Title: The Set Up
Author:
roxy_palace Fandom: Bandom
Pairing: Frank/Gerard, Mikey/Ray
Rating: PG - for swears
Warning: Nada, Enchilada
Disclaimer: No offence intended nor ownership implied
Challenge: Schmoop Bingo!
Prompt: Playing matchmaker
Word count: 3384
AN: This fic is a standalone, but part of an AU where Frank and Gee run Skeleton Crew together, MCR never existed and they’re just awesome dudes from NJ. All the fic from the Schmoop Bingo card, which is
here, will be in this ‘verse. The first fic in this verse is
here.
Summary: “We’re at part three of the frikken plan already, Gee,” said Frank. “Only men who Mikey will date should be sitting on our couch right now. Only Mikey dating men.”
**********
“Gee...Ge-eee...Gee. Pssssst.”
Gerard looked up from the chopping board. Frank was standing by the kitchen door, hissing at him and sneaking looks down the hall at the living room every couple of seconds.
It seemed to Gerard like his ‘other half’ was trying - in his own, peculiarly Frank-ish way - to be surreptitious about it as he peeped one eye out just beyond the door jam. Actually - hoping on one foot, hair dishevelled, eyes like saucers - he looked vaguely insane. So, not much new there then.
“Seriously, Gee...he’s it?” Frank hissed without looking back at Gerard. “That guy is the best you could do?”
Gerard stopped what he was doing and tried to puzzle out what the hell Frank was talking about. Naturally he couldn’t. Frank so often came at him with only half the information, fully expecting Gerard to keep up. Nine times out of ten Gerard was left wondering what the hell was going on. He would complain about it, but as he looked at his boyf...fiancé clutching the door-jamb and twitching, Gerard was overcome by the same sensations he always had when he looked at Frank. He was charmed.
He put down the knife and bell pepper, walked up behind Frank and leant round him to look down the hall.
“What do you mean?”
Frank hissed frantically again and pulled him back into the kitchen.
“Waddaya mean, what do I mean?!” Frank squeaked, darting off again for another quick look. “I mean that guy,” he said, gesturing into the hall. “That guy sitting in our lounge, ignoring Mikey. He’s the best you could find to set your brother up with?”
Gerard looked out the door again, holding his boyfriend...sorry, fiancé (yay!), at bay with one hand as Frank scrabbled at his arm, trying to pull Gerard back.
From that angle Gerard could just see the back of the couch and the back of the heads of his brother and Ray.
Gerard had met Ray at a show a few weeks ago, but he’d been hearing about him around the neighbourhood for a while. He was a guitarist and a good one, so Gerard had invited Ray over to go through some demos in the hope of finding something to lure him into doing some work for Skeleton. Ray could shred and Gerard was keen for Frank to hear him play - the guy was that talented. In the course of schmoozing Ray, Gerard had discovered he was pretty cool too.
But setting him up with Mikey? He really didn’t have a clue what Frank was on about.
Gerard turned and pushed Frank back into the kitchen with one hand in the middle of his chest. There would be no setting up of anyone tonight, Gee was pretty sure. The two guys hadn’t said more than three words to each other so far this evening. And last he’d seen, Mikey had been sitting at one end of the couch staring into space with Ray’s ginormously bushy haired head at the other end of the couch, presumably seemingly staring into space also.
Which was ironic really, Gerard thought to himself with a chuckle, since Ray’s hair was actually visible from space.
“I mean, oh light of my eyes,” Frank was saying when Gee’d stopped giggling to himself. “That - that...hair you brought home for Mikey. Sub-standard, even for you.”
Gerard stopped and raised his eyebrows at Frank. “Sub...I see, because...” Gerard let his eyes wander over Frank’s compact form before blinking at him and smirking a little. “Yeah, my standards are usually much higher...”
Frank’s eyes narrowed. “Oh, I see,” he said. “I see how it’s going to be.”
Gerard grinned and had about a second to put down the spatula he was, for some reason, carrying before he had his arms full of Frank.
“I’ll show you standards, you big...big...” Frank all but writhed up against Gerard’s body. “Big ole, stupid ole....guy you,” he purred, and Gerard felt it rumble, right through his chest.
Gerard laughed again. “’Guy you’? Oh, Frankie,” he sighed, wrapping his arms tighter around him. He pressed his nose into Frank’s sweet smelling hair and just squeezed.
Frank wriggled in his arms and pressed their hips together. He looked up at Gerard. “Hello, sailor,” he whispered.
“Hey, hey, hey...” stuttered Gerard with some alarm. He realised Frank pushed them both up against the counter and there wasn’t a lot of room to move. He tried sliding out of Frank’s grasp, but Frank just slid along with him. A pot full of washed spinach clattered into the sink behind them, and box of dried oregano dumped onto the floor. “We have guests!”
