(no subject)
Pear #30. First & Last
Story : knights
Rating : R
Timeframe : 1270
Word Count : 3565
Gold Medal for team Rainbow Brains : 2500+
It was a different doorstep, as it often was, but the same scene it always was. There was Lyssa, planted in the middle of it, snow on her shoulders, snow on her boots, nothing but a threadbare cloak between her and the biting chill. And she stood there, cloak hanging open, letting the flakes gather on her breast, without so much as a shiver or the slightest prickle to her flesh, beaming like a fool. Barely pressed to the crack to which he’d opened the door and already shuddering, Kairn shook his head.
“Been shopping,” said Lyssa, and she gave the sack at her feet a nudge with the toe of her boot. “Thought you might let me cook again.”
“Lyss, I’d love to, but-”
“Is it your girlfriend?” The pat of small feet racing across the tile sounded behind him, and Kairn groaned as Lyssa’s face contorted with the restraint of a laugh.
“I told you-” he started and gave up, pulling the door wider to accommodate the head that forced its way past him.
Shamino wormed his way into the space between them, his gaze passing from Lyssa to the groceries. He offered her a sheepish smile and a “Hi, Lyssa.”
“Hi, Sham,” she said before turning back to Kairn. “So, dinner?”
“Whatever,” said Kairn. “Just get inside before you freeze.”
Lyssa gave a snort of a laugh as she hefted the sack up against her hip.
“What are we making?” Shamino pushed his way back past Kairn and down the hall with glances over his shoulder at Lyssa with every step.
“Stew.”
She waited just inside the door while Kairn did his best to reach around her in the narrow space and secure all the locks. There was a long, awkward silence after the last bolt slid home, where Lyssa offered him a tense grin over the top of the sack and Kairn eyed the bits of swiftly melting snow scattered over her. He’d just been shivering, standing in the draft from the door, but now, packed into the hallway with her, it was like someone had just lit a furnace next to him. He held as close to the wall as he could, returning her look with an uneasy smile of his own and scratching his head.
“You know,” he said at last, with a nod at the groceries, “you shouldn’t have.”
“I know.”
**********
Lyssa hovered over the pot, wooden spoon in one hand, tossing bits of powdered herbs in with the other. She’d frown, stir, add a pinch of something else, and give the whole mix a look of triumph, only to repeat the whole process again after a few minutes. Potato and peeler balanced over a wastebasket between his knees, Kairn just shook his head.
Shamino had rifled through the rest of the groceries, sampled from a bag of cherries, and settled on a sack of sugar. It was now prominently displayed on the table, the carrots he was supposed to be cutting pushed aside, and Sham was eyeing it with that thoughtful smirk of his that so reminded Kairn of his father.
“Lyssa?” he asked. All it ever took to wipe away any thought of Sethan was for the boy to open his mouth, he always sounded so hesitant.
“Hmm?” She gave the pot another jab with her spoon.
“What’s the sugar for?”
A few more crumbled leaves sailed over the rim. “Dessert.”
That lit a fire in Sham’s eyes. “Are you going to make more cinnamon buns?”
“Better.” Leaving the spoon to stand in the pot, she came over to the table. Fingering the bag of cherries, she shot Kairn a grin. “Pie.”
Kairn shook his head again and raked another strip of peel from the potato in his hand.
“Pie?” said Shamino, as if the offering of such a thing were incomprehensible.
“You’ll slice those carrots,” said Kairn, “and have some dinner first if you expect to get any.”
Knife and carrots were back in his hands before Kairn could finish the sentence.
**********
“Well,” Kairn addressed the approaching pat of feet against the tile without so much as a turn of his head. He dragged a sponge through the remains of pie gummed to one of the plates. “I can see why Ski doesn’t like your bedtime stories.”
Lyssa snorted as she settled in beside him at the sink. “Something wrong with my stories?”
Kairn shook his head and scraped a bit of cherry off the edge of the plate. “Epic battles of good and evil?” he said. “I was there, Lyss. It wasn’t anything anywhere near so grand.”
“Yeah, I don’t think I’ll be making any kids’ stories out of that one.” She dipped a hand into the basin and drew another grimy dish from the water. “Anyway, you should see the way his face lights up, especially at the monsters-”
“I’ll bet it does.” He eyed the window over the back of the sink. Reida would like that too, if she knew. Lyssa filling the boy’s head with demons. He shook his head again, put the plate on the counter, and gave the next a half-hearted wipe.
