Things I'm heartsick about

Jul 30, 2009 01:39

I'm up in the middle of the night again, feeling upset. ( Read more... )

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anonymous July 30 2009, 08:01:45 UTC
:( I'm so sorry. It's so hard to *finally* know what you want... and not be in a position to really live it. I hope it gets better.

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tikizeekbaby July 30 2009, 08:02:21 UTC
Oh good grief, that was me :).

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rokica July 31 2009, 08:17:15 UTC
:)

It's actually not that I'm not in a position to live what I want. I am totally in a place where I'm doing what I love 90% of the time. I attend births (home and hospital), I'm (sort of) apprenticed to a midwife, I'm doing breastfeeding consultation at a hospital under a doctor, I'm a part of several groups for doulas that regularly get together and get good work done. So it's all good in that regard.

There is no clear-cut path to becoming a direct entry midwife in this country, mainly because they do not recognize direct entry midwives, and homebirth is not regulated, which can make it potentially dangerous for people who attend women at home. I know this, and I've sort of made my peace with it.

Ideally, I'd be in a country where being apprenticed to a home birth midwife was less legally fraught with problems, but I'm still attending births and I'm still learning, which is what's most important to me.

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terrible_mother August 3 2009, 19:04:44 UTC
Oh that pool story scares me. but actually the fact that a kid falls in amongst 200 people is not surprising. That's how it usually happens, I hear. Everyone thinks someone else is watching the kid, when in fact nobody is. I am a very laid back mom, but I do worry increasingly as they get older. I'm sorry you are having trouble sleeping, but I'm impressed that you've decided to take on a career in childbirth. Good for you.

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