A Matter of Time, part 1/10
Title: A Matter of Time - 1/10
Characters/Pairings: Kirk/McCoy (AOS), and featuring Amanda Grayson, Sarek, Spock, Jocelyn and Joanna McCoy
warnings angst, romance, underage teen sex, references to miscarriage, implied physical abuse to a minor, some mild violence, rimming
Rating: nc-17 throughout
Current Word Count: this part approx 5,070 words (of 65,700)
Beta: the extraordinarily, awarrington
summary An AU set in the Trek universe which explores a different beginning for Jim and Bones. Leonard McCoy suffers from chrono impairment, a genetic disease which causes him to time travel against his will. When teenage McCoy travels back in time and meets Jim Kirk aged six, in a meadow in Iowa, it is the beginning of a close friendship which will mark both their lives forever. The story tracks Kirk and McCoy’s relationship, McCoy’s search for a cure and Jim’s path to finding himself.
disclaimer None of these characters belong to me and I mean no offense when I play with them - I do this for love not money.
intriguing snippet “Even when there are other people, there’s only us. You’re the one told me that when I was just a kid.”
Author’s notes While this story is heavily inspired by The Time Traveler’s Wife, by Audrey Niffinegger, it exists very much in it’s own universe and be assured, if you’re familiar with that novel, that while I’ve stolen one or two ideas, it takes it’s own path and the ending is totally different! All quotes at the beginning of sections are from Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass by Lewis Carroll. Note that where McCoy’s age is in brackets, this is a ‘time-travelling’ age and will not ‘fit’ with the date at the beginning of a section. There are additional notes at the end of part 10, but no peeking as they contain spoilers!
Most of all, I want to thank my beta, awarrington who has mentored me throughout, provided endless, patient encouragement and guidance, polished up my Vulcan Speak, helped me make shit up, put up with my punctuation fail and, most of all, worked out the science-babble without which this fic would have sucked. One or two passages in chapters 8 and 9 are entirely hers but she’s so modest she denies it. So, I’ll take all the credit, though I know where ideas came from when I was stuck and needed them. Thank you, finally, for believing in this fic, bb, and for giving up so much of your time to reading and re-reading it. While any errors and plot holes at this stage are entirely mine, patient reader, please be assured, I’ve really given this my best effort.
Now, onto the fic itself - enjoy and please, please tell me if you liked it! Feedback, like Jim and Bones, is love
link to ART by anoncomment7
link to fanmix by leighblack
For links to all chapters, go to the Masterpost
Part 1
Alice: “If it had grown up, it would have made a dreadfully ugly child; but it makes rather a handsome pig, I think.”
2239: Iowa: Jim is 6, Leonard is (14)
Jim
Jim lies on his back staring up at a big, blue sky. While the clouds are few and far between, he can tell things are changing - it’s just that time. He can read the signs. Jim’s latest thing is the weather, but not just any weather; Jim loves tornados like mad - since he’s seen a show on the nets about storm chasers. He likes that idea a lot, and when he’s big, he’s going to get all the equipment, make some of it himself maybe, and drive real fast, eyeballing twisters. He touches his throbbing cheek, wondering if he’d feel quite this battered and bruised if he’d been lifted up and dumped by one.
Shame he can’t drive. In fact, shame he’s only six and he’ll have to wait at least five or so years until his feet can even reach the pedals of his dad’s car. It’s been sitting under a dust cloth for as long as he can remember. Sometimes he’ll sneak in, hide out inside - it had been easy-peasy to work out the combo on the alarm.
“See, you asshole, not as dumb as you think!” Jim shouts up at the firmament, fingers pinching gently at his tender bottom lip like cleaner fish.
Jim likes to wriggle under the tarp, get inside the back seat with his flash-light, spread all his stuff out and lie back in his secret den, his face pressed against ancient leather, wondering what it might have been like when his dad drove the Chevrolet. Jim imagines his mom in the passenger seat looking adoringly at his dad, corn-colored hair flying. She’s never looked at Jim like that, so he has no idea if he’s got the image right or anything but he’s watched enough movies with happy families and loving moms to have some idea. And, he’s seen plenty of holos from before he was born, knows how long her hair was then. She cut it all off sometime after ‘it’ happened.
Jim turns carefully onto his belly. He’s flattened a small area of long grass, just big enough for him and his rucksack, and he’s spread his towel out. No one will find him here, either, he thinks, hiccupping as the last remnant of a sob echoes through his slight frame. He rubs at another sore area around his eyebrow as he watches a grasshopper climb up a stalk inches from his face. The birds are busy around him, oblivious to his plight. And they won’t mind his cussing , so Jim tries a word out.
“Fuck,” he whispers, they, everyone can just ‘fuck’. His body trembles at the power of the word.
Jim feels inside his pocket for the tiny, metal dog figure he found wedged behind the back seat of the Chevrolet. It goes everywhere with him and he painted it chocolate brown once. He rests it on the towel centimeters from his chin.
“Bones, we’re safe here,” he says.
Damn - he wants a real dog so bad that he almost sets off crying again. He imagines burying his face in Bones’ neck if he was real, how the dog might lick his tears away and be his friend. Jim just knows he’ll never get one now, not after what’s just happened. Frank won’t allow it; Frank, the evil giant, the big bad wolf, the Klingon Emperor in his life, but just until Mom comes back, maybe in the holiday, and then Frank’ll pretend to be Captain Nice and Mom will believe him. It’s not fair. Jim wishes he had, needs someone, something to hang with. He’s kind of sick of being all alone. His body aches with it.
“Hey!” says a voice behind him. Jim gasps, scrabbles for the phaser Mom gave him on her last trip Earthside. He’s never separated from it, ‘cept when he’s at school. He’s taken to hiding it, always in different locations, so he can pick it up on his way home, in case of a Klingon attack.
“I…I’ve got a gun,” Jim says. His voice might be high pitched but Jim knows a weapon makes him anyone’s equal, and whoever it is won’t know it’s been disabled - you can’t get toy phasers look this real.
“Hail, Terran, put your weapon down, I mean you no harm.”
It sounds like something from Jim’s favorite TV show. “Do you like Star Quest?” Jim asks. He can’t see anyone, but he figures the voice is coming from maybe five meters away. “And I can’t put it down, ‘cause I’m not s’posed to talk to strangers, see?”
“Well, I’m glad you’ve been raised right,” the voice chuckles. “And sure, I like Star Quest.”
“Come out so I can see you. I won’t shoot.” Jim’s proud of the way he manages to control the tremor in his voice - and his hope, that whoever it is will be fooled by his weapon, has paid off ‘cause the voice says:
“I’m pretty scared here, but I don’t want to come out, something, er…, see -- something happened to my clothes.” The stranger clears his throat and Jim can feel his heart beating hard, ‘cause the voice sounds closer now. Jim still can’t see anyone - maybe the guy’s really short. Maybe he’s crawling on his hands and knees.
