
They ease right back into a game after she answers a few questions that actually don’t make her chest tight. They get pretty buzzed and end up singing songs about friendship and shit, which would normally make her sick to her stomach, but doesn’t.
The thought that any of this being outside the norm never crosses her mind, because this, this is her new normal.
Pairing: Santana Lopez / Brittany Pierce. Side Puck/Santana + Quinn/Santana friendship.
Words: 1000 - [15,600 overall]
Rating: Hard R.
Disclaimer: I don't owns the Glee.
Summary: What Santana wants is a summer to feign blind to the life that’s in shambles around her. If she can avoid Britt (and those damn glee kids), stay inside and occasionally pass and puff with Puck, things’ll be perfect. The summer, of course, has different plans. Title from ATCQ’s “Midnight.”
Read: 1 | 2 | 3 | Epilogue.
She never thought she would be doing this; especially not in front of the glee club. Then again, she never thought she’d be in glee club or that she would consider them family and confide in them when she couldn’t even do it at home.
Regardless of how much she loved singing, Sandy Ryerson had always sort of terrified her. Sure he was gay, but everything about him screamed predator. Period. And there was no way she was going to sign up to be stuck in a room with him every day.
(Her issues with him never stopped her from copping from him though. Chronic Lady helped her do a lot of thinking, okay?)
But when he left and Schue stepped in and tricked Finn into joining glee and Rachel with her optimism and endless talent (and unbelievably long legs) had threatened Quinn and her relationship with Finnept she hadn’t been at all opposed (inwardly) to joining glee. She vocally groaned, complained and dry heaved, but inside, the idea of singing made her happy - even if she had to do it with a bunch of dorks.
But of course she wouldn’t let onto that.
Well, until they had accused her of leaking the set list. And whatever. Maybe it was the best part of her day, but that sort of fucking stopped when Brittany started dating Wheels. Then she just wanted to quit and cry and shit and she didn’t really know why until she was forced to confront her feelings, because Britt wanted her to and she had done whatever Britt wanted since she’d asked to stroke the duck on her shirt in second grade.
Everything except sing a fucking duet about coming to a window - which hit way too close to home because she was always climbing in and out of B’s window.
And she wasn’t fucking gay.
(Well she wasn’t then.
Or she was.
But she didn’t know what to call it.)
She is now and if she’s honest, she’s always known. But it’s taken a lot of tears and her favorite A’s (Amy, Adele and Anita) to come to terms with.
It’s almost funny how easy it slips from her mouth. She’d mulled over a speech for two weeks after discussing with Britt that she wasn’t ready to throw on a rainbow t-shirt and parade around Lima, but she could tell her friends. Brittany grinned too hard at that and she moved to clarify that she was referring to Puck and Quinn (which Brittany pointed out didn’t count, at all.) Brittany made it clear that friends meant glee.
It’s not even almost funny, it is. Of all the places and times to come out, to actually say “I’m gay” out loud it’s in the middle of a New Direction’s Taboo night (third of the summer, how do they keep getting her here?) She had an actual speech that said something sappy about them being sort of awesome or at least tolerable but she forgets all that when the urge to just do it comes over.
“I’m gay,” she says in the middle of a break from the game. Everyone’s trading insults, Mercedes and Kurt are harmonizing theirs. Her hand squeezes around the neck of the Mike’s Hard Lemonade in her hand.
It’s suddenly quiet, too quiet and she wonders if she can apparate if she tries hard enough. They’re all just kind of staring at her (Finn is gaping and Kurt is smiling) like they’re waiting for her to say more, but really that’s all she has.
“I lost my virginity to a lesbian,” Finn says, breaking the silence. Eleven sets of eyes shoot in his direction and then ten go back to Santana.
“You’re lucky you lost your virginity at all,” she quips, sipping her drink. Her eyes scan the room again and she sighs, “I dunno, I just felt like I should tell you guys. You’re like … fam - friends or something.”
It’s still quiet.
“Can someone say something? Seriously.”
“We sort of knew,” Rachel says softly, placing a hand on Santana’s knee. “But I think I can speak for all of us (“You usually do,” Quinn hisses and Santana thought her haircut wasn’t the only gay thing about her, but whatever) when I say that we’re proud of you and glad that you consider us worthy enough of your trust to be privileged to such important information. I know that this hasn’t been easy for you. I’m also positive that we are all more than ready to support you in any way necessary,” she pauses but doesn’t actually take a breath, “And the verse you wrote for Light Up The World? Well, that was you coming out, honestly. It was pretty obvious at that point. And Landslide? Sapphic, too.”
Santana rolls her eyes, but it’s the best way she can say thanks without saying something stupidly emotional or … nice.
“Dude, I’m finally a lesbro,” Puck says and her brows furrow.
“Are you serious? That’s what you have to say?”
“Fuck yeah, I’ve like always wanted to be one.”
Brittany squeezes her hand and then kisses the inside of her wrist and she bites back the insult at the tip of her tongue.
“Since you’ve pulled your head out of your ass,” Puck says, “You two are together now, right?”
She flips him the bird for the first comment and then nods with grin, “Yeah. She’s my girl - so stop looking down her shirt. I’m not blind,” she says slugging him.
They ease right back into a game after she answers a few questions that actually don’t make her chest tight. They get pretty buzzed and end up singing songs about friendship and shit, which would normally make her sick to her stomach, but doesn’t.
The thought that any of this being outside the norm never crosses her mind, because this, this is her new normal.