sketching missing pieces » oneshot.
Sketching Missing Pieces.
Yunho/Jaejoong.
(pretty much mainly) Fluff, AU.
Jaejoong's mind can only process simple things, but the most complex of them all is that he knows for sure how much he is capable to love.
{i need to learn how to write summaries}
"Yunho, it's so good to see you!"
Hardly giving him time to breathe, Yunho became smothered in the embrace of a much older but much shorter lady. He smiled, giving into her strong squeeze - the one he had always joked was enough to kill a small animal, until she had insisted that she would never do something like that and to never assume it again. The memory plastered a larger grin on his face as she began to sway him side to side slowly.
"I've missed coming here too, ajumma." he admitted.
"Yah!" she squealed, slapping Yunho's arm, "None of that 'ajumma' stuff. I'm Yaejun-noona! I'm so not old enough to be an ajumma!"
He laughed, watching her face crinkle in disapproval of the referral, "But you are married Yaejun-noona!"
"Yes, well..." Yaejun said slowly, "Ah, Suhoon... I'm really starting to miss that softie..." she admitted, sniffling. Yunho reached out to place a comforting arm on her shoulder which ended up as another hug. He brushed his fingers through her shoulder-length hair as she trembled in his hold.
"Sorry, I'm being silly." Yaejun said, stepping away from Yunho - who stood shaking his head in comfort - and wiping her eyes, "It's another story. I'm sure there's a completely different reason you're here."
Looking down at his feet, Yunho nodded.
"He's missed you a lot, Yunho. I couldn't get him to calm down for three days after I told him you were going to be away for six months."
Yunho bit his lip in guilt, "I'm sorry, Yaejun-noona... I just..."
She cupped his face and shushed him, "No need to be sorry. You did what you had to do. He's been okay. Sometimes when he sees the photos of you two he gets upset, but recently, he's perked up."
Touched, Yunho smiled gently. He pressed a small kiss to Yaejun's cheek and began to look around. The parts of the house he could see hadn't changed. There was still the red staircase and the matching red carpeted hallway. The pictures of him and the one person he was dying to see hung on the walls, the only thing changed being the frames that they were locked into. The kitchen was still black and cream, the legendary blender lying atop the counter. Yunho recalled how many times he'd attempted to make a smoothie with it, using mud and milk, assuming it was a good idea.
And to his right, the white carpet of the living room was still littered in random magazines and colouring pens and pencils that Yunho assumed were his. He never did tidy up. The brown leather sofas remained in the same place they had been in when he'd left the house for the last time. The only thing that he could see different about the living room was a small drawing on the mirror of a small stick boy and a taller stick boy holding hands, one with floppy black markerpen hair and one with spikey brown felt-tip pen hair.
Yunho could imagine Yaejun staring at the picture in disbelief, deciding to praise him for it before breaking down on the inside, wondering of a million different ways of how to get it off but make sure she wasn't insulting him by removing his picture. He was always proud of his drawings. But Yunho knew he was much more talented than stick boys and girls.
"Is he out right now?" Yunho questioned, his eyes not landing on the petite charcol-headed boy that he was trying to find.
The elder lady shook her head, "I didn't tell him you were coming. I thought it'd be a better surprise if you just turned up outside his bedroom door. And you know he hates to answer the door."
Yunho nodded and grinned, unable to hold in the excitement of seeing him again for the first time in six months. He'd been the only thing on his mind whilst he'd been away studying - his brain refusing to let him think of anything other than whether he was okay, whether he was eating, whether he was behaving, whether he was missing him, whether he was taking his medicine...
Yunho looked up from his daydream, to find Yaejun in one of her own. When he clicked his fingers in front of her face, her body returned to Earth but her mind seemed to stay wherever it'd been. She smiled gently but sadly, her hands beginning to fiddle with the cross pendent attatched to the chain around her neck - and Yunho knew that that meant she was nervous.
"He's fine, right, Yaejun?" Yunho asked worriedly, his voice a couple of knotches higher and much more frantic.
She let out a small giggle and rested an hand on his arm, "Of course he is, Yunho. I'm sorry. I'm not used to having someone realise my nervous habits. He doesn't ever take into account my actions, he's always too busy with other things. The only people who'd ever notice it were you and Suhoon. And you've both been gone so long..." She covered her mouth before she began to cry again, as if she'd catch her sobs in her hand. She swallowed, calming herself and tried again.