Jim glances around for an escape route, stands up and braces his legs wide, holding the gun up with two hands like he’s seen in the movies -they’re only shaking a little. Jim remembers what the big kids at school sound like, with their threatening, oh-so-bored voices, the ones who push him around. He pretends to be one of them and says:
“Don’t take another step. I’m going to shoot. I’m not supposed to talk to people I don’t know and ‘specially ones not wearing any clothes.” Jim moves into a crouching position and glances at his rucksack. He has his comm in there; he can always call the cops. Also, he can run real fast. He’ll leave his towel, collect it later -- when the coast’s clear.
“I do have a really good explanation for why I’m stuck here in a meadow in nothin’ but my birthday suit. Do you wanna hear it?” the disembodied voice asks.
Jim doesn’t answer and instead starts a backwards shuffle, the phaser tucked in the back of his shorts, the grass spiking his knees and the palms of his hands. He’s going to head for the clump of trees the other side of the meadow, only a minute away at a good sprint. But, he stops when he hears:
“Hey, kid, you interested in time travel?”
The part of Jim that loves danger, the kind of danger makes him happy, the kind he chooses to dive into, not the kind that has him locking his bedroom door and cowering under the covers, stands to attention. He palms the phaser again, but keeps it low, by his leg just in case and sits back on his haunches.
“Time travel? Cool.” Jim squints, trying to see through the swaying grass, thinks maybe he can make out something.
He hears another chuckle. “Hey, toss over that towel and I’ll come out. Then you’ll see for yourself that I’m not the big bad wolf.”
Jim has to admit, that even with the whole naked thing, and the fact that he’s yet to see the stranger’s face, he doesn’t really feel under threat and Sam’s said he’s got good in-stinks, explained to Jim that means he knows what to do and what’s right, when to trust people. This voice is a kind voice, nothing like Frank’s, when he’s faking friendly…
“I’ll throw it over to you but you’ve gotta promise not to come any closer. Or I’ll tell my step-dad. He’s real mean,” Jim says. He can see the grass moving a little, just ahead and to the right a bit.
“Okay, well I don’t want to get on the wrong side of him. What’s his name?”
Jim’s not sure he wants to say, thinks about it and sighs.
“Frank. He’s an asshole.”
The stranger snorts with laughter but doesn’t chew Jim out for cussing, so Jim balls up his special bath towel, the one with starships all over, and throws it over the long grass. A cloud of insects erupts overhead when it lands.
“Thanks - got it!”
Jim holds his breath, waits, heart drumming in his ears, until the stranger eventually stands up, towering over the swaying stems, over Jim. Jim lets out a puff of air when he sees it’s just a kid, maybe Sam’s age, maybe older. He has dark eyebrows, thick, messy hair, tan skin and a mouth like a girl’s. ‘course, he still looks naked - the towel’s probably lower down, out of sight, but something tells Jim he’ll be okay. So he doesn’t step back when the boy takes a couple of tentative steps towards him, one hand out-stretched like Jim’s seen people do with dogs, to make friends.
“You look real silly,” Jim says, taking in the sight of the tall, skinny figure with kind eyes who looks like maybe he’s been in a fight too, the way one of his cheeks is red. The boy’s tied the beach towel round his hips and long fingers hold it tight. Jim’s eyes flicker to a long welt down his ribs but doesn’t mention it. Jim knows the rules about stuff like that. “Why aren’t you wearing any clothes?” he asks cocking his head. Well, it’s a good question. His teacher always says Jim asks good questions, right before she changes the subject.
The boy ducks his chin, opens his mouth but doesn’t say anything so Jim tries again.
“What’s your name?”
For a moment there’s just the buzz of insects, crickets and the rustle of the grass stems.
“Leonard, Leonard McCoy -- I know it’s lame, “a big, toothy smile and the boy’s braces glint in the sun -.”What about you?”
“I’m not supposed to say ‘cause I don’t know you and, and - you’re weird.” But Jim’s phaser’s on the towel now and Jim’s settled back, sat down cross-legged fiddling with a scab on his knee.
“Not so weird, well, apart from the time travelling part.”
Leonard takes another step towards him, so Jim leans away a little, never taking his eyes off Leonard.
“Yeah you time travel!” Jim scowls. “I don’t believe you. No one can do that yet - unless you’ve figured out how to manipulate wormholes and black holes and, and if you have, how come I haven’t heard about it - it’s only in movies.” Leonard Lame Name doesn’t know a thing about time-travel.
“Manipulate! Ha - you’re one smart little kid! Hey, I hate to prove you wrong, but it is possible.”
Jim’s suddenly all breathless, his questions flying out of him like bees from a hive.
“How? Are you an alien? Or have you got a machine?” Jim chews a nail to calm down. “What’s it like in the future? I wanna see.” He feels his bottom lip again. “Can I come with you?” And, in all this time, while they’ve been talking, Leonard’s ended up standing real close to Jim, so Jim can smell his sweat. He curls up his nose.
“I’m from the -- your --future. See I travel back in time.” Leonard looks at Jim sideways, his eyes bright while he waits for a reaction. Grins when Jim says:
“No way!”
“Yeah way.” Leonard nods, puffs out a breath through his nose, gazes down at Jim.
“Can you go forwards too?” Jim wants to know.
Leonard’s thick eyebrows meet. “I’m not sure…I haven’t yet but my Gram, she was a jumper too, said she’d been to the future…I dunno. Thing is, I can’t stop it happening… usually.” Leonard’s voice fades away like he doesn’t want to tell Jim stuff, like Jim won’t understand or something and Jim feels tears welling up again, bites his lip.
Leonard sits down on the grass, stretches his legs out, crosses his ankles, and tucks the towel around his legs. He’s rubbing his head like he feels sick and now he’s this close, Jim thinks he can smell puke.
“Tell me stuff if it’s true! “ Jim says. “I wanna know if I play baseball for the Hawkeye’s - see, that’s what I want to do when I’m big. Or maybe be a pilot for Starfleet - I haven’t decided yet. Maybe I could play baseball in my spare time.”
“That would be cool,” Leonard nods, and Jim likes that he doesn’t seem to think this is a stupid idea.
Then a thought occurs to Jim. “Hey, do you know my mom?”
Leonard looks away. “I can’t tell you things about people, kid, and it’s best if you don’t tell me her name and stuff - it can get intense knowin’ what’s going to happen, not being able to tell people.”
“But that’s not fair - you said, and stop calling me kid, you’re like my brother, he’s always saying that.” Jim grinds his teeth - he’s not a baby.
“But I can tell you about some cool inventions, well not too much,” Leonard frowns.
“I’m old enough to know stuff, I am. It’s cause it isn’t true, you’re just making it up.” Jim burrows in his back-pack. “I’ll let you see something I got I’ve never let anyone see - you wanna know what my mom looks like?”
“Sure…it’s not likely I’ll ever meet her.” Leonard sighs then stares intently at Jim when the holo sparks to life. “Your mamma’s in Starfleet - that’s great!”
“Yeah-“Jim says. They don’t talk while he tucks the holo and his phaser away in his back pack. Then he remembers his precious dog figure, scoops it up, curls his fist around it. Jim looks at Leonard’s boney knees then asks, without looking at his face, “Where’s your mom?” He shoves Bones into his pocket when he thinks Leonard won’t notice.