“What has gotten into you tonight?” The sponge she’d just managed to extract from behind the faucet fell into the basin with a splat.
Kairn looked up to find her scowling at him. “Nothing.” He turned back to picking at his plate. “Everything.” A bit of debris flaked off into the water. He sighed and let the whole plate sink beneath the surface. “You. Acting like you all but live here. You shouldn’t even be here. I told you to meet me at the market, didn’t I?”
He ventured another look her way, and there was a moment of uncomfortable quiet in which he swore there was a hiss from the sink. “Guess it was too much to expect a ’thank you’ for the dinner.”
“It’s not that I don’t appreciate-” He sighed again and raked a wet hand through his hair as Lyssa retrieved both her sponge and the plate he’d just abandoned. “I just…I’m not comfortable with you staying here,” he finished lamely, with another look out the window.
“Is this about the shirt?” The edge was gone from her voice, all her efforts focused on scouring the last bits of pie from the dish. “‘Cause I brought extra clothes this time in case I fall asleep on your couch again. And they cover, well, pretty much everything. I think.” The dish clattered against the counter and she drew another from the water and kept scrubbing. “And he’s what? Nine? It’s not like he was look- Alright, so he probably was, but I told you, it’s taken care of. No peep shows for the kid.”
“That’s not it.” The rooftops were bathed in snow and moonlight, a sea of white planes, too bright for this hour of the night.
“The kiss then?” She wrinkled her nose and ground her sponge against the dish. “You still think I set you up. I mean it only took six years of you chasing me and I still haven‘t-”
“It’s not the kiss either.” No one could hide in that, and it was too cold to try at any rate.
Lyssa paused, soapy sponge and plate hanging in her hands, the accusatory tone fully returned to her words. “Then what?”
“It’s nothing.” Her eyes followed his to the chimney across the alley, and he thought about explaining it all, but he blinked and looked away instead.
“Now that I’m really not buying.” She laid down the plate, the sponge on top of it, shook out her hands, and turned around, folding her arms and leaning against the counter to glare at him. “You know, I’m trying to make an effort here.”
“So I noticed.” He reached past her, took up a plate and a sponge of his own. “What?” he said, as she turned back around. “Did you think I’d just invite you to move in here and play house with us or something?”
Without meeting his gaze, she snatched her plate back up and went back to washing it. “Seems to be what you’ve wanted all along.”
They were nearly pressed together, with that same awkward heat he’d felt at the door when she arrived, and he was staring down at his plate, fervently covering it in suds. Kairn bit his lip. He let it go and drew a slow breath. “Things change,” he said.
“Right. Things change. I’ve spent years pretending this wasn’t happening, and now I’m giving us a chance. Unless you don’t want-” Her plate came to rest atop the first with a clink. He looked up, and she turned and straightened to look him in the eye. She ran her tongue over her lips and the temperature in the sink crept upwards. “Are you over me now? ‘Cause if you are, just say so and-”
“Lyss, it’s not that. It’s just…It’s too risky. I already have Sham to worry about, and I don’t want to go dragging you into-” He yanked his hands from the water as a few bubbles raced toward the surface.
“Oh,” said Lyssa, hands on her hips. “So now I’m too much trouble, am I?”
“Lyssa…” He looked from her to the water and back as more bubbles surfaced.
“What?” she said, ignoring the fact that she was about to boil the dishes. “You want me but you don’t want me. So it’s back to the usual games. Look, I’m getting real sick of dancing around the truth in everything in my life, so make up your-”
“You were followed last time.”
Her brows knit. “What do you mean?”
“Lyss, we’ve both been careless about these things.” He shot the sink and its slowly swelling stream of bubbles a nervous glance. “You…you can’t just keep hanging around here. You have to understand.” Lyssa snorted. “Lyss-”
“Nah, I understand.” She bent, snatched a towel off the cabinet handle, and started drying her hands. “I’ll get out of your hair, go back to being just a meal ticket.” She gave the towel a violent twist and Kairn winced. “We can pretend none of this ever meant anything. Again.” Another jerk to the towel, and a hiss from the sink “Quiet back alley next time? Poorly lit bar?”
“Thank you so much.” The sink was steaming now, bubbles rolling through the water. A haze began to creep across the window as the steam met the cold. “Don’t you have your own family to take care of anyway?”
The towel and her jaw fell. The sink ceased its churning, and a chill swept through the room as if the window had been opened and the snow let in.
