Title: Boku wa Otouto ni Koi o Suru
Author:
REMINDER!Written for:
tsuchi8562Beta: Will be revealed together with authors.
Pairing/Group: Sakuraiba, mentioned Aimiya/Arashi
Rating/Warnings: NC17, incest
Length: 4065 words (one shot)
Summary: If I can’t fall in love with him then why did God make us to meet in the first place? Furthermore, born from the same mother… on the same day…
Disclaimer: The story based on the movie Boku wa Imōto ni Koi o Suru and Arashi is definitely not mine, no matter how desperately I want them :D
Note: I hope I fulfill
tsuchi8562’s request, although I couldn’t fit Jun and Ohno anywhere, Nino also only got mentioned randomly. Even so, I hope it’s acceptable enough~ ^^v
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I didn’t know how it started; I didn’t know how it grew beautifully like the flower field we often went together before; I didn’t know when I started to think that his smile was my treasure and his tears could scatter my heart into pieces. I didn’t realize everything until my heart flutters whenever he laughed over his friends’ jokes, or rather laughed over everything, that’s his nature anyway. Or when my heart beats get faster whenever he leaned on my shoulder as it was his regular place for a short nap. It was rather obvious when I started to draw myself away from him, yet I still shadowed him whenever he acted too kind toward someone. Because he just could get anyone under his spell, and seriously… Everyone could just fall for him so hard. Including me, maybe. Me… His brother, even more… his twin.
It was too much for me, to share the same room with the person I desired for. I found myself thinking to jump on him when he was sleeping, defenseless. When it’s too much for me to bear I couldn’t even jerk off neither in my room, nor bathroom, since we only have one shared bathroom in the house. I don’t want my mom catch me red handed when I jerk off over my very own twin.
That was wrong… so wrong…
So sinfully wrong…
And disgusting… maybe…
But I have no power to fight it. I tried, desperately, to kill my feeling by sleeping with some girls, and guys, but I ended up calling my partner with wrong name, Masaki. Then I would get a slap after I came if I was lucky, sometime, they kicked me out of bed immediately. Fortunately I never slept with anyone from our high school so no one noticed that they were substitute because I couldn’t have my own way with my brother.
“Sho-chan? Are you listening?” A pair of hands waved in front of me as the owner pouted behind them. “You are not!”
“I… Sorry, what did you say just now?” I questioned him as munching the forgotten omelet piece in my mouth.
He pouted even more but started to explain again, “Can you keep it a secret from mom? I plan to go home a little late today, Nino asked me out this afternoon… Mom won’t let me but she and dad aren’t home. So, can I?”
“What will you do with him anyway?” I raised my eyebrow in question.
“I don’t know,” he shrugged and clamped my sausage between his chopsticks, “he told me it’s a secret.”
“Then ask him, what will you guys do.”
“Sho-chan, it’s not called a secret for nothing! It’s called a secret because other people are not supposed to know about it.”
“I don’t care Masaki, just ask!”
I glared at my brother as his stubborn gaze pierced back at me. He inherited our mom’s eyes. Whenever he stared at me with that kind of gaze I feel like getting nagged by her. But the fact that our faces were totally different was out of question. He has our mom’s features, long eyelashes, big brown eyes, full lips, and some wrinkles formed in the corner of his eyes whenever he smiles, while I look just like our dad. Our personalities are totally the opposite too. He’s cheerful, jumpy, bubbly and friendly, good at sports, bad in other subjects beside sports, and a bit clumsy, but clumsiness was just one of his charms also.
I got the brain. I didn’t mean to brag but I always get first rank in school, totally fail at sports and arts though. Other than that, I was unfriendly and a loner. I never have friends except Masaki’s friends. But he always drags so many people along and that made me almost know and known by the whole school.
I wonder how we were born to be twins yet we have to be so different in everything? I thought twins are supposed to be… well… same in almost everything?
