I hate waking up in the middle of the night and not being able to fall back asleep its by far the most frustrating thing on this planet. I'm so irritated right now i feel like i'm gonna blow. I need more sleep. Where are those sleeping pills?

Things are gonna change.
I'm sick of myself.
I am the dumbest person i know.
I need to get a grip. And work on things that i need to fix.
Starting right now. Today. things are gonna be differnt.

I'm so done with screwing myself over. Its time for a change. Its starting today.

I'm still not okay and wasn't okay.
Your leaving me. Its killing me. I need you here, not there.
I will always be here. But this will NOT be easy.

I have probably ten million billion things on my mind. Its really rather annoying. I would rather not think today.

i hate this i hate this i hate this.

I'm living in a personal hell. Everything i've always wanted feels far off and impossible. I'm laying on the railroad tracks in my mind. This train of self destruction and self pity is soon to come. It has once again crossed my path and taken hold of my thoughts. This rope is tight against these rails, the train is coming. Do i have the streght or ( Read more... )

I'm tired.
I'm bored.
I'm sore.
My stomach hurts.
I wanna cry.
Blah.

I have a job. I'm getting like 50ish bucks every time i work in tips, which is REALLY nice to have. I'm at that point again where all my anger and stress that i try really hard to compress is about to explode in a bad way. I feel it in my chest, i very well may flip out soon, and i honestly don't know if i will be alright this time.. I got drunk ( Read more... )

So I lost my job. AWESOME. it happened a week ago but I'm still pissed about it especially right now. I really need the fucking money. I maybe having ALOT of expenses coming up in the next 9 months or so. ugh! fuck! I really am upset I should just sleep I should I think I will being it's 5:30 in the morning. unfortantly I am wide awake. babble ( Read more... )

I really thought I was gonna be okay.. I don't think I am going to be..

I'm not ready for this.