Vinegar 19, Guava 8: Worth It
Title: Worth It
Main Story: In the Heart
Flavors, Toppings, Extras: Vinegar 19 (contents may be hot), guava 8 (cross my heart), malt (Personal prompt, Summer 2010: 5 crushes Aaron has had.), caramel.
Word Count: 1565
Rating: PG.
Summary: Will's life is in ruins.
Notes: For prom weekend. Also partially inspired by the brilliant Bujold quote "A life in ruins with vomiting is still a life in ruins."
Will slammed his way into the house, slouched his way up the stairs, shut his bedroom door with more than usual force, and threw himself full-length on his bed, burying his face in the pillow, where he lay motionless and tried not to hurt quite so much.
After a moment, his sister opened the door again and demanded, "What's the matter with you?"
"My life is in ruins," he replied, slightly muffled by the pillow. But damn if he was going to lift his head just so Molly could hear him more clearly.
"Whatever, loser," she said, and shut the door again. He could faintly hear her tramping down the stairs, calling, "Dad, Billy's being a loser again!"
He wished she'd stop calling him Billy. But then he stubbornly refused to call her Mari, so he supposed it was only fair. Not that he was really in a mood for being fair.
Did you have to be fair to your twin sister? It was an interesting conundrum. But his life was in ruins, so he wasn't going to think about it about right now.
Whatever.
God. Why did she have to go?
It took his father a few minutes to get up the stairs, but eventually Will felt the bed dip beside him as Dad sat down. "I hear your life is in ruins," he said.
"It is," Will said. "It's over. I might as well die now."
"You know," Dad said thoughtfully, "I'd expect this level of drama from your sister, but not from you."
Will, feeling as if he was not being taken entirely seriously, sat up and glared. "Dad," he said. "My life is in ruins. I am not being dramatic."
The look on his father's face suggested that Aaron Kendall felt otherwise, but thankfully he refrained from saying so. Besides, Will felt like he deserved some dramatics. "Okay," he said. "Why is your life in ruins?"
Reminded, Will slumped down and buried his face in the pillow again. "Hannah dumped me," he said.
"Sorry?"
"Hannah dumped me!" he yelled, turning his face to at his dad. "Clear enough?"
"Easy there, child of mine," Dad said, a faint reproof in his tone. "I'm on your side here."
Will turned his face back into his pillow. "I want to die," he said.
"Um," Dad said, and patted his back again. "I'm sorry to hear that."
He rolled over, flung his arms out across the bed, and narrowly missed hitting his father. "She dumped me for a jock, Dad, it's like some really stupid high school movie. The ones Molly and I used to mock when we were like twelve." He heaved a sigh. "But it hurts a lot. I didn't realize it hurt so much."
"Yeah," his dad said, and echoed his sigh. "I know it does. For what it's worth, and I know that's not a whole lot, it does stop hurting eventually."
Will glared at his father. "Like you'd know."
Dad raised his eyebrows. "I do, actually," he said.
"Oh, come on," Will said, sitting up. "You've been in love with Mom for like, forever."
"Believe it or not your mother and I had lives before you and your sister were born," his father said, very, very dryly. "In fact, for most of my life I didn't even know your mother."
"Sure, Dad," he said, and didn't roll his eyes since he was pretty sure Dad wouldn't appreciate it. "Aunt Ivy told me you'd never been in love before Mom."
Dad laughed. "Aunt Ivy doesn't know what she's talking about. Or she was lying to you." He considered, then added, "Or she's using a very narrow definition of love, which doesn't sound like her. I'm not sure. At any rate I'm also not sure why you were talking to her about this at all."
Will shrugged. Come to think of it, he didn't remember why either. "Dunno. You mean you dated people before Mom?"
"Oh, you darling naïve child," Dad said. "I'll have you know that I used to date Aunt Joy."
After a brief moment of utter speechlessness, Will squeaked, "You used to date a stripper?"
His father frowned. "Joy is a lot more than a stripper," he said, severely. "And I hope I raised you better than to treat anyone as their occupation, William."
