UNTITLED
TITLE: Untitled (2/3).
AUTHOR: rustyrabbit
PAIRING: JoonJun
SUMMARY: Why do you save me when I have no clue who you are?
DISCLAIMER: BEAST belongs to Play Cube!
The boy who was a stranger became my best friend somehow. I forgot how it happened but I guess the day I tried to take my own life became the day I met someone new. Doojoon is his name and his personality is way different from mine. If I would describe him, he reminds me of sunshine and butterflies on a lush green field full of flowers; a person who could change someone’s day into a better one.
He is the best thing that happened to my life, even changing me for the better. He’s like a guardian angel, my personal guide to happiness. I confided all my problems to him, from my dad to school, everything and he would always reply with a warm smile.
-
Our friendship blossomed for one and a half years until I finally decided to pluck the courage and tell Doojoon that I see him as more than a friend. I remembered how fast my heart raced moments before I met him at our usual spot in Starbucks. I also remembered how he suddenly ran off when I confessed my feelings, hands covering his face as if shielding me from his endless stream of tears.
I was confused, hurt and rejected. I could not comprehend why he deemed himself unworthy for me. I am a sad, lonely, worthless person who tried to end his life a year and a half before so what did I do to make him feel unsuited of me? He called me that night to apologize and told me to meet her at the park near her house so that we could talk things out.
The atmosphere was awkward when we met. We sat on the bench but there was an obvious invisible barrier right in between us. I tried to say something but somehow my natural introverted self showed up at the wrong moment. He broke the ice first.
“I’m sorry for just now. I didn’t mean to suddenly burst into tears and run off the shop.”
“It’s okay I guess…”
“I bet that shocked you just now; a manly guy crying and running off like a girl…”
“Haha, those are tears of happiness I suppose?”
There was an awkward silence right after I said that. It was a bad move and I really regretted for saying that. The silence was so loud that it was deafening, only the sound of the breeze and the distant crickets soothed it. I was taken by surprise when he cried so suddenly. I began to wonder if my existence only served his sorrows than to make him feel better. A wave of remorse blanketed me as I made the mental note.
“I love you too Junhyung but I just can’t…”
“Why? I thought it would be great I mean, looking at how close we were…”
“Cause I’m not good enough for you! I’m not worthy of anyone of their love! No one would want to love a dying person, no one…”
“Y-you’re dying? W-what’s all this about? Hey, that’s not something you should joke lightly abou-”
“I have leukemia and the doctor said that I only have a few more months to live…”
The words he said dropped on to me like a bomb, shattering my heart into miniscule pieces. He bit his lips and trembled slightly as if preparing to release his tears. I hugged him, the same way he did when he hugged me the first time and kissed his head. I felt wet patches forming on my shoulders that gradually become larger and his sob slowly becoming louder.
We sat in that position for quite some time until one of us decides to let go. We smiled at each other, content by the expression on the other’s face. I willed myself to make his final months the best he could ever had and to be the greatest boyfriend he glad he spent his last moments with.
A/N: I remembered how much in love I was when I wrote this. Should I change the ending? It's really terrible; it's the kind where you'd go, "WTF is the author thinking? Damn, just killed the whole fic." I don't know, I'll see if I've the mood/ time to do it. Haha~ I wanted to make Junhyung the one with cancer but then, I thought it would be funny to imagine Doojoon running off Starbucks like a princess... =P
AUTHOR: rustyrabbit
PAIRING: JoonJun
SUMMARY: Why do you save me when I have no clue who you are?
DISCLAIMER: BEAST belongs to Play Cube!
The boy who was a stranger became my best friend somehow. I forgot how it happened but I guess the day I tried to take my own life became the day I met someone new. Doojoon is his name and his personality is way different from mine. If I would describe him, he reminds me of sunshine and butterflies on a lush green field full of flowers; a person who could change someone’s day into a better one.
He is the best thing that happened to my life, even changing me for the better. He’s like a guardian angel, my personal guide to happiness. I confided all my problems to him, from my dad to school, everything and he would always reply with a warm smile.
-
Our friendship blossomed for one and a half years until I finally decided to pluck the courage and tell Doojoon that I see him as more than a friend. I remembered how fast my heart raced moments before I met him at our usual spot in Starbucks. I also remembered how he suddenly ran off when I confessed my feelings, hands covering his face as if shielding me from his endless stream of tears.
I was confused, hurt and rejected. I could not comprehend why he deemed himself unworthy for me. I am a sad, lonely, worthless person who tried to end his life a year and a half before so what did I do to make him feel unsuited of me? He called me that night to apologize and told me to meet her at the park near her house so that we could talk things out.
The atmosphere was awkward when we met. We sat on the bench but there was an obvious invisible barrier right in between us. I tried to say something but somehow my natural introverted self showed up at the wrong moment. He broke the ice first.
“I’m sorry for just now. I didn’t mean to suddenly burst into tears and run off the shop.”
“It’s okay I guess…”
“I bet that shocked you just now; a manly guy crying and running off like a girl…”
“Haha, those are tears of happiness I suppose?”
There was an awkward silence right after I said that. It was a bad move and I really regretted for saying that. The silence was so loud that it was deafening, only the sound of the breeze and the distant crickets soothed it. I was taken by surprise when he cried so suddenly. I began to wonder if my existence only served his sorrows than to make him feel better. A wave of remorse blanketed me as I made the mental note.
“I love you too Junhyung but I just can’t…”
“Why? I thought it would be great I mean, looking at how close we were…”
“Cause I’m not good enough for you! I’m not worthy of anyone of their love! No one would want to love a dying person, no one…”
“Y-you’re dying? W-what’s all this about? Hey, that’s not something you should joke lightly abou-”
“I have leukemia and the doctor said that I only have a few more months to live…”
The words he said dropped on to me like a bomb, shattering my heart into miniscule pieces. He bit his lips and trembled slightly as if preparing to release his tears. I hugged him, the same way he did when he hugged me the first time and kissed his head. I felt wet patches forming on my shoulders that gradually become larger and his sob slowly becoming louder.
We sat in that position for quite some time until one of us decides to let go. We smiled at each other, content by the expression on the other’s face. I willed myself to make his final months the best he could ever had and to be the greatest boyfriend he glad he spent his last moments with.
A/N: I remembered how much in love I was when I wrote this. Should I change the ending? It's really terrible; it's the kind where you'd go, "WTF is the author thinking? Damn, just killed the whole fic." I don't know, I'll see if I've the mood/ time to do it. Haha~ I wanted to make Junhyung the one with cancer but then, I thought it would be funny to imagine Doojoon running off Starbucks like a princess... =P