[Sakuraiba Exchange 2021] 明日へのプロミス / Promise of tomorrow - Part 2
Part 1
After the ‘not-date’ night, their dynamics shifted slightly and sometimes it made really hard for Aiba to remind himself of reality and keep his hopes in check. Because from then on there were more shared dinners, at least a few times every week, and when their schedule allowed, more shared movies. Sho took Aiba’s words about him paying for groceries to heart, but insisted on going together, saying that since Aiba was the one actually cooking, he knew what they needed better, which made his presence imperative - Sho’s words, not Aiba’s! The whole thing was so domestic, almost intimate that it made Aiba’s heart clench painfully, but at the same time he couldn’t help himself wanting to indulge every minute of this illusion, knowing it was only a matter of time until Sho’s persistent calls and texts would wear down Nino’s patience and he’d give in and allow Sho to return his own home…
Aiba pouted at the clock on the wall one last time before he decided it was pointless to wait any longer. Though Sho had said he’d be a bit late, he’d promised he’d be back on time for another dinner-and-movie session. ‘Still not a date!’ But it was getting late; long past the time they agreed on. It happened several times before that Sho was late but by now, it became obvious that their plans for today were cancelled. Especially since Aiba would have to leave at 5 AM the next morning for a location shoot.
His appetite gone, Aiba packed up the dinner he made, putting everything in the fridge, and decided it was time for him to go to sleep already.
He understood that Sho had probably been held up at work or something had come up last minute. In their line of work, it happened a lot. But in light of the recent changes between them, Aiba would’ve expected Sho to at least let him know if he had to cancel their plans. He took a deep breath, then let it out slowly, hoping it would keep him from crying. He knew he should stop expecting anything from Sho. He didn’t owe Aiba anything. He knew it. They might be friends, colleagues, but only that; this living arrangement that gave Aiba all these weird ideas and hope was forced on them by Nino. It wasn’t Sho’s own choice. Aiba knew it all. He really did!
Maybe… maybe it was time for him to call Nino and make him end this façade, Aiba thought. The only thing he achieved with these past months was the strengthening of Aiba’s belief that pursuing anything with Sho was impossible, and all that waited for him at the end of this road was heartbreak…
He was on his way to his bedroom when the front door was finally opened by Sho.
“Oh, you’re still awake! I know I’m a bit late despite what we agreed on but we can still watch that movie, right?” He asked, smiling as if everything was alright. As if he didn’t make Aiba wait almost three hours! As if he didn’t just make it pointless for Aiba to go out of his way to prepare Sho’s favorite for dinner! As if…
Aiba counted back from ten in his head. He didn’t want to snap at Sho. He felt too tired to fight with him.
“I can’t. I have a location shoot for Doubutsuen tomorrow so I have to get up early. But you go ahead. Good night, Sho-chan,” he said avoiding Sho’s eyes, before he retreated to his room.
He didn’t see the smile disappear from Sho’s face, nor the disappointed look in his eyes that followed him until his bedroom door was closed…
Unsurprisingly, Aiba was exhausted by the time he arrived home after the Doubutsuen shooting the next day. His body was sore all over. The dog he worked with was especially scared of the shampooing and tried everything to escape from the moment Aiba put him in the sink. It took almost two hours just to wash him and by the time they were finished, Aiba’s clothes were drenched and his arms were completely covered in scratches. Aiba wished for nothing else but a proper bath and his bed.
“Tadaima…” he mumbled when he entered his apartment.
“Are you angry with me?”
Aiba jumped in surprise, stumbling back into the door behind him.
“Sho-chan…” he breathed out, shocked. “What are you doing here?”
Sho stood at the entrance as if he was waiting for Aiba. He was frowning, yet looked confused at the same time. Like he was anxious to hear Aiba’s answer. Like it bothered him that Aiba might reply with a ‘yes’. Aiba didn’t get it. Sho was never bothered with what Aiba might think or feel, wasn’t he?
