oops
X-posted to various places.
Yesterday I did a *bad food* day; the worst in 6 months. I'd bought a two-pack of steak, and I ate one steak then put the other one in the freezer... ran to the freezer and cooked/ate it. We went for a walk, then popped into the dev (we watched the tail-coated barman refuse entry to people who were wearing sportswear; he was a goth guard-dog. Viscious to those who looked too conventional within wider society.) I had one and a half pints of guinness and was tipsy as I don't usually drink anymore. We hit the supermarket and bought *bad food choices* then walked down the road to the proper fish and chip shop for some real chips. I made myself vomit a bit afterwards.
After I had sated myself, I had a conversation with my darling about how I am going to see this experience. The twelve-step way would be to say that I will be abstinent from compulsive overeating today, and that this is day one again. I don't want to forget the six months of success I had leading up to this. Having small slips has been something I have allowed as part of my abstinence; otherwise I wouldn't have been able to manage all that time. Yesterday felt like more of a big slip. I want to continue to move forward, but I do want to be honest about this in spaces I feel safe.
Good stuff: the council came to take my old, broken sofa this morning. They carried it down three flights of steps on a pretty narrow staircase. This service is free to those on benefits; I'm pretty damn greatful :-) I'm up early, and I'm going to do stuff with my gf before she heads off to see her GP.
Yesterday I did a *bad food* day; the worst in 6 months. I'd bought a two-pack of steak, and I ate one steak then put the other one in the freezer... ran to the freezer and cooked/ate it. We went for a walk, then popped into the dev (we watched the tail-coated barman refuse entry to people who were wearing sportswear; he was a goth guard-dog. Viscious to those who looked too conventional within wider society.) I had one and a half pints of guinness and was tipsy as I don't usually drink anymore. We hit the supermarket and bought *bad food choices* then walked down the road to the proper fish and chip shop for some real chips. I made myself vomit a bit afterwards.
After I had sated myself, I had a conversation with my darling about how I am going to see this experience. The twelve-step way would be to say that I will be abstinent from compulsive overeating today, and that this is day one again. I don't want to forget the six months of success I had leading up to this. Having small slips has been something I have allowed as part of my abstinence; otherwise I wouldn't have been able to manage all that time. Yesterday felt like more of a big slip. I want to continue to move forward, but I do want to be honest about this in spaces I feel safe.
Good stuff: the council came to take my old, broken sofa this morning. They carried it down three flights of steps on a pretty narrow staircase. This service is free to those on benefits; I'm pretty damn greatful :-) I'm up early, and I'm going to do stuff with my gf before she heads off to see her GP.