Leonard brings a hand up to his forehead, rubs the space between his eyebrows and he almost whispers, “She…um…she died.”
Jim’s eyes widen. He thinks about how sad his Mom is, how he’s not allowed to talk about ‘it’ and he twitches his lips, tries to think of something he is allowed to say.
“Why haven’t you got any clothes?”
Leonard shrugs and then sighs. “See, when you time-travel, you can’t bring anything with you.”
“Why not?” Jim thinks this is dumb. What’s the point of time-travel if you always end up naked? It’s stupid.
“When it happens,” Leonard goes on, “first I get all dizzy. It’s like I’m falling down a hole or somethin’, then I’m on the ground and I feel real sick. It makes me puke up, you know, like when you get motion sickness - I get that too.”
Jim thinks about Sam’s green face when they get off rides at the Thresherman Festival and feels a bit sorry for Leonard. “I like going real fast - it makes my tummy all warm, but I like it.”
“Well, lucky you, but I don’t think it’s like that, or maybe it is, I dunno but, point is, when I ‘land’, it’s just me, just my skin and muscle and bones - my clothes get left behind wherever I was at the time. Gram used to say only jumpers can travel through the fourth dimension and you can’t bring anything with you. Damned annoying I can tell ya.”
Jim giggles and wrinkles up his nose at that, the thought of an old lady naked.
“What’s the fourth dimension?”
Leonard waggles his eyebrows, leans towards Jim and makes a TV voice. “Time,” he says, his voice boomy, like the intro on Star Quest.
Wow.
“But, can’t you make special clothes, yanno, if you’re so clever?”
Leonard rolls his eyes. “I never said I was so clever, did I? If I was, I wouldn’t travel at all. I’d find a way to stop - God knows I’ve tried.” Leonard leans forward, whispers, “Hey -wanna know something weird? There’s another me now…somewhere.”
“I don’t’ get it.” Jim thinks, then - “I know - you’re a twin!”
Leonard laughs, looks at Jim sideways. “No, I’m not a twin.”
“There’s twins in my homeroom - stupid girls. I hate girls.”
Leonard lowers his eyes, smiles to himself. “Yeah, I guess they can be damned annoying - but some of them are kinda cool - you’ll see. I got a girlfriend - she’s pretty with blonde hair and eyes like cornflowers.”
“That’s gross,” Jim says sulkily, wishes Leonard would stick to talking about interesting stuff, like the fourth dimension, not sissy girls.
Leonard runs his hand through his hair. “Okay, sorry, I guess that is gross.” He smiles. “So, like I was sayin’, no - not a twin, there’s just another me. See I’m from - hey, what year is this?”
“2239,” Jim says. He knows kids his age don’t even know all their months of the year - babies.
“Okay, I was born in ’27 - so can you work out how old I am?”
“Yeah, that’s easy - you’re twelve!” Jim says eagerly.
“You’re one smart kid that’s for sure! Okay, see if you can understand this, ‘cause I sure can’t-”
Jim notices how Leonard says things funny - how he makes the word ‘can’t’ long, like he’s a cat talking or something, then sometimes his voice doesn’t sound like a kid for a second, and it’s all deep and trumpety. “You talk weird too.”
Leonard rolls his eyes again. Jim notices he does that a lot. “No - you’re the one talks weird…damned Yankees…and anyways, my voice is breaking.” Jim frowns, doesn’t know what he means. He doesn’t like it when he doesn’t understand stuff and he’s about to ask how a voice can ‘break’ when it’s not made of anything and Leonard puts up a hand to stop him. “Now listen good, see if you can get this.” Leonard puts one hand in front of him and to the side to help explain. “It’s like this…“There I am in the future,” Jim looks at Leonard’s hand. “Then - ‘pooft’!” Leonard mimes an explosion or something, moves the hand that’s supposed to be him, along in a line to his left, “And I’m gone. I’ve jumped. I’m here, not there anymore - you following this?”
Jim stares at Leonard’s hands. He’s brought the other one up too now, both hands in fists, side by side, they’re supposed to be two Leonards. Jim nods.
“Yeah, it’s easy, then what?”
“Well, here - in 2239 - there’s another me, the ‘me’ from before, from now.The Leonard McCoy who’s jumped back from 2241, me,” Leonard taps his chest, grins at Jim, “I’m fourteen, but the one who’s in Atlanta now, he’s still 12.” Leonard waves a hand vaguely, as if he’s pointing to Atlanta. He brings both his hands back down to his knees, and tucks the towel under his thighs again.
Jim thought Leonard looked big for twelve. He’s a lot taller than Sam.
“How do you know? Does he know you’re here?”
Leonard shakes his head - rubs an itch on his leg. “And where the hell is this? Iowa again? Damned flat, damned cold…dunno why, but I keep coming back to Iowa - can’t say as I like it here. Anyways - you know where Atlanta is?”
“Yeah.” Jim draws out the word, irritated. Why does everyone keep asking him these dumb questions when he’s nearly seven and they’re gonna put him a year ahead in school?
“Well, it’s a damn sight warmer than here - but then again, if I had me some clothes, eh kid?”
Jim glances at Leonard’s long, bare toes, wonders when he’ll get his towel back. “But what happens when…what if you were in Atlanta and you see’d the other you?”
“We do see each other sometimes. Older me, way, way older, when I’m a man with stubble on my face, he comes and sees me. He…umm…” Leonard shakes his head, “…he’s like my dad or something, helps me out. He’s taught me stuff, bad stuff like how to break security codes on doors, how to fight, how to steal clothes so I don’t get into trouble.”
“That’s so cool!”
“Yeah, right! I gotta know this stuff, so’s if I’m stuck in the past, I’m naked, I can get clothes or hide out - till I jump home, to my own time.”
“What if someone catches you? They’ll put you in jail!”
“He says, older me says, he’s been in jail lotsa times, but it’s no biggy.” And Jim sees Leonard do that shrug, like Sam and his friends do, like they think they’re all grown up or something.
“‘Cause you always disappear!” Jim giggles, rolls around on the grass, wishes he could do that. “Hey, Bone.. Leonard, can you teach me to fight?”
Leonard looks serious. “I dunno, kid, maybe, depends…who would you fight?”
“Jus’ people, lots of people.” Jim clenches his hands into fists, thinks Leonard’s going to say he’s bad, just like Frank always says he is, like those kids at school who tease him, say he’s a nerd, too damned smart for his own good, but they’re just dumb, that’s what Sam says. But Leonard doesn’t call him bad. “You gonna come back?”
Leonard nods. “Yeah, I’d like to but-”
“Can you come back an’ stop Mom marrying Frank?” Jim’s up on his feet now - Leonard can fix things - he can be a super-hero! Then his face falls when Leonard says quietly:
“Gram said I couldn’t change stuff. You can’t undo the past, she said. She’d tried, but stuff always happens the way it’s meant to. Anyways, I can’t choose where I jump to, even if I wanna come back.”