“Are you angry with me?” Sho repeated insistently.
“What are you talking about?” Aiba asked back, too tired to play guessing.
“For yesterday. Are you angry with me?”
Aiba swallowed back the lump that started to form in his throat. Did Sho notice? Did he act weird last night? Aiba wasn’t sure. But he sure wasn’t prepared to have this conversation with Sho right now.
“Are you angry with me ’cause I didn’t tell you I’d be late? I’m sorry. Yesterday’s dinner… you worked a lot on it and I made your efforts go to waste. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to… to blow you off… Things got messed up and we had to re-do the shoot yesterday. With everything going on, I forgot… I didn’t mean to…” Sho explained in a rushed manner, almost desperately.
“It’s fine, Sho-chan,” Aiba interrupted him. He didn’t want to hear any more. Sho never meant it, it was just the way he was. Aiba knew it but he was also tired of hearing this when nothing ever changed. “You had work, I understand. I’m not angry,” he said the words Sho wanted to hear, hoping to end this conversation as soon as possible.
As Aiba stepped past him, Sho grabbed his arm, pulling him back. Tired as he was, Aiba stumbled right into Sho’s arms.
“Even if you’re not angry… You’re hurt. I’ve hurt you…” It wasn’t a question what Sho whispered, his eyes clouded with regret.
‘Too close!’ Aiba’s mind screamed at him but he couldn’t find the strength to step away.
“I’m not…” he tried to deny it but the words got stuck in his throat when Sho raised his hand to cup his face.
“I’m so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you… You have to believe me… I…”
The shrill, insistent ringing of the doorbell broke the strange spell that fell over them.
Aiba pushed Sho away rather forcefully and hurried to open the door.
Jun was the last person he expected to find there, especially since he looked quite annoyed. Almost angry.
“Matsujun, what are you…?” Aiba started but then he spotted Nino trying to hide behind Jun and the situation became a bit clearer in an instant.
“I can’t believe it!” Jun said instead of a greeting as he pushed his way in, kicking his shoes off. Nino was following him, obviously unhappy for having to be there. “Just how stupid the two of you are for letting this brat orchestrate this disaster waiting to happen?!”
Sho seemed to snap out of his shock faster than Aiba.
“It’s not like he gave us a choice or anything! He stole my keys!” Sho argued back. Despite the initial shock after seeing Jun barging in, he seemed more annoyed than anything, and he was not someone who was willing to take such a dressing-down silently. Especially when it wasn’t deserved one bit.
“So? He’s smaller than a shrimp, don’t tell me you can’t take your keys back from him?!” Jun huffed.
“Oh, so instead of sharing Aiba’s place for a while, you’d rather have me strangling Nino in a public bar for my keys? Sure, that would’ve been a spectacular sight…” Sho crossed his arms over his chest, looking at Jun as if he lost his mind.
“Of course not…” Jun admitted, reeling back a bit. “But obviously neither of you thought about what kind of media shit-storm it would be if the tabloids get a wind of this, now did you? The two of you living together… Did you think about how it could affect our come-back? It might even ruin everything!” Jun rubbed his forehead, already feeling the headache the said situation would surely bring. “Anyway, he’s here to return your keys, so pack up and I’ll drive you back. The sooner we terminate this extreme demonstration of stupidity, the better…”
Nino handed over the keys obediently. Sho and Aiba were both sure that he got his own scolding on the way here. Otherwise, he wouldn’t give up on his fun without a fight. Nino then retreated to Aiba’s side, next to the living room door, watching the whole scene silently, passively.
With Jun helping Sho to pack up, and with the obvious goal to move Sho out of Aiba’s place as quick as possible, they were on their way within half an hour.
The apartment was strangely silent when it was just Aiba and Nino left there.
“I’m sorry. We were together and he saw your message on my phone and… You know the rest…” Nino said as an explanation for the events that just occurred. It was unusual of him to offer an explanation on his own, which spoke a lot about how he felt about the situation.
