Scattered Thoughts About Change
The recurring theme in my life lately has been
a swing between extremes, and seemingly never-
-ending changes. It's given me a lot to think
about... and yes, to express here.
The Freshmaker
Anyone remember those commercials from the early-mid 90's?
Mentos? 90's nostalgia has been hitting me quite a bit
lately. Before the whole trend or ironic humor/views/etc
came around and Hollywood ran out of ideas, I remember
growing up in an era where most movies had either happy
endings or a positive message. So did many tv shows, like
Full House or whatever other shows you can think of. They
all gave us a sense of looking at the positive side of
life, or that when you feel alone, you don't realize
how important you may be to someone, or simply your
positive affect on their lives.
The reason I mention Mentos is, though it was a ploy to
sell a product, it still gave us a sense that something
creative could be done to save ourselves when we think
all is going wrong. And though I didn't need a product
to help me accomplish this, I did manage to pick myself
back up. How? It's called experience in the real world.
While the real world has cruel employers, severe consequences
for not having money, or stable people to depend on, and while
it can shatter your heart and make you shatter the hearts of
others, it's up to you to do for yourself. You can't just
continue to use your misfortunes as a crutch for too long.
Those are called homeless people.
They gave up or thought that by being a perpetual victim,
it would earn them something for nothing. Yes, it's sad
that they ended up that way... but it gets to a ridiculous
point where they stop taking responsibility for themselves
all together. And my experiences and all the strength and
wisdom I've gained from them snapped me back after not
even a day of brooding, reminded me I had a spine, a brain,
a sense of self worth that no one can take from me, and then
I focused on pushing myself to the limit, using all the
resources at my disposal to change the situation for the
better.
Since then, having applied to over 90 jobs to over 40
different companies within 3 days, I've had more than
10 call backs for interviews, gone to 3 already, and
have great potential to be hired by some very well
established companies with even better pay and
benefits than my former jobs.
It wasn't prayer, or looking for pity, or giving up
while blaming everyone else that got me there... it
was ME who did for myself. If you think you have no
one to ask... if you have the damn internet, ask
Google. It couldn't hurt. Do the research yourself.
Go to a library. If you want things to change, you
have to do it yourself and really push your potential.
The only time you can't do anything at all is when you
take your last breath of life.
But enough about me... now onto other
changes I'd very much like to address...
Men, WTF Happened?
This was inspired by a picture I found recently :
See, as I was growing up in the late 80's - early 90's,
I was raised being taught that men were these guys :
While Dr Jones is awesome, I'd say I'm more like Bond.
As I grew up, I was taught to be a gentleman... not a creepy/stalker,
wimpy modern-day "nice guy", nor an over-bearing type who acts macho
to compensate for something... I was taught natural confidence gives
you all the masculinity you need, but kept in moderation with a touch
of class and common sense. A man who respects a woman - yet neither
puts her on an unreachable pedestal, nor buries her beneath him. If
something doesn't work out, it doesn't make you less of a person or
less of a man - you learn from it... which is where true strength
comes from.
Danielle made a very good point in response to that above statement
of mine. She said that in a way, the modern change is good in that
it has helped men become more open to expressing their feelings,
rather than being afraid of them, and to not be so insecure when
they are faced with effeminate things.
I agreed... just without the skinny jeans, shaggy hair in the eyes,
and other wimpy mannerisms. All the masculinity a man needs is the
same as a woman needs in her feminine security - confidence. Both
genders will always have their strengths and weaknesses. They should
not be exploited as negative traits, but rather recognized and respected
of each other if they are to be complete individuals together. And
though some men and some women may lie to themselves in youth as to
what they find attractive, it always changes as they grow up.
I am just glad I had a chance to explore life, unafraid, and to
figure out what makes me happy, and that I could reach within
myself to pick myself up because I remembered that I can, and
that I always have before. Not to mention what it is to have
a partner with whom I can not only have an adult discussion
after natural panic, but who understands the world in just as
equal a capacity as I can; because she, too, knows what it is
to actually have to work to gain real independence as an adult,
as well as the stress it causes, and how to overcome it in
order to keep on living and not blind oneself to what one
is capable of when backed up against the wall and not
having anywhere else to go or anyone else to rely on.
It may come at a high price, but I can honestly say I
prefer to have the struggle to overcome... to prove to
myself that I can accomplish what I put my mind to.
