The Adventures of Captain Jack Harkness and Rose Tyler, Action Figures: Prologue
On August 11, 2007, two small plastic people awoke surrounded by colorful paper board and several large, transparent plastic shields. They tried to introduce themselves to one another but found they did not know their own names--or much of anything.
"Like, what is this place? How did we get here?" the female said, trying to stand and finding herself quite stiff. The ground was too soft to support her. "And what do I look like?"
The female looked serious.
"You look fantastic," the male said appreciatively, raising a painted eyebrow, and then they caught one another's eyes and stared for a moment, as if a memory had been triggered.
"Say that again," said the girl.
"What? You look great. Now how about me?"
The man looked almost as serious, but with poutier lips.
"No, that isn't what you said. You said FANTASTIC."
They both shivered in their plastic clothes.
But the moment passed without revelation.
The man rolled over to attempt standing and discovered it was easier if he used one of the colorful boards. Once he was standing, he had a better view of the decorations.
"Hey, would ya look at that. It's you! And I think your name is K-9. Do you have 'PULL BACK & GO' Motion?"
The girl had no idea if she could pull back & go, as she was having difficulty managing to stand at all. She finally made her way across the soft surface to the board where the man was standing, then wrinkled her plastic nose.
"Is that what I look like? My roots are showing."
The man looked at her critically. "Yup. That's you. But don't worry about the hair. You're a real doll." This made the girl smile.
"Are you sure about the name? What's that... thing behind me, with the antennae? Is that Rose?"
"A mechanical fly or something? I don't know. More importantly, is there a picture of me around here?"
They moved two of the transparent screens with some difficulty, but didn't have to search long before they found a board with a picture of the man.
"Jack Harkness!" the man said triumphantly. "Now that's a good solid name. And I'm a captain!"
K-9 attempted to salute him good-naturedly but found her arms didn't bend quite that way. She began reading the boards in more detail.
"What's this about a CHOKING HAZARD, Captain?" she wondered aloud.
"Mmm, probably means we have to be careful when we eat," he said wisely. "What I'm more concerned about is this 'sonic blaster accessory' I'm supposed to have. Have you seen it?"
K-9 had been about to ask about the large, attractive label "DOCTOR WHO" below the Captain's name, but she let that go and helped the Captain search for his gun. While they were attempting to lift a piece of board together, suddenly a loud voice behind them made K-9 yelp and the Captain drop the board.
'HELLO MASTERS. I HAVE FOUND THE SONIC BLASTER YOU SEEK.'
They turned around, K-9 panting in her partially-unbuttoned shirt, and discovered the metal fly from the picture. Now it looked more like... they weren't sure until K-9 saw the collar around its neck.
"Hello, you cute thing, are you a doggy?" she said to it.
With a mechanical whir, the creature backed up an inch. 'THE DIMINUTIVE LABEL YOU CHOOSE IS CORRECT, MISTRESS. I AM A DOG.' Then it returned to its original point. 'I HAVE FOUND THE BLASTER. COME.'
It swung around, spun its wheels for a few seconds in a fold of the very soft ground, gained traction, and took off. The Captain and K-9 followed it back to one of the transparent screens, where the gun was secured tightly with a large piece of wire. The Captain tried to remove it but found his fingers were not dexterous enough for the job. "K-9, you want to have a go?"
The girl and the mechanical dog moved forward at the same time. The dog's head rotated to look at the girl. 'I AM K-9, MISTRESS.' If it had been anyone else, its tone would have said, "I'm surrounded by idiots."
The girl laughed. "Kay-nine," she sounded out. "Right. Well that's much better, I must be Rose!" She shook hands with the Captain as if introducing herself, then gave the dog a pat on the head. "It's nice to meet you, K-9."
The real K-9 was able to use a cutting tool to make short work of the wire securing the blaster. The Captain held the gun in his hand, looking pleased. But K-9 was not ready to relax. He swung around to face both of his new friends.
'NOW WE MUST FIND THE DOCTOR.'
The Captain and Rose looked at each other with amazement. "The Doctor!" they said simultaneously, for all at once the memories had come flooding back.