Kairn put a hand to his mouth. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean-” She was still staring at him, mouth hung wide, hands frozen in the air, a sense of shock and hurt in her eyes as if he’d hit her. He reached out a hand. “I-it’s you I’m worried about.” She blinked at him, twisting away as he neared her shoulder. “She’s not going to hurt me. Lyssa, please-”
The fire gone from her eyes, her shoulders slumped, she turned from him. “No, I get it. I…I’m sorry.”
Kairn hurried after her, his throat tight. This was the Lyssa he’d seen curled against herself, digging a flask out of her cloak, and he wasn’t about to be the one to drive her to that. She was halfway across the room when he caught her, his hand around her arm, and she froze. “Please,” he said, tugging her around.
Their eyes met, and she chewed her lip for a moment and shuffled a step closer, his hand still on her arm.
“Look,” he started, and he shifted his weight, the heat of the room seeming to rise again as she drew near. “Lyss, I…”
“Shhh.”
She was closing in, or maybe he was pulling her. Their noses brushed, and then their lips, and he found himself opening his mouth and leaning into the kiss. They parted for a breath, and then her hands closed over his cheeks and she was kissing him again.
“Lyss, I didn’t mean…”
Their eyes were level, the uncertainty still there in hers, though the fire was returning, and their lips stayed close. She slid a hand up through his hair. “Shhh.”
“What are we-”
“Shhh.” Her breath hissed past his lips, hot and wet, and this time he reached for her, pressing a hand to either side of her jaw, pulling her in.
She tasted of cherries and of wine. Her hands curled round the back of his head, their bodies pressed close, they staggered a pace.
“I should go,” she said, as he floundered for breath. Their lips met again as they reached the counter, and Lyssa threw out a hand to steady herself.
“Yes,” he mumbled, straining for another kiss. “You should.”
“You’re not-” she kissed him again “-supposed to agree with me.”
She was pinned now, between him and the cabinets, and she was so warm, so intoxicating, and he found himself pressing closer still. “Alright then,” he said. “Don’t go.”
“You need to make up your mind.” Not that she was making it any easier, her lips playing at his between her words.
“You too.”
“I really should-”
Kairn stepped away.
He pulled his arms tight to himself, swallowed hard and looked her over. Lyssa slouched against the counter, eyes wide, lips parted, thick red mane spilled over her shoulders, still tousled where he‘d had his hands in it a moment ago. Kairn ran a hand through his own hair with a sigh. “Do you have any idea how long I have been trying to get you into my life?”
She scowled. “Yeah. And then you tell me to get out.”
“I know, I know!” He threw up his hands, turned on his heel, and started to pace. It was easier than looking at her. “It’s just…it’s not safe.”
“I bring my sword with me, you know.”
“It’s after you leave that worries me. And I know, the sword goes with you, but-”
There was a hand on his shoulder, forcing him around, and he found himself eye to eye with her again, caught up in her heat. “So maybe I shouldn’t go at all?” There was a twitch to her lips, a slow raise of her brow, and he grabbed her and kissed her as hard as he could She pulled back at last with a grin. “Kiss me like that again and I won’t, you know.”
His grip on her tightened as he leaned in again. “In that case-”
“Oh?” She tensed and he paused.
“You said I needed to make up my mind.”
A frown played across her lips. “That mean you’re not going to regret this in the morning?”
“Did I say that?”
“Kairn…”
For a moment he found himself wondering how Lyssa got to be the voice of reason in this. “Look,” he said, trailing a hand down her arm, trying not to look her in the eye, “you’re here now. What’s it matter if it’s for an hour or for the night?”
“So you do want me to stay then?” They were tempting words in a dangerous tone, and he let his hand drift down along the low swoop of her neckline and gave a bit of a stiff nod.
Her hand shot past his and made for the ties that held the fabric over her breast. “Well then,” she said with a grin, and gave the laces a tug.
“Lyssa- I-” Kairn stammered as the cinch came loose between her fingers and the cloth slid from the tops of her breasts. “Gods, the curtains!”
“Wha-?” She caught the top of her shirt before it could slip away, staring at him in confusion as he dove past her for the window.
“You’re being followed, remember?” He yanked the heavy bolts of cloth across the pane.
“Would they really…?”
“Yes.” He planted himself between her and the window, as if somehow his body could better block the imagined line of view. “Now where were we?”
Lyssa gave the edge of her shirt draped over her hands a frown and looked up with a grin. “Taking things to your room?”
Kairn ran a shaky hand through his hair. “Sounds good to me.”