“But why can’t you teach me to fight? Please…? Show me now, come on-” Jim pulls at Leonard’s arm, wants to make him stand up but Bones doesn’t shift and Jim loses his balance and lands heavily on the grass…
Suddenly Jim yelps, leaps back up like he’s been yanked by the ear, and he’s jumping around, trying to escape the fire-brand in his hand.
“Ow, ow!” Jim shakes his hand like a snake trying to escape a sack. “I got stinged! Ouch! It hurts, it hurts!” He’s wedged his wrist under his armpit now, can’t stop the tears filling his eyes again; then he cups and examines his hand. It’s starting to go red and he can see the stinger. Breath short and angry, he crouches and scans the ground for the bee but he can’t see it anywhere.
“You’ll be fine, kid, don’t worry.” Leonard’s voice is soothing, kind, but he doesn’t come any closer. “We gotta take the stinger out or it’ll hurt more-“
Jim doesn’t know why, but he trusts Leonard, and he holds up a shaking hand so Leonard can pull out the sting. Leonard’s hands are much bigger than his and his fingers are long and cool. He knows Leonard’s noticed he’s crying and he can barely hear his own voice when he says, “I’m not a cry baby. It just hurts.”
“Nothing wrong with crying, Jim. I cry all the time and makes sense to cry when you’re hurtin’. Well, if I could bring stuff with me, I could’ve given you something from my daddy’s medkit.” Leonard ruffles Jim’s hair but Jim shrugs him off, wipes his nose with the back of his hand.
“I’m not a baby!” Jim pouts, indignant now. “Anyway, I’ll be okay. I’ve been hurt worse.”
“Yeah, I can see that,” Leonard says, his voice gruff. “What happened to your face, kid? Did ya fall over?” His eyes are dark, like his frowny eyebrows.
Jim shakes his head but he isn’t going to tell him, he’s not telling anyone.
“Mom says bicarb’s the best for bee stings.”
“You remember stuff, right?”
“Yeah, I do,” Jim says, suddenly feeling lighter. “I never forget anything. I get the best scores in math, history, science…” Leonard’s smiling while he listens - doesn’t think Jim’s showing off. “And I know lots of poems -- you wanna hear?”
“Yeah, I’d like that, but first wanna do something for the bee sting? It gets worse the longer you leave it.”
“But you said you haven’t got any stuff.”
“Hey - I remember things too, Jim. My gram says the best thing for a bee sting is four kinds of grass. You think you can find four kinds of grass for me? Can’t hurt to try, can it?”
Jim jumps up and sprints off to search the grasses surrounding them. “You need the stems or the leaves…?” He calls over his shoulder.
“Stems’ll do.”
Jim’s back and he dumps an armful of grass on the ground in front of Leonard. Jim holds out a hand and Leonard crouches down, breaks open the stems, twists them up and smears them across the swollen knuckle leaving a pale, green stain. His hands are gentle - makes Jim feel safe. Jim takes a deep breath.
“I know lots. I know about the weather. I know the names of the grass, see,” Jim says, rattling off the names. “This one’s buffalo grass and this one’s-“
Leonard’s kind eyes fix on Jim’s face, hold his gaze and Jim gulps, wishes he could keep Bones (because that’s totally Jim’s new secret name for Leonard now) keep him here to talk to and play with.
“I wanna come back, Jim. I just don’t know if I can. Sure looks like you could do with a friend.”
Jim stiffens, but doesn’t pull his hand away. “I got lotsa friends but…they’re lame. They don’t know anything and they get grounded ‘cause their moms say I’m bad, do stupid stuff. They’re not cool like you.”
Jim stops talking when Leonard stands up with a jolt, stumbles and doubles over, still hanging on to the towel. “Shit, I gotta…” he looks down at Jim, touches his shoulder lightly. Jim thinks Leonard might be sick or something, he’s rolling his head forward.
“I’m…damnit… I’m gonna go in a moment, so listen, listen good, okay?”
“Yeah, okay…” Jim’s trembling, doesn’t want his new, bestest friend to leave.
“I’ll try and come back, when I’m older, if I can figure out how to, and I’ll teach you how to fight …I prom...”
And Jim watches open mouthed as the towel drops to the ground and Bones is gone, like the Cheshire cat and, within seconds the space he’s filled is just late summer air again.
“Whoa…” Jim says and brings his sore hand up to his mouth to suck.
He waits a few minutes and picks up Bones’ towel, smells it, folds it reverently and pushes it into his rucksack. He looks around, hoping to see Bones again, missing his new friend already. He wishes he’d told Bones his name. He totally meant to, but he forgot and now Bones will never be able to find him.
+++
2257: San Francisco: Jim is 24, Leonard is 30
Leonard
Leonard sprints across the quad, relieved it’s still dark. He knows all the routes that avoid the security cameras, though with all the cut backs, he suspects most of them are dummies anyway. He’ll have to get Jim to hack into the system and find out for him - it’ll make this sort of shit, his fucking routine, so much easier. Least he’s been able to hide some clothing in various locations around the academy, but it only works out half the time when Leonard comes back from a jump. He doesn’t always return to the exact location he’s time-travelled from, but this time he’s been relatively lucky. He digs around in a grit container, locks it up again and slips into thrift shop sneakers and sweats and sprints back to their room.
This isn’t from running, he knows, rubbing his wet face with the palm of his hand. He takes a few calming breaths before punching in the code for their door. Leonard could run a marathon before he’d even begin to feel tired - this is fear. Fear that he might never have gotten this chance.
Leonard’s waited years for this moment, for this opportunity to go back to Jim, ever since Jim told him about what he’d been through.
Leonard’s jumped back, been with thirteen year old Jim for days, hidden out in the barn till Frank’s gone to work. He’s had time to teach Jim how to skin a rabbit, how to survive off berries, how to fix himself up with plants, how to survive his ordeal that Leonard’s known all along he couldn’t ever prevent from happening; Jim was always gonna keep fighting with Frank, always going to total the Chevvy, always going to end up being sent to Tarsus to stay with his aunt. But Leonard did what he could - he’s made damned sure the kid’s got all he needs to survive, knows how to hide out. And Leonard’s made sure Jim doesn’t starve.
Now it’s done and everything’s as it should be. Jim will make it, maybe he was always going to, but Leonard’s done what he can and made sure that it isn’t just dumb luck makes Jim survive Tarsus IV.
The chrono says 05:00, February 1st, 2257 - he’s only been away from the present for a few minutes though it’s ‘been’ days with Jim.
He undresses, throws his clothes to the foot of the bed. He steps over the pile of clothes, worn t-shirt and boxers he was sleeping in before he’d woken from a nightmare about Tarsus. Another dream, his mind tormenting him with imagined images of a young Jim running and hiding… then, seconds later, Leonard staggered to his feet and jumped out.
Now he’s home.
Jim presses back into Leonard when he slips into bed. “You’re all cold,” Jim mumbles, his voice rough from sleep. Leonard inhales his scent to ground himself, to be here. Jim reaches behind to take Leonard’s hand and wrap it round his chest. “Where you been?”
Leonard kisses him on the back of the head, pulls the covers up around them and says, “Nowhere special, I’m here now, Jim - with you. Go back to sleep. Tell you ‘bout it in the morning.”
