(no subject)
Author: askingxalice
Title: Mad As Hell
Story: Phase
Timeline: March 2013 - The day after Sarah Doesn’t Know - Sarah is 24.
Challenge: Flavor of the Day (juggernaut), Chocolate #9 (resentment), Candy Bar Crunch #30 (under my skin)
Word Count: 631
Rating: PG
juggernaut \JUHG-er-nawt\, noun: 1. Any large, overpowering, destructive force.
Example: Angie
Sarah would never outright hate Angie. Thinking about her older sister usually came with a wave of guilt and confusion, along with shame buried somewhere underneath. Occasionally, though, at the very bottom of it, there was a little burning ball of anger that made her want to throw something. At that moment, that little burning ball had turned into a raging inferno that made the edges of her vision go fuzzy and made it hard to breathe.
And so, like she did every time she needed to let go of some anger or think something over, she baked. It kept her hands busy enough to let her mind wander and hopefully sort things out, and at least making bread dough gave her something to punch. Sarah would never blame Angie for the way she acted, either. If their positions had been switched growing up, she couldn’t say that she wouldn’t be doing the same thing. But that didn’t mean that it didn’t hurt, and this last offense was the worst yet, if not the worst thing possible. Nothing could hurt worse than this. She refused to believe it, and something must have really gotten under Angie’s skin to make her do something as rash and evil as sleeping with Adrianna.
Usually, it was much more simple things. Simple things like property damage; spilling water or coffee over sketchbooks and other valuable items that could never be replaced, dropping laptops or other appliances, and in one rather angry episode, trying to light her old apartment on fire. There was no denying that Angie had some serious anger issues, if not a few mental ones from what they went through. But she had never tried to outright hurt her before, and Sarah wondered if it would have been better if Angie had just shot her.
Sarah remembered when they were younger, before she was even a teenager, Angie had once loved her. Once, she had told her that she was glad that their father left her alone, because at least one of them wouldn’t have to try and lie to other adults or children. Of course, it wasn’t long until that changed. Angie’s care had twisted into hatred and resentment, and Sarah had been left to basically fend for her own.
She had never been beaten, but her parents had never really loved her, either. In a way, it’s like they had forgotten she existed in the first place, and it was only lucky that Angie started hating her after she had grown old enough to feed and bathe and clothe herself. Before that, she had relied on her older sister. She had gone through middle school and high school wearing ill fitted clothes she had managed to scrounge from her sister and parents, and barely had a friend in the world because of it, while Angie had to cover up bruises and marks and drove everyone away with her anger at the world.
In a way, they were two peas in a pod. Their experiences with life were different, but still very similar, and Sarah thanked God every day that they had both somehow found the courage to up and leave as soon as they could, without a penny in their pockets and whatever they could carry. Angie had left as soon as she finished high school, and at that point in time, Sarah had actually wished that she had taken her along.
But that was a long time ago and half a country away. This was the here and now, where childhood alliances no longer mattered and anger always seemed to win, in the long run. Would Sarah ever hate Angie? No. But she could sure as hell be pissed.
Title: Mad As Hell
Story: Phase
Timeline: March 2013 - The day after Sarah Doesn’t Know - Sarah is 24.
Challenge: Flavor of the Day (juggernaut), Chocolate #9 (resentment), Candy Bar Crunch #30 (under my skin)
Word Count: 631
Rating: PG
juggernaut \JUHG-er-nawt\, noun: 1. Any large, overpowering, destructive force.
Example: Angie
Sarah would never outright hate Angie. Thinking about her older sister usually came with a wave of guilt and confusion, along with shame buried somewhere underneath. Occasionally, though, at the very bottom of it, there was a little burning ball of anger that made her want to throw something. At that moment, that little burning ball had turned into a raging inferno that made the edges of her vision go fuzzy and made it hard to breathe.
And so, like she did every time she needed to let go of some anger or think something over, she baked. It kept her hands busy enough to let her mind wander and hopefully sort things out, and at least making bread dough gave her something to punch. Sarah would never blame Angie for the way she acted, either. If their positions had been switched growing up, she couldn’t say that she wouldn’t be doing the same thing. But that didn’t mean that it didn’t hurt, and this last offense was the worst yet, if not the worst thing possible. Nothing could hurt worse than this. She refused to believe it, and something must have really gotten under Angie’s skin to make her do something as rash and evil as sleeping with Adrianna.
Usually, it was much more simple things. Simple things like property damage; spilling water or coffee over sketchbooks and other valuable items that could never be replaced, dropping laptops or other appliances, and in one rather angry episode, trying to light her old apartment on fire. There was no denying that Angie had some serious anger issues, if not a few mental ones from what they went through. But she had never tried to outright hurt her before, and Sarah wondered if it would have been better if Angie had just shot her.
Sarah remembered when they were younger, before she was even a teenager, Angie had once loved her. Once, she had told her that she was glad that their father left her alone, because at least one of them wouldn’t have to try and lie to other adults or children. Of course, it wasn’t long until that changed. Angie’s care had twisted into hatred and resentment, and Sarah had been left to basically fend for her own.
She had never been beaten, but her parents had never really loved her, either. In a way, it’s like they had forgotten she existed in the first place, and it was only lucky that Angie started hating her after she had grown old enough to feed and bathe and clothe herself. Before that, she had relied on her older sister. She had gone through middle school and high school wearing ill fitted clothes she had managed to scrounge from her sister and parents, and barely had a friend in the world because of it, while Angie had to cover up bruises and marks and drove everyone away with her anger at the world.
In a way, they were two peas in a pod. Their experiences with life were different, but still very similar, and Sarah thanked God every day that they had both somehow found the courage to up and leave as soon as they could, without a penny in their pockets and whatever they could carry. Angie had left as soon as she finished high school, and at that point in time, Sarah had actually wished that she had taken her along.
But that was a long time ago and half a country away. This was the here and now, where childhood alliances no longer mattered and anger always seemed to win, in the long run. Would Sarah ever hate Angie? No. But she could sure as hell be pissed.