“Would you quit fussing with the curtains?” said Lyssa, as he hurried to block the bedroom window as well. “Show’s over here.”
The room descended into darkness as the snowy rooftops disappeared from view. The candles on the side table, that she’d lit with little more than a breath, flared and spread their glow.
“I…It’s just-” Kairn let loose of the curtains and turned. “Dear gods, woman.”
She was braced on one arm against the doorframe, shirt and pants in a heap at her feet. Long auburn locks fell in loose ringlets over otherwise bare breasts. Her feet wound together, thrusting one hip into the room. Her other hand lay there, just above her waist, and the candles cast their firey dance over her flesh.
“So,” she said, as he stood there, wordlessly chewing the air, “where were we again?”
“I…I think you’ve skipped ahead a bit.”
Lyssa snorted. She picked her way out of her discarded clothes and sauntered towards him with a grin. “Well then,” she said. Her hand landed playfully on his chest and the heat of her presence engulfed him again. “Have to get you caught up, don’t we?”
His jaw dropped, snapped shut, and fell open again as she picked apart the laces of his shirt.
“Nervous?” said Lyssa. She whisked the shirt over his head without waiting for a response.
Kairn was shaking as she laid her hand back against his bare chest. “Sh-shouldn’t I be?”
“Relax.” She drew closer still, brushing up against him, taunting him with her warmth. “It’s just you and me.”
Not sure where to start, he set his hands on her hips. “Lyss, it’s been ages-”
“It’s not something you forget.”
He let one trembling hand slide up her ribs. “And you’ve had, I mean there’s been, I don’t know if I-”
Lyssa caught his chin and forced him to meet her eyes. “I want you.” Kairn swallowed. “Come on, you’ve got nothing to be afraid of. Just kiss me.” He leaned in, their lips brushed. “Like you did back in the kitchen, when you thought I’d leave.” He caught her mouth with more force this time. “Like neither one of us is ever going anywhere again.”
Kairn pulled away. “You know we can’t-”
“I know, I know.” She dragged her hand up over his cheek, spread her fingers through his hair. “Just tonight. Just pretend.”
“Like that’s going to work,” said Kairn, but he was already leaning in again for another kiss.
“Won’t know if we don’t try.”
It might have been an hour later or halfway to dawn. The candles had expended themselves and the tightly drawn curtains blocked out the stars. Still struggling to find his breath and slow his heart, Kairn nestled closer to the form he couldn’t see but could feel all around him.
“So,” said Lyssa, wedged under his arm, her head heavy against his shoulder, her leg curled over his own, “what did you have to be worried about?”
At least in the dark she couldn’t see him blush. “I- I just…”
She laughed, and it rippled all up along her frame where they were pressed together, and he almost laughed at himself as it made him feel all tingly again. A hand slid down his chest as the laughter subsided, and she murmured, “Thank you for the best night I've had in a long time.”
Kairn did laugh at that. “My pleasure,” he said and found himself blushing even hotter. He caught her hand, as it paused over his heart, and gave it a squeeze. “I…I’d say ‘anytime,’ but we both know…”
Her hand slid from his chest, fingers curling back against his own. “I could be quiet,” she said. “I mean, when I leave, and-”
“Lyss…”
There was a sigh, another squeeze of his hand, then, “I’ve got a sword, you know.”
“And she’s got much, much worse.”
“She?” her head left his shoulder and he didn’t need to see to know the look on her face. “Old lover of yours?” He half expected the burnt out stump of a candle to reignite itself.
“Hardly! She’s…I don’t even know what she is.” He fumbled in the dark for her shoulders to coax her back into his arms. “Just be careful, alright?”
She was laughing again as she settled beside him. “You don’t have to worry about me.”
Kairn wound one arm tightly around her shoulders and with the other hand found her hip. “But I do.”
“It’s sweet.” There was that hand on his chest again, weaving sleepy strokes across him, and he pulled her closer. “Completely uncalled for, but sweet.”
“We’re doing this at a bar next time. I mean, not this, but, you know…”
He felt the sigh more than heard it. “I know.” She wedged her head beneath his chin. “I’m sleeping here tonight though.”
“Right.” He laid a kiss in her hair as he squeezed her again, and the sigh that came from her now seemed contented. “Not much chance I’m letting you go right now anyway.”
I would have liked to have come up with something for them to talk about at dinner, and I feel a little bad for the fade to black. But I don't think they actually hurt it with their absence. And I am so glad to finally be done with this piece.