ON TO PART 2
Characters/Pairings: Kirk/McCoy (AOS), and featuring Amanda Grayson, Sarek, Spock, Jocelyn and Joanna McCoy
warnings angst, romance, underage teen sex, references to miscarriage, implied physical abuse to a minor, some mild violence, rimming
Rating: nc-17 throughout
Current Word Count: this part approx 5,070 words (of 65,700)
Beta: the extraordinarily, awarrington
summary An AU set in the Trek universe which explores a different beginning for Jim and Bones. Leonard McCoy suffers from chrono impairment, a genetic disease which causes him to time travel against his will. When teenage McCoy travels back in time and meets Jim Kirk aged six, in a meadow in Iowa, it is the beginning of a close friendship which will mark both their lives forever. The story tracks Kirk and McCoy’s relationship, McCoy’s search for a cure and Jim’s path to finding himself.
disclaimer None of these characters belong to me and I mean no offense when I play with them - I do this for love not money.
intriguing snippet “Even when there are other people, there’s only us. You’re the one told me that when I was just a kid.”
Author’s notes While this story is heavily inspired by The Time Traveler’s Wife, by Audrey Niffinegger, it exists very much in it’s own universe and be assured, if you’re familiar with that novel, that while I’ve stolen one or two ideas, it takes it’s own path and the ending is totally different! All quotes at the beginning of sections are from Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass by Lewis Carroll. Note that where McCoy’s age is in brackets, this is a ‘time-travelling’ age and will not ‘fit’ with the date at the beginning of a section. There are additional notes at the end of part 10, but no peeking as they contain spoilers!
Most of all, I want to thank my beta, awarrington who has mentored me throughout, provided endless, patient encouragement and guidance, polished up my Vulcan Speak, helped me make shit up, put up with my punctuation fail and, most of all, worked out the science-babble without which this fic would have sucked. One or two passages in chapters 8 and 9 are entirely hers but she’s so modest she denies it. So, I’ll take all the credit, though I know where ideas came from when I was stuck and needed them. Thank you, finally, for believing in this fic, bb, and for giving up so much of your time to reading and re-reading it. While any errors and plot holes at this stage are entirely mine, patient reader, please be assured, I’ve really given this my best effort.
Now, onto the fic itself - enjoy and please, please tell me if you liked it! Feedback, like Jim and Bones, is love
link to ART by anoncomment7
link to fanmix by leighblack
For links to all chapters, go to the Masterpost
Part 1
Alice: “If it had grown up, it would have made a dreadfully ugly child; but it makes rather a handsome pig, I think.”
2239: Iowa: Jim is 6, Leonard is (14)
Jim
Jim lies on his back staring up at a big, blue sky. While the clouds are few and far between, he can tell things are changing - it’s just that time. He can read the signs. Jim’s latest thing is the weather, but not just any weather; Jim loves tornados like mad - since he’s seen a show on the nets about storm chasers. He likes that idea a lot, and when he’s big, he’s going to get all the equipment, make some of it himself maybe, and drive real fast, eyeballing twisters. He touches his throbbing cheek, wondering if he’d feel quite this battered and bruised if he’d been lifted up and dumped by one.
Shame he can’t drive. In fact, shame he’s only six and he’ll have to wait at least five or so years until his feet can even reach the pedals of his dad’s car. It’s been sitting under a dust cloth for as long as he can remember. Sometimes he’ll sneak in, hide out inside - it had been easy-peasy to work out the combo on the alarm.
“See, you asshole, not as dumb as you think!” Jim shouts up at the firmament, fingers pinching gently at his tender bottom lip like cleaner fish.
Jim likes to wriggle under the tarp, get inside the back seat with his flash-light, spread all his stuff out and lie back in his secret den, his face pressed against ancient leather, wondering what it might have been like when his dad drove the Chevrolet. Jim imagines his mom in the passenger seat looking adoringly at his dad, corn-colored hair flying. She’s never looked at Jim like that, so he has no idea if he’s got the image right or anything but he’s watched enough movies with happy families and loving moms to have some idea. And, he’s seen plenty of holos from before he was born, knows how long her hair was then. She cut it all off sometime after ‘it’ happened.
Jim turns carefully onto his belly. He’s flattened a small area of long grass, just big enough for him and his rucksack, and he’s spread his towel out. No one will find him here, either, he thinks, hiccupping as the last remnant of a sob echoes through his slight frame. He rubs at another sore area around his eyebrow as he watches a grasshopper climb up a stalk inches from his face. The birds are busy around him, oblivious to his plight. And they won’t mind his cussing , so Jim tries a word out.
“Fuck,” he whispers, they, everyone can just ‘fuck’. His body trembles at the power of the word.
Jim feels inside his pocket for the tiny, metal dog figure he found wedged behind the back seat of the Chevrolet. It goes everywhere with him and he painted it chocolate brown once. He rests it on the towel centimeters from his chin.
“Bones, we’re safe here,” he says.
Damn - he wants a real dog so bad that he almost sets off crying again. He imagines burying his face in Bones’ neck if he was real, how the dog might lick his tears away and be his friend. Jim just knows he’ll never get one now, not after what’s just happened. Frank won’t allow it; Frank, the evil giant, the big bad wolf, the Klingon Emperor in his life, but just until Mom comes back, maybe in the holiday, and then Frank’ll pretend to be Captain Nice and Mom will believe him. It’s not fair. Jim wishes he had, needs someone, something to hang with. He’s kind of sick of being all alone. His body aches with it.
“Hey!” says a voice behind him. Jim gasps, scrabbles for the phaser Mom gave him on her last trip Earthside. He’s never separated from it, ‘cept when he’s at school. He’s taken to hiding it, always in different locations, so he can pick it up on his way home, in case of a Klingon attack.
“I…I’ve got a gun,” Jim says. His voice might be high pitched but Jim knows a weapon makes him anyone’s equal, and whoever it is won’t know it’s been disabled - you can’t get toy phasers look this real.
“Hail, Terran, put your weapon down, I mean you no harm.”
It sounds like something from Jim’s favorite TV show. “Do you like Star Quest?” Jim asks. He can’t see anyone, but he figures the voice is coming from maybe five meters away. “And I can’t put it down, ‘cause I’m not s’posed to talk to strangers, see?”
“Well, I’m glad you’ve been raised right,” the voice chuckles. “And sure, I like Star Quest.”
“Come out so I can see you. I won’t shoot.” Jim’s proud of the way he manages to control the tremor in his voice - and his hope, that whoever it is will be fooled by his weapon, has paid off ‘cause the voice says:
“I’m pretty scared here, but I don’t want to come out, something, er…, see -- something happened to my clothes.” The stranger clears his throat and Jim can feel his heart beating hard, ‘cause the voice sounds closer now. Jim still can’t see anyone - maybe the guy’s really short. Maybe he’s crawling on his hands and knees.
