I've come to a certain epiphany - after all of these suicide entries. Right now I am at a sort of peace within myself. I am, of course, waiting for my medications to kick in (the dilantin, ativan and trileptal). All of these medications will give me an unawareness of self. I will be emotional, tired, unbalanced, unable to walk, disoriented, dizzy ( Read more... )

You know, I used to be called an insomniac. Smoker's island was an old haunt, the dorm lobby a place to watch the movers and the shakers (I mean the pot heads and the drunkards)come and go, the elevator a place to contemplate philosophy and lastly, whoever's room to escape to the morning sunlight. I used to be like a vampire. So did our group. The ( Read more... )

And it’s all up to her ( Read more... )

I thought I would come to my computer this morning to write about Seth, Ray and Jeremy. Three of the most important men in my past and even now, significant in the present. I will say little about the trio now, but what I will say for now means a lot to me ( Read more... )

I am literally pulling my own trigger, over and over again. Am I masochistic? Can't I be, for once, normal ( Read more... )

9/26/05 -
Met a new guy named Rick. He's 26 and works at a hospital. He wants to go out. He calls me "zany" and "original". Dating. Ha.
- Kels

9/26/05 ( Read more... )

Three things that scare me

1. Myself
2. Being emotionally distant
3. The traffic sign beeper thingy majigs for the blind people. You can seriously hear them from my dorm's parking lot. And that means you are hearing them nearly 2 miles away from where they are.

Three people who make me laugh1. Dane Cook ( Read more... )

On Thursday evening, I headed over to Erica's apartment to order pizza and watch Shakespeare in Love (recommended to any and all). So we did. But we also ended up discussing her ex-boyfriend Adam who is marrying Rebekah, a lesbian, tomorrow. Already, it had been planned that this weekend was Erica's weekend, that all of our care and attention would ( Read more... )

"I snatched her up from the flowers. Vessel of my blood. Petals falling. Whispered poetry was tumbling from her lips, "Or like a creature native and indued unto that element ( Read more... )

"Patrick, you know why they don't want to legalize life threatening narcotics! If we end up committing suicide on them, the government won't get our taxes ( Read more... )