“You have no right to order me around Sho!” he pointed at me with his chopsticks as he continued angrily, “Why can’t I have a close friend when you have bunch of sex buddies!”
“So that is all about?! Sex?!” I hissed dangerously, although we were eating in the rooftop but it was not wise to talk about sex loudly I think.
“No! It’s about you! You ignored me all the time! You’re eating with me just because mom orders you to do so! I don’t know what I did wrong to deserve such treatment from you! And you slept with so many people like… like… I know nothing about it! I’m not blind Sho!”
“It’s not your business if I slept with other people,” I turned away from his gaze, trying to look indifferent.
“Then whatever will I do with Nino is not your business also!”
I turned back at him and found his eyes were glistening with tears but I just couldn’t stop my mouth from hurting him, I knew it was hurting him, “Is that your plan? To sleep with him?”
And I was lucky he didn’t slap me or hit me because I deserved it, really… He just closed his bento box and gazed back at me right when a drop of tears fell on his check, “Yes, if that makes you happy, Sho-chan.”
Masaki turned back without glancing at me anymore, even more, he ignored me for the rest of the day. It felt like the other way around, usually I was the one who shrugged him away although he will get back to cling on me. Though now I understand how lonely it is without someone waiting to go home together. I already missed Masaki’s back that was waiting for me in front of the school gate. Although we were classmate but I already warned him to not wait inside or in front of the class, stated that we aren’t elementary students anymore. Masaki didn’t give up though; instead he waited for me in front of the gate. Yet today…
Masaki always sticks with me, he is spoilt and a cry baby that make all responsibilities fall on me. I need to remind him about homework, uniforms, books, schedules, and even lunch. Yet there was one day when he told me he already finished his homework because his girlfriend reminded him about it, I couldn’t stop the weird feeling that was pressed over my chest. I shook it out of my mind and walked back home alone. I expected that he would just go directly to meet Nino. Yet when I reached home he was sitting in the living room, didn’t even bother to reply my ‘tadaima’.
I was spending my spare time by reading some random economic books when Masaki stepped in to our room. Since we have bunk beds and being the one that fell easily even on a smooth road, he got the bottom one. He begged mom to give him the top one but she will never agree. My gaze followed his every move although I hid it well behind the book, he stripped himself boldly and that made my lower part twitch harshly to which I expected to jerk off later, maybe it’s good that he will go out soon…
The view was fast gone as now he is wearing his thin brown t-shirt, present from me for our birthday last year. Why in the hell he has to wear that one? To mock me?! That I was desperate about him yet couldn’t claim him as mine?! The rage inside me builds even more when I realized that he probably won’t be the same Masaki when he was back. Not like a sex would change everything about him, not like he positively would have sex with Ninomiya since the later only had interest in games, but I knew if they would… something will change after that. Maybe he won’t need me anymore since he could just cling over his new boyfriend. Then all things flooded my head, how will they do it? What if Masaki moans that person’s name… Damn it!
“Masaki, don’t go…” my voice might just sound like a whisper but his hand stopped absurdly on the door knob.
“Why? Because you will tell mom about it?” he sneered, “Go ahead, I don’t care!”
I climbed down and jumped half way to face him, “No…”
I didn’t know what was it that pervaded me, or what shit I was thinking about when my hands grasp his wrists like both were made to hold tight, and corner him to the door, “I won’t tell mom, if you promise you won’t tell her too…”
“Tell her about what?” he stared back at me with the arrogant gaze.
I might go insane when I closed our distance, no… I’m insanely in love with him, I’ve already got insane, totally. His eyes open wide in confusion, his lips parted, everything went in slow and silent motion. I could see his impeccably soft skins, his long eyelashes, his mole; every millimeter of his face was beyond my reach finally.