Jim glances around for an escape route, stands up and braces his legs wide, holding the gun up with two hands like he’s seen in the movies -they’re only shaking a little. Jim remembers what the big kids at school sound like, with their threatening, oh-so-bored voices, the ones who push him around. He pretends to be one of them and says:
“Don’t take another step. I’m going to shoot. I’m not supposed to talk to people I don’t know and ‘specially ones not wearing any clothes.” Jim moves into a crouching position and glances at his rucksack. He has his comm in there; he can always call the cops. Also, he can run real fast. He’ll leave his towel, collect it later -- when the coast’s clear.
“I do have a really good explanation for why I’m stuck here in a meadow in nothin’ but my birthday suit. Do you wanna hear it?” the disembodied voice asks.
Jim doesn’t answer and instead starts a backwards shuffle, the phaser tucked in the back of his shorts, the grass spiking his knees and the palms of his hands. He’s going to head for the clump of trees the other side of the meadow, only a minute away at a good sprint. But, he stops when he hears:
“Hey, kid, you interested in time travel?”
The part of Jim that loves danger, the kind of danger makes him happy, the kind he chooses to dive into, not the kind that has him locking his bedroom door and cowering under the covers, stands to attention. He palms the phaser again, but keeps it low, by his leg just in case and sits back on his haunches.
“Time travel? Cool.” Jim squints, trying to see through the swaying grass, thinks maybe he can make out something.
He hears another chuckle. “Hey, toss over that towel and I’ll come out. Then you’ll see for yourself that I’m not the big bad wolf.”
Jim has to admit, that even with the whole naked thing, and the fact that he’s yet to see the stranger’s face, he doesn’t really feel under threat and Sam’s said he’s got good in-stinks, explained to Jim that means he knows what to do and what’s right, when to trust people. This voice is a kind voice, nothing like Frank’s, when he’s faking friendly…
“I’ll throw it over to you but you’ve gotta promise not to come any closer. Or I’ll tell my step-dad. He’s real mean,” Jim says. He can see the grass moving a little, just ahead and to the right a bit.
“Okay, well I don’t want to get on the wrong side of him. What’s his name?”
Jim’s not sure he wants to say, thinks about it and sighs.
“Frank. He’s an asshole.”
The stranger snorts with laughter but doesn’t chew Jim out for cussing, so Jim balls up his special bath towel, the one with starships all over, and throws it over the long grass. A cloud of insects erupts overhead when it lands.
“Thanks - got it!”
Jim holds his breath, waits, heart drumming in his ears, until the stranger eventually stands up, towering over the swaying stems, over Jim. Jim lets out a puff of air when he sees it’s just a kid, maybe Sam’s age, maybe older. He has dark eyebrows, thick, messy hair, tan skin and a mouth like a girl’s. ‘course, he still looks naked - the towel’s probably lower down, out of sight, but something tells Jim he’ll be okay. So he doesn’t step back when the boy takes a couple of tentative steps towards him, one hand out-stretched like Jim’s seen people do with dogs, to make friends.
“You look real silly,” Jim says, taking in the sight of the tall, skinny figure with kind eyes who looks like maybe he’s been in a fight too, the way one of his cheeks is red. The boy’s tied the beach towel round his hips and long fingers hold it tight. Jim’s eyes flicker to a long welt down his ribs but doesn’t mention it. Jim knows the rules about stuff like that. “Why aren’t you wearing any clothes?” he asks cocking his head. Well, it’s a good question. His teacher always says Jim asks good questions, right before she changes the subject.
The boy ducks his chin, opens his mouth but doesn’t say anything so Jim tries again.
“What’s your name?”
For a moment there’s just the buzz of insects, crickets and the rustle of the grass stems.
“Leonard, Leonard McCoy -- I know it’s lame, “a big, toothy smile and the boy’s braces glint in the sun -.”What about you?”
“I’m not supposed to say ‘cause I don’t know you and, and - you’re weird.” But Jim’s phaser’s on the towel now and Jim’s settled back, sat down cross-legged fiddling with a scab on his knee.
“Not so weird, well, apart from the time travelling part.”
Leonard takes another step towards him, so Jim leans away a little, never taking his eyes off Leonard.
“Yeah you time travel!” Jim scowls. “I don’t believe you. No one can do that yet - unless you’ve figured out how to manipulate wormholes and black holes and, and if you have, how come I haven’t heard about it - it’s only in movies.” Leonard Lame Name doesn’t know a thing about time-travel.
“Manipulate! Ha - you’re one smart little kid! Hey, I hate to prove you wrong, but it is possible.”
Jim’s suddenly all breathless, his questions flying out of him like bees from a hive.
“How? Are you an alien? Or have you got a machine?” Jim chews a nail to calm down. “What’s it like in the future? I wanna see.” He feels his bottom lip again. “Can I come with you?” And, in all this time, while they’ve been talking, Leonard’s ended up standing real close to Jim, so Jim can smell his sweat. He curls up his nose.
“I’m from the -- your --future. See I travel back in time.” Leonard looks at Jim sideways, his eyes bright while he waits for a reaction. Grins when Jim says:
“No way!”
“Yeah way.” Leonard nods, puffs out a breath through his nose, gazes down at Jim.
“Can you go forwards too?” Jim wants to know.
Leonard’s thick eyebrows meet. “I’m not sure…I haven’t yet but my Gram, she was a jumper too, said she’d been to the future…I dunno. Thing is, I can’t stop it happening… usually.” Leonard’s voice fades away like he doesn’t want to tell Jim stuff, like Jim won’t understand or something and Jim feels tears welling up again, bites his lip.
Leonard sits down on the grass, stretches his legs out, crosses his ankles, and tucks the towel around his legs. He’s rubbing his head like he feels sick and now he’s this close, Jim thinks he can smell puke.
“Tell me stuff if it’s true! “ Jim says. “I wanna know if I play baseball for the Hawkeye’s - see, that’s what I want to do when I’m big. Or maybe be a pilot for Starfleet - I haven’t decided yet. Maybe I could play baseball in my spare time.”
“That would be cool,” Leonard nods, and Jim likes that he doesn’t seem to think this is a stupid idea.
Then a thought occurs to Jim. “Hey, do you know my mom?”
Leonard looks away. “I can’t tell you things about people, kid, and it’s best if you don’t tell me her name and stuff - it can get intense knowin’ what’s going to happen, not being able to tell people.”
“But that’s not fair - you said, and stop calling me kid, you’re like my brother, he’s always saying that.” Jim grinds his teeth - he’s not a baby.
“But I can tell you about some cool inventions, well not too much,” Leonard frowns.
“I’m old enough to know stuff, I am. It’s cause it isn’t true, you’re just making it up.” Jim burrows in his back-pack. “I’ll let you see something I got I’ve never let anyone see - you wanna know what my mom looks like?”
“Sure…it’s not likely I’ll ever meet her.” Leonard sighs then stares intently at Jim when the holo sparks to life. “Your mamma’s in Starfleet - that’s great!”
“Yeah-“Jim says. They don’t talk while he tucks the holo and his phaser away in his back pack. Then he remembers his precious dog figure, scoops it up, curls his fist around it. Jim looks at Leonard’s boney knees then asks, without looking at his face, “Where’s your mom?” He shoves Bones into his pocket when he thinks Leonard won’t notice.
