I' ve been waiting for you ( Read more... )

i wish the world was flat like the old days...

411:"Thank you for calling Verizon 411 connect. What city and state please?
Me: Biloxi, Mississippi
411: Hold one second.....We are sorry, this city does not exsist anymore...

( Read more... )

so yeah, i haven't updated since the whole marine corps boot camp thing. It was a lot of fun, JUST LIKE A SUMMER CAMP!!! Sand fleas rock. Especially sand flea funerals. Parris island is the place to be. Drill instructors are very helpfull. Physical and martial arts training rocks. The food was great (no, really it was). So much to write, but no ( Read more... )

Series Gunery Sargent: Recruit "so and so" why the fuck did you carry your alice pack all the way up stairs and leave your rifle with your friend?

Recruit: (without missing a beat) THIS RECUIT IS RETARDED SIR!!!!!

Born to Fight
Have Learned to Kill
Ready to Die
But Never Will

Army Recruits Quickly Abused in Training ( Read more... )

Thought for today...

There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2020, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections, but absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

a week before i go to parris island. 7 days. one more weekend. Not like that means anything. ohh well!