some kind of fic
Life in Mono
Brian/Justin | post-513 | drama, romance | He lives in a world void of color.
Fic #40/50 for my fanfic50 table | Prompt: 041. Shake
Notes: Title stolen from Life in Mono by Mono.
Life in Mono
by sakesushimaki
One goodbye. Some Promises.
A few calls. No visits.
One accident.
+
He lives in a world void of color. He’s gotten used to it, like you would after marathoning old black and white movies. He knows there’s something missing because he knows what color feels like, tastes like.
Sometimes he wishes he could go back, undo the years. Other times he’s glad for them, for they justify his cynicism.
+
The night Justin leaves, the world is colder, darker than anything Brian has ever felt. Something inside him gives an almost audible jarring sound and Brian knows that whatever broke is irreparable.
+
When he can’t stand it at the loft anymore, he goes to the house. It’s a self-destructive thing to do but at least he has blinds to close there.
The world has become a dark place and Brian dims all lights accordingly.
+
Bad luck - he owns it, he thinks. Bad fucking timing - he is the poster boy, he’s sure.
He delayed his first visit - he didn’t want to distract Justin from his goal. He saved up his modest amount of I miss you’s - he didn’t want to make it any harder. He kept things about the house to himself - he wanted to leave the surprise for the right time.
It’s not only time when it runs out.
+
Some days, Brian is convinced there’s a hole in his chest. He tries to cover it up, tie and shirt in place, but it’s there all the same.
He keeps a couple of spare shirts in his office. Sometimes, he’s sure he’s bleeding through the one he’s wearing.
+++
Justin dreams of light, of spinning, of silk swept around his neck.
It feels comfortable where he is, serene, but something isn’t quite right. Something tells him he’s been lingering.
He thinks it’s time.
+++
The call comes during lunch at the diner.
Theodore has been glancing worriedly, Brian has been ignoring him and mentally counting the spare shirts in his office cabinet.
There can only be two reasons for Cynthia to call him during his sacred lunch break: yes or no. It takes only a second, only one intake of breath over the line, to gauge which one it is.
And through the blur, Brian fights and runs.
Because he’s got everything to lose.
Because he wants a world of color.
Brian/Justin | post-513 | drama, romance | He lives in a world void of color.
Fic #40/50 for my fanfic50 table | Prompt: 041. Shake
Notes: Title stolen from Life in Mono by Mono.
Life in Mono
by sakesushimaki
One goodbye. Some Promises.
A few calls. No visits.
One accident.
+
He lives in a world void of color. He’s gotten used to it, like you would after marathoning old black and white movies. He knows there’s something missing because he knows what color feels like, tastes like.
Sometimes he wishes he could go back, undo the years. Other times he’s glad for them, for they justify his cynicism.
+
The night Justin leaves, the world is colder, darker than anything Brian has ever felt. Something inside him gives an almost audible jarring sound and Brian knows that whatever broke is irreparable.
+
When he can’t stand it at the loft anymore, he goes to the house. It’s a self-destructive thing to do but at least he has blinds to close there.
The world has become a dark place and Brian dims all lights accordingly.
+
Bad luck - he owns it, he thinks. Bad fucking timing - he is the poster boy, he’s sure.
He delayed his first visit - he didn’t want to distract Justin from his goal. He saved up his modest amount of I miss you’s - he didn’t want to make it any harder. He kept things about the house to himself - he wanted to leave the surprise for the right time.
It’s not only time when it runs out.
+
Some days, Brian is convinced there’s a hole in his chest. He tries to cover it up, tie and shirt in place, but it’s there all the same.
He keeps a couple of spare shirts in his office. Sometimes, he’s sure he’s bleeding through the one he’s wearing.
+++
Justin dreams of light, of spinning, of silk swept around his neck.
It feels comfortable where he is, serene, but something isn’t quite right. Something tells him he’s been lingering.
He thinks it’s time.
+++
The call comes during lunch at the diner.
Theodore has been glancing worriedly, Brian has been ignoring him and mentally counting the spare shirts in his office cabinet.
There can only be two reasons for Cynthia to call him during his sacred lunch break: yes or no. It takes only a second, only one intake of breath over the line, to gauge which one it is.
And through the blur, Brian fights and runs.
Because he’s got everything to lose.
Because he wants a world of color.