“Guests schmests. My reputation has been besmirched.”
“I know,” croaked Gerard, trying to block Frank’s now roving fingers. “By me!” Frank ignored him completely and went for the waistband of his jeans. “C’mon! Knock it off...I can’t... mmmmph!” Gerard pushed Frank away and lowered his voice to a whisper. “Get your tongue out of my mouth and your hands off my ass. I can’t get a - a hard on in front of my kid brother and...Oh, God, Frankie... Ray for God’s sake!”
“Why not? Might give them a clue!” Frank hollered at the top of his lungs towards the door.
“Jesus, Frank!”
Frank stopped wriggling and squeezed Gerard tight before letting him go. He shrugged. “Ok...ok...no hanky panky before dinner then. Sheesh.”
Gerard straightened out his clothes and pulled himself back together. He was now a little ticked off. And turned on, which ticked him off even more. He didn’t really know what had gotten into Frank. But it wasn’t Gerard (again ticked off!).
“Look, what’s this all about? The whole...” He gestured at the kitchen door and then at Frank. “What setting up? I don’t know what you mean. Ray’s a guitarist - a really frikken good guitarist, by the way. But, I don’t know anything about setting anybody up.”
“Gee-eeee!” wailed Frank, busting out his long suffering, ‘how could you?!’ eye roll, which, yeah, never failed to piss Gerard off. He had plenty of his own, incredibly long suffering eye-rolls to dish out, thanks.
“I can’t believe...” Frank continued oblivious to Gerard’s increasingly thundery face. “We’ve been planning this for weeks! Remember? ‘Set Mikey Up With A Date For The Wedding - A Plan in ten parts by Gee and Frankie’. You wrote it in your diary. With the glitter pens?”
Gerard remembered Frank writing something in his diary with glitter pens while Gerard said things like ‘I don’t think Mikey would like us setting him up’ and ‘Mikey would really be against any kind of setting up plan, Frank, I’m serious’ and ‘Get the fuck away from my diary, assface’. Yeah, that he remembered.
He closed his eyes and pressed his finger tips to the bridge of his nose. “Ray? I didn’t...Ray’s not for Mikey. He’s for...for the fucking label. I bought him home to meet you. Not to pimp out to my baby brother. Jesus.”
“Well, what in the hell is he doing sitting on our couch then? We’re at part three of the frikken plan already, Gee,” said Frank as if Gerard agreed to the plan - whatever the hell it was - and was merely a tad behind on the project management side of things. “Only men who Mikey will date should be sitting on our couch right now. Only Mikey dating men.” He stood in front of Gerard with his hands on his hips.
“But, Mikey doesn’t need us setting him up, Frank,” said Gerard with frustration. He’d never involved himself in Mikey’s love life. Even when they were kids and Mikey had done things...fallen for people...that Gerard didn’t feel too crash-hot about, he’d never interfered. Mikey had his ways; he had his type. And he did okay. So sure, he was alone a lot and, yeah, he’d never had a long term thing. But...but...
“He’s - he’s happy,” Gerard said. “Right?” He looked at Frank whose raised eyebrows spoke volumes.
“Okay, so, he’s not happy happy,” Gerard backtracked. “But then who is?!” He wilted a little. Okay, it did worry him how much time Mikey seemed to spend alone. But setting him up? That seemed too drastic, too invasive.
Frank sighed. “You know who you know who’s happy happy, Gee-gee?” Frank asked slinking closer to Gerard. Gerard could feel himself flushing when Frank used that silly... (He swallowed hard) suggestive...pet name. Frank’s eyes were very, very dark. His lips were very red, and very wet.
Gerard frowned. Man, was it getting hot in this kitchen or what? He had to focus.
Okay, so, he wasn’t sure he knew anyone who was happy happy. Gerard usually felt pretty good about stuff, most of the time. He looked at Frank whose red, wet mouth was barely an inch away now. If he was being brutally honest, Gerard felt happy about things a lot really. But he couldn’t think of anyone else he knew who was particularly filled with joy. He shook his head and frowned.
Frank blinked. “Me, my Gee-gee,” he said finally, his eyes going soft. “Me.”
“Frank...”
“I’m happy happy,” said Frank, slipping his arms around Gerard’s waist and holding him close. “And you know why?”
And Gerard did know why; he should have known who Frank meant from the start - of course he should - because he felt exactly the same way. Gerard’s own eyes went a little misty as he smiled and pointed at himself.
Frank grinned back and wound his arms around Gerard tighter, pressing himself up against Gerard’s chest. “That’s right,” he said.
Gerard leaned down and kissed him then. Guests be damned.
