i've held my fist tight for to long, i've been stuborn for too long. I finally give in, you have my life, my entire life.

life's depressing, it sucks being alone

I'm sitting in my room, it's 3am, it's quite, peacefull, i've turned the tv off, i'm sitting at my couch about to read my Bible, which i just started reading again. I learned that Jonny Carson died sun, i saw it on tv sun. morning. I've never met the guy, never watched any of his shows, he went off the air in 92, i was 7 years old i was too ( Read more... )

Well, i've been doing really well, Schools stressful but that's always going to happen. I have a test tonight at 7pm, which i think is a load of crap. I can't believe they're making me take a test on a mon. night, when i have the class during the day, but instead of the test lasting 1hour and 50min. like the class it's only going to last 1 hour ( Read more... )

I'm tired of who i was, i don't know what i want to be. I don't intend to sound mean, i don't want to push my friends away, but i got too much criticism for who i was....all i was, was just that other guy, i'm tired of being that other guy, i'm tired of playing it safe, i'm tired of being the good guy. "Nice guys finish Last" and it's very true. I ( Read more... )

Hey, well i'm back at Tech, i'm driving a new car. Well not exactlly new, it's a 91 Lincoln Town Car....yea yea i know ( Read more... )

Well today was my first day working at Target i went to work at 9am for an oritation and i spent 2 hrs of watching a saftey video and touring the store, the rest of the time was them shoving me on cashier for 4 hrs. (my training on the cashier consisted of watching the lady do 2 transactions then her telling me "hey you look like you're smart ( Read more... )

For the record i say alot things some of them i don't mean, some of them i don't know why i say them, sometimes i say i want to get drunk and i really do, but i know i don't need to and i'm not going to do it. The one time i did do that was because i was depressed about girls. When i get stessed and drepressed about school and life i don't get ( Read more... )

I was told today that i care about other people more than i care about my self, and i'm not sure if i should be mad or greatfull that they said that, i know they said that cause they care and it's not easy to say that kinda stuff. I'm not entirely sure what they ment by it though ( Read more... )

I don't know what to do, i've never known what to do, i know where i'm headed though and i don't want to go there. I know that for me to get better i will have to want to change but i won't want to change until i've reached my low. And i really don't want to go there. I'm expecting my car to break down or something wrong happen to it on my drive ( Read more... )