if i talked about life, tom would get mad because i would give all the details

[rosenbaum]

The one time I didn't utilize the services of a hooker, I didn't end up in a Ramada Inn with my hands tied to the bedposts with my socks, but if I had spent money on this hooker, I probably did end up in the neighborhood pool of one of those subdivisions comprised of boxy little houses that all look the same. It could have happened in late October

Comments

[l_lohan]

UNGGGHHHHHHHHHH NANANANA

[rosenbaum]

LEAVE A COHERENT COMMENT PLZ

[l_lohan]

"Make 'Em Say Uhh" Master P right?

[rosenbaum]

I forgot I even mentioned that in this post, I lose.

[jamesmcav]

That Starship song is amazing, I don't care what anybody says.

[rosenbaum]

First of all, what are your keywords. Secondly, while I concede that it maybe shouldn't be considered the worst song of all time, it really does belong on this list. But then again, I love Wang Chung, so what do I know.

[jamesmcav]

Ahaha, it's the title of an episode of Coupling, I fucking hate keywords and just started finding whatever I could to keyword with. I don't appreciate your judgment on the matter! Well, I believe Achy Breaky Heart is much much worse than Starship. That song makes me want to shoot myself in the face.

[rosenbaum]

Oh, I've seen that show. I was just curious, because I was definitely going to psychoanalyze it with people later. No hate here. I think you're right. And Limp Bizkit is possibly even worse than that, so I don't know why this list is in the order that it's in.

[danielafreitas]

If you hadn't written this under the influence I would have been disappointed.

[rosenbaum]

I just reread that sentence and I realized there's never a time when I'm not under the influence, so there is no reason why this shouldn't be more coherent. Anyway, three things about yourself, please. I want to guess your lie.

[danielafreitas]

1. I have a fascination with all things cast as evil: vampires, villains, greed, sin...

2. I'm seduced by beauty.

3. I like the feeling that comes from being out of control, spontaneity, danger, it's almost an addiction.

[rosenbaum]

The first one sounds made up, which means it's probably true. Three sounds like something I could say about myself, so I'm guessing that the second one is the lie. Yes or no?

[gwynethpaltrow]

I'm going to leave a better comment in the morning, but for now, let me just say that I am v., v. disappointed you changed your icon.

[rosenbaum]

I changed it a few times. Which one did I use that you like? The fake moustache one? I'll change it back right now because I was born to make you happy, like the Britney song.

[gwynethpaltrow]

The pornstache one, yes! You put the boom boom into my heart, you know.

[rosenbaum]

I did it all for you, G. Pal. I sincerely hope that you will consider my proposal of marriage now, because all I really want is to hold you tight, treat you right, be with you day and night.

[evangelinelilly]

I feel like I should be horrified or something but this is just about the best thing my friends page has seen in a while and I'm not really sure why. And I agree with McAvoy. That Starship song is amazing!

[rosenbaum]

Thank you for saying so! I feel like it's a huge downgrade after my update on Digital Underground, to be honest with you. I've had it on repeat for the last hour and I didn't even realize it. I'm finding it less and less awful all the time. So three things about yourself, Evangeline. I want to guess the lie.

[evangelinelilly]

Clearly I've been missing out by not having you added! I should go back and read that update. 3 things? My brain has been switched off for the night and I can barely think of one so these will be lame: 1. I don't know how to change a flat tire, 2. I don't really like ketchup and 3. I smoke cigars. Your turn?

[rosenbaum]

You really should, because I'm extremely proud of that one and if all the links are dead, I'll upload every Digital Underground song I have, just for you. You're not doing the thing that people normally do in which they figure out two things about themselves that sound totally crazy and they make the lie really bland. You strike me as the kind of chick that can change a tire and enjoy a good stogie, so I'm going to go for number two here. Man, I'm always crap about coming up with things for myself.