Comments | rostin79: time for an update

rostin79

time for an update

Mar 12, 2009 11:37

it's been awhile, and it's been some interesting winter. a little bit of a sad one, and I’m happy to see the sun coming out and a bit of my mood going toward the positive. I've actually been quite frustrated with my work insurance. I have the benefit of some counseling, which I've actively sought out, only to be rejected so far by 3 doctors ( Read more... )

mind

Comments 6

mike123456 March 12 2009, 19:16:38 UTC

i think you need to do what feels right for you. just because a certain type of relationship (like an open situation) is ideal to someone else, doesn't mean it would work for you or that your feelings about a situation are invalid.

rostin79 March 12 2009, 19:31:51 UTC

that's also what i'm keeping in mind. what works for me and what i feel comfortable with, and it was part of the discussion last night. All I can come to for the logical mind of me (and it's only for me) is that if an open relationship situation doesn't work for me, why would it not work? What about it wouldn't be right? And am I losing something if that does happen. I don't have any good answers for why it would be bad, other than some sort of gut feeling of worry about it. That something will change and not for the better. But I find even that to not be a valid answer, because that could happen with anything. I feel like all my feelings of unease seem to come from some thought of how it should be, or something ( ... )

mike123456 March 12 2009, 19:38:34 UTC

thanks jeff..i just hate to see you beating yourself up :) i do really admire that you go out of your way to make other people happy and wouldn't want to get in the way of someone else's happiness.

i guess my advice in terms of trying to figure out why you feel a certain way is to remember that not all emotions can be totally logical. i think you do need to go with your gut feeling - there's obviously something that is making you feel uncomfortable, and it's not necessarily an insecurity.

rostin79 March 12 2009, 20:05:40 UTC

you bring up a good point. "out of the way to make others happy." that's one area i'm trying to see something about. it's nice to do, but not at the expense of myself.

And yeah, i'm trying to read my gut, and see what's really there, and figure it out. i guess that's part of life, right?

Thread 5

thespos March 13 2009, 05:54:07 UTC

I worked for a subsidiary of United Health Care for almost six years - and they do, indeed, suck. I'm sorry you're going through such issues with them. They treat their employees even worse when it comes to insurance, giving the minimum they can get away with, and the benefits declined every year.

Anyway...

I don't have any words of advice, other than what has already been said - which is not to be so hard on yourself. I think your reservations and issues here are normal, actually, and realizing that you may want to express them in a different way or resolve them in a different way is a really good thing.