Story : knights
Rating : R
Timeframe : 1270
Word Count : 3565
Gold Medal for team Rainbow Brains : 2500+
It was a different doorstep, as it often was, but the same scene it always was. There was Lyssa, planted in the middle of it, snow on her shoulders, snow on her boots, nothing but a threadbare cloak between her and the biting chill. And she stood there, cloak hanging open, letting the flakes gather on her breast, without so much as a shiver or the slightest prickle to her flesh, beaming like a fool. Barely pressed to the crack to which he’d opened the door and already shuddering, Kairn shook his head.
“Been shopping,” said Lyssa, and she gave the sack at her feet a nudge with the toe of her boot. “Thought you might let me cook again.”
“Lyss, I’d love to, but-”
“Is it your girlfriend?” The pat of small feet racing across the tile sounded behind him, and Kairn groaned as Lyssa’s face contorted with the restraint of a laugh.
“I told you-” he started and gave up, pulling the door wider to accommodate the head that forced its way past him.
Shamino wormed his way into the space between them, his gaze passing from Lyssa to the groceries. He offered her a sheepish smile and a “Hi, Lyssa.”
“Hi, Sham,” she said before turning back to Kairn. “So, dinner?”
“Whatever,” said Kairn. “Just get inside before you freeze.”
Lyssa gave a snort of a laugh as she hefted the sack up against her hip.
“What are we making?” Shamino pushed his way back past Kairn and down the hall with glances over his shoulder at Lyssa with every step.
“Stew.”
She waited just inside the door while Kairn did his best to reach around her in the narrow space and secure all the locks. There was a long, awkward silence after the last bolt slid home, where Lyssa offered him a tense grin over the top of the sack and Kairn eyed the bits of swiftly melting snow scattered over her. He’d just been shivering, standing in the draft from the door, but now, packed into the hallway with her, it was like someone had just lit a furnace next to him. He held as close to the wall as he could, returning her look with an uneasy smile of his own and scratching his head.
“You know,” he said at last, with a nod at the groceries, “you shouldn’t have.”
“I know.”
**********
Lyssa hovered over the pot, wooden spoon in one hand, tossing bits of powdered herbs in with the other. She’d frown, stir, add a pinch of something else, and give the whole mix a look of triumph, only to repeat the whole process again after a few minutes. Potato and peeler balanced over a wastebasket between his knees, Kairn just shook his head.
Shamino had rifled through the rest of the groceries, sampled from a bag of cherries, and settled on a sack of sugar. It was now prominently displayed on the table, the carrots he was supposed to be cutting pushed aside, and Sham was eyeing it with that thoughtful smirk of his that so reminded Kairn of his father.
“Lyssa?” he asked. All it ever took to wipe away any thought of Sethan was for the boy to open his mouth, he always sounded so hesitant.
“Hmm?” She gave the pot another jab with her spoon.
“What’s the sugar for?”
A few more crumbled leaves sailed over the rim. “Dessert.”
That lit a fire in Sham’s eyes. “Are you going to make more cinnamon buns?”
“Better.” Leaving the spoon to stand in the pot, she came over to the table. Fingering the bag of cherries, she shot Kairn a grin. “Pie.”
Kairn shook his head again and raked another strip of peel from the potato in his hand.
“Pie?” said Shamino, as if the offering of such a thing were incomprehensible.
“You’ll slice those carrots,” said Kairn, “and have some dinner first if you expect to get any.”
Knife and carrots were back in his hands before Kairn could finish the sentence.
**********
“Well,” Kairn addressed the approaching pat of feet against the tile without so much as a turn of his head. He dragged a sponge through the remains of pie gummed to one of the plates. “I can see why Ski doesn’t like your bedtime stories.”
Lyssa snorted as she settled in beside him at the sink. “Something wrong with my stories?”
Kairn shook his head and scraped a bit of cherry off the edge of the plate. “Epic battles of good and evil?” he said. “I was there, Lyss. It wasn’t anything anywhere near so grand.”
“Yeah, I don’t think I’ll be making any kids’ stories out of that one.” She dipped a hand into the basin and drew another grimy dish from the water. “Anyway, you should see the way his face lights up, especially at the monsters-”
“I’ll bet it does.” He eyed the window over the back of the sink. Reida would like that too, if she knew. Lyssa filling the boy’s head with demons. He shook his head again, put the plate on the counter, and gave the next a half-hearted wipe.
