i simply cannot understand why or how someone can have such a strong hold over me, mentally. its not fucking fair, i dont like this, not at all...and when im thoroughly convinced that...no wait, let me rephrase that statement...i hate the fact that i have been manipulated into believing that he still loves me one day, and then the next its as if ( Read more... )

i just had one of the greatest moments of my life, i almost feel accepted by the one i love, unless of course he just kissed me out of pity...oh well for right now, im not going to think into it, and just let myself be happy for the time being, and if it was for pity than let me cry tomorrow...as for right now, not one fucking person is going to ( Read more... )

simply because you can breathe ( Read more... )

i have never been this hurt by someone so close to me before. my best friend cant even tell me that he has some bitch kissing him all the time, i have to hear it from everyone else. that hurts more than i ever expected it to. ive know him for 5 years, and during those five years if we werent going out we were best friends. i dont know what to ( Read more... )

yesh well im at marc house, with reshan and well...marc, obviously. andrea is totally getting into the video game, shes all hoppin and shit..its funny...well i dont have a lot to say that people havent already found out...(stevennnnnn) okay well i will see all of you later

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this is for you steveo.....for serious

okay, well the weather out here is absolutly terrif...hah, it almost makes me wish that i had let steve teach me how to skate so that i would have something to do...and i mean i have my vans and perfect weather and shit, all i need now is talent..oh well. i miss my friends...fuck i miss em even when im in az....especially the ones in california ( Read more... )

okay this entire entry is for you steven...since my email is being an asshole and i cant post comments since i havent confirmed whatever it is that 'they' (the mysterious 'they'....its everywhere...they're watching..i dunno) want me to confirm...so yes...steven, i really do wish that you were with me last night because i know i wouldnt be ( Read more... )

do you have any idea how fucking heartbreaking it is to watch your best of friends just whither away....it fucking kills...ive been squeeky clean (like a rubber duck) for over 2 weeks and now that i come over to this house, i see it in a whole new light...and the second i walk through that door i cant help but burst into tears ( Read more... )

counting the ways i fucked up today...im sorry guys