"I'm so sorry, Yunho. I just... he's missed you. Really alot. Worse than I said. And I thought I was going to go mad. You're always the best one to calm him down when he's like that. And Suhoon is the one who keeps me sane when I feel hopeless and can't control him. I don't know what it is. We've disconnected and it makes me so mad with myself. What kind of umma does it make me, eh?" Yaejun spoke slowly, her eyes turning glossy and her cheeks flushing red. She sighed and threw her head back to pull her hair from her face.
"I'm just so glad you're back, Yunho." she said, rubbing the emotion from her face. Yunho smiled and ran a hand through her hair again.
"And Suhoon's back in two weeks, isn't he?" Yunho asked.
She nodded, "It'll be fine soon. It'll be back to normal. Everything will click into place and he'll be happy again. I can't stand to see him sad.
He just looks so dead. Like his entire life has been sucked from him."
Yunho bit his lip. It couldn't be this bad. But he began to fear what kind of state he'd find when he went upstairs.
"Look. Enough of this. You need to go to him. Now." Yaejun said, pushing Yunho towards the stairs with a perkier voice and a laugh waiting to escape, "I know you remember exactly which room. He hasn't moved. I expect you both down within the next two hours, because I'm making dinner! Go! Go now..."
Leaning down to steal a peck from her cheek, Yunho laughed as he was pushed up the stairs. He started to jog up the first flight, instantly recognising the pictures on the walls on the first floor. In a way, this felt more like home than his actual house. And he supposed that that may've been because he'd dumped his bags to come straight here.
He made climbing the second flight of stairs look easy, taking two at a time. Whatever to close the space between him and the angel that he assumed was sat, probably sketching, in his room.
Arriving outside the familiar door, he realised that the music seeping under the door and through the walls was in fact F.T. Island. A band that the other had downright refused to ever listen to, even if Yunho did like them. The chorus of I Hope flowed through the air, and a voice on the other side sang along, the melody of the music mixing beautifully with the sound of said voice.
Yunho smiled. This was it.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
"Who is it~?!" The voice sang from the other side, "Can I have some biscuits, Umma? I'm hungry~"
A beam found it's way onto Yunho's face at the other's words. He really had no idea that he was coming.
The white door opened to reveal the face that Yunho had been waiting to see for six months. And along with the house, he had not changed. His hair still perfectly framed his face even without any attempt to do so, the darkness a blatent contrast to his white and flawless skin, still looking as if he'd been carved from ivory. He was still half-a-head shorter than Yunho himself and petite. Yunho even noticed that he was wearing the same rings he wore, as well as a pair of cross earrings that Yunho himself had bought him for his birthday the year he'd gotten his ears pierced. His usual smell of apples and chocolate added onto the visual force of him and it all stunned Yunho for a few seconds before he broke into a massive smile.
"Jaejoong-ah..." Yunho breathed.
"Ah... Yunnie... is that really you?" Jaejoong asked, tilting his head to the left, "I don't want more lies. If you're a dream then tell me now because I don't like it when you visit me here. You aren't my real Yunho-yah." he whined, puffing his cheeks out and crossing his arms.
Yunho laughed a little before pouting, himself, "I promise, Joongie. It's me! I'm back!"
Hesitantly, Jaejoong unfolded his arms and let the air from his cheeks slowly, worried and excited all at the same time. Yunho watched conflicting emotions flash behind the eyes of the other, his head mixing up different concoctions of ideas, deciding whether to believe the person before him nor not.
"Are... are you really? Really? Forever? Are you back forever?!"
Nodding, Yunho smiled, "I'm back forever, Joongie."
Jaejoong squealed in delight, his face glowing and joy wracking his body. He jumped at Yunho, toppling them both backwards and out into the hallway, crashing to the floor with Jaejoong on top of him. He giggled and Yunho began to wonder why he'd ever considered leaving, even for a little while - when he could hear Jaejoong laugh every day.
"I missed you, Yunnie! Really, I did!" Jaejoong screamed, as if he said it louder then it'd make it more believable. He nestled his head into the crook of Yunho's neck, a content smile resting on his face as the latter sat up and wound his arms around him. Yunho felt him start to slacken, the hyperactive outburst slowly subsiding and a relaxed beautiful boy lying in his arms.