No one can take that from me.
a swing between extremes, and seemingly never-
-ending changes. It's given me a lot to think
about... and yes, to express here.
The Freshmaker
Anyone remember those commercials from the early-mid 90's?
Mentos? 90's nostalgia has been hitting me quite a bit
lately. Before the whole trend or ironic humor/views/etc
came around and Hollywood ran out of ideas, I remember
growing up in an era where most movies had either happy
endings or a positive message. So did many tv shows, like
Full House or whatever other shows you can think of. They
all gave us a sense of looking at the positive side of
life, or that when you feel alone, you don't realize
how important you may be to someone, or simply your
positive affect on their lives.
The reason I mention Mentos is, though it was a ploy to
sell a product, it still gave us a sense that something
creative could be done to save ourselves when we think
all is going wrong. And though I didn't need a product
to help me accomplish this, I did manage to pick myself
back up. How? It's called experience in the real world.
While the real world has cruel employers, severe consequences
for not having money, or stable people to depend on, and while
it can shatter your heart and make you shatter the hearts of
others, it's up to you to do for yourself. You can't just
continue to use your misfortunes as a crutch for too long.
Those are called homeless people.
They gave up or thought that by being a perpetual victim,
it would earn them something for nothing. Yes, it's sad
that they ended up that way... but it gets to a ridiculous
point where they stop taking responsibility for themselves
all together. And my experiences and all the strength and
wisdom I've gained from them snapped me back after not
even a day of brooding, reminded me I had a spine, a brain,
a sense of self worth that no one can take from me, and then
I focused on pushing myself to the limit, using all the
resources at my disposal to change the situation for the
better.
Since then, having applied to over 90 jobs to over 40
different companies within 3 days, I've had more than
10 call backs for interviews, gone to 3 already, and
have great potential to be hired by some very well
established companies with even better pay and
benefits than my former jobs.
It wasn't prayer, or looking for pity, or giving up
while blaming everyone else that got me there... it
was ME who did for myself. If you think you have no
one to ask... if you have the damn internet, ask
Google. It couldn't hurt. Do the research yourself.
Go to a library. If you want things to change, you
have to do it yourself and really push your potential.
The only time you can't do anything at all is when you
take your last breath of life.
But enough about me... now onto other
changes I'd very much like to address...
Men, WTF Happened?
This was inspired by a picture I found recently :
See, as I was growing up in the late 80's - early 90's,
I was raised being taught that men were these guys :
While Dr Jones is awesome, I'd say I'm more like Bond.
As I grew up, I was taught to be a gentleman... not a creepy/stalker,
wimpy modern-day "nice guy", nor an over-bearing type who acts macho
to compensate for something... I was taught natural confidence gives
you all the masculinity you need, but kept in moderation with a touch
of class and common sense. A man who respects a woman - yet neither
puts her on an unreachable pedestal, nor buries her beneath him. If
something doesn't work out, it doesn't make you less of a person or
less of a man - you learn from it... which is where true strength
comes from.
Danielle made a very good point in response to that above statement
of mine. She said that in a way, the modern change is good in that
it has helped men become more open to expressing their feelings,
rather than being afraid of them, and to not be so insecure when
they are faced with effeminate things.
I agreed... just without the skinny jeans, shaggy hair in the eyes,
and other wimpy mannerisms. All the masculinity a man needs is the
same as a woman needs in her feminine security - confidence. Both
genders will always have their strengths and weaknesses. They should
not be exploited as negative traits, but rather recognized and respected
of each other if they are to be complete individuals together. And
though some men and some women may lie to themselves in youth as to
what they find attractive, it always changes as they grow up.
I am just glad I had a chance to explore life, unafraid, and to
figure out what makes me happy, and that I could reach within
myself to pick myself up because I remembered that I can, and
that I always have before. Not to mention what it is to have
a partner with whom I can not only have an adult discussion
after natural panic, but who understands the world in just as
equal a capacity as I can; because she, too, knows what it is
to actually have to work to gain real independence as an adult,
as well as the stress it causes, and how to overcome it in
order to keep on living and not blind oneself to what one
is capable of when backed up against the wall and not
having anywhere else to go or anyone else to rely on.
It may come at a high price, but I can honestly say I
prefer to have the struggle to overcome... to prove to
myself that I can accomplish what I put my mind to.
No one can take that from me.