Ethan/Kristina, Near To You (9/10)
Title: Near To You
Author: sarahbell05
Fandom: General Hospital
Characters/Pairing: Ethan Lovett/Kristina Davis
Table: Relationship
Prompt: Duty
Rating: PG-13 for mentions of domestic abuse.
Warnings: Kristina is 17 and Ethan is in his early twenties.
Word Count: 2567
Summary: Ethan and Kristina deal with their loss.
Notes: Yeah...I have no excuses for why this took so long. I had major writer's block with this chapter, and it was incredibly difficult to write. One of the big inspirations for this chapter was The Script's song "For The First Time," so I highly recommend it. I hope y'all enjoy and the final chapter should be out ASAP!
Duty
Ethan's allowed to take Kristina home the next morning, with only a prescription for pain pills and an appointment with Lee in a week to show for the night's events. Kristina hasn't said a word since they were given the news, and Ethan doesn't push her. She spent most of the night in a fitful sleep, and Ethan had stayed awake and watched over her.
They arrive back at the house to find it cleaned and most of the empty boxes from their moving excursion gone. He knows Lulu and the others have been here, and he's grateful for once to have such a meddling family. Kristina doesn't notice or doesn't say anything, just moves to the couch and curls up on it. Ethan moves toward her and crouches down so he can be face to face with his girlfriend.
"Do you need anything love?" he asks, but she just shakes her head and stares right through him. He pushes himself up and moves into the kitchen, knowing Kristina needs to be alone. The urge to do something - anything - to help her is raging through him, but it's clear Kristina needs more time to process what's happened and he can't do anything but wait for her to be ready to receive his help.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next week is by far the hardest week of Ethan's life. The first few days, Kristina does little more than sleep and sit on the couch. He knows she's depressed, if the heartbreak she feels over the loss of their child is anything close to what he feels he's surprised she's still standing. She's a shell, and not even visits from her mom and sisters do anything to lift her spirits even a little.
Soon enough, the week the school gave her is up and she has to return. Ethan watches as she gets dressed in the same methodical, automatic way she has every day for past week. As she leaves, he tries to kiss her goodbye but she discreetly pulls away and gives him a quiet "bye" before heading out the front door and toward her car. He watches her leave before starting to get ready for his day. He's not supposed to be at the Star for another four hours, but the silence of being alone in the big house meant for him, Kristina, and their baby is too much to bear.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Even at the Star, with its distractions and copious amounts of alcohol, he can't escape what's happened. His thoughts are consumed with Kristina, and their lost baby. He couldn't believe that only one week ago he had been moving into a house with his pregnant girlfriend, hanging pictures and happily arguing over nursery decorations. Now, Kristina was little more than a ghost in their house and Ethan was little better. He was trying to be strong for Kristina, but after years of wandering and not caring about anything or anyone, Ethan was kicking himself for letting his guard down. This is what happened when you cared, he said to himself - you got hurt.
"Ethan." Lucky's greeting brings Ethan out of his thoughts, and he manages a small smirk and nod for his brother as he keeps on wiping the same spot on the bar he's been cleaning for the past twenty minutes.
"If you keep doing that, there's going to be a crater in my dad's bar." Lucky says, and Ethan shakes his head and moves the towel away with a mumbled "sorry."
"How's Kristina?" Lucky asks point blank, and Ethan stares at him wide-eyed. He and Lucky have never been especially close, so he assumes he's been chosen as the Spencer/Cassadine/Corinthos family ambassador to Ethan. He's giving Ethan a look, however, that tells him anything but the truth won't be tolerated.
"Not good." Ethan sighs heavily and throws the towel back on the bar, resting his forehead on his hands as he leans on the heavy wood. "She hasn't said more than six words since we came home from hospital. I try to get her to talk to me, but she won't. She just sits on the couch and stares at the television or sleep."
Lucky just looks at him for a moment, in a way that gives Ethan the urge to punch something. Not from anger at Lucky, really, but more from frustration at the entire situation.