"I missed you too, Jaejoongie." Yunho confessed, running his fingers through his ebony locks before brushing the fringe from Jaejoong's eyes. Massive orbs looked up at him, round and glassy and Yunho began to worry. Instead of the calm and relaxed boy he'd believed he was holding, instead he was still het up and hysterical, but instead he was upset, and stressed. Yunho watched in horror as Jaejoong began to bite down harshly on his pink petals.
"Ah, Jaejoong-ah, don't do that." He said, putting his finger on the other's lips. Jaejoong only bit his lips when he was nervous, upset or excited, usually to the point where they'd bleed. Sometimes he didn't even realise that he was bleeding until he could taste it or until Yunho, Yaejun or Suhoon began fussing over him.
"It's okay, I promise. I won't leave you again." Yunho vowed, linking his fingers with the other's.
Jaejoong pouted when Yunho had managed to pull his lip from his teeth just before he pierced the skin, "I'm sorry, Yunho-yah."
"Don't be sorry, baby." Yunho chuckled and pulled Jaejoong back towards him, wrapping his arms tightly around the latter's tiny waist.
Jaejoong suddenly stood up from his embrace with Yunho, the sadness long forgotten from being struck by a sudden brainwave. He pulled the other up from the floor and began jumping up and down hysterically, bursting into random fits of laughter. Yunho was shocked to say the least, and it felt strange to feel shocked by Jaejoong's behaviour again. Having dealt with it for over ten years, he'd began to get used to it. It was what made Jaejoong, Jaejoong. He was special. Unique. Like no other. A child in a teenager's body. And Yunho loved him just like that. Yet it seemed that six months being away had made him feel immune to his childlike acts - especially after studying in a top university.
He felt like he'd betrayed him.
Jaejoong jumped at him again, but this time without knocking him over. They fell against the wall and he looked up at Yunho with his wide eyes, bright and forgiving, and began clapping his hands.
"Yunnie! You have to see my drawings! I drew lots of you! From my memory because you weren't here!" Jaejoong announced proudly, grabbing Yunho's hand and pulling him into his bedroom, kicking the door shut behind them with the heel of his foot. Still holding his hand, Jaejoong paraded Yunho around the room, presenting him the sketches he'd made of him.
Many people underestimated Jaejoong. Several just assumed that because the majority of his mind was related to that of a child, that he only developed skills of a child. They believed that he was only able to write to the standard of a ten-year-old, and that his drawings would resemble that of a five-year-old - coloured over the lines and unrecogniseable.
In fact, Jaejoong was an amazing artist. His walls were covered in several different sketches and paintings he'd done over the years, the ones of Yunho currently covering the rest as an obvious reminder of him, and how much he'd missed him whilst he'd been gone. There were sketches of Yunho's face, some of just his hands, a few of his full body (front and back) and some just of things that Jaejoong had said that he'd loved, like his eyes and his lips (including the mole that sat above his upper lip).
Yunho was taken aback at how many there were, guilt starting to wash over him as he saw the concentration that Jaejoong had seemed to put into them, just to get them perfect because he'd missed him.
"They're lovely, Jaejoongie."
Jaejoong smiled brightly, his arms instinctively wrapping around Yunho to make sure he didn't leave again, "I drew them because I missed you. I wanted to draw you lots of times to see if you'd come to life and hug me. But you never did. I did see people like you, but they weren't really you. They were pretend. They wanted to be you but they weren't. I can always tell when it's really you, Yunnie." And Yunho felt his chest tighten with loss of breath at Jaejoong's words.
Stepping back, Jaejoong stared at Yunho questioningly before tilting his head slightly, "But Yunho-yah, since you've been here, you haven't given me a popo." he said sadly.
Yunho chuckled and leant down, running his fingers through Jaejoong's hair again, "Would you like a popo, Joongie-yah?"
The other nodded his head enthusiastically, pursing his lips at Yunho. The latter couldn't help smiling and he leant down and captured Jaejoong's lips in a sweet kiss.
"Yunnie! You're never allowed to leave ever again! If you do, I'll die."
"Well then, trust me Joongie - you're going to live forever."
__________
not my best work - found it on my documents a couple of days ago, and edited it here and there. so here you have it. :)
and remember,
your beautiful comments always inspire me. ^^
Yunho/Jaejoong.
(pretty much mainly) Fluff, AU.
Jaejoong's mind can only process simple things, but the most complex of them all is that he knows for sure how much he is capable to love.
{i need to learn how to write summaries}
"Yunho, it's so good to see you!"