Aiba just nodded silently. With everything that had happened since he arrived home, he completely forgot about the text he sent to Nino on his way home.
‘Let’s just end this. Give the keys back to Sho.’
“What happened?” Nino asked. “The last time we talked, it sounded like things were actually going good for the two of you…”
Aiba didn’t reply.
“Do you want me to… I don’t know…, talk to him?” Nino tried again, not used to Aiba being this silent.
“No. Go home, Nino-chan. You’ve done more than enough already…” he said uncharacteristically coldly before he left Nino to see himself out as he clearly overstayed his welcome.
Aiba never liked to fight with any of the members so a few days later he sent Nino a text to apologize, citing his exhaustion as an excuse for his behavior. Only after hitting the ‘send’ button did he realize that he practically used the same lame excuse that Sho gave him after that night. He couldn’t keep in the bitter laughter at the irony of the situation.
As much as he wanted to patch things up as soon as possible, he couldn’t bring himself to reach out to Sho. In his head, he kept repeating the scene that happened before Jun barged into his apartment. If he didn’t know better, he’d swear that Sho looked like he was gonna kiss him… But Sho would never do that. Not with Aiba. He made that crystal clear after that night…
Then, what was going on?! What was that all about? Ambushing him right at the entrance, nagging him with all those questions. Just what was going on in Sho’s head?! Sho wasn’t drunk that night, Aiba was quite sure of that, but he sure acted like he was.
All the thinking about these questions earned Aiba nothing but a long chain of sleepless nights where he laid in bed, stared at the ceiling, weighting the pros and cons of confronting Sho about his weird behavior. But in the end, when he almost convinced himself to talk to Sho, he always got scared of actually hearing the answer to those questions, and like all those years until now, he ended up doing nothing…
It was another night of fitful sleeping, endless hours of tossing and turning, when Aiba heard the thumping noise. At first he was sure he’d just imagined it. Or that it was the neighbors. But after a while he realized that someone was banging on his door.
“What the…” he mumbled as he shuffled to the door. Peeking through the peep hole, the last thing he expected to see was Sho slouching on the doorframe, hand raised to resume banging on the door.
Aiba hurriedly opened the door before Sho could make even more noise, waking the entire neighborhood and causing trouble with his neighbors.
“Sho-chan! What are you doing here?!” Aiba asked once he closed the door. The dark circles under Sho’s eyes screamed lack of sleep and they instantly made Aiba worry.
Sho stumbled a little as Aiba dragged him in, but once he found his footing, he looked at the younger man with such intensity that made Aiba’s breath hitch in his throat.
“Sho-chan?”
“I had to see you”
“What?”
“We have unfinished business…”
“What?” Aiba asked again, not being able to follow what Sho was talking about. “No, we don’t… Are you drunk, Sho-chan?” Aiba asked, frowning suspiciously.
“Wha…? No! I mean… I was out drinking with Ryuu-chan and Bukki but I’m not drunk! I know what I’m talking about!” Sho insisted.
“Well, at least that makes one of us, ’cause I sure can’t follow you at all. Why are you here, Sho-chan?”
“I had to see you,” Sho repeated insistently. “’Cause the other day I couldn't say what I had to tell you. I love you, Masaki, and not seeing you at all these past weeks was driving me crazy!”
Aiba gasped.
“What are you saying, Sho-chan!” Aiba protested, shaking his head furiously. He didn’t. There was no way Sho said what he heard. He was imagining this. Or dreaming. Yeah, that must be the case, otherwise…
“I do! I love you!” Sho repeated, and before Aiba could realize what was happening, Sho had his face cradled in his palm and his lips were on his. Soft, yet insistent. Proving his point. Making Aiba dizzy and breathless…
“But you…” Aiba whispered with difficulty once their lips parted. “You hardly spoke to me for years now unless it was work related…” Aiba said, a hint of vulnerability in his voice. Scared to believe that this was actually happening. Scared that he’d wake up any moment now, only to realize that this was only a dream that his mind conjured just to torment him.