"This wasn't supposed to happen." Ethan continues, pushing up away from the bar to pace behind it. "It wasn't supposed to be like this." It's the first time he's voiced any of his feelings about the situation, and if anything it makes the pain worse, because it makes it real.
"Look, Ethan." Lucky finally replies, shaking his head. "There's nothing you could have done or can do to change what happened. Give Kristina time, her whole life changed when she got pregnant, and it's just happened again."
"And my life didn't change?" Ethan snaps back.
"I'm not saying that. But she depends on you, she always has from the moment you met her."
Ethan just sighs, not wanting to voice the thoughts in his head because he can't even believe he's thinking them. He loves Kristina, but he can't help thinking that if he had never met her on the docks that day, had never befriended her, had never let her worm her way into his life and heart, none of this would have ever happened. She'd still be a carefree teenager and he'd still be the mysterious conman passing through town. They wouldn't have both been so close to something great only to have it ripped away from them.
His heart wouldn't be breaking.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
He's been at the Haunted Star for only a few hours when he gets the call from Michael. He has his car keys out and is heading toward the door before he even hangs up with his girlfriend's brother. It takes him half the usual time to get to Madison Prep, where Michael was waiting for him outside.
"What happened?" Ethan asks as soon as he stepped out of his car, his eyes searching the area for Kristina.
"Krissy got into a fight with some girls, I'm not sure exactly what was said. The Dean tried to take her to his office, but she just ran off. I tried to stop her, but she got in her car and left before I could. She was really upset though."
Ethan fights his natural urge to yell at the younger boy for letting his emotional girlfriend drive off on her own, and simply nodded and went back to his car. The entire drive back to their house, he hopes and prays that Kristina will be there. His hopes disappear though when he pulls into the empty driveway. He's about to put his car into reverse when he sees a light on on the second story. Deciding it's worth checking out, Ethan gets out of the car and makes his way inside the silent house. Reaching the upstairs, he realizes the light is on in the room that was supposed to be the nursery. Pushing the door aside, it looks exactly as they had left it a week earlier - paint swatches taped to the wall and a few spare pieces of furniture. As he turns to go, a piece of paper on one of the tables catches his eye. Taking it into his hand, he immediately recognizes Kristina's handwriting, despite the shaky penmanship.
I've gone back to Mom's.
I'm sorry.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ethan gives Kristina three days before he goes to the Lakehouse. Three days of miserable loneliness. It's only after she's gone that Ethan realizes how accustomed he was to having her around. Even as lost as she was, she was still the constant in his life. It's the middle of the day, so he's a little surprised when Alexis answers the door. She looks a little worse for wear, but he knows he's bound to look worse. She stares at him for a moment before nodding her head.
"I was wondering how long it would take you." she says, moving aside so he can slip past her. The living room is empty, and Alexis soon draws his attention back to her. "Ethan, I...I don't know what to do here. She won't talk to me, or Sam, or even Molly. She just...goes through the motions. Eats, bathes, sleeps, but nothing else. She only responds when you ask her something directly, and even then it's only a few words at a time. I thought she was doing a little better, but then she showed up here and asked if she could move back home. What happened?"
"I'm not sure. Michael said she got into a fight with some girls at Madison, and when I came home..." Ethan can't finish the sentence, the hurt and anger and resentment over finding Kristina gone still too fresh. He doesn't have to continue, though, because Alexis immediately raises her hand to silence him.
"I know I haven't been...the most supportive about this whole situation. I've always thought that you were too old for Kristina, that you were both too young to have a child. However, I know what you mean to her. If anyone can get through to her, it's you Ethan."
After Alexis dismisses him, Ethan makes his way toward Kristina's bedroom. He can hear the TV coming from her room, but it's the only sound he hears. Deciding that if he knocks she'll probably just tell him to go away, he pushes the door open as quietly as he can. She's curled up on top of the bed, hugging a pillow. Whatever old movie she's watching has obviously put her to sleep, and Ethan moves toward her.
As he sits next to her on the bed, he can't fight the urge to touch her, pushing the hair out of her face. This rouses her, and in her half-asleep state she smiles at him as she opens her eyes.