“Telling her about this…”
I whispered and caught his lips between mine. He gasped as both hands released from my grasp and try to push my chest to back off. But everything was too late. It was too late…
I couldn’t recall the last time I kissed him when we were kids, but it’s definitely different. With all my passion that was burning inside, I almost omit my sanity. I grasped his nape to deepen the kiss while my other hand restrained him from any moving. His lips were soft and there was scent of orange candy invading my taste when I licked the corner of his lips. I tilted my head a bit to taste more when a desperate moan left his lips. “Nnnn… Sho…”
He pushed me again, but I was positive this time he did it hesitatingly. But we needed to breathe… He needed to breathe. I gave him a small space by breaking the kiss, with he still in my embrace, like I would lose him right away if I let go.
He breathed heavily, “Sho…”
“It’s not brotherly kiss, it’s not a kiss to stop you for going... Well, it is in some way but…” Then everything looked so clear for me, I just kissed my own brother and it felt so unrighteous-ly amazing, for me at least. He looked pale while trying to normalize his breath.
For me…
I didn’t even know his feelings yet…
“Ma-Masaki… I’m sorry…”
Suddenly he frowned and I was too late to catch the sadness in his eyes, “You are sorry? You didn’t mean it?”
“I mean it!”
“Mean what?” he narrowed his eyes while questioning.
“That… that… Masaki, I can’t let you go, I don’t want you to do whatever you will do with Ninomiya! I want you to be happy, really, but… I know I might be sick to feel this way toward you and you might feel disgust on me… I understand…”
“You don’t…” he shook his head as he continued, “What’s your feeling?”
“Well, I kissed you; don’t you think it’s obvious?”
“Said by someone who has thousand of sex buddies, very convincing…”
I found we were there, in our room where we slept together for longest time ever, with all evidences that we were brothers and twins, but we were talking about anything except our… What? Desires? Passions? Love?
“I love you,” my heart was beating fast, in a good way, when I finally said it to him. “Not only as brother but also as a lover. I don’t want you to see me as your twin, but as a man who fell in love with you. I’ve been trying so hard to give up the feeling for you but it’s not that easy when the first thing I see every morning is the person I desire so much. I want to kiss you, to hug you, to have my own way with you. I don’t know what got into me that now I’m confessing to you without even caring about all sins I’ve made by letting this feeling grow stronger day by day. I just… love you…”
“So much… that I can’t control it anymore…”
“But you drew yourself away from me…” his voice was too soft, almost like whispering.
“For your own sake, you couldn’t be happy to find your twin jump on you suddenly…”
“Wrong, it depends…” Goosebumps creep all over my skins when his hands slipped into my t-shirt and traced the skins under, “Because the only thing your twin wants to do at the moment is kissing you…”
“Ma-Masaki…” he leaned on again to drown me into another kiss. A kiss that answered every single worry in my heart, he loves me too!
I don’t understand why, I don’t even care, this kiss was the only matter at that time. To hell about our parents, friends, or whatever. It doesn’t matter anymore. Even if the world is against us, it doesn’t matter, as long as I have him in my embrace.
His lips parted as I freely invade into his mouth, the taste of orange spread over my mouth when I felt his tongue sweep over mine. It’s crazy that I’ve wasted years to find someone to replace him over a fact that he was irreplaceable. All kisses, pleasures that I got before were forgotten, those were nothing compared to making out with Masaki. Nothing equal with his lips against mine, or his trembled hands that clutched on my t-shirt, or his moans when I pinched his nipple over the shirt. With a slight suck on my bottom lips he freed me as now his lips were wet and red from our make out. I guided him to his bed and climbed on top of him.
I can’t stop this, I won’t if I know he wants me too. But I voiced it out just to make everything clear, “Do you want it?”
He traced my nape with his palm while throwing another question, “Do you?”
“I don’t…” I kissed him lightly and continued, “If you don’t…”
“You didn’t answer my question!”
“I would, if you answer mine.”