Sho chuckled and pressed a kiss to Aiba’s forehead.
“I was scared,” Sho admitted with a small, embarrassed smile on his lips. “I was so scared that you’d reject me and I wasn’t sure if I could stay in Arashi if that happened. So… I thought that if not pursuing you but being in Arashi with you was the only way to have you, it would be still better than not having you in my life at all.”
Aiba’s heart skipped several beats at Sho’s confession. Could it be… that all this time…? Aiba reached out his hand slowly and fisted Sho’s shirt right over his rapidly beating heart. The feeling soothing his own turbulent emotions.
“Are you not scared anymore?”
“I am. I’m scared that I’ll lose you for good if I don’t take this risk now… So… here I am…”
“I was scared too, Sho-chan… For years… I thought… you can have anyone so… why would you choose me?”
Sho couldn’t help himself and sealed Aiba’s lips with his once more.
“No more of that, okay, Masaki? It’s time for us to be brave, okay? Together…”
Aiba felt tears stinging behind his eyes.
“Say it again?”
“Together?” Sho asked back, a bit unsure, but smiling at how adorable Aiba was.
“No, my name. You always call me ‘Aiba-kun’ or ‘Aiba-san’ so… Say my name again?”
Sho smiled a bit wider, his eyes full of love.
“Masaki…” he whispered, pressing a short little kiss on Aiba’s lips. “Masaki, Masaki, Masaki…” he repeated again and again, pressing kisses on Aiba’s cheeks and lips every time, until he started to laugh despite the tears trickling from his eyes.
“I love you too, Sho-chan…”
A/N: so a little fun fact for this story: it was inspired by the SP of Doubutsuen in January because Sho was looking at Aiba with such soft eyes that I swear I wanted to cry 😆 go and watch it again if you don't believe me but if that's not love, I don't know what is 🤣😍💚❤ joke aside, I hope you enjoy this. let me know what you think! 💚❤
After the ‘not-date’ night, their dynamics shifted slightly and sometimes it made really hard for Aiba to remind himself of reality and keep his hopes in check. Because from then on there were more shared dinners, at least a few times every week, and when their schedule allowed, more shared movies. Sho took Aiba’s words about him paying for groceries to heart, but insisted on going together, saying that since Aiba was the one actually cooking, he knew what they needed better, which made his presence imperative - Sho’s words, not Aiba’s! The whole thing was so domestic, almost intimate that it made Aiba’s heart clench painfully, but at the same time he couldn’t help himself wanting to indulge every minute of this illusion, knowing it was only a matter of time until Sho’s persistent calls and texts would wear down Nino’s patience and he’d give in and allow Sho to return his own home…
Aiba pouted at the clock on the wall one last time before he decided it was pointless to wait any longer. Though Sho had said he’d be a bit late, he’d promised he’d be back on time for another dinner-and-movie session. ‘Still not a date!’ But it was getting late; long past the time they agreed on. It happened several times before that Sho was late but by now, it became obvious that their plans for today were cancelled. Especially since Aiba would have to leave at 5 AM the next morning for a location shoot.
His appetite gone, Aiba packed up the dinner he made, putting everything in the fridge, and decided it was time for him to go to sleep already.
He understood that Sho had probably been held up at work or something had come up last minute. In their line of work, it happened a lot. But in light of the recent changes between them, Aiba would’ve expected Sho to at least let him know if he had to cancel their plans. He took a deep breath, then let it out slowly, hoping it would keep him from crying. He knew he should stop expecting anything from Sho. He didn’t owe Aiba anything. He knew it. They might be friends, colleagues, but only that; this living arrangement that gave Aiba all these weird ideas and hope was forced on them by Nino. It wasn’t Sho’s own choice. Aiba knew it all. He really did!