“What has gotten into you tonight?” The sponge she’d just managed to extract from behind the faucet fell into the basin with a splat.
Kairn looked up to find her scowling at him. “Nothing.” He turned back to picking at his plate. “Everything.” A bit of debris flaked off into the water. He sighed and let the whole plate sink beneath the surface. “You. Acting like you all but live here. You shouldn’t even be here. I told you to meet me at the market, didn’t I?”
He ventured another look her way, and there was a moment of uncomfortable quiet in which he swore there was a hiss from the sink. “Guess it was too much to expect a ’thank you’ for the dinner.”
“It’s not that I don’t appreciate-” He sighed again and raked a wet hand through his hair as Lyssa retrieved both her sponge and the plate he’d just abandoned. “I just…I’m not comfortable with you staying here,” he finished lamely, with another look out the window.
“Is this about the shirt?” The edge was gone from her voice, all her efforts focused on scouring the last bits of pie from the dish. “‘Cause I brought extra clothes this time in case I fall asleep on your couch again. And they cover, well, pretty much everything. I think.” The dish clattered against the counter and she drew another from the water and kept scrubbing. “And he’s what? Nine? It’s not like he was look- Alright, so he probably was, but I told you, it’s taken care of. No peep shows for the kid.”
“That’s not it.” The rooftops were bathed in snow and moonlight, a sea of white planes, too bright for this hour of the night.
“The kiss then?” She wrinkled her nose and ground her sponge against the dish. “You still think I set you up. I mean it only took six years of you chasing me and I still haven‘t-”
“It’s not the kiss either.” No one could hide in that, and it was too cold to try at any rate.
Lyssa paused, soapy sponge and plate hanging in her hands, the accusatory tone fully returned to her words. “Then what?”
“It’s nothing.” Her eyes followed his to the chimney across the alley, and he thought about explaining it all, but he blinked and looked away instead.
“Now that I’m really not buying.” She laid down the plate, the sponge on top of it, shook out her hands, and turned around, folding her arms and leaning against the counter to glare at him. “You know, I’m trying to make an effort here.”
“So I noticed.” He reached past her, took up a plate and a sponge of his own. “What?” he said, as she turned back around. “Did you think I’d just invite you to move in here and play house with us or something?”
Without meeting his gaze, she snatched her plate back up and went back to washing it. “Seems to be what you’ve wanted all along.”
They were nearly pressed together, with that same awkward heat he’d felt at the door when she arrived, and he was staring down at his plate, fervently covering it in suds. Kairn bit his lip. He let it go and drew a slow breath. “Things change,” he said.
“Right. Things change. I’ve spent years pretending this wasn’t happening, and now I’m giving us a chance. Unless you don’t want-” Her plate came to rest atop the first with a clink. He looked up, and she turned and straightened to look him in the eye. She ran her tongue over her lips and the temperature in the sink crept upwards. “Are you over me now? ‘Cause if you are, just say so and-”
“Lyss, it’s not that. It’s just…It’s too risky. I already have Sham to worry about, and I don’t want to go dragging you into-” He yanked his hands from the water as a few bubbles raced toward the surface.
“Oh,” said Lyssa, hands on her hips. “So now I’m too much trouble, am I?”
“Lyssa…” He looked from her to the water and back as more bubbles surfaced.
“What?” she said, ignoring the fact that she was about to boil the dishes. “You want me but you don’t want me. So it’s back to the usual games. Look, I’m getting real sick of dancing around the truth in everything in my life, so make up your-”
“You were followed last time.”
Her brows knit. “What do you mean?”
“Lyss, we’ve both been careless about these things.” He shot the sink and its slowly swelling stream of bubbles a nervous glance. “You…you can’t just keep hanging around here. You have to understand.” Lyssa snorted. “Lyss-”
“Nah, I understand.” She bent, snatched a towel off the cabinet handle, and started drying her hands. “I’ll get out of your hair, go back to being just a meal ticket.” She gave the towel a violent twist and Kairn winced. “We can pretend none of this ever meant anything. Again.” Another jerk to the towel, and a hiss from the sink “Quiet back alley next time? Poorly lit bar?”
“Thank you so much.” The sink was steaming now, bubbles rolling through the water. A haze began to creep across the window as the steam met the cold. “Don’t you have your own family to take care of anyway?”
The towel and her jaw fell. The sink ceased its churning, and a chill swept through the room as if the window had been opened and the snow let in.
