045- Name
Boxes. The room looked completely unfamiliar now with all of the personal belongings stashed away and the warmth of the faded yellow walls was covered up by the boring brown of cardboard boxes. Alexia hadn't known where to start putting things away, now she didn't know where to start moving things out.
Tall and willowy, Alexia snatched her shoulder length red hair around the back of her head and up out of the way. She was sweating profusely in the warmth of the dorm room, her denim jeans cut off at the knees and had discarded her short sleeve button up shirt and was wearing only her white tank top. Sighing as she sat on the bed, she turned to the mirror, catching a glimpse of herself.
She bit her lower lip at the thought of what she was about to do. Her brother and father had come to watch her graduation as well as assist with her things, but she hadn't told them she wasn't coming with them. They would be taking everything but her trunk with them, which had taken the time to learn how to do a lightening and shrinking charm so the transporting would be easier. She had clothing, muggle and wizard money, as well as planned list of places she planned to see.
Dad had sent her several pamphlets for Hogwarts University expecting her to finish her education, Lex had different plans. She didn't know what exactly she wanted to do. The world was caging her in and it was making her restless.
She heard her brother and dad coming up the stairs to the dorm room and gripped her notebook of plans. It was now or never, she was telling them she wouldn't be coming home, at least not right away.
"Lexia, everything packed up?" her father asked.
She turned to look at her father and brother. There was no denying they were related. Lex and Gavin were a perfect combination of their parents. They had the same eyes, only different colors, Lex brown, Gavin hazel. Next to their father, the similarities popped out even more. Gavin's hair was lighter, mostly due to the being in the sun constantly, while Lex's was a deeper red. They had their father's nose, but some of his features were distorted by their mother's genes.
Gavin began stacking the boxes to disapparate them back to the house, but Lex stopped him.
"I can I talk to you both?" she blurted out. Her pulse was racing. What was she thinking? Quitting school, traveling the world, she couldn't do this. She didn't have the determination.
Gavin sat on the empty chest at the foot of Lex's bed, while her father sank into the matress across from Lex. Her head was buzzing and her hands tighened around her journal with her plans in it. Her dad watched her patiently, his eyes kind and encouraging.
"Lex?"
"I'm not coming back," Lex blurted out, staring at the engraved features of the notebook.
"What?" Gavin perked up immediately, looking concerned.
"Well, not yet anyway," Lex continued before either of them could interrupt. "I'm not going to Hogs U either. Dad, Gav, I've been saving up my money over the summer and during the school year and I'm going to travel for a few years before I continue school."
The room was silent. She could hear birds singing outside, the wind rushing through the trees, even people talking in the courtyard, but in the room there was silence.
"When did you..." her father started but Lex cut him off.
"Mid March. Breena and I were talking and I decided that I don't actually know what I want to do yet. I know my grades are decent enough that if I want to continue I can in pretty much anything, but I dunno." Lex looked up as she spoke and over at her father. He didn't look angry, he looked confused and concerned, "I feel like somewhere along the line of everything that has happened I've lost a bit of myself. I don't even know who I am right now."
That wasn't entirely true. Lex knew who she had been inside the walls of Hogwarts. She had been a chaser for the quidditch team, the last person to fall asleep everynight and the one who was always late for breakfast. She was the girl who had been in detention over 20 times due to being out of bounds and breaking curfew. She had been one fourth of a group of friends who shared everything. But now Breena, Hari and Alaina were gone, off on their own adventures, adventures where Lex couldn't follow.
"This is such a big step right now and I want to make sure I'm doing the right thing," she said slowly. "I hope you understand."
She suddenly felt light and free. The secret was out there, she couldn't take it back now. All she could do was pray they wouldn't be angry. She glanced over at Gavin, who looked startled, but not upset. Just a little shocked.
"I'll go to Hogwarts in due time, I just want to make sure I'm doing the right thing by me," she finished, determined and feeling a lot better. No one had interrupted her, no one had yelled. She would be fine. Her father seemed a bit shaken by the entire thing, but neither looked upset.
"Where will you go?" her dad asked first, still watching the floor.
"France, other than that I'm not sure. I have a list I want to go off of."
She handed him the journal with places, sites, cities and people she would visit. France, Italy, Romania, Russia, China, the USA, New Zealand, so many foreign places. She didn't know how long it would take, but she hoped it took a while. She wanted to spread her wings and be free.
"You'll be gone for a while," he replied, flipping through the book.
"I won't be completely out of touch," she said quickly, at least she hoped. She hadn't done this before, so she didn't know if that was true.
Gavin was gripping the post of the bed frame and her Dad handed her back the small journal. They weren't saying anything, it was making her nervous.
"I can't stop you from doing this, Lex, but I wish you wouldn't." her father said, looking at her, his eyes concerned. "The world is not easy and simple. It's dangerous."
"I know, I'll be fine. I'll be careful, promise. I'll write every week to let you know I'm okay," she assured them.
"You don't know who you are?" Gavin asked.
Lex bit her lower lip and frowned.
"I don't know who I am outside these walls, Gav. I know who I am here, but out in the world I have no idea. I want to figure it out. I don't want to be lost anymore."
Gavin frowned, got to his feet and hugged her tightly. She reached out and patted his back, feeling this was probably the best reaction she could have asked for. He pulled back, looking down and her, his eyes wet with tears.
"You'll come back a better person," he assured her, "You'll feel whole."
"Thanks Gav," she whispered and kissed his cheek.
Their father reached out and hugged them too, setting Lex's book on the bed sheets. A feeling of fullness filled her, something hadn't felt in a long time. This was a small part of her, the only daughter of a single father and a beloved sister. She had so many parts and just because she was leaving one behind, didn't mean it was lost. She went by so many names, some she already knew, others she would discover over the next few years. She knew that someone somewhere would also be able to help her find the name she had and would always be. Lex.