Musice Drabble Meme: Evil Awesome Edition
I recently made a playlist of villain songs (most for disney movies and other assorted musicals) and in an effort to distract myself from dwelling on unpleasant things, I've decided to do the usually Music Drabble Meme using only songs from my Evil Awesome playlist. Wish me luck.
1. Fairy Godmother Song - Shrek 2
Lady Ramkin blew her nose one last time after getting ready for bed. She'd hardly cried after Captain Vimes left but she couldn't shake the stuffy nose feeling. She sat on her bed and the world filled with bubbles and glitter and the tinkling of tiny bells. A woman that looked the same age as Sybil and dressed like the more ornamental types of cake materialized in her room. Good gods, she even has tiny wings pinned to her back...
"Don't weep, child. For your fairy godmother has appeared and with my magic w-"
"Do you have any idea how late you are?" Lady Ramkin asked while trying not to laugh.
2. Slipping - Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog
"It's better to be at an evil man's mercy." Vimes reminded Carrot.
Carrot smiled, knowing that Vimes would eventually elaborate on his point. Vimes obliged by adding,
"It's the gloating. Evil men like to gloat, they like to watch you squirm and anything that buys you time to arrest him, is a good thing."
"So... only evil men like to gloat when they have someone at their mercy?"
"Exactly."
Vimes started to count. Five seconds later, Carrot said,
"You get a bit... chatty after an arrest, sir."
3. I Can't Decide - Scissor Sisters
"But why you...?" Captain Vimes asked helplessly.
If Lady Sybil Ramking hadn't been chained to a lump of cement, she would have throttled the man. Why.... why was he so... dumb?! It's like he enjoyed not noticing how she... Maybe it was her fault... she'd been too subtle but... She had to think fast. Any second now, he'd remember that little bit of dragon lore and it would add that much more awkward to all their encounters.
"Captain Vimes, I must insist that put that cleaver to its proper use." She said regally.
"Ah right." He said.
He was so adorable. That's what made it so hard to stay angry at him, nevermind kill him.
4. Friends on the Other Side - The Princess and the Frog
Vimes would never admit it, on pain of death or even to his closest confidant, but having non-humans in the Watch was... really cool. Not in a 'equal opportunity is cool' but in a 'one of my officers can tear a man's leg off with her teeth if she wanted' sort of cool. There was some childish pleasure in watching Angua in her wolf form pounce on a criminal. Or seeing Sally disappear into a cloud of bats or watching (from a safe distance) a dwarf running in full armor, his battle axe held high and letting out a Dwarfish war yodel. There were times when a tiny and much younger part of Vimes would jump and scream, 'that was AWESOME!'
5. When You're Evil - Voltaire
"You're working him much to hard." Sybil informed Lord Vetinari.
"It was my understanding that Vimes set his own hours." He answered then added, "And I heard he rather enjoys how he works."
"And it's always a comfort to know that you can just snap your fingers and Sam will appear."
Vetinari raised an eyebrow. Sybil wasn't being entirely serious. They both knew that but they also both knew that if he thought Vetinari really needed him, Vimes would just be there. And he'd be equally happy catching an ordinary purse snatcher as he would uncovering a conspiracy. He was simply, a guard that not only does his job but does it happily.
"There's nothing we can really do about him, is there?" She asked smiling faintly.
"Not that I've ever found." Vetinari agreed. "Even if neither I nor Ankh-Morpork existed, Vimes would still just go on... coppering."
6. Mother Knows Best (Reprise) - Tangled
Vimes came home and found his wife sitting in the drawing room. A ball of pale blue yarn rested awkwardly on her pregnant belly. He suddenly wished he could take a scrubbing brush to the inside of his brain. It wasn't enough trying not to remember the more gruesome crimes anymore. Anything some snotty teenager was caught acting like a fool, he just wanted to scream. What the hell was he supposed to do? How was he supposed to protect the baby from the whole damned world? From itself? Whenever Sybil asked him if he wanted to say something to the baby, Vimes had to bite his tongue. He only ever wanted to tell it to just stay inside.
7. Live - Paul and Storm
Ankh-Morpork was having a proper thunderstorm. Or as Igor called it, thunderthorm. It was a slow night, which was why Vimes was the one knocking on the door to this little workshop on his way home. There was no answer. He knocked again. He knew there was someone home. He'd heard movement. What's more, he'd heard laughter. The sort that every Igor longed for in a master. He sighed wearily. This was going to be so... awkward.
"Open up in the name of the Law!" He bellowed, pointing on the door for punctuation.
He was faintly aware of someone scurrying out the back door. He only relaxed when he heard someone trip and say 'thit.'.
"All right," Vimes said, "I'm coming in!"
The door opened suddenly. A wild eyed young man answered.
"I'm not ze monster here!" He cried out, "An my creation is not..."
