Drabble: I know your secret... Luffy/Crocodile, PG13
Luffy/Crocodile crack!drabble from ages ago, found in back of a notebook this morning.
"I know your secret, Croc!" Straw Hat Luffy announced, bouncing up from nowhere to where Crocodile was sitting alone on the deck of their stolen ship. The former shichibukai glared up at the voice, and flinched when he found the large blank discs of the ridiculous youth's eyes inches from his as Straw Hat leaned in close. "Iva-chan told me." He licked his lips with a loud smack and looked... worryingly hungry.
"I don't believe you," Crocodile snarled, trying to shove the brat away, though that only made his head bounce back and forth on his rubber neck until Luffy put both hands up to it to stop it. The idiot was lying. Iva-chan had sworn secrecy. Iva wouldn't... Ivankov... God damn it. Crocodile changed tack and lifted the tip of his hook to Straw Hat's eye. "Pass that information along to anyone and I'll maim you permanently, boy."
Straw Hat blinked and, obliviously, nearly put himself out one eyelid anyway. Crocodile warily reversed the hook a full inch because he didn't particularly want to injure the other devil fruit user and disturb their tentative alliance until it suited him to do so. Luffy sat back and giggled. The sound was far more evil than any the altruistic pirate reasonably ought to produce. "Why would I tell anyone else the secret when it's so much more fun to use it myself?"
Crocodile irritably started to growl, "What on earth are you talking ab--" but found himself gulping short the end of the question as Straw Hat closed a hand around his wrist and pushed until the hook was tilted back against his shoulder. "What-- Wait!"
"Why?" Luffy asked with apparently genuine puzzlement, then curled the fingers of his other hand in the waistband of Crocodile's trousers, climbed on top of him and pushed him over. "I told you, I know, so it's no use trying to hide it."
"You surely don't intend-- No!" Crocodile spluttered. "You can't do this! I won't-- it's impossible--! Not YOU...! S-s-stop!" Unable to help himself, though, he could already feel his ordinarily commanding body language changing, the blush creeping over his face, his muscles turning to water, forcing him to shrink bashfully and submit as Straw Hat Luffy slid his hands to parts that hadn't been touched that way in too long.
"I know," Luffy purred in his ear, "that you're an uke."
Crocodile sobbed aloud. His secret was out. He was completely at Straw Hat's mercy now...
"I know your secret, Croc!" Straw Hat Luffy announced, bouncing up from nowhere to where Crocodile was sitting alone on the deck of their stolen ship. The former shichibukai glared up at the voice, and flinched when he found the large blank discs of the ridiculous youth's eyes inches from his as Straw Hat leaned in close. "Iva-chan told me." He licked his lips with a loud smack and looked... worryingly hungry.
"I don't believe you," Crocodile snarled, trying to shove the brat away, though that only made his head bounce back and forth on his rubber neck until Luffy put both hands up to it to stop it. The idiot was lying. Iva-chan had sworn secrecy. Iva wouldn't... Ivankov... God damn it. Crocodile changed tack and lifted the tip of his hook to Straw Hat's eye. "Pass that information along to anyone and I'll maim you permanently, boy."
Straw Hat blinked and, obliviously, nearly put himself out one eyelid anyway. Crocodile warily reversed the hook a full inch because he didn't particularly want to injure the other devil fruit user and disturb their tentative alliance until it suited him to do so. Luffy sat back and giggled. The sound was far more evil than any the altruistic pirate reasonably ought to produce. "Why would I tell anyone else the secret when it's so much more fun to use it myself?"
Crocodile irritably started to growl, "What on earth are you talking ab--" but found himself gulping short the end of the question as Straw Hat closed a hand around his wrist and pushed until the hook was tilted back against his shoulder. "What-- Wait!"
"Why?" Luffy asked with apparently genuine puzzlement, then curled the fingers of his other hand in the waistband of Crocodile's trousers, climbed on top of him and pushed him over. "I told you, I know, so it's no use trying to hide it."
"You surely don't intend-- No!" Crocodile spluttered. "You can't do this! I won't-- it's impossible--! Not YOU...! S-s-stop!" Unable to help himself, though, he could already feel his ordinarily commanding body language changing, the blush creeping over his face, his muscles turning to water, forcing him to shrink bashfully and submit as Straw Hat Luffy slid his hands to parts that hadn't been touched that way in too long.
"I know," Luffy purred in his ear, "that you're an uke."
Crocodile sobbed aloud. His secret was out. He was completely at Straw Hat's mercy now...