Maybe… maybe it was time for him to call Nino and make him end this façade, Aiba thought. The only thing he achieved with these past months was the strengthening of Aiba’s belief that pursuing anything with Sho was impossible, and all that waited for him at the end of this road was heartbreak…
He was on his way to his bedroom when the front door was finally opened by Sho.
“Oh, you’re still awake! I know I’m a bit late despite what we agreed on but we can still watch that movie, right?” He asked, smiling as if everything was alright. As if he didn’t make Aiba wait almost three hours! As if he didn’t just make it pointless for Aiba to go out of his way to prepare Sho’s favorite for dinner! As if…
Aiba counted back from ten in his head. He didn’t want to snap at Sho. He felt too tired to fight with him.
“I can’t. I have a location shoot for Doubutsuen tomorrow so I have to get up early. But you go ahead. Good night, Sho-chan,” he said avoiding Sho’s eyes, before he retreated to his room.
He didn’t see the smile disappear from Sho’s face, nor the disappointed look in his eyes that followed him until his bedroom door was closed…
Unsurprisingly, Aiba was exhausted by the time he arrived home after the Doubutsuen shooting the next day. His body was sore all over. The dog he worked with was especially scared of the shampooing and tried everything to escape from the moment Aiba put him in the sink. It took almost two hours just to wash him and by the time they were finished, Aiba’s clothes were drenched and his arms were completely covered in scratches. Aiba wished for nothing else but a proper bath and his bed.
“Tadaima…” he mumbled when he entered his apartment.
“Are you angry with me?”
Aiba jumped in surprise, stumbling back into the door behind him.
“Sho-chan…” he breathed out, shocked. “What are you doing here?”
Sho stood at the entrance as if he was waiting for Aiba. He was frowning, yet looked confused at the same time. Like he was anxious to hear Aiba’s answer. Like it bothered him that Aiba might reply with a ‘yes’. Aiba didn’t get it. Sho was never bothered with what Aiba might think or feel, wasn’t he?
“Are you angry with me?” Sho repeated insistently.
“What are you talking about?” Aiba asked back, too tired to play guessing.
“For yesterday. Are you angry with me?”
Aiba swallowed back the lump that started to form in his throat. Did Sho notice? Did he act weird last night? Aiba wasn’t sure. But he sure wasn’t prepared to have this conversation with Sho right now.
“Are you angry with me ’cause I didn’t tell you I’d be late? I’m sorry. Yesterday’s dinner… you worked a lot on it and I made your efforts go to waste. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to… to blow you off… Things got messed up and we had to re-do the shoot yesterday. With everything going on, I forgot… I didn’t mean to…” Sho explained in a rushed manner, almost desperately.
“It’s fine, Sho-chan,” Aiba interrupted him. He didn’t want to hear any more. Sho never meant it, it was just the way he was. Aiba knew it but he was also tired of hearing this when nothing ever changed. “You had work, I understand. I’m not angry,” he said the words Sho wanted to hear, hoping to end this conversation as soon as possible.
As Aiba stepped past him, Sho grabbed his arm, pulling him back. Tired as he was, Aiba stumbled right into Sho’s arms.
“Even if you’re not angry… You’re hurt. I’ve hurt you…” It wasn’t a question what Sho whispered, his eyes clouded with regret.
‘Too close!’ Aiba’s mind screamed at him but he couldn’t find the strength to step away.
“I’m not…” he tried to deny it but the words got stuck in his throat when Sho raised his hand to cup his face.
“I’m so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you… You have to believe me… I…”
The shrill, insistent ringing of the doorbell broke the strange spell that fell over them.
Aiba pushed Sho away rather forcefully and hurried to open the door.
Jun was the last person he expected to find there, especially since he looked quite annoyed. Almost angry.
“Matsujun, what are you…?” Aiba started but then he spotted Nino trying to hide behind Jun and the situation became a bit clearer in an instant.