Leonard brings a hand up to his forehead, rubs the space between his eyebrows and he almost whispers, “She…um…she died.”
Jim’s eyes widen. He thinks about how sad his Mom is, how he’s not allowed to talk about ‘it’ and he twitches his lips, tries to think of something he is allowed to say.
“Why haven’t you got any clothes?”
Leonard shrugs and then sighs. “See, when you time-travel, you can’t bring anything with you.”
“Why not?” Jim thinks this is dumb. What’s the point of time-travel if you always end up naked? It’s stupid.
“When it happens,” Leonard goes on, “first I get all dizzy. It’s like I’m falling down a hole or somethin’, then I’m on the ground and I feel real sick. It makes me puke up, you know, like when you get motion sickness - I get that too.”
Jim thinks about Sam’s green face when they get off rides at the Thresherman Festival and feels a bit sorry for Leonard. “I like going real fast - it makes my tummy all warm, but I like it.”
“Well, lucky you, but I don’t think it’s like that, or maybe it is, I dunno but, point is, when I ‘land’, it’s just me, just my skin and muscle and bones - my clothes get left behind wherever I was at the time. Gram used to say only jumpers can travel through the fourth dimension and you can’t bring anything with you. Damned annoying I can tell ya.”
Jim giggles and wrinkles up his nose at that, the thought of an old lady naked.
“What’s the fourth dimension?”
Leonard waggles his eyebrows, leans towards Jim and makes a TV voice. “Time,” he says, his voice boomy, like the intro on Star Quest.
Wow.
“But, can’t you make special clothes, yanno, if you’re so clever?”
Leonard rolls his eyes. “I never said I was so clever, did I? If I was, I wouldn’t travel at all. I’d find a way to stop - God knows I’ve tried.” Leonard leans forward, whispers, “Hey -wanna know something weird? There’s another me now…somewhere.”
“I don’t’ get it.” Jim thinks, then - “I know - you’re a twin!”
Leonard laughs, looks at Jim sideways. “No, I’m not a twin.”
“There’s twins in my homeroom - stupid girls. I hate girls.”
Leonard lowers his eyes, smiles to himself. “Yeah, I guess they can be damned annoying - but some of them are kinda cool - you’ll see. I got a girlfriend - she’s pretty with blonde hair and eyes like cornflowers.”
“That’s gross,” Jim says sulkily, wishes Leonard would stick to talking about interesting stuff, like the fourth dimension, not sissy girls.
Leonard runs his hand through his hair. “Okay, sorry, I guess that is gross.” He smiles. “So, like I was sayin’, no - not a twin, there’s just another me. See I’m from - hey, what year is this?”
“2239,” Jim says. He knows kids his age don’t even know all their months of the year - babies.
“Okay, I was born in ’27 - so can you work out how old I am?”
“Yeah, that’s easy - you’re twelve!” Jim says eagerly.
“You’re one smart kid that’s for sure! Okay, see if you can understand this, ‘cause I sure can’t-”
Jim notices how Leonard says things funny - how he makes the word ‘can’t’ long, like he’s a cat talking or something, then sometimes his voice doesn’t sound like a kid for a second, and it’s all deep and trumpety. “You talk weird too.”
Leonard rolls his eyes again. Jim notices he does that a lot. “No - you’re the one talks weird…damned Yankees…and anyways, my voice is breaking.” Jim frowns, doesn’t know what he means. He doesn’t like it when he doesn’t understand stuff and he’s about to ask how a voice can ‘break’ when it’s not made of anything and Leonard puts up a hand to stop him. “Now listen good, see if you can get this.” Leonard puts one hand in front of him and to the side to help explain. “It’s like this…“There I am in the future,” Jim looks at Leonard’s hand. “Then - ‘pooft’!” Leonard mimes an explosion or something, moves the hand that’s supposed to be him, along in a line to his left, “And I’m gone. I’ve jumped. I’m here, not there anymore - you following this?”
Jim stares at Leonard’s hands. He’s brought the other one up too now, both hands in fists, side by side, they’re supposed to be two Leonards. Jim nods.
“Yeah, it’s easy, then what?”
“Well, here - in 2239 - there’s another me, the ‘me’ from before, from now.The Leonard McCoy who’s jumped back from 2241, me,” Leonard taps his chest, grins at Jim, “I’m fourteen, but the one who’s in Atlanta now, he’s still 12.” Leonard waves a hand vaguely, as if he’s pointing to Atlanta. He brings both his hands back down to his knees, and tucks the towel under his thighs again.
Jim thought Leonard looked big for twelve. He’s a lot taller than Sam.
“How do you know? Does he know you’re here?”
Leonard shakes his head - rubs an itch on his leg. “And where the hell is this? Iowa again? Damned flat, damned cold…dunno why, but I keep coming back to Iowa - can’t say as I like it here. Anyways - you know where Atlanta is?”
“Yeah.” Jim draws out the word, irritated. Why does everyone keep asking him these dumb questions when he’s nearly seven and they’re gonna put him a year ahead in school?
“Well, it’s a damn sight warmer than here - but then again, if I had me some clothes, eh kid?”
Jim glances at Leonard’s long, bare toes, wonders when he’ll get his towel back. “But what happens when…what if you were in Atlanta and you see’d the other you?”
“We do see each other sometimes. Older me, way, way older, when I’m a man with stubble on my face, he comes and sees me. He…umm…” Leonard shakes his head, “…he’s like my dad or something, helps me out. He’s taught me stuff, bad stuff like how to break security codes on doors, how to fight, how to steal clothes so I don’t get into trouble.”
“That’s so cool!”
“Yeah, right! I gotta know this stuff, so’s if I’m stuck in the past, I’m naked, I can get clothes or hide out - till I jump home, to my own time.”
“What if someone catches you? They’ll put you in jail!”
“He says, older me says, he’s been in jail lotsa times, but it’s no biggy.” And Jim sees Leonard do that shrug, like Sam and his friends do, like they think they’re all grown up or something.
“‘Cause you always disappear!” Jim giggles, rolls around on the grass, wishes he could do that. “Hey, Bone.. Leonard, can you teach me to fight?”
Leonard looks serious. “I dunno, kid, maybe, depends…who would you fight?”
“Jus’ people, lots of people.” Jim clenches his hands into fists, thinks Leonard’s going to say he’s bad, just like Frank always says he is, like those kids at school who tease him, say he’s a nerd, too damned smart for his own good, but they’re just dumb, that’s what Sam says. But Leonard doesn’t call him bad. “You gonna come back?”
Leonard nods. “Yeah, I’d like to but-”
“Can you come back an’ stop Mom marrying Frank?” Jim’s up on his feet now - Leonard can fix things - he can be a super-hero! Then his face falls when Leonard says quietly:
“Gram said I couldn’t change stuff. You can’t undo the past, she said. She’d tried, but stuff always happens the way it’s meant to. Anyways, I can’t choose where I jump to, even if I wanna come back.”
“But why can’t you teach me to fight? Please…? Show me now, come on-” Jim pulls at Leonard’s arm, wants to make him stand up but Bones doesn’t shift and Jim loses his balance and lands heavily on the grass…
Suddenly Jim yelps, leaps back up like he’s been yanked by the ear, and he’s jumping around, trying to escape the fire-brand in his hand.
