(no subject)
I love you, Emily. This is GOLD
DowntwnSaraBrown: I think that petland gave me a defunct rat
emieharrison: ha ha why?
DowntwnSaraBrown: becaues he's crazy
DowntwnSaraBrown: like I think he's having breathing problems
DowntwnSaraBrown: and he scratches himself a lot
emieharrison: take him back and be like "UH....look"
emieharrison: how much did he cost?
DowntwnSaraBrown: he was free because I bought all this other crap
DowntwnSaraBrown: but I picked him out
emieharrison: that doesn't matter
emieharrison: how much would he cost regular
emieharrison: get a pre-vet person to look at him
DowntwnSaraBrown: like 3 dollars
emieharrison: ha ha
DowntwnSaraBrown: its a rat.
emieharrison: well, if he dies, I'll get you a new one
DowntwnSaraBrown: people buy them to feed to snakes
emieharrison: I know
DowntwnSaraBrown: oh he's licking his giant balls
DowntwnSaraBrown: gross
emieharrison: ha ha
emieharrison: hes well endowed?
DowntwnSaraBrown: he's HUNG
emieharrison: ha ha I cna't stop laughing
DowntwnSaraBrown: like, if he were a human he would have balls the size of basketballs
emieharrison: ha ha
DowntwnSaraBrown: combined they're seriously about 3/4 the size of his head
emieharrison: is that why you got him?
DowntwnSaraBrown: no
DowntwnSaraBrown: I didn't really notice until after I got him
emieharrison: because I would have gotten him just because he had like HUGE balls
emieharrison: I would have been like, "Yeah, can you find me the one with the biggest balls"
DowntwnSaraBrown: lol
DowntwnSaraBrown: LOL
emieharrison: Or I would have said, "Do you have any uni-ballers?"
DowntwnSaraBrown: Yeah, hi can I have a rat who has undergone surgery for testicular cancer cause I want a real fight
DowntwnSaraBrown: fighter*
emieharrison: ha ha!\
emieharrison: ha ha
emieharrison: this is the greatest conversation topic of life
DowntwnSaraBrown: rat balls?
emieharrison: in fact, I think the next date I go on I'll start it off with talking about rat balls
DowntwnSaraBrown: what an icebreaker!
DowntwnSaraBrown: Hi I'm Emily, and I'd really love to know your thoughts on rat testes
emieharrison: ha ha
emieharrison: I can't stop laughing
emieharrison: I'm going to pee in my pants...
DowntwnSaraBrown: do it!
emieharrison: not gonna lie, I squirted
DowntwnSaraBrown: I think that petland gave me a defunct rat
emieharrison: ha ha why?
DowntwnSaraBrown: becaues he's crazy
DowntwnSaraBrown: like I think he's having breathing problems
DowntwnSaraBrown: and he scratches himself a lot
emieharrison: take him back and be like "UH....look"
emieharrison: how much did he cost?
DowntwnSaraBrown: he was free because I bought all this other crap
DowntwnSaraBrown: but I picked him out
emieharrison: that doesn't matter
emieharrison: how much would he cost regular
emieharrison: get a pre-vet person to look at him
DowntwnSaraBrown: like 3 dollars
emieharrison: ha ha
DowntwnSaraBrown: its a rat.
emieharrison: well, if he dies, I'll get you a new one
DowntwnSaraBrown: people buy them to feed to snakes
emieharrison: I know
DowntwnSaraBrown: oh he's licking his giant balls
DowntwnSaraBrown: gross
emieharrison: ha ha
emieharrison: hes well endowed?
DowntwnSaraBrown: he's HUNG
emieharrison: ha ha I cna't stop laughing
DowntwnSaraBrown: like, if he were a human he would have balls the size of basketballs
emieharrison: ha ha
DowntwnSaraBrown: combined they're seriously about 3/4 the size of his head
emieharrison: is that why you got him?
DowntwnSaraBrown: no
DowntwnSaraBrown: I didn't really notice until after I got him
emieharrison: because I would have gotten him just because he had like HUGE balls
emieharrison: I would have been like, "Yeah, can you find me the one with the biggest balls"
DowntwnSaraBrown: lol
DowntwnSaraBrown: LOL
emieharrison: Or I would have said, "Do you have any uni-ballers?"
DowntwnSaraBrown: Yeah, hi can I have a rat who has undergone surgery for testicular cancer cause I want a real fight
DowntwnSaraBrown: fighter*
emieharrison: ha ha!\
emieharrison: ha ha
emieharrison: this is the greatest conversation topic of life
DowntwnSaraBrown: rat balls?
emieharrison: in fact, I think the next date I go on I'll start it off with talking about rat balls
DowntwnSaraBrown: what an icebreaker!
DowntwnSaraBrown: Hi I'm Emily, and I'd really love to know your thoughts on rat testes
emieharrison: ha ha
emieharrison: I can't stop laughing
emieharrison: I'm going to pee in my pants...
DowntwnSaraBrown: do it!
emieharrison: not gonna lie, I squirted