"Ethan." she whispers, and for a moment they're like they were only a few weeks ago. She's his Krissy again, and he's the reluctant hero of her daydreams. Too soon, though, she comes crashing back to reality and pushes him away, moving as far away from him as she can on the small bed, pulling her knees up around her chest.
"What are you doing here?" she finally asks, her voice full of nervous tension. She's looking anywhere but at Ethan, so he just sighs and replies honestly.
"I'm worried about you. You just left, Kristina."
"I left a note." she replies, and Ethan can tell even she knows that's lame.
"What happened at the school?" he asks, and Kristina is off the bed like it's on fire, pacing around the room.
"I don't want to talk about it." she says, but now Ethan's determined to know even more. He pushes himself off the bed and tries to get her attention. when it doesn't work, he places his hand on her arm.
This sets her off again, and she pushes him away with more force than he thought she could muster. He nearly trips over the bed, but catches himself. He looks back at Kristina, and sees her eyes filled with shock. Her hand claps over her mouth and he can see the tears welling in her eyes. She sobs loudly and within a second Ethan's arms are wrapped around her. She fights him, trying to push him away, but he only holds on tighter, prepared this time.
"Ethan...please...don't..." He's not sure what she means, but he has a feeling she doesn't either. She continues to sob heavily, but she soon stops trying to push him away, instead clinging to his shirt.
Somehow, he guides them to the bed and pulls her down on top of him. She never lets go of his shirt, and continues to cry. He hasn't seen her cry since that first night at the hospital, so he's thankful she's finally getting some of this out of her system. He's not sure how long they stay there, but they eventually both doze off. When he awakens, the sun is starting to set and Kristina is making little circles with her finger on his shirt. He moves slightly to let her know he's awake, moving his arm tighter around her shoulders. Her finger stops moving, but she doesn't try to pull away.
"They said I deserved it." she says after a few moments. "Those girls at school. They said I deserved to lose the baby, for leaving a 'nice guy' like Kiefer for some conman. That it was God's way of making me pay for my sins."
Ethan's silent, his body filling with rage at these girls he doesn't even know. He forces himself to calm down, though, knowing that Kristina needs support and not some caveman trying to protect her.
"They're wrong, Krissy. You didn't deserve any of this, we didn't deserve any of this. It's a horrible tragedy, but it isn't God's work or anyone else's. It was an accident, and none of it was your fault."
"But it is, don't you see?" Kristina says, pushing off of him so she can sit up. "I pushed myself too hard. You kept telling me to take it easy, and I didn't listen. I pushed and pushed and refused to listen and then..."
"Kristina." Ethan replies, sitting up himself and taking her hands in his. "There was nothing you could have done, you know that. Dr. Lee said, it wasn't anything you did or didn't do. It just happened. And anyone who tries to tell you different is wrong. You know the truth, and I know the truth, and we love each other and that's all that matters."
"You still love me?" Kristina asks, the shock on her face feeling like a punch in the gut to Ethan. He cups her face with his hands, wiping away the fresh tears slipping down her face.
"Krissy, I don't know when it happened, or how, or why, but I think I've loved you since that first day on the docks when I saw you fighting with Michael. I wanted to believe I just had a soft spot for you because you were a sweet girl in a horrible situation, but then you became my best friend - the best friend I've ever had. Then you got pregnant and for the first time in years I was going to have a family. With you. So, yes, I still love you. I always will Kristina, don't you get that?"
Kristina doesn't respond, just sobs once more and leans in toward him, her lips brushing his. It's the first time she's kissed him in weeks, and it feels like coming home to Ethan. He responds, pulling her into his lap. He lets his lips drift down her jar and toward her neck. Kristina breathes heavily against him, and occasionally he hears whispers of "love" and "so sorry." When it goes as far as he dares in her mother's house, he pulls away, looking her in the eye.
"So, are you coming home now?" he asks, and even if Kristina's smile is still not what it used to be, that and her nod of assent are enough to make him pull her toward him once again.