"I didn't mean that," Will said, hastily. "It's not that. It's just... aren't you, um... I thought you didn't, um, have sex."
Dad shrugged. "I don't. And sometime you should ask Aunt Joy about the perception that strippers are prostitutes. You'll get an earful."
Will thought about that for a minute. "There's no way I'm going to get out of this without sounding like an idiot, is there."
"Nope," his dad said. "Accept it and move on."
"Okay," Will said. He crossed his legs and settled in for storytime. " So you seriously dated Aunt Joy?"
Dad grinned again. "I seriously dated Aunt Joy. Actually she was one of my better pre-Mom girlfriends. Joy has this thing about actually accepting other people's sexual orientations and not trying to persuade them that they actually need to have sex in order to have a fulfilling life. Because heaven knows I can't know my own feelings best."
"Um," Will said. "Kinda bitter there, Dad."
His father shrugged. "I guess, but you try constantly being told that you're broken because you're not normal. It gets old."
...okay, yeah, so Will was enough of a heterosexual teenager to find his parents' asexuality completely baffling. But it was who they were, and to be honest, he was kinda glad that the comfortable fiction that one's parents had never had sex ever was, in his case, completely true. Anyway, for somebody to say that about someone else was... "Did somebody say that to you? Really?"
"Not in so many words," Dad said. "But Lorelai... well, she did tell me I was kidding myself. And that sex was a natural part of human life, and if you don't want it there's something wrong with you, and so on and so forth." He grimaced. "Honestly I'm not sure why I stayed with her as long as I did, but I was a stupid kid."
"How old were you?" Will asked, expecting 'fourteen.'
"Twenty-one," Dad said, and laughed at Will's expression. "I'm afraid stupid-kidness doesn't end with adolescence, kiddo."
Whatever that meant. "Please tell me you dumped her, at least."
"I did," his dad said. "And none too soon, let me tell you."
Will ticked them off on his fingers. "So, that crazy lady--" his dad laughed again-- "and Aunt Joy, which still blows my mind, by the way. That's a whole two girlfriends. Unless you had more I'm still with Aunt Ivy."
"It's the quality, not the quantity," Dad said, serenely. "Although I'll have you know I had a number of other girlfriends. Plus, in college I fell in love with Arundhati Roy, and that has yet to change."
Will wrinkled his nose. "Who's Arundhati Roy? Is she somebody I know?"
His dad heaved another sigh, heavily. "I've failed you in so many ways, my child. She's an author. The God of Small Things, and many, many essays campaigning for a better world. You may have noticed," he added, "that I like women who try to save the world."
This time Will couldn't keep from actually rolling his eyes. "Celebrity crushes don't count. And also, ew."
"All right," Dad said. "How about the girl I had a crush on when I was six? It turned out she was only using me for my chocolate pudding. My heart was broken."
Which brought Will right back to his own, far more serious heartbreak. He groaned, and flopped back on his bed again. "Dad, how am I ever going to manage school again? Hannah's in half my classes."
"It'll suck," his dad agreed, solemn again. "I'm not trying to downplay any of this. It hurts like hell and it feels like it's never going to get any better."
"But it does," Will said, doubtfully.
"Yeah," his dad said. "It does. Really. And then you'll move on and you'll meet someone else, and break up with them too, except maybe this time it'll be you who does the breaking up."
Will groaned and threw an arm across his eyes. "Wash, rinse, repeat. Man, screw love."
"Except," his dad continued, quietly, "then you meet somebody like your mother at a party. Or you're like your Aunt Ivy and you walk into a bar and see the most beautiful girl in the world. Or like Uncle Lars and Aunt Danny, you bicker with each other for years and end up together. My point is, in all but a few of your relationships, love is going to suck, and it's going to hurt you as much as it's hurting you now, or maybe even more. But those few relationships that do work, those are magic. Those make it worth it." He patted Will's shoulder gently. "I know it hurts now, Will. But please believe me when I say that someday it will be worth it."
Will was quiet for a long, long moment. And then he said, "My life is still in ruins, you know."
His dad smiled again, sympathetically. "I know. I hope it builds itself up again soon."
"Yeah," Will said. "Thanks, Dad."