I almost heard him snort but in the end he just rolled his eyes in frustration, “Cheater! Why did you have to ask me that anyway! It’s not like you hav-”
“I want it,” I cut him fast, “I want you…”
He stared at me flabbergasted, it somehow funny when he look like he wanted to bury himself in a hole as he answered, “I want you too…”
That was all I needed to kiss him all over again while my hand brushing his warm skin. There is no Sho and Masaki, no brothers, we were just two men that fell in love with each other, searching a way to prove it and own each others. My hand traced his waist slowly, on my way to pull off his shirt when I felt his hand on my wrist, restraining me from stripping him, “What?”
“Can we do it with clothes on?”
“Are you kidding me?” it wasn’t like I couldn’t be aroused if we did it clothes on, since I am positive I can just come with grinding on him like this, but… Seriously?
“Why? It’s not like I never saw you naked, and you just changed clothes in front of me for Christ’s sake!”
“But… you never saw it…”
“I did se-”
“You never, Sho-chan. You never see my condition when I was thinking about you, it’s embarrassing…” He covered his face, a typical gesture when he felt terribly embarrassed. But I couldn’t care less, he wanted me before, as much as I wanted him and it made my heart explode. I get his hands off from a beet red face that shyly looked back at me.
“It’s not… It’s not embarrassing if I feel the same. Masaki… Now, I’m so greedy, I want you and I want you to know that I desperately want you… And I want you to want me too…”
His palm left my wrist to caress my cheek, he remarked slowly, “Mine…”
“Yours, and yours only…” he let me take off his t-shirt and throw it somewhere on the floor. His eyes never left me, those doe-eyes that always make me gone crazy. I captured his lips again as now my hands were campaigning down his chest and pinching the dark buds. Masaki moaned down his throat as my tongue trace his earlobe.
“Sho-chan…” his eyes were half closed when I peeked from his jaw line. He pushed my hips down eagerly and rubbed my covered bulge on his tight. I was marking his neck when I felt his fingers wrapping my member and that stopped me from kissing and biting for a brief moment. But he got me wrong, feeling worried and embarrassed he gazed at me, “I… I’m sorry… I thought it would make you feel good…”
The warmth around my member was almost gone when he pulled his hand back. I managed to catch it before it moved too far, “Be careful, I might come fast if you’re too good, and I prefer to come a bit later…”
I put his hand back on my member and can’t stop groaning from the touch. I felt his finger traced the peak of my member slowly, caressing and teasing at the same time, “Oh God… Masaki…”
He smiled slyly as his hand left my member again and entered my sight to show me my leak between his fingers. Masaki licked his fingers clean yet wetting it with saliva at the same time without breaking our eyes contact. Such a temptation!
I pinned him roughly to the bed and kissed him hungrily while eagerly stripped the last fabric from his body. “Sho-chan, I’ve never done it before…”
I threw his boxer to the floor, along with our scattered clothes. It’s not the first time I see him naked, but… Stark naked Masaki with wide open legs, showing the obvious erection between them is not something that I could see as ordinary. “I know.”
“And you did…” his whisper almost inaudible.
I tilted his chin to make our eyes met, “Not without screaming your name…”
I like the sudden color change of his face when I said it bluntly, but that shy expression suddenly changed into pain when I started to invaded his cavity with my fingers to prepare him. He gripped my arm immediately and the next second, his nails dig on my shoulder. His eyes closed and a tear ran down his cheek. I froze, and right away my whole body started to tremble, the guilty feeling flooded my heart. He was hurt…
“Sho-chan?” his hand on my cheek brought me back to reality, “Are you okay?”
Funny, but I think he got our position reversed; that supposed to be my question for him. I slicked out my fingers and hold his member, “Sho-chan, wait! What? Ahh…”
“Sho-chan! No no no! Ahhh… What the hell ahhhh are you doing! Oh God! Ahhhh…”
Suddenly he grabbed the base of his cock, and seconds later I understood that he did that to restrain himself from coming. “What the heck are you doing?!” he shouted at me while trying to catch his breath.
“I don’t want to hurt you, Masaki…”
He glared although the understanding hasn’t hitting him, but slowly his eyes changed, “Are you stupid thinking to not enter me tonight?!”
