The Sarah You Have Reached Is Temporarily Out Of Service.
So, trying to modify this post, but I son't know what's wrong with the page. Anyway, I just want to sahre this:
http://paper-bird.net/2012/12/04/cairo-diary-december-2012-walls-women-rape-fear/
I'm in the first picture, in the center. Haven't been back since, despite my fiery rhetoric. Ashamed to leave anyone reading this believing I'm out there giving my all. Kinda sick right now - haven't been well for a week, honestly. My housemate tells me it's because I'm not taking time to rest and am rushing about doing stuff while I have a cold. But the last two days my blood pressure has just been uncontrollable. My meds were changed maybe three months ago, never had any trouble, but this relentless, unchanging spike - TBH, it's scaring me a little. Housemate makes me concentrated hibiscus tea, which is the only thing that works after the blood pressure meds fail. Not whining, just... ah, hell, idek. Being sick makes me unable to participate in anything, too - ever since I put up the tent and camped out that first day in Tahrir, I've been unable to repeat the performance.
Good excuse, right? I mean, being sick and all? Well, yes, but I haven't been sick in *bed* - I helped a friend buy a computer, another friend to give a concert, a third to fix up his house, and taught twice this week and wrote a few paragraphs of Yuletide - but mostly it's all been money-help, no effort. (I remember I was with two friends I love, and I picked up the tab, at a restaurant, and one of them asked "Why does she do that?" and the one who knows me better replied, "It makes her feel in control." It hurt like FUCK, but it's true - like my dad, I try to retain control of events/people/circumstances by assuming the financial high ground [I don't feel at all qualified to assume the moral or intellectual high ground] and tend to try and solve problems by throwing money at them.) And it's kinda funny, because I'm not even rich. But - I spent money on buying a tent, I went and set it up in Tahrir, and then after one night, I never showed up. It's like I'd cleared my conscience by spending, which is, I imagine, the hallmark of a consumer society...
Well, I'm a shopper, it would be foolish as well as mendacious to deny it.
OTOH, I'm taking part, a little, in a uni profs' mailing list. Most of them are anti-Brotherhood, but the lawyers and the doctors especially are completely taken over by these SOB's - but they're not on the mailing list anyway. Typing Arabic isn't something I know how to do, so it's hard, so it gives me a bit of a sense of achievement.
ETA: The clashes outside the Presidential palace... WTF'ing F? They're calling out fucking Brotherhood commandos. I don't even. WTFWTFWTF.
Well. My cold is going, ear infection seems to be clearing, and my brain finally doesn't feel like it's going to explode out of my skull every time I move - so, to the front lines? I don't know. Some friends are telling me the front lines are only for those who can run, and I'm not one of those. One of the various marches? Too lazy and complacent, i think...
http://paper-bird.net/2012/12/04/cairo-diary-december-2012-walls-women-rape-fear/
I'm in the first picture, in the center. Haven't been back since, despite my fiery rhetoric. Ashamed to leave anyone reading this believing I'm out there giving my all. Kinda sick right now - haven't been well for a week, honestly. My housemate tells me it's because I'm not taking time to rest and am rushing about doing stuff while I have a cold. But the last two days my blood pressure has just been uncontrollable. My meds were changed maybe three months ago, never had any trouble, but this relentless, unchanging spike - TBH, it's scaring me a little. Housemate makes me concentrated hibiscus tea, which is the only thing that works after the blood pressure meds fail. Not whining, just... ah, hell, idek. Being sick makes me unable to participate in anything, too - ever since I put up the tent and camped out that first day in Tahrir, I've been unable to repeat the performance.
Good excuse, right? I mean, being sick and all? Well, yes, but I haven't been sick in *bed* - I helped a friend buy a computer, another friend to give a concert, a third to fix up his house, and taught twice this week and wrote a few paragraphs of Yuletide - but mostly it's all been money-help, no effort. (I remember I was with two friends I love, and I picked up the tab, at a restaurant, and one of them asked "Why does she do that?" and the one who knows me better replied, "It makes her feel in control." It hurt like FUCK, but it's true - like my dad, I try to retain control of events/people/circumstances by assuming the financial high ground [I don't feel at all qualified to assume the moral or intellectual high ground] and tend to try and solve problems by throwing money at them.) And it's kinda funny, because I'm not even rich. But - I spent money on buying a tent, I went and set it up in Tahrir, and then after one night, I never showed up. It's like I'd cleared my conscience by spending, which is, I imagine, the hallmark of a consumer society...
Well, I'm a shopper, it would be foolish as well as mendacious to deny it.
OTOH, I'm taking part, a little, in a uni profs' mailing list. Most of them are anti-Brotherhood, but the lawyers and the doctors especially are completely taken over by these SOB's - but they're not on the mailing list anyway. Typing Arabic isn't something I know how to do, so it's hard, so it gives me a bit of a sense of achievement.
ETA: The clashes outside the Presidential palace... WTF'ing F? They're calling out fucking Brotherhood commandos. I don't even. WTFWTFWTF.
Well. My cold is going, ear infection seems to be clearing, and my brain finally doesn't feel like it's going to explode out of my skull every time I move - so, to the front lines? I don't know. Some friends are telling me the front lines are only for those who can run, and I'm not one of those. One of the various marches? Too lazy and complacent, i think...