Dealing with pain

[rtuxbury]

You Need me.

No I don't. I really don't anymore.

Hey, you created me, I didn't create some loser alter-ego to make myself feel better.Take some responsibility.

I do. I take responsibility for all of it.

*I am responsible for the pain. The gun is in my hand.*

Comments

LOL

[rtuxbury]

..ok I should have written that better. I just saw how that could be read.

This was mostly a note to myself about pain ownership. I believe I control everything in my life. That belief includes the pain I am in. I choose it. It is part of what stands between me and what I want. Edward Norten's character in fight club is the ultimate expression of internalized pain. He had a make believe person that would hit him in the face. He of course was hitting himself in the face. This is the ultimate expression of self created pain.

Sometimes, when the pain is intense, it is hard to believe you could ever have done this to yourself. Then when you hit the core of the pain, while holding onto the tail of your intension, enlightment is yours. You can then truly be free. Then the pain moves on and what is left is what you want.

Did that make sense?

[moderatrix]

*Hugs Mr. Floppy Socks*

Thanks

[rtuxbury]

See my comment above yours.

Re: Thanks

[moderatrix]

To sum it up in my prior shrink's phrasing - We own our pain.

No one can cause us to feel anything we don't want to feel, unless they physcially hurt you on purpose (but, that's different).

If someone says something negative to try and hurt us, it's up to us whether or not we allow them that power to do so. It's just when you've been conditioned by society to react rather than disconnect from it, it's a hard habit to break in my case. Trying, but knowing is half the battle. Go Team Joe!

LOL

Re: Thanks

[rtuxbury]

Yeah, I go a step further and say the physical harm that was done to me by another was also chosen. I placed myself in that space. I moved in alignment to them. I "wanted" or (worse) "not wanted" something and I needed to move pain that I wasn't moving consciously so I began the process in a way that would allow me to move the pain. This does not mean I wanted to be hurt. It means that pain was between me and what I wanted.

The comments that are yelled at me are actually my own voices in my head verbalized by the mirrors I place around me. The less I identify with those voices the less they have an affect on me. The key is to feel the pain. Not to stuff it. Place your intension and feel what is present. Move through the layers until you are fully empowered with them and then watch your intension come into being.

Before I did it I was very skeptical but with so many successes since I can't help but believe there is validity in the process.

You can call me if you want to discuss it further ;)

[bubbles]

It is a very valuable lesson to learn, and often needs to be voiced to reinforce the truth behind it.

I hope all is well in the land of self-realization.

Very well, I am....

[rtuxbury]

...100% empowered with my pain. It is a layer I am travelling through to improve my self love. Which is connected to my intension of full time director. I just had some tough stuff about bad worker, slacker, not worthy, etc. that was standing between me and that. Much closer but not through it all the way.

[nipsahoy]

You should do a suspension!

[ifihadwings]

Poopy. (in Timmy voice)