"Sir, sir, please." Vimes said in his 'please remain calm' voice, he couldn't stop himself glancing at the makeshift gurney... with something covered in a sheet.
"I'm only here because your neighbors have been complaining about the noise."
"I'M A MAN OF SC- vhat?"
Vimes pulled out his notebook and said,
"They say 'we don't care if he'll show zem, he'll show zem all or who called him mad. We just want him to shut the hell up. Some of us work in the morning'."
8. Modred's Lullaby - Heather Dale
Vimes was giving a history lesson to Sybil's belly. It was her own fault, she'd encouraged him to talk to the baby while still in the womb but...
"And that's why Ankh-Morpork doesn't have kings." He said in the tone people use when they tell children cute little myths about the seasons or weather.
Sybil tried not to stare. Or feel concerned. Her husband was instilling a mistrust of royalty into their child from the womb. Was this just a random topic that popped into his head or was he going to sing their baby lullabies about the evils of monarchy? If he did he'd have a devil of a time trying to find a rhyme for 'beheaded'. Oh gods, what if this was a Vimes tradition? Actually, that would explain a lot.
9. Ghost Riders in the Storm - Spiderbait
It had started out as a quiet night patrol. Then Vimes heard it. The beating of dozens of hooves over a road that he knew was far too narrow to accomodate them all. There was the barking and howling of hunting dogs. Anyone inside would be slamming their shutters closred right now and pulling the covers over their heads. Vimes turned around slowly. Several ghostly figures, all on ethereal looking horses moved down the street at full gallop. Skeletal dogs bounded behind them. Vimes looked at his hourglass and then turned his eyes stoically towards the approaching crowd. Slowly, he raised his right hand.
"Stop in the name of the law!" He roared as while horses and hounds and vaguely humanoid things kept going.
He lowered his hand again and groaned. They never stopped. And they always made such a racket when they came 'round. He didn't know what they were except a damn nuisance.
10. My Freeze Ray - Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog
Sybil had old school chums all over the Disc.
"If you wanted you could rule the world." Vimes joked.Sybil just smiled and didn't comment. She and her chums were just that. Chums and all their husbands just happened to be influencial in their own little ways. All. Their. Husbands. Even Sybil's husband with his common heritage and insignificant occupation... The moment he put a wedding ring on Sybil's finger, he shot up in the world. He was now the second most powerful man of the most powerful city on the Disc. If that were the case, Sybil was well on her way to ruling the world. And no one, not even her husband, had any idea. How... interesting.
I think I just implied that Sybil is an evil mastermind. Awesome.
1. Fairy Godmother Song - Shrek 2
Lady Ramkin blew her nose one last time after getting ready for bed. She'd hardly cried after Captain Vimes left but she couldn't shake the stuffy nose feeling. She sat on her bed and the world filled with bubbles and glitter and the tinkling of tiny bells. A woman that looked the same age as Sybil and dressed like the more ornamental types of cake materialized in her room. Good gods, she even has tiny wings pinned to her back...
"Don't weep, child. For your fairy godmother has appeared and with my magic w-"
"Do you have any idea how late you are?" Lady Ramkin asked while trying not to laugh.
2. Slipping - Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog
"It's better to be at an evil man's mercy." Vimes reminded Carrot.
Carrot smiled, knowing that Vimes would eventually elaborate on his point. Vimes obliged by adding,
"It's the gloating. Evil men like to gloat, they like to watch you squirm and anything that buys you time to arrest him, is a good thing."
"So... only evil men like to gloat when they have someone at their mercy?"
"Exactly."
Vimes started to count. Five seconds later, Carrot said,
"You get a bit... chatty after an arrest, sir."
3. I Can't Decide - Scissor Sisters
"But why you...?" Captain Vimes asked helplessly.
If Lady Sybil Ramking hadn't been chained to a lump of cement, she would have throttled the man. Why.... why was he so... dumb?! It's like he enjoyed not noticing how she... Maybe it was her fault... she'd been too subtle but... She had to think fast. Any second now, he'd remember that little bit of dragon lore and it would add that much more awkward to all their encounters.
"Captain Vimes, I must insist that put that cleaver to its proper use." She said regally.
"Ah right." He said.
He was so adorable. That's what made it so hard to stay angry at him, nevermind kill him.
4. Friends on the Other Side - The Princess and the Frog
Vimes would never admit it, on pain of death or even to his closest confidant, but having non-humans in the Watch was... really cool. Not in a 'equal opportunity is cool' but in a 'one of my officers can tear a man's leg off with her teeth if she wanted' sort of cool. There was some childish pleasure in watching Angua in her wolf form pounce on a criminal. Or seeing Sally disappear into a cloud of bats or watching (from a safe distance) a dwarf running in full armor, his battle axe held high and letting out a Dwarfish war yodel. There were times when a tiny and much younger part of Vimes would jump and scream, 'that was AWESOME!'