“Ow, ow!” Jim shakes his hand like a snake trying to escape a sack. “I got stinged! Ouch! It hurts, it hurts!” He’s wedged his wrist under his armpit now, can’t stop the tears filling his eyes again; then he cups and examines his hand. It’s starting to go red and he can see the stinger. Breath short and angry, he crouches and scans the ground for the bee but he can’t see it anywhere.
“You’ll be fine, kid, don’t worry.” Leonard’s voice is soothing, kind, but he doesn’t come any closer. “We gotta take the stinger out or it’ll hurt more-“
Jim doesn’t know why, but he trusts Leonard, and he holds up a shaking hand so Leonard can pull out the sting. Leonard’s hands are much bigger than his and his fingers are long and cool. He knows Leonard’s noticed he’s crying and he can barely hear his own voice when he says, “I’m not a cry baby. It just hurts.”
“Nothing wrong with crying, Jim. I cry all the time and makes sense to cry when you’re hurtin’. Well, if I could bring stuff with me, I could’ve given you something from my daddy’s medkit.” Leonard ruffles Jim’s hair but Jim shrugs him off, wipes his nose with the back of his hand.
“I’m not a baby!” Jim pouts, indignant now. “Anyway, I’ll be okay. I’ve been hurt worse.”
“Yeah, I can see that,” Leonard says, his voice gruff. “What happened to your face, kid? Did ya fall over?” His eyes are dark, like his frowny eyebrows.
Jim shakes his head but he isn’t going to tell him, he’s not telling anyone.
“Mom says bicarb’s the best for bee stings.”
“You remember stuff, right?”
“Yeah, I do,” Jim says, suddenly feeling lighter. “I never forget anything. I get the best scores in math, history, science…” Leonard’s smiling while he listens - doesn’t think Jim’s showing off. “And I know lots of poems -- you wanna hear?”
“Yeah, I’d like that, but first wanna do something for the bee sting? It gets worse the longer you leave it.”
“But you said you haven’t got any stuff.”
“Hey - I remember things too, Jim. My gram says the best thing for a bee sting is four kinds of grass. You think you can find four kinds of grass for me? Can’t hurt to try, can it?”
Jim jumps up and sprints off to search the grasses surrounding them. “You need the stems or the leaves…?” He calls over his shoulder.
“Stems’ll do.”
Jim’s back and he dumps an armful of grass on the ground in front of Leonard. Jim holds out a hand and Leonard crouches down, breaks open the stems, twists them up and smears them across the swollen knuckle leaving a pale, green stain. His hands are gentle - makes Jim feel safe. Jim takes a deep breath.
“I know lots. I know about the weather. I know the names of the grass, see,” Jim says, rattling off the names. “This one’s buffalo grass and this one’s-“
Leonard’s kind eyes fix on Jim’s face, hold his gaze and Jim gulps, wishes he could keep Bones (because that’s totally Jim’s new secret name for Leonard now) keep him here to talk to and play with.
“I wanna come back, Jim. I just don’t know if I can. Sure looks like you could do with a friend.”
Jim stiffens, but doesn’t pull his hand away. “I got lotsa friends but…they’re lame. They don’t know anything and they get grounded ‘cause their moms say I’m bad, do stupid stuff. They’re not cool like you.”
Jim stops talking when Leonard stands up with a jolt, stumbles and doubles over, still hanging on to the towel. “Shit, I gotta…” he looks down at Jim, touches his shoulder lightly. Jim thinks Leonard might be sick or something, he’s rolling his head forward.
“I’m…damnit… I’m gonna go in a moment, so listen, listen good, okay?”
“Yeah, okay…” Jim’s trembling, doesn’t want his new, bestest friend to leave.
“I’ll try and come back, when I’m older, if I can figure out how to, and I’ll teach you how to fight …I prom...”
And Jim watches open mouthed as the towel drops to the ground and Bones is gone, like the Cheshire cat and, within seconds the space he’s filled is just late summer air again.
“Whoa…” Jim says and brings his sore hand up to his mouth to suck.
He waits a few minutes and picks up Bones’ towel, smells it, folds it reverently and pushes it into his rucksack. He looks around, hoping to see Bones again, missing his new friend already. He wishes he’d told Bones his name. He totally meant to, but he forgot and now Bones will never be able to find him.
+++
2257: San Francisco: Jim is 24, Leonard is 30
Leonard
Leonard sprints across the quad, relieved it’s still dark. He knows all the routes that avoid the security cameras, though with all the cut backs, he suspects most of them are dummies anyway. He’ll have to get Jim to hack into the system and find out for him - it’ll make this sort of shit, his fucking routine, so much easier. Least he’s been able to hide some clothing in various locations around the academy, but it only works out half the time when Leonard comes back from a jump. He doesn’t always return to the exact location he’s time-travelled from, but this time he’s been relatively lucky. He digs around in a grit container, locks it up again and slips into thrift shop sneakers and sweats and sprints back to their room.
This isn’t from running, he knows, rubbing his wet face with the palm of his hand. He takes a few calming breaths before punching in the code for their door. Leonard could run a marathon before he’d even begin to feel tired - this is fear. Fear that he might never have gotten this chance.
Leonard’s waited years for this moment, for this opportunity to go back to Jim, ever since Jim told him about what he’d been through.
Leonard’s jumped back, been with thirteen year old Jim for days, hidden out in the barn till Frank’s gone to work. He’s had time to teach Jim how to skin a rabbit, how to survive off berries, how to fix himself up with plants, how to survive his ordeal that Leonard’s known all along he couldn’t ever prevent from happening; Jim was always gonna keep fighting with Frank, always going to total the Chevvy, always going to end up being sent to Tarsus to stay with his aunt. But Leonard did what he could - he’s made damned sure the kid’s got all he needs to survive, knows how to hide out. And Leonard’s made sure Jim doesn’t starve.
Now it’s done and everything’s as it should be. Jim will make it, maybe he was always going to, but Leonard’s done what he can and made sure that it isn’t just dumb luck makes Jim survive Tarsus IV.
The chrono says 05:00, February 1st, 2257 - he’s only been away from the present for a few minutes though it’s ‘been’ days with Jim.
He undresses, throws his clothes to the foot of the bed. He steps over the pile of clothes, worn t-shirt and boxers he was sleeping in before he’d woken from a nightmare about Tarsus. Another dream, his mind tormenting him with imagined images of a young Jim running and hiding… then, seconds later, Leonard staggered to his feet and jumped out.
Now he’s home.
Jim presses back into Leonard when he slips into bed. “You’re all cold,” Jim mumbles, his voice rough from sleep. Leonard inhales his scent to ground himself, to be here. Jim reaches behind to take Leonard’s hand and wrap it round his chest. “Where you been?”
Leonard kisses him on the back of the head, pulls the covers up around them and says, “Nowhere special, I’m here now, Jim - with you. Go back to sleep. Tell you ‘bout it in the morning.”
ON TO PART 2