“Masa-”
“Quiet! Of course it hurts, it’s my first time for heaven’s sake! That’s why I want to do it with you! Either we do it or stop it now!”
Really, what am I supposed to do to him?
I leaned down and hugged him, tightly, “I love you, Masaki… I really do. I’m so crazy about you… I love you…”
I traced his jaw with my lips before I positioned myself, with a bit force I entered him. It took all my sanity to not pounce on him right away. While the sensation of his tight wall wrapping my member cast me to a feeling that I never experience before, it was almost impossible to not do anything. I wanted to feel more and more and that burn down all my endurance. His eyes were still tightly closed and both hands clutched to the bed sheet like it was his life line. I linked our hands and kissed him to ease his pain, but after few minutes of tongues battle, it’s really stupid to not doing anything, “Shall I try… to… errr… move?”
He nodded and put his hands on my shoulders for support. I pulled out my member, leaving only my tip inside, and pushed in again, gained a loud moan from Masaki. We moving with that pace until a miraculous move from me made him squealed and locked his legs around me, pulled me toward him more and that almost make me unable to move. I hit it. Masaki’s expression erased all my worries, it seemed that the pain has gone as he pulled me into a deep kiss, made our forgotten lips savored each other along with every thrust.
“Sho… Hhhh… Sho…”
His back arched in weird shape as my thrust getting fast and savage, our irregular breaths and moans filled the room. My hand pumped his neglected member and soon his hand joined mine to get more friction.
“I’m close!” his voice muffled between our kiss as I tried to make a motion that close to nod. It couldn’t be sinful… Everything about him was like smithers of puzzles that completed me, perfectly. His touch, his kiss, his moan, everything was just like what I wished, even more beautiful than that. This couldn’t be sinful…
I groaned loudly when his muscle clenched around me as he was coming in our hands and stomachs, not long after I felt spasm on my abdomen that sent goose bump all over my skins and brought me to the edge.
My own sperm filled his den while having his fingers cupping my cheek and brought me into a breathless kiss, even before I pulled out from him. When he finally let me go I tumbled to his side and soon he leaned into my embrace and buried his face to my chest. The dream world almost pulled me in when suddenly I heard his soft sobbing.
“Are you hurt?!” Alarmed, I pushed him a bit to face him properly. He shook his head although tears still flooded his cheeks.
“What is it, Masaki? Don’t scare me! Tell me, what is it?”
“What if mom knows?”
Now I knew his worries, the same worries that got forgotten for the best time in my life. I pull him closer again and breathed on his hair, “Shhh… she won’t… It’s okay, Masaki, don’t be scared… I will bear everything, you didn’t do anything wrong…”
I still can feel his trembling body against my chest when I brought our face to the same level, “Listen Masaki, do you love me?”
He nodded immediately.
I smiled as the warm feeling filled my heart, spread to every cell in my body, “Do you want me?”
He nodded again.
“Then nothing else matters, we will work it out… Do you trust me?”
He nodded as whispered, “I trust you.”
I traced his lips with my own and whispered in between, “Sleep, if you let me kiss you for too long we won’t get any sleep before mom’s home…”
He laughed and gave me a small peck again before leaned closer and we fell into a deep slumber together.
~*~
Our mother still was busying herself with eggrolls in the kitchen while Masaki was finishing his breakfast. I can’t help but smile when he was smiling in content and reported to our mom about how nice everything in his bowl is. Mother just answered him with ‘yes yes~’ her eyes didn’t leave the stove at all, though she asked me out of blue, “Why don’t you go to school first since you’ve finished your food, Sho?”
“I’m waiting for Masaki,” I shrugged when our mother looked at me, eyebrows almost knitted to each other.
“How rare…” she commented but nonetheless laughed afterwards, maybe she thought I finally can get along well with Masaki.
That wasn’t wrong though, we do get along well… too well…
As well as our firmly locking hands under the table…
-FIN-