Frank’s lips were warm and soft, and they parted for Gerard’s tongue without hesitation as he pressed forward. He waited for that little noise Frankie always made; a tiny hum of delight, every time they kissed. It never failed to make Gerard’s stomach flip. Frank obliged seconds later and Gerard cradled his face in his hands. God, yes. He was happy happy. He really was. Every time this insane, annoying, aggravating, confusing, gorgeous, kind hearted, tender man kissed him, let himself be kissed, Gerard knew happiness. Inside and out.
Of course he wanted Mikey to find that too.
Behind him, as they shifted against the bench, he heard a bunch of cutlery clatter to the ground followed by the chopping board and the splat of bell pepper on linoleum. Dinner was going to be late.
Frank started to pull away, but when Gerard frowned Frank peppered his cheeks with tiny kisses. Finally he leaned back and looked into Gerard’s eyes. “I fucking love you.”
Gerard laughed. “I fucking love you too, you maniac.”
“And I love Mikey, Gee. He’s my best friend, you know that, right?”
“I do,” Gerard sighed. “But I just...I don’t think setting people up is such a good idea.”
It was Frank’s turn to sigh. “He’s always on his own, Gee,” he said. “When he’s not with us. He doesn’t date, you know? Mikey goes to shows and he makes friends with bands and...Seriously, he’s like the God of A&R. But there’s no one special. Never been anyone special. And I just...He’s always been there for me. Always. And I...I want him to be as happy as we are.”
Frank twitched his nose.
“Plus, he really needs a date for the wedding.”
They both snickered and grinned at each other.
Gerard heard what Frank was saying, he really did, but more than anything he heard how much love Frank had banging around in that tiny frame of his. It was awesome, in every sense of the word. Gerard was in awe. He lent down and kissed Frank again, hard and desperate. “Frank...” He whispered. “Frankie...”
“God, Gee,” Frank growled back, his eyes going dark again as he pressed himself closer to Gerard. His thigh, solid and hot, slipped between Gerard’s and they both groaned. Frank pressed his forehead to Gerard’s shoulder and Gerard closed his eyes, shook himself a little and pulled back.
“Okay...okay,” said Frank. “Um, Focus, already...like you said, we have guests. Guests who we need to get to fuck.”
Spell utterly broken, Gerard laughed. “I thought you said Ray wasn’t good enough.”
“Well, who is? No one is ever going to be good enough for our little brother,” said Frank, indignant.
“Frank, he’s a year older than you.”
“Whatever,” whined Frank, rolling his eyes. “Anyway, I may have over -reacted with the whole Ray.” Frank waved his hands around his head to indicate Ray’s hair. Gerard nodded. To be fair, a lot of people over-reacted to Ray’s hair.
“I mean, you like Ray fine, don’t you?”
“Sure, he’s cool, talented, funny.” Gerard tried to summon up everything he knew about Ray. “You know, he’s got great thighs. Now that you come to mention it. “
Frank’s scowl was pretty expressive on that topic.
“Not that I’ve really given it any thought whatsoever, ever, at all, ever,” winced Gerard.
“And,” said Frank looking a little bit thundery, but clearly trying to move on to the next topic. “He’s gay?”
That gave Gerard pause. “Oh! I have no idea.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.
“Fuck.”
“Not really something that comes up in the studio all that much, to be honest, Angel,” said Gerard apologetically. His shoulders slumped. Now he was kind of getting into the idea of setting his kid brother up with someone and Ray was a pretty good candidate he’d thought. They liked the same bands, Ray was not an asshole and...Well...the two of them could discover the rest for themselves, but Gerard wasn’t going to set his brother up to get punched in the eye by a straight guy.
Frank frowned. “No, ‘So, I hear the new Iron Maiden album wails. By the way, do you like cock?’, nothing like that?” asked Frank biting his lip and shaking his head.
Gerard scoffed. “What the...no. What the fuck do you think I do for the label all day?”
“Look pretty and make people feel awesome about their band?”
“Jesus.”
“Anyway,” said Frank somewhat more dismissively that Gerard felt was entirely fair. “Shit, Gee. This information gap is gonna put a serious crimp in our plan.”
Gerard really agreed. Frank looked up at him, but disappointed though he was that the plan (and he still wasn’t 100 per cent sure what the plan entailed exactly, other than getting Mikey to fall in love with, well, anyone apparently) Gerard couldn’t help smiling again. Frank just looked so cute with that little thinky frown and his lips pursed, all determined.
“What plan?”
Gerard and Frank, still wrapped up in each other’s arms, jumped about a foot in the air. They both froze when they came back down - eyes locked on one another’s in horror.
“Guys, what plan?” Mikey asked again. Standing in the door. Of the kitchen. Where they’d just been planning how best to set him up with the complete stranger in the lounge.
Gerard’s stomach flipped and not in a good way. Mikey would be fucking furious if he knew they were conniving behind his back like this. He likely wouldn’t speak to either of them for a week.