Author: sarahbell05
Fandom: General Hospital
Characters/Pairing: Ethan Lovett/Kristina Davis
Table: Relationship
Prompt: Duty
Rating: PG-13 for mentions of domestic abuse.
Warnings: Kristina is 17 and Ethan is in his early twenties.
Word Count: 2567
Summary: Ethan and Kristina deal with their loss.
Notes: Yeah...I have no excuses for why this took so long. I had major writer's block with this chapter, and it was incredibly difficult to write. One of the big inspirations for this chapter was The Script's song "For The First Time," so I highly recommend it. I hope y'all enjoy and the final chapter should be out ASAP!
Duty
Ethan's allowed to take Kristina home the next morning, with only a prescription for pain pills and an appointment with Lee in a week to show for the night's events. Kristina hasn't said a word since they were given the news, and Ethan doesn't push her. She spent most of the night in a fitful sleep, and Ethan had stayed awake and watched over her.
They arrive back at the house to find it cleaned and most of the empty boxes from their moving excursion gone. He knows Lulu and the others have been here, and he's grateful for once to have such a meddling family. Kristina doesn't notice or doesn't say anything, just moves to the couch and curls up on it. Ethan moves toward her and crouches down so he can be face to face with his girlfriend.
"Do you need anything love?" he asks, but she just shakes her head and stares right through him. He pushes himself up and moves into the kitchen, knowing Kristina needs to be alone. The urge to do something - anything - to help her is raging through him, but it's clear Kristina needs more time to process what's happened and he can't do anything but wait for her to be ready to receive his help.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next week is by far the hardest week of Ethan's life. The first few days, Kristina does little more than sleep and sit on the couch. He knows she's depressed, if the heartbreak she feels over the loss of their child is anything close to what he feels he's surprised she's still standing. She's a shell, and not even visits from her mom and sisters do anything to lift her spirits even a little.
Soon enough, the week the school gave her is up and she has to return. Ethan watches as she gets dressed in the same methodical, automatic way she has every day for past week. As she leaves, he tries to kiss her goodbye but she discreetly pulls away and gives him a quiet "bye" before heading out the front door and toward her car. He watches her leave before starting to get ready for his day. He's not supposed to be at the Star for another four hours, but the silence of being alone in the big house meant for him, Kristina, and their baby is too much to bear.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Even at the Star, with its distractions and copious amounts of alcohol, he can't escape what's happened. His thoughts are consumed with Kristina, and their lost baby. He couldn't believe that only one week ago he had been moving into a house with his pregnant girlfriend, hanging pictures and happily arguing over nursery decorations. Now, Kristina was little more than a ghost in their house and Ethan was little better. He was trying to be strong for Kristina, but after years of wandering and not caring about anything or anyone, Ethan was kicking himself for letting his guard down. This is what happened when you cared, he said to himself - you got hurt.
"Ethan." Lucky's greeting brings Ethan out of his thoughts, and he manages a small smirk and nod for his brother as he keeps on wiping the same spot on the bar he's been cleaning for the past twenty minutes.
"If you keep doing that, there's going to be a crater in my dad's bar." Lucky says, and Ethan shakes his head and moves the towel away with a mumbled "sorry."
"How's Kristina?" Lucky asks point blank, and Ethan stares at him wide-eyed. He and Lucky have never been especially close, so he assumes he's been chosen as the Spencer/Cassadine/Corinthos family ambassador to Ethan. He's giving Ethan a look, however, that tells him anything but the truth won't be tolerated.
"Not good." Ethan sighs heavily and throws the towel back on the bar, resting his forehead on his hands as he leans on the heavy wood. "She hasn't said more than six words since we came home from hospital. I try to get her to talk to me, but she won't. She just sits on the couch and stares at the television or sleep."
Lucky just looks at him for a moment, in a way that gives Ethan the urge to punch something. Not from anger at Lucky, really, but more from frustration at the entire situation.