Hardly giving him time to breathe, Yunho became smothered in the embrace of a much older but much shorter lady. He smiled, giving into her strong squeeze - the one he had always joked was enough to kill a small animal, until she had insisted that she would never do something like that and to never assume it again. The memory plastered a larger grin on his face as she began to sway him side to side slowly.
"I've missed coming here too, ajumma." he admitted.
"Yah!" she squealed, slapping Yunho's arm, "None of that 'ajumma' stuff. I'm Yaejun-noona! I'm so not old enough to be an ajumma!"
He laughed, watching her face crinkle in disapproval of the referral, "But you are married Yaejun-noona!"
"Yes, well..." Yaejun said slowly, "Ah, Suhoon... I'm really starting to miss that softie..." she admitted, sniffling. Yunho reached out to place a comforting arm on her shoulder which ended up as another hug. He brushed his fingers through her shoulder-length hair as she trembled in his hold.
"Sorry, I'm being silly." Yaejun said, stepping away from Yunho - who stood shaking his head in comfort - and wiping her eyes, "It's another story. I'm sure there's a completely different reason you're here."
Looking down at his feet, Yunho nodded.
"He's missed you a lot, Yunho. I couldn't get him to calm down for three days after I told him you were going to be away for six months."
Yunho bit his lip in guilt, "I'm sorry, Yaejun-noona... I just..."
She cupped his face and shushed him, "No need to be sorry. You did what you had to do. He's been okay. Sometimes when he sees the photos of you two he gets upset, but recently, he's perked up."
Touched, Yunho smiled gently. He pressed a small kiss to Yaejun's cheek and began to look around. The parts of the house he could see hadn't changed. There was still the red staircase and the matching red carpeted hallway. The pictures of him and the one person he was dying to see hung on the walls, the only thing changed being the frames that they were locked into. The kitchen was still black and cream, the legendary blender lying atop the counter. Yunho recalled how many times he'd attempted to make a smoothie with it, using mud and milk, assuming it was a good idea.
And to his right, the white carpet of the living room was still littered in random magazines and colouring pens and pencils that Yunho assumed were his. He never did tidy up. The brown leather sofas remained in the same place they had been in when he'd left the house for the last time. The only thing that he could see different about the living room was a small drawing on the mirror of a small stick boy and a taller stick boy holding hands, one with floppy black markerpen hair and one with spikey brown felt-tip pen hair.
Yunho could imagine Yaejun staring at the picture in disbelief, deciding to praise him for it before breaking down on the inside, wondering of a million different ways of how to get it off but make sure she wasn't insulting him by removing his picture. He was always proud of his drawings. But Yunho knew he was much more talented than stick boys and girls.
"Is he out right now?" Yunho questioned, his eyes not landing on the petite charcol-headed boy that he was trying to find.
The elder lady shook her head, "I didn't tell him you were coming. I thought it'd be a better surprise if you just turned up outside his bedroom door. And you know he hates to answer the door."
Yunho nodded and grinned, unable to hold in the excitement of seeing him again for the first time in six months. He'd been the only thing on his mind whilst he'd been away studying - his brain refusing to let him think of anything other than whether he was okay, whether he was eating, whether he was behaving, whether he was missing him, whether he was taking his medicine...
Yunho looked up from his daydream, to find Yaejun in one of her own. When he clicked his fingers in front of her face, her body returned to Earth but her mind seemed to stay wherever it'd been. She smiled gently but sadly, her hands beginning to fiddle with the cross pendent attatched to the chain around her neck - and Yunho knew that that meant she was nervous.
"He's fine, right, Yaejun?" Yunho asked worriedly, his voice a couple of knotches higher and much more frantic.
She let out a small giggle and rested an hand on his arm, "Of course he is, Yunho. I'm sorry. I'm not used to having someone realise my nervous habits. He doesn't ever take into account my actions, he's always too busy with other things. The only people who'd ever notice it were you and Suhoon. And you've both been gone so long..." She covered her mouth before she began to cry again, as if she'd catch her sobs in her hand. She swallowed, calming herself and tried again.
"I'm so sorry, Yunho. I just... he's missed you. Really alot. Worse than I said. And I thought I was going to go mad. You're always the best one to calm him down when he's like that. And Suhoon is the one who keeps me sane when I feel hopeless and can't control him. I don't know what it is. We've disconnected and it makes me so mad with myself. What kind of umma does it make me, eh?" Yaejun spoke slowly, her eyes turning glossy and her cheeks flushing red. She sighed and threw her head back to pull her hair from her face.