"You're welcome."
Main Story: In the Heart
Flavors, Toppings, Extras: Vinegar 19 (contents may be hot), guava 8 (cross my heart), malt (Personal prompt, Summer 2010: 5 crushes Aaron has had.), caramel.
Word Count: 1565
Rating: PG.
Summary: Will's life is in ruins.
Notes: For prom weekend. Also partially inspired by the brilliant Bujold quote "A life in ruins with vomiting is still a life in ruins."
Will slammed his way into the house, slouched his way up the stairs, shut his bedroom door with more than usual force, and threw himself full-length on his bed, burying his face in the pillow, where he lay motionless and tried not to hurt quite so much.
After a moment, his sister opened the door again and demanded, "What's the matter with you?"
"My life is in ruins," he replied, slightly muffled by the pillow. But damn if he was going to lift his head just so Molly could hear him more clearly.
"Whatever, loser," she said, and shut the door again. He could faintly hear her tramping down the stairs, calling, "Dad, Billy's being a loser again!"
He wished she'd stop calling him Billy. But then he stubbornly refused to call her Mari, so he supposed it was only fair. Not that he was really in a mood for being fair.
Did you have to be fair to your twin sister? It was an interesting conundrum. But his life was in ruins, so he wasn't going to think about it about right now.
Whatever.
God. Why did she have to go?
It took his father a few minutes to get up the stairs, but eventually Will felt the bed dip beside him as Dad sat down. "I hear your life is in ruins," he said.
"It is," Will said. "It's over. I might as well die now."
"You know," Dad said thoughtfully, "I'd expect this level of drama from your sister, but not from you."
Will, feeling as if he was not being taken entirely seriously, sat up and glared. "Dad," he said. "My life is in ruins. I am not being dramatic."
The look on his father's face suggested that Aaron Kendall felt otherwise, but thankfully he refrained from saying so. Besides, Will felt like he deserved some dramatics. "Okay," he said. "Why is your life in ruins?"
Reminded, Will slumped down and buried his face in the pillow again. "Hannah dumped me," he said.
"Sorry?"
"Hannah dumped me!" he yelled, turning his face to at his dad. "Clear enough?"
"Easy there, child of mine," Dad said, a faint reproof in his tone. "I'm on your side here."
Will turned his face back into his pillow. "I want to die," he said.
"Um," Dad said, and patted his back again. "I'm sorry to hear that."
He rolled over, flung his arms out across the bed, and narrowly missed hitting his father. "She dumped me for a jock, Dad, it's like some really stupid high school movie. The ones Molly and I used to mock when we were like twelve." He heaved a sigh. "But it hurts a lot. I didn't realize it hurt so much."
"Yeah," his dad said, and echoed his sigh. "I know it does. For what it's worth, and I know that's not a whole lot, it does stop hurting eventually."
Will glared at his father. "Like you'd know."
Dad raised his eyebrows. "I do, actually," he said.
"Oh, come on," Will said, sitting up. "You've been in love with Mom for like, forever."
"Believe it or not your mother and I had lives before you and your sister were born," his father said, very, very dryly. "In fact, for most of my life I didn't even know your mother."
"Sure, Dad," he said, and didn't roll his eyes since he was pretty sure Dad wouldn't appreciate it. "Aunt Ivy told me you'd never been in love before Mom."
Dad laughed. "Aunt Ivy doesn't know what she's talking about. Or she was lying to you." He considered, then added, "Or she's using a very narrow definition of love, which doesn't sound like her. I'm not sure. At any rate I'm also not sure why you were talking to her about this at all."
Will shrugged. Come to think of it, he didn't remember why either. "Dunno. You mean you dated people before Mom?"
"Oh, you darling naïve child," Dad said. "I'll have you know that I used to date Aunt Joy."
After a brief moment of utter speechlessness, Will squeaked, "You used to date a stripper?"
His father frowned. "Joy is a lot more than a stripper," he said, severely. "And I hope I raised you better than to treat anyone as their occupation, William."
"I didn't mean that," Will said, hastily. "It's not that. It's just... aren't you, um... I thought you didn't, um, have sex."