"This wasn't supposed to happen." Ethan continues, pushing up away from the bar to pace behind it. "It wasn't supposed to be like this." It's the first time he's voiced any of his feelings about the situation, and if anything it makes the pain worse, because it makes it real.
"Look, Ethan." Lucky finally replies, shaking his head. "There's nothing you could have done or can do to change what happened. Give Kristina time, her whole life changed when she got pregnant, and it's just happened again."
"And my life didn't change?" Ethan snaps back.
"I'm not saying that. But she depends on you, she always has from the moment you met her."
Ethan just sighs, not wanting to voice the thoughts in his head because he can't even believe he's thinking them. He loves Kristina, but he can't help thinking that if he had never met her on the docks that day, had never befriended her, had never let her worm her way into his life and heart, none of this would have ever happened. She'd still be a carefree teenager and he'd still be the mysterious conman passing through town. They wouldn't have both been so close to something great only to have it ripped away from them.
His heart wouldn't be breaking.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
He's been at the Haunted Star for only a few hours when he gets the call from Michael. He has his car keys out and is heading toward the door before he even hangs up with his girlfriend's brother. It takes him half the usual time to get to Madison Prep, where Michael was waiting for him outside.
"What happened?" Ethan asks as soon as he stepped out of his car, his eyes searching the area for Kristina.
"Krissy got into a fight with some girls, I'm not sure exactly what was said. The Dean tried to take her to his office, but she just ran off. I tried to stop her, but she got in her car and left before I could. She was really upset though."
Ethan fights his natural urge to yell at the younger boy for letting his emotional girlfriend drive off on her own, and simply nodded and went back to his car. The entire drive back to their house, he hopes and prays that Kristina will be there. His hopes disappear though when he pulls into the empty driveway. He's about to put his car into reverse when he sees a light on on the second story. Deciding it's worth checking out, Ethan gets out of the car and makes his way inside the silent house. Reaching the upstairs, he realizes the light is on in the room that was supposed to be the nursery. Pushing the door aside, it looks exactly as they had left it a week earlier - paint swatches taped to the wall and a few spare pieces of furniture. As he turns to go, a piece of paper on one of the tables catches his eye. Taking it into his hand, he immediately recognizes Kristina's handwriting, despite the shaky penmanship.
I've gone back to Mom's.
I'm sorry.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ethan gives Kristina three days before he goes to the Lakehouse. Three days of miserable loneliness. It's only after she's gone that Ethan realizes how accustomed he was to having her around. Even as lost as she was, she was still the constant in his life. It's the middle of the day, so he's a little surprised when Alexis answers the door. She looks a little worse for wear, but he knows he's bound to look worse. She stares at him for a moment before nodding her head.
"I was wondering how long it would take you." she says, moving aside so he can slip past her. The living room is empty, and Alexis soon draws his attention back to her. "Ethan, I...I don't know what to do here. She won't talk to me, or Sam, or even Molly. She just...goes through the motions. Eats, bathes, sleeps, but nothing else. She only responds when you ask her something directly, and even then it's only a few words at a time. I thought she was doing a little better, but then she showed up here and asked if she could move back home. What happened?"
"I'm not sure. Michael said she got into a fight with some girls at Madison, and when I came home..." Ethan can't finish the sentence, the hurt and anger and resentment over finding Kristina gone still too fresh. He doesn't have to continue, though, because Alexis immediately raises her hand to silence him.
"I know I haven't been...the most supportive about this whole situation. I've always thought that you were too old for Kristina, that you were both too young to have a child. However, I know what you mean to her. If anyone can get through to her, it's you Ethan."
After Alexis dismisses him, Ethan makes his way toward Kristina's bedroom. He can hear the TV coming from her room, but it's the only sound he hears. Deciding that if he knocks she'll probably just tell him to go away, he pushes the door open as quietly as he can. She's curled up on top of the bed, hugging a pillow. Whatever old movie she's watching has obviously put her to sleep, and Ethan moves toward her.
As he sits next to her on the bed, he can't fight the urge to touch her, pushing the hair out of her face. This rouses her, and in her half-asleep state she smiles at him as she opens her eyes.