Kairn put a hand to his mouth. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean-” She was still staring at him, mouth hung wide, hands frozen in the air, a sense of shock and hurt in her eyes as if he’d hit her. He reached out a hand. “I-it’s you I’m worried about.” She blinked at him, twisting away as he neared her shoulder. “She’s not going to hurt me. Lyssa, please-”
The fire gone from her eyes, her shoulders slumped, she turned from him. “No, I get it. I…I’m sorry.”
Kairn hurried after her, his throat tight. This was the Lyssa he’d seen curled against herself, digging a flask out of her cloak, and he wasn’t about to be the one to drive her to that. She was halfway across the room when he caught her, his hand around her arm, and she froze. “Please,” he said, tugging her around.
Their eyes met, and she chewed her lip for a moment and shuffled a step closer, his hand still on her arm.
“Look,” he started, and he shifted his weight, the heat of the room seeming to rise again as she drew near. “Lyss, I…”
“Shhh.”
She was closing in, or maybe he was pulling her. Their noses brushed, and then their lips, and he found himself opening his mouth and leaning into the kiss. They parted for a breath, and then her hands closed over his cheeks and she was kissing him again.
“Lyss, I didn’t mean…”
Their eyes were level, the uncertainty still there in hers, though the fire was returning, and their lips stayed close. She slid a hand up through his hair. “Shhh.”
“What are we-”
“Shhh.” Her breath hissed past his lips, hot and wet, and this time he reached for her, pressing a hand to either side of her jaw, pulling her in.
She tasted of cherries and of wine. Her hands curled round the back of his head, their bodies pressed close, they staggered a pace.
“I should go,” she said, as he floundered for breath. Their lips met again as they reached the counter, and Lyssa threw out a hand to steady herself.
“Yes,” he mumbled, straining for another kiss. “You should.”
“You’re not-” she kissed him again “-supposed to agree with me.”
She was pinned now, between him and the cabinets, and she was so warm, so intoxicating, and he found himself pressing closer still. “Alright then,” he said. “Don’t go.”
“You need to make up your mind.” Not that she was making it any easier, her lips playing at his between her words.
“You too.”
“I really should-”
Kairn stepped away.
He pulled his arms tight to himself, swallowed hard and looked her over. Lyssa slouched against the counter, eyes wide, lips parted, thick red mane spilled over her shoulders, still tousled where he‘d had his hands in it a moment ago. Kairn ran a hand through his own hair with a sigh. “Do you have any idea how long I have been trying to get you into my life?”
She scowled. “Yeah. And then you tell me to get out.”
“I know, I know!” He threw up his hands, turned on his heel, and started to pace. It was easier than looking at her. “It’s just…it’s not safe.”
“I bring my sword with me, you know.”
“It’s after you leave that worries me. And I know, the sword goes with you, but-”
There was a hand on his shoulder, forcing him around, and he found himself eye to eye with her again, caught up in her heat. “So maybe I shouldn’t go at all?” There was a twitch to her lips, a slow raise of her brow, and he grabbed her and kissed her as hard as he could She pulled back at last with a grin. “Kiss me like that again and I won’t, you know.”
His grip on her tightened as he leaned in again. “In that case-”
“Oh?” She tensed and he paused.
“You said I needed to make up my mind.”
A frown played across her lips. “That mean you’re not going to regret this in the morning?”
“Did I say that?”
“Kairn…”
For a moment he found himself wondering how Lyssa got to be the voice of reason in this. “Look,” he said, trailing a hand down her arm, trying not to look her in the eye, “you’re here now. What’s it matter if it’s for an hour or for the night?”
“So you do want me to stay then?” They were tempting words in a dangerous tone, and he let his hand drift down along the low swoop of her neckline and gave a bit of a stiff nod.
Her hand shot past his and made for the ties that held the fabric over her breast. “Well then,” she said with a grin, and gave the laces a tug.
“Lyssa- I-” Kairn stammered as the cinch came loose between her fingers and the cloth slid from the tops of her breasts. “Gods, the curtains!”
“Wha-?” She caught the top of her shirt before it could slip away, staring at him in confusion as he dove past her for the window.
“You’re being followed, remember?” He yanked the heavy bolts of cloth across the pane.
“Would they really…?”
“Yes.” He planted himself between her and the window, as if somehow his body could better block the imagined line of view. “Now where were we?”
Lyssa gave the edge of her shirt draped over her hands a frown and looked up with a grin. “Taking things to your room?”
Kairn ran a shaky hand through his hair. “Sounds good to me.”