“Mikes!” yelled Frankie, and Gerard was pretty sure anyone could hear the desperation in his voice. “Me old muckitty muck! Me old chum!”
“Yeah,” said Mikey levelly. He blinked and turned to Gerard. “Your pizza is taking too long, and Ray said he knows a place.”
“Right...?” Said Gerard.
“So... we’re gonna, you know,” Mikey raised his eyebrows. “Go.” He gestured over his shoulder with his thumb just as Ray appeared in the door holding Mikey’s jacket. He held it open for Mikey, who slipped into it without taking his eyes off Gerard’s. Once it was on, Mikey turned to Ray and said thanks in the smallest, sweetest voice Gerard had ever heard. Ray smiled at him. And then Gerard’s entire world view was upended because Mikey. Smiled. Back.
Next to him, Gerard could feel Frank practically vibrating out of his skin with the desire to do something obnoxious like leap on them both or start singing ‘Mikey and Ray, up a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G!’ Gerard put a calming hand on his shoulder. Frank squeaked so Gerard kicked him on the ankle while Mikey and Ray were not looking. Not looking because they were looking at each other. Correction: Blushing, and looking at each other, Gerard could not help noticing.
Ray looked away from Mikey. He seemed to go even redder when he noticed Gerard watching them. “Yeah, sorry to run out on...” He looked at the food and utensils on the floor and blinked. “What would have been a great dinner, I’m sure. But I’m, like really, really, you know...hungry and...Um...” He turned to Mikey. “I-I’ll go get the car.”
Mikey nodded and Ray grinned. He glanced at Gerard and Frank. “Nice t-to meet you, Frank. See you tomorrow Gee?” Ray stammered and sketched a quick wave at him before darting up the hall towards the front door.
“Sure thing, Ray!” Gee called after his retreating back.
Once Ray was gone Gerard couldn’t help grinning at Mikey. Frank was already jumping up and down and clapping.
“By the way, you both suck,” said Mikey.
“Mikes!” squeaked Frank oblivious to Mikey’s death-stare of doom. “Oh my God, you smooth operator. His thighs are awesome!”
And Gerard laughed out loud as Mikey rolled his eyes. “They are. Really, really awesome.”
“Hang on, hang on...” Gerard said a little confused. Mikey usually took a little longer than that to warm up to someone. “He asked you out? What’s...like. We left you alone for like 10 minutes. Now you’re going to get Pizza. I don’t...”
“Ten minutes? You two have been in here for two hours giggling and squealing and - and don’t think we didn’t hear you - making out,” said Mikey narrowing his eyes and pointing at Frank. “We watched Halloween and started on Prom Night before he even said anything to me. It was excruciating, in case you were wondering. He was gonna come and see what the holdup was. But then we heard, like, pots and pans falling on the ground.”
Frank giggled. Gerard felt his face flame up.
“God,” said Mikey, rolling his eyes. “I wanted to die. But then we got chatting and,” Mikey couldn’t seem to keep the smile at the corners of his mouth from spreading. “He’s cool.”
Gerard grinned. “He is pretty cool.”
Mikey grinned back. “Yeah...and his thighs...” he swooned.
A car horn sounded out on the street.
“Ok, gotta go. Bye!” said Mikey in a rush before he too disappeared out the front door.
The kitchen was suddenly deadly quiet.
Gerard turned to Frank. “Well,” he said, hands on his hips.
“Indeed,” said Frank, and Gerard couldn’t help noticing the tiny grin of delight twitching at the corners of his mouth too.
“You want I should call out for Pizza?” asked Gerard, nonchalantly, bending to pick up the cutlery and chopping board.
“Oh sure, sure,” said Frank with, Gerard notice, equal nonchalance. “Right after I do the...”
Gerard turned round shook his head. “Do not do it...”
“’I TOLD YOU SO’ DANCE!” Frank threw his arms up and the air and started shimmying around the small space shaking his hips frantically, and deliberately, Gerard was pretty sure, rubbing himself up against Gerard as much as possible.
He chanted ‘I told you so, I told you so’, over and over as Gerard walked out into the hall, picked up the cordless and dialled Pepe’s Pizza Palace. And when Pepe answered Frank kept on chanting ‘I told you so, I told you so’, albeit much more quietly, as Gerard ordered.
And he was still chanting it a little later when they collapsed on the couch to wait for their dinner to arrive.
“Okay, okay,” said Gerard sighing deeply. Really, Frank was a fucking handful. Which Gerard loved, but in this case, it was crap because he SO had not told Gerard so. C’mon! “You can quit it any time now.”
“I told you so, I told you so. Make me,” sassed Frank, pulling kissy-kissy faces between each verse of his obnoxious little chant. “I told you so, I told you...mmmmph!”
So, Gerard did.