Day 05 - Your definition of love, in great detail
Dear diary,
Today was the day that it happened.
Dear diary,
Today was the day that it happened. I want to say that I've been minding my own business and it ran smack into me, catching me completely off guard but really, who are we kidding. I've been waiting for this moment since Grade 3 when I asked Jackie to go out on a date with me during Christmas break. I have had moments where I have been in love before but this is real. Not that the other times weren't but this is the grown-up, as seen on TV, completely magical moment of falling in love.
I've had an idea that this dance we had been doing would leave us to that moment, I just never believed that he would stay in the moment. I figured something would spook him, his sexuality would suddenly change, or tell me I'm on some sort of hidden camera reality show and my friends set this whole thing up for a laugh. Instead we were laying on my bed watching this bad Ukrainian drama when he rolled over and faced me and said, "This is fantastically terrible."
I replied to him, "Of course it is, but you didn't want to watch that romcom I brought home, so this was your pick."
"You can't call this MY pick just because I didn't want to watch another Jennifer Lopez-Aniston-Love-Etc romantic crappidy."
"Tough," was all I could get in before he was on top of me like whipped cream on a hot waffle. He started with soft punches and quickly launched a secondary tickle attack. I managed to hook one of my legs under his arm and throw him back onto the bed (a moved that very easily could have knocked him unconscious.) Before he had a chance to react, I was on top of him sliding between his legs pinning his flailing arms down on the bed. Of course, his legs were wrapped around my body and his ab strength easily out matched me he has rolled back over and now had me completely pinned down. Instead of causing me any more torture he leaned in and kissed me on the lips softly. We have kissed dozens of dozens of time but this time was different.
The kiss reminded me of the time he brought me soup to work when I had a terrible cold and couldn't go home. Or the time he surprised me a candlelit dinner at home after working a twelve-hour day. And the time that we had walked all night talking before sharing our first kiss down on the beach before the sun decided to wake up and bathe us in morning light. It was honest, sincere, romantic, and genuine.
"Ryan, I love you."
Four words. Knocked me out of reality and suddenly my mind flashed forward to the day we would move in together and deciding where to put our furniture. My mind went further and I could see myself marrying this man in front of all of my friends who were, at last, thankful that I was someone else's life-long problem. Then on our fifth anniversary we jet off to England for a two-week trip where we fall in love all over again. But generally in every moment my brain envisions there he is, standing by my side, partner in crime 110% of the time. Never afraid to challenge me or push me when I get scared. And never forgets to remind me how special I am.
Even though we have our fights like the one last week when I refused to try the new Indian restaurant he was dying to visit out of my fear of what the curry-infused food would do to my stomach we always seem to come back to common ground. Though I'm not always the bad guy. There was the time he left his cell phone in the car, because he didn't want to carry it in his shorts, and he forgot to pick me up after my dental surgery. I had slept in the waiting room for over an hour before he remembered and picked up a very groggy, embarrassed version of myself. He made it up to me though by sitting through an entire half season of Glee for the rest of the day while he spoon fed me the smoothest vanilla ice cream money could buy.
Slowly I float back to reality and he staring at me with a blank, nervous stare. I figure I have kept him waiting long enough and sneak in a kiss with a silly grin and reply, "I love you too," and happy relief floods his face and we're kissing again and somehow I feel like I have been building a 10,000 piece puzzle and I just clicked the last two pieces together.
There is just something about this guy that just makes me feel like a better version of myself. Like he's filling in all my cracks and smoothing out all the wrinkles. *swoon*
Anyways D, I'm going to get some sleep. Early day tomorrow. No doubt, he'll have already made coffee and started breakfast by the time I'm out of the shower - and it's his day off tomorrow. How did I get this lucky?
-R
To see a list of the days click here.
Today was the day that it happened.
Dear diary,
Today was the day that it happened. I want to say that I've been minding my own business and it ran smack into me, catching me completely off guard but really, who are we kidding. I've been waiting for this moment since Grade 3 when I asked Jackie to go out on a date with me during Christmas break. I have had moments where I have been in love before but this is real. Not that the other times weren't but this is the grown-up, as seen on TV, completely magical moment of falling in love.
I've had an idea that this dance we had been doing would leave us to that moment, I just never believed that he would stay in the moment. I figured something would spook him, his sexuality would suddenly change, or tell me I'm on some sort of hidden camera reality show and my friends set this whole thing up for a laugh. Instead we were laying on my bed watching this bad Ukrainian drama when he rolled over and faced me and said, "This is fantastically terrible."
I replied to him, "Of course it is, but you didn't want to watch that romcom I brought home, so this was your pick."
"You can't call this MY pick just because I didn't want to watch another Jennifer Lopez-Aniston-Love-Etc romantic crappidy."
"Tough," was all I could get in before he was on top of me like whipped cream on a hot waffle. He started with soft punches and quickly launched a secondary tickle attack. I managed to hook one of my legs under his arm and throw him back onto the bed (a moved that very easily could have knocked him unconscious.) Before he had a chance to react, I was on top of him sliding between his legs pinning his flailing arms down on the bed. Of course, his legs were wrapped around my body and his ab strength easily out matched me he has rolled back over and now had me completely pinned down. Instead of causing me any more torture he leaned in and kissed me on the lips softly. We have kissed dozens of dozens of time but this time was different.
The kiss reminded me of the time he brought me soup to work when I had a terrible cold and couldn't go home. Or the time he surprised me a candlelit dinner at home after working a twelve-hour day. And the time that we had walked all night talking before sharing our first kiss down on the beach before the sun decided to wake up and bathe us in morning light. It was honest, sincere, romantic, and genuine.
"Ryan, I love you."
Four words. Knocked me out of reality and suddenly my mind flashed forward to the day we would move in together and deciding where to put our furniture. My mind went further and I could see myself marrying this man in front of all of my friends who were, at last, thankful that I was someone else's life-long problem. Then on our fifth anniversary we jet off to England for a two-week trip where we fall in love all over again. But generally in every moment my brain envisions there he is, standing by my side, partner in crime 110% of the time. Never afraid to challenge me or push me when I get scared. And never forgets to remind me how special I am.
Even though we have our fights like the one last week when I refused to try the new Indian restaurant he was dying to visit out of my fear of what the curry-infused food would do to my stomach we always seem to come back to common ground. Though I'm not always the bad guy. There was the time he left his cell phone in the car, because he didn't want to carry it in his shorts, and he forgot to pick me up after my dental surgery. I had slept in the waiting room for over an hour before he remembered and picked up a very groggy, embarrassed version of myself. He made it up to me though by sitting through an entire half season of Glee for the rest of the day while he spoon fed me the smoothest vanilla ice cream money could buy.
Slowly I float back to reality and he staring at me with a blank, nervous stare. I figure I have kept him waiting long enough and sneak in a kiss with a silly grin and reply, "I love you too," and happy relief floods his face and we're kissing again and somehow I feel like I have been building a 10,000 piece puzzle and I just clicked the last two pieces together.
There is just something about this guy that just makes me feel like a better version of myself. Like he's filling in all my cracks and smoothing out all the wrinkles. *swoon*
Anyways D, I'm going to get some sleep. Early day tomorrow. No doubt, he'll have already made coffee and started breakfast by the time I'm out of the shower - and it's his day off tomorrow. How did I get this lucky?
-R
To see a list of the days click here.