“Would you quit fussing with the curtains?” said Lyssa, as he hurried to block the bedroom window as well. “Show’s over here.”
The room descended into darkness as the snowy rooftops disappeared from view. The candles on the side table, that she’d lit with little more than a breath, flared and spread their glow.
“I…It’s just-” Kairn let loose of the curtains and turned. “Dear gods, woman.”
She was braced on one arm against the doorframe, shirt and pants in a heap at her feet. Long auburn locks fell in loose ringlets over otherwise bare breasts. Her feet wound together, thrusting one hip into the room. Her other hand lay there, just above her waist, and the candles cast their firey dance over her flesh.
“So,” she said, as he stood there, wordlessly chewing the air, “where were we again?”
“I…I think you’ve skipped ahead a bit.”
Lyssa snorted. She picked her way out of her discarded clothes and sauntered towards him with a grin. “Well then,” she said. Her hand landed playfully on his chest and the heat of her presence engulfed him again. “Have to get you caught up, don’t we?”
His jaw dropped, snapped shut, and fell open again as she picked apart the laces of his shirt.
“Nervous?” said Lyssa. She whisked the shirt over his head without waiting for a response.
Kairn was shaking as she laid her hand back against his bare chest. “Sh-shouldn’t I be?”
“Relax.” She drew closer still, brushing up against him, taunting him with her warmth. “It’s just you and me.”
Not sure where to start, he set his hands on her hips. “Lyss, it’s been ages-”
“It’s not something you forget.”
He let one trembling hand slide up her ribs. “And you’ve had, I mean there’s been, I don’t know if I-”
Lyssa caught his chin and forced him to meet her eyes. “I want you.” Kairn swallowed. “Come on, you’ve got nothing to be afraid of. Just kiss me.” He leaned in, their lips brushed. “Like you did back in the kitchen, when you thought I’d leave.” He caught her mouth with more force this time. “Like neither one of us is ever going anywhere again.”
Kairn pulled away. “You know we can’t-”
“I know, I know.” She dragged her hand up over his cheek, spread her fingers through his hair. “Just tonight. Just pretend.”
“Like that’s going to work,” said Kairn, but he was already leaning in again for another kiss.
“Won’t know if we don’t try.”
It might have been an hour later or halfway to dawn. The candles had expended themselves and the tightly drawn curtains blocked out the stars. Still struggling to find his breath and slow his heart, Kairn nestled closer to the form he couldn’t see but could feel all around him.
“So,” said Lyssa, wedged under his arm, her head heavy against his shoulder, her leg curled over his own, “what did you have to be worried about?”
At least in the dark she couldn’t see him blush. “I- I just…”
She laughed, and it rippled all up along her frame where they were pressed together, and he almost laughed at himself as it made him feel all tingly again. A hand slid down his chest as the laughter subsided, and she murmured, “Thank you for the best night I've had in a long time.”
Kairn did laugh at that. “My pleasure,” he said and found himself blushing even hotter. He caught her hand, as it paused over his heart, and gave it a squeeze. “I…I’d say ‘anytime,’ but we both know…”
Her hand slid from his chest, fingers curling back against his own. “I could be quiet,” she said. “I mean, when I leave, and-”
“Lyss…”
There was a sigh, another squeeze of his hand, then, “I’ve got a sword, you know.”
“And she’s got much, much worse.”
“She?” her head left his shoulder and he didn’t need to see to know the look on her face. “Old lover of yours?” He half expected the burnt out stump of a candle to reignite itself.
“Hardly! She’s…I don’t even know what she is.” He fumbled in the dark for her shoulders to coax her back into his arms. “Just be careful, alright?”
She was laughing again as she settled beside him. “You don’t have to worry about me.”
Kairn wound one arm tightly around her shoulders and with the other hand found her hip. “But I do.”
“It’s sweet.” There was that hand on his chest again, weaving sleepy strokes across him, and he pulled her closer. “Completely uncalled for, but sweet.”
“We’re doing this at a bar next time. I mean, not this, but, you know…”
He felt the sigh more than heard it. “I know.” She wedged her head beneath his chin. “I’m sleeping here tonight though.”
“Right.” He laid a kiss in her hair as he squeezed her again, and the sigh that came from her now seemed contented. “Not much chance I’m letting you go right now anyway.”
I would have liked to have come up with something for them to talk about at dinner, and I feel a little bad for the fade to black. But I don't think they actually hurt it with their absence. And I am so glad to finally be done with this piece.