“I can’t believe it!” Jun said instead of a greeting as he pushed his way in, kicking his shoes off. Nino was following him, obviously unhappy for having to be there. “Just how stupid the two of you are for letting this brat orchestrate this disaster waiting to happen?!”
Sho seemed to snap out of his shock faster than Aiba.
“It’s not like he gave us a choice or anything! He stole my keys!” Sho argued back. Despite the initial shock after seeing Jun barging in, he seemed more annoyed than anything, and he was not someone who was willing to take such a dressing-down silently. Especially when it wasn’t deserved one bit.
“So? He’s smaller than a shrimp, don’t tell me you can’t take your keys back from him?!” Jun huffed.
“Oh, so instead of sharing Aiba’s place for a while, you’d rather have me strangling Nino in a public bar for my keys? Sure, that would’ve been a spectacular sight…” Sho crossed his arms over his chest, looking at Jun as if he lost his mind.
“Of course not…” Jun admitted, reeling back a bit. “But obviously neither of you thought about what kind of media shit-storm it would be if the tabloids get a wind of this, now did you? The two of you living together… Did you think about how it could affect our come-back? It might even ruin everything!” Jun rubbed his forehead, already feeling the headache the said situation would surely bring. “Anyway, he’s here to return your keys, so pack up and I’ll drive you back. The sooner we terminate this extreme demonstration of stupidity, the better…”
Nino handed over the keys obediently. Sho and Aiba were both sure that he got his own scolding on the way here. Otherwise, he wouldn’t give up on his fun without a fight. Nino then retreated to Aiba’s side, next to the living room door, watching the whole scene silently, passively.
With Jun helping Sho to pack up, and with the obvious goal to move Sho out of Aiba’s place as quick as possible, they were on their way within half an hour.
The apartment was strangely silent when it was just Aiba and Nino left there.
“I’m sorry. We were together and he saw your message on my phone and… You know the rest…” Nino said as an explanation for the events that just occurred. It was unusual of him to offer an explanation on his own, which spoke a lot about how he felt about the situation.
Aiba just nodded silently. With everything that had happened since he arrived home, he completely forgot about the text he sent to Nino on his way home.
‘Let’s just end this. Give the keys back to Sho.’
“What happened?” Nino asked. “The last time we talked, it sounded like things were actually going good for the two of you…”
Aiba didn’t reply.
“Do you want me to… I don’t know…, talk to him?” Nino tried again, not used to Aiba being this silent.
“No. Go home, Nino-chan. You’ve done more than enough already…” he said uncharacteristically coldly before he left Nino to see himself out as he clearly overstayed his welcome.
Aiba never liked to fight with any of the members so a few days later he sent Nino a text to apologize, citing his exhaustion as an excuse for his behavior. Only after hitting the ‘send’ button did he realize that he practically used the same lame excuse that Sho gave him after that night. He couldn’t keep in the bitter laughter at the irony of the situation.
As much as he wanted to patch things up as soon as possible, he couldn’t bring himself to reach out to Sho. In his head, he kept repeating the scene that happened before Jun barged into his apartment. If he didn’t know better, he’d swear that Sho looked like he was gonna kiss him… But Sho would never do that. Not with Aiba. He made that crystal clear after that night…
Then, what was going on?! What was that all about? Ambushing him right at the entrance, nagging him with all those questions. Just what was going on in Sho’s head?! Sho wasn’t drunk that night, Aiba was quite sure of that, but he sure acted like he was.
All the thinking about these questions earned Aiba nothing but a long chain of sleepless nights where he laid in bed, stared at the ceiling, weighting the pros and cons of confronting Sho about his weird behavior. But in the end, when he almost convinced himself to talk to Sho, he always got scared of actually hearing the answer to those questions, and like all those years until now, he ended up doing nothing…
It was another night of fitful sleeping, endless hours of tossing and turning, when Aiba heard the thumping noise. At first he was sure he’d just imagined it. Or that it was the neighbors. But after a while he realized that someone was banging on his door.