"I'm just so glad you're back, Yunho." she said, rubbing the emotion from her face. Yunho smiled and ran a hand through her hair again.
"And Suhoon's back in two weeks, isn't he?" Yunho asked.
She nodded, "It'll be fine soon. It'll be back to normal. Everything will click into place and he'll be happy again. I can't stand to see him sad.
He just looks so dead. Like his entire life has been sucked from him."
Yunho bit his lip. It couldn't be this bad. But he began to fear what kind of state he'd find when he went upstairs.
"Look. Enough of this. You need to go to him. Now." Yaejun said, pushing Yunho towards the stairs with a perkier voice and a laugh waiting to escape, "I know you remember exactly which room. He hasn't moved. I expect you both down within the next two hours, because I'm making dinner! Go! Go now..."
Leaning down to steal a peck from her cheek, Yunho laughed as he was pushed up the stairs. He started to jog up the first flight, instantly recognising the pictures on the walls on the first floor. In a way, this felt more like home than his actual house. And he supposed that that may've been because he'd dumped his bags to come straight here.
He made climbing the second flight of stairs look easy, taking two at a time. Whatever to close the space between him and the angel that he assumed was sat, probably sketching, in his room.
Arriving outside the familiar door, he realised that the music seeping under the door and through the walls was in fact F.T. Island. A band that the other had downright refused to ever listen to, even if Yunho did like them. The chorus of I Hope flowed through the air, and a voice on the other side sang along, the melody of the music mixing beautifully with the sound of said voice.
Yunho smiled. This was it.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
"Who is it~?!" The voice sang from the other side, "Can I have some biscuits, Umma? I'm hungry~"
A beam found it's way onto Yunho's face at the other's words. He really had no idea that he was coming.
The white door opened to reveal the face that Yunho had been waiting to see for six months. And along with the house, he had not changed. His hair still perfectly framed his face even without any attempt to do so, the darkness a blatent contrast to his white and flawless skin, still looking as if he'd been carved from ivory. He was still half-a-head shorter than Yunho himself and petite. Yunho even noticed that he was wearing the same rings he wore, as well as a pair of cross earrings that Yunho himself had bought him for his birthday the year he'd gotten his ears pierced. His usual smell of apples and chocolate added onto the visual force of him and it all stunned Yunho for a few seconds before he broke into a massive smile.
"Jaejoong-ah..." Yunho breathed.
"Ah... Yunnie... is that really you?" Jaejoong asked, tilting his head to the left, "I don't want more lies. If you're a dream then tell me now because I don't like it when you visit me here. You aren't my real Yunho-yah." he whined, puffing his cheeks out and crossing his arms.
Yunho laughed a little before pouting, himself, "I promise, Joongie. It's me! I'm back!"
Hesitantly, Jaejoong unfolded his arms and let the air from his cheeks slowly, worried and excited all at the same time. Yunho watched conflicting emotions flash behind the eyes of the other, his head mixing up different concoctions of ideas, deciding whether to believe the person before him nor not.
"Are... are you really? Really? Forever? Are you back forever?!"
Nodding, Yunho smiled, "I'm back forever, Joongie."
Jaejoong squealed in delight, his face glowing and joy wracking his body. He jumped at Yunho, toppling them both backwards and out into the hallway, crashing to the floor with Jaejoong on top of him. He giggled and Yunho began to wonder why he'd ever considered leaving, even for a little while - when he could hear Jaejoong laugh every day.
"I missed you, Yunnie! Really, I did!" Jaejoong screamed, as if he said it louder then it'd make it more believable. He nestled his head into the crook of Yunho's neck, a content smile resting on his face as the latter sat up and wound his arms around him. Yunho felt him start to slacken, the hyperactive outburst slowly subsiding and a relaxed beautiful boy lying in his arms.
"I missed you too, Jaejoongie." Yunho confessed, running his fingers through his ebony locks before brushing the fringe from Jaejoong's eyes. Massive orbs looked up at him, round and glassy and Yunho began to worry. Instead of the calm and relaxed boy he'd believed he was holding, instead he was still het up and hysterical, but instead he was upset, and stressed. Yunho watched in horror as Jaejoong began to bite down harshly on his pink petals.
"Ah, Jaejoong-ah, don't do that." He said, putting his finger on the other's lips. Jaejoong only bit his lips when he was nervous, upset or excