On feminism and empowerment
So. Feminism. Why is it that smart, independent, forward thinking women, if asked, will deny categorically that they’re feminists?
I’m going to step right into the middle of some of the murkiest, most complicated and emotionally charged waters out there, and stick a lightning rod in it. Because when it comes down to it, a lot of it is about sex, and a lot more about power.
Sex is always one of those hot-button topics in our society, for all the talk about the sexual revolution and the sexualization of our society.
Shock! Sweet little Miley has grown up and is twerking onstage!
Gasp! Madonna wrote a book and called it Sex!
Horrors! There are girls running around the beach in bikinis!
Now don’t get me wrong - I’m not anti-sex. I’m also not advocating promiscuity, either. And I’m certainly not advocating legislating sexuality, because a) it’s not the government’s business, and b) people will “do it” anyway, no matter what the law says. The drive to find a mate and have sex is one of our most basic, most powerful drives, and nothing can or should stop us from following that drive. It’s what keeps the human race alive, after all.
The thing is, back in the day, a good number of so-called feminists were nothing of the sort. Instead, they were Leisure Suit Larry in drag, convinced that “freedom” and “equality” were nothing more that having the same right to have meaningless, soulless sex that men have. They wanted that transient physical pleasure without any of the emotional entanglements or responsibilities that go with sexuality and reproduction, just like the guys.
Basically, they’d drunk the Kool-Aid.
Why do I say that? Because oh-so-conveniently, their desire to have sex with zero expectations, zero attachment, zero responsibility, meant that they were actively looking for guys who wanted the same thing, but had to go to prostitutes to get before. Now, these guys could get the milk without buying the cow! All they needed to do was buy the girl a drink, chat her up a bit, and voila, they could jump in bed and no problems with them leaving as soon as the sex was done, and certainly no attempts to know each other. Emotionally-stunted man, meet emotionally-stunted woman. Have fun screwing each others’ brains out. Just pray that your condoms and your pills work, ladies, because Leisure Suit Larry’s sure not going to be around to pay child support. No, you’re going to be shouldering all the responsibility for two lives to his one, and babies are expensive and time-consuming.
The other reason that so many women today don’t want to call themselves feminists is because of power, and society’s reactions to women who seize power.
A man who steps up to the plate and leads his team or company to victory, who doesn’t put up with crap and gets things done, is admired.
A woman who does the same thing is reviled as a bitch.
Even today, women are expected to be non-confrontational, cooperative, building consensus. They’re expected to nurture their subordinates, smooth the ruffled feathers, comfort and encourage them.
They’re not supposed to crack the whip and tell Mr. Lazy to get off his ass and get some work done before they miss a critical deadline. They’re not supposed to make the hard choice to demote or fire someone who’s screwed up. Where these actions in a man might be considered tough, they’re also considered an essential part of good leadership. In a woman, it’s assumed that she’s suffering from PMS.
The double-standard is alive and well, and it’s not just blinding men - it’s doing the same to women. Many of the early suffragists and Women’s Liberation leaders were considered man-haters, despite the fact that many of them were married with children. That assumption that feminists hate men is alive and well, unfortunately, fed often by men who believe that they are being emasculated by a woman daring to stand up and demand equal treatment in the eyes of the law, their employers, and society at large. The flames are fanned even hotter by women who have tried to play the sex game by men’s rules and found themselves called sluts and whores until they become embittered by the constant parade of deadbeats and lechers that pass through their lives and their beds.
Nobody wants to be considered a bitch, just for asking for equal treatment and compensation. Nobody wants to be called filthy names because they enjoy sex. And certainly no one wants to be called a femiNazi for standing up for their rights against an establishment comprised of the very men who have the most to gain by keeping women subordinated to them.
So ladies, the next time that someone asks if you’re a feminist or something, say yes. It’s time to make it a badge of honor again, and take the reins of destiny out of the men's hands and right back into our own.
I’m going to step right into the middle of some of the murkiest, most complicated and emotionally charged waters out there, and stick a lightning rod in it. Because when it comes down to it, a lot of it is about sex, and a lot more about power.
Sex is always one of those hot-button topics in our society, for all the talk about the sexual revolution and the sexualization of our society.
Shock! Sweet little Miley has grown up and is twerking onstage!
Gasp! Madonna wrote a book and called it Sex!
Horrors! There are girls running around the beach in bikinis!
Now don’t get me wrong - I’m not anti-sex. I’m also not advocating promiscuity, either. And I’m certainly not advocating legislating sexuality, because a) it’s not the government’s business, and b) people will “do it” anyway, no matter what the law says. The drive to find a mate and have sex is one of our most basic, most powerful drives, and nothing can or should stop us from following that drive. It’s what keeps the human race alive, after all.
The thing is, back in the day, a good number of so-called feminists were nothing of the sort. Instead, they were Leisure Suit Larry in drag, convinced that “freedom” and “equality” were nothing more that having the same right to have meaningless, soulless sex that men have. They wanted that transient physical pleasure without any of the emotional entanglements or responsibilities that go with sexuality and reproduction, just like the guys.
Basically, they’d drunk the Kool-Aid.
Why do I say that? Because oh-so-conveniently, their desire to have sex with zero expectations, zero attachment, zero responsibility, meant that they were actively looking for guys who wanted the same thing, but had to go to prostitutes to get before. Now, these guys could get the milk without buying the cow! All they needed to do was buy the girl a drink, chat her up a bit, and voila, they could jump in bed and no problems with them leaving as soon as the sex was done, and certainly no attempts to know each other. Emotionally-stunted man, meet emotionally-stunted woman. Have fun screwing each others’ brains out. Just pray that your condoms and your pills work, ladies, because Leisure Suit Larry’s sure not going to be around to pay child support. No, you’re going to be shouldering all the responsibility for two lives to his one, and babies are expensive and time-consuming.
The other reason that so many women today don’t want to call themselves feminists is because of power, and society’s reactions to women who seize power.
A man who steps up to the plate and leads his team or company to victory, who doesn’t put up with crap and gets things done, is admired.
A woman who does the same thing is reviled as a bitch.
Even today, women are expected to be non-confrontational, cooperative, building consensus. They’re expected to nurture their subordinates, smooth the ruffled feathers, comfort and encourage them.
They’re not supposed to crack the whip and tell Mr. Lazy to get off his ass and get some work done before they miss a critical deadline. They’re not supposed to make the hard choice to demote or fire someone who’s screwed up. Where these actions in a man might be considered tough, they’re also considered an essential part of good leadership. In a woman, it’s assumed that she’s suffering from PMS.
The double-standard is alive and well, and it’s not just blinding men - it’s doing the same to women. Many of the early suffragists and Women’s Liberation leaders were considered man-haters, despite the fact that many of them were married with children. That assumption that feminists hate men is alive and well, unfortunately, fed often by men who believe that they are being emasculated by a woman daring to stand up and demand equal treatment in the eyes of the law, their employers, and society at large. The flames are fanned even hotter by women who have tried to play the sex game by men’s rules and found themselves called sluts and whores until they become embittered by the constant parade of deadbeats and lechers that pass through their lives and their beds.
Nobody wants to be considered a bitch, just for asking for equal treatment and compensation. Nobody wants to be called filthy names because they enjoy sex. And certainly no one wants to be called a femiNazi for standing up for their rights against an establishment comprised of the very men who have the most to gain by keeping women subordinated to them.
So ladies, the next time that someone asks if you’re a feminist or something, say yes. It’s time to make it a badge of honor again, and take the reins of destiny out of the men's hands and right back into our own.