5. When You're Evil - Voltaire
"You're working him much to hard." Sybil informed Lord Vetinari.
"It was my understanding that Vimes set his own hours." He answered then added, "And I heard he rather enjoys how he works."
"And it's always a comfort to know that you can just snap your fingers and Sam will appear."
Vetinari raised an eyebrow. Sybil wasn't being entirely serious. They both knew that but they also both knew that if he thought Vetinari really needed him, Vimes would just be there. And he'd be equally happy catching an ordinary purse snatcher as he would uncovering a conspiracy. He was simply, a guard that not only does his job but does it happily.
"There's nothing we can really do about him, is there?" She asked smiling faintly.
"Not that I've ever found." Vetinari agreed. "Even if neither I nor Ankh-Morpork existed, Vimes would still just go on... coppering."
6. Mother Knows Best (Reprise) - Tangled
Vimes came home and found his wife sitting in the drawing room. A ball of pale blue yarn rested awkwardly on her pregnant belly. He suddenly wished he could take a scrubbing brush to the inside of his brain. It wasn't enough trying not to remember the more gruesome crimes anymore. Anything some snotty teenager was caught acting like a fool, he just wanted to scream. What the hell was he supposed to do? How was he supposed to protect the baby from the whole damned world? From itself? Whenever Sybil asked him if he wanted to say something to the baby, Vimes had to bite his tongue. He only ever wanted to tell it to just stay inside.
7. Live - Paul and Storm
Ankh-Morpork was having a proper thunderstorm. Or as Igor called it, thunderthorm. It was a slow night, which was why Vimes was the one knocking on the door to this little workshop on his way home. There was no answer. He knocked again. He knew there was someone home. He'd heard movement. What's more, he'd heard laughter. The sort that every Igor longed for in a master. He sighed wearily. This was going to be so... awkward.
"Open up in the name of the Law!" He bellowed, pointing on the door for punctuation.
He was faintly aware of someone scurrying out the back door. He only relaxed when he heard someone trip and say 'thit.'.
"All right," Vimes said, "I'm coming in!"
The door opened suddenly. A wild eyed young man answered.
"I'm not ze monster here!" He cried out, "An my creation is not..."
"Sir, sir, please." Vimes said in his 'please remain calm' voice, he couldn't stop himself glancing at the makeshift gurney... with something covered in a sheet.
"I'm only here because your neighbors have been complaining about the noise."
"I'M A MAN OF SC- vhat?"
Vimes pulled out his notebook and said,
"They say 'we don't care if he'll show zem, he'll show zem all or who called him mad. We just want him to shut the hell up. Some of us work in the morning'."
8. Modred's Lullaby - Heather Dale
Vimes was giving a history lesson to Sybil's belly. It was her own fault, she'd encouraged him to talk to the baby while still in the womb but...
"And that's why Ankh-Morpork doesn't have kings." He said in the tone people use when they tell children cute little myths about the seasons or weather.
Sybil tried not to stare. Or feel concerned. Her husband was instilling a mistrust of royalty into their child from the womb. Was this just a random topic that popped into his head or was he going to sing their baby lullabies about the evils of monarchy? If he did he'd have a devil of a time trying to find a rhyme for 'beheaded'. Oh gods, what if this was a Vimes tradition? Actually, that would explain a lot.
9. Ghost Riders in the Storm - Spiderbait
It had started out as a quiet night patrol. Then Vimes heard it. The beating of dozens of hooves over a road that he knew was far too narrow to accomodate them all. There was the barking and howling of hunting dogs. Anyone inside would be slamming their shutters closred right now and pulling the covers over their heads. Vimes turned around slowly. Several ghostly figures, all on ethereal looking horses moved down the street at full gallop. Skeletal dogs bounded behind them. Vimes looked at his hourglass and then turned his eyes stoically towards the approaching crowd. Slowly, he raised his right hand.
"Stop in the name of the law!" He roared as while horses and hounds and vaguely humanoid things kept going.
He lowered his hand again and groaned. They never stopped. And they always made such a racket when they came 'round. He didn't know what they were except a damn nuisance.
10. My Freeze Ray - Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog
Sybil had old school chums all over the Disc.
"If you wanted you could rule the world." Vimes joked.Sybil just smiled and didn't comment. She and her chums were just that. Chums and all their husbands just happened to be influencial in their own little ways. All. Their. Husbands. Even Sybil's husband with his common heritage and insignificant occupation... The moment he put a wedding ring on Sybil's finger, he shot up in the world. He was now the second most powerful man of the most powerful city on the Disc. If that were the case, Sybil was well on her way to ruling the world. And no one, not even her husband, had any idea. How... interesting.
I think I just implied that Sybil is an evil mastermind. Awesome.