"Ethan." she whispers, and for a moment they're like they were only a few weeks ago. She's his Krissy again, and he's the reluctant hero of her daydreams. Too soon, though, she comes crashing back to reality and pushes him away, moving as far away from him as she can on the small bed, pulling her knees up around her chest.
"What are you doing here?" she finally asks, her voice full of nervous tension. She's looking anywhere but at Ethan, so he just sighs and replies honestly.
"I'm worried about you. You just left, Kristina."
"I left a note." she replies, and Ethan can tell even she knows that's lame.
"What happened at the school?" he asks, and Kristina is off the bed like it's on fire, pacing around the room.
"I don't want to talk about it." she says, but now Ethan's determined to know even more. He pushes himself off the bed and tries to get her attention. when it doesn't work, he places his hand on her arm.
This sets her off again, and she pushes him away with more force than he thought she could muster. He nearly trips over the bed, but catches himself. He looks back at Kristina, and sees her eyes filled with shock. Her hand claps over her mouth and he can see the tears welling in her eyes. She sobs loudly and within a second Ethan's arms are wrapped around her. She fights him, trying to push him away, but he only holds on tighter, prepared this time.
"Ethan...please...don't..." He's not sure what she means, but he has a feeling she doesn't either. She continues to sob heavily, but she soon stops trying to push him away, instead clinging to his shirt.
Somehow, he guides them to the bed and pulls her down on top of him. She never lets go of his shirt, and continues to cry. He hasn't seen her cry since that first night at the hospital, so he's thankful she's finally getting some of this out of her system. He's not sure how long they stay there, but they eventually both doze off. When he awakens, the sun is starting to set and Kristina is making little circles with her finger on his shirt. He moves slightly to let her know he's awake, moving his arm tighter around her shoulders. Her finger stops moving, but she doesn't try to pull away.
"They said I deserved it." she says after a few moments. "Those girls at school. They said I deserved to lose the baby, for leaving a 'nice guy' like Kiefer for some conman. That it was God's way of making me pay for my sins."
Ethan's silent, his body filling with rage at these girls he doesn't even know. He forces himself to calm down, though, knowing that Kristina needs support and not some caveman trying to protect her.
"They're wrong, Krissy. You didn't deserve any of this, we didn't deserve any of this. It's a horrible tragedy, but it isn't God's work or anyone else's. It was an accident, and none of it was your fault."
"But it is, don't you see?" Kristina says, pushing off of him so she can sit up. "I pushed myself too hard. You kept telling me to take it easy, and I didn't listen. I pushed and pushed and refused to listen and then..."
"Kristina." Ethan replies, sitting up himself and taking her hands in his. "There was nothing you could have done, you know that. Dr. Lee said, it wasn't anything you did or didn't do. It just happened. And anyone who tries to tell you different is wrong. You know the truth, and I know the truth, and we love each other and that's all that matters."
"You still love me?" Kristina asks, the shock on her face feeling like a punch in the gut to Ethan. He cups her face with his hands, wiping away the fresh tears slipping down her face.
"Krissy, I don't know when it happened, or how, or why, but I think I've loved you since that first day on the docks when I saw you fighting with Michael. I wanted to believe I just had a soft spot for you because you were a sweet girl in a horrible situation, but then you became my best friend - the best friend I've ever had. Then you got pregnant and for the first time in years I was going to have a family. With you. So, yes, I still love you. I always will Kristina, don't you get that?"
Kristina doesn't respond, just sobs once more and leans in toward him, her lips brushing his. It's the first time she's kissed him in weeks, and it feels like coming home to Ethan. He responds, pulling her into his lap. He lets his lips drift down her jar and toward her neck. Kristina breathes heavily against him, and occasionally he hears whispers of "love" and "so sorry." When it goes as far as he dares in her mother's house, he pulls away, looking her in the eye.
"So, are you coming home now?" he asks, and even if Kristina's smile is still not what it used to be, that and her nod of assent are enough to make him pull her toward him once again.