Dad shrugged. "I don't. And sometime you should ask Aunt Joy about the perception that strippers are prostitutes. You'll get an earful."
Will thought about that for a minute. "There's no way I'm going to get out of this without sounding like an idiot, is there."
"Nope," his dad said. "Accept it and move on."
"Okay," Will said. He crossed his legs and settled in for storytime. " So you seriously dated Aunt Joy?"
Dad grinned again. "I seriously dated Aunt Joy. Actually she was one of my better pre-Mom girlfriends. Joy has this thing about actually accepting other people's sexual orientations and not trying to persuade them that they actually need to have sex in order to have a fulfilling life. Because heaven knows I can't know my own feelings best."
"Um," Will said. "Kinda bitter there, Dad."
His father shrugged. "I guess, but you try constantly being told that you're broken because you're not normal. It gets old."
...okay, yeah, so Will was enough of a heterosexual teenager to find his parents' asexuality completely baffling. But it was who they were, and to be honest, he was kinda glad that the comfortable fiction that one's parents had never had sex ever was, in his case, completely true. Anyway, for somebody to say that about someone else was... "Did somebody say that to you? Really?"
"Not in so many words," Dad said. "But Lorelai... well, she did tell me I was kidding myself. And that sex was a natural part of human life, and if you don't want it there's something wrong with you, and so on and so forth." He grimaced. "Honestly I'm not sure why I stayed with her as long as I did, but I was a stupid kid."
"How old were you?" Will asked, expecting 'fourteen.'
"Twenty-one," Dad said, and laughed at Will's expression. "I'm afraid stupid-kidness doesn't end with adolescence, kiddo."
Whatever that meant. "Please tell me you dumped her, at least."
"I did," his dad said. "And none too soon, let me tell you."
Will ticked them off on his fingers. "So, that crazy lady--" his dad laughed again-- "and Aunt Joy, which still blows my mind, by the way. That's a whole two girlfriends. Unless you had more I'm still with Aunt Ivy."
"It's the quality, not the quantity," Dad said, serenely. "Although I'll have you know I had a number of other girlfriends. Plus, in college I fell in love with Arundhati Roy, and that has yet to change."
Will wrinkled his nose. "Who's Arundhati Roy? Is she somebody I know?"
His dad heaved another sigh, heavily. "I've failed you in so many ways, my child. She's an author. The God of Small Things, and many, many essays campaigning for a better world. You may have noticed," he added, "that I like women who try to save the world."
This time Will couldn't keep from actually rolling his eyes. "Celebrity crushes don't count. And also, ew."
"All right," Dad said. "How about the girl I had a crush on when I was six? It turned out she was only using me for my chocolate pudding. My heart was broken."
Which brought Will right back to his own, far more serious heartbreak. He groaned, and flopped back on his bed again. "Dad, how am I ever going to manage school again? Hannah's in half my classes."
"It'll suck," his dad agreed, solemn again. "I'm not trying to downplay any of this. It hurts like hell and it feels like it's never going to get any better."
"But it does," Will said, doubtfully.
"Yeah," his dad said. "It does. Really. And then you'll move on and you'll meet someone else, and break up with them too, except maybe this time it'll be you who does the breaking up."
Will groaned and threw an arm across his eyes. "Wash, rinse, repeat. Man, screw love."
"Except," his dad continued, quietly, "then you meet somebody like your mother at a party. Or you're like your Aunt Ivy and you walk into a bar and see the most beautiful girl in the world. Or like Uncle Lars and Aunt Danny, you bicker with each other for years and end up together. My point is, in all but a few of your relationships, love is going to suck, and it's going to hurt you as much as it's hurting you now, or maybe even more. But those few relationships that do work, those are magic. Those make it worth it." He patted Will's shoulder gently. "I know it hurts now, Will. But please believe me when I say that someday it will be worth it."
Will was quiet for a long, long moment. And then he said, "My life is still in ruins, you know."
His dad smiled again, sympathetically. "I know. I hope it builds itself up again soon."
"Yeah," Will said. "Thanks, Dad."
"You're welcome."