“What the…” he mumbled as he shuffled to the door. Peeking through the peep hole, the last thing he expected to see was Sho slouching on the doorframe, hand raised to resume banging on the door.
Aiba hurriedly opened the door before Sho could make even more noise, waking the entire neighborhood and causing trouble with his neighbors.
“Sho-chan! What are you doing here?!” Aiba asked once he closed the door. The dark circles under Sho’s eyes screamed lack of sleep and they instantly made Aiba worry.
Sho stumbled a little as Aiba dragged him in, but once he found his footing, he looked at the younger man with such intensity that made Aiba’s breath hitch in his throat.
“Sho-chan?”
“I had to see you”
“What?”
“We have unfinished business…”
“What?” Aiba asked again, not being able to follow what Sho was talking about. “No, we don’t… Are you drunk, Sho-chan?” Aiba asked, frowning suspiciously.
“Wha…? No! I mean… I was out drinking with Ryuu-chan and Bukki but I’m not drunk! I know what I’m talking about!” Sho insisted.
“Well, at least that makes one of us, ’cause I sure can’t follow you at all. Why are you here, Sho-chan?”
“I had to see you,” Sho repeated insistently. “’Cause the other day I couldn't say what I had to tell you. I love you, Masaki, and not seeing you at all these past weeks was driving me crazy!”
Aiba gasped.
“What are you saying, Sho-chan!” Aiba protested, shaking his head furiously. He didn’t. There was no way Sho said what he heard. He was imagining this. Or dreaming. Yeah, that must be the case, otherwise…
“I do! I love you!” Sho repeated, and before Aiba could realize what was happening, Sho had his face cradled in his palm and his lips were on his. Soft, yet insistent. Proving his point. Making Aiba dizzy and breathless…
“But you…” Aiba whispered with difficulty once their lips parted. “You hardly spoke to me for years now unless it was work related…” Aiba said, a hint of vulnerability in his voice. Scared to believe that this was actually happening. Scared that he’d wake up any moment now, only to realize that this was only a dream that his mind conjured just to torment him.
Sho chuckled and pressed a kiss to Aiba’s forehead.
“I was scared,” Sho admitted with a small, embarrassed smile on his lips. “I was so scared that you’d reject me and I wasn’t sure if I could stay in Arashi if that happened. So… I thought that if not pursuing you but being in Arashi with you was the only way to have you, it would be still better than not having you in my life at all.”
Aiba’s heart skipped several beats at Sho’s confession. Could it be… that all this time…? Aiba reached out his hand slowly and fisted Sho’s shirt right over his rapidly beating heart. The feeling soothing his own turbulent emotions.
“Are you not scared anymore?”
“I am. I’m scared that I’ll lose you for good if I don’t take this risk now… So… here I am…”
“I was scared too, Sho-chan… For years… I thought… you can have anyone so… why would you choose me?”
Sho couldn’t help himself and sealed Aiba’s lips with his once more.
“No more of that, okay, Masaki? It’s time for us to be brave, okay? Together…”
Aiba felt tears stinging behind his eyes.
“Say it again?”
“Together?” Sho asked back, a bit unsure, but smiling at how adorable Aiba was.
“No, my name. You always call me ‘Aiba-kun’ or ‘Aiba-san’ so… Say my name again?”
Sho smiled a bit wider, his eyes full of love.
“Masaki…” he whispered, pressing a short little kiss on Aiba’s lips. “Masaki, Masaki, Masaki…” he repeated again and again, pressing kisses on Aiba’s cheeks and lips every time, until he started to laugh despite the tears trickling from his eyes.
“I love you too, Sho-chan…”
A/N: so a little fun fact for this story: it was inspired by the SP of Doubutsuen in January because Sho was looking at Aiba with such soft eyes that I swear I wanted to cry 😆 go and watch it again if you don't believe me but if that's not love, I don't know what is 🤣😍💚❤ joke aside, I hope you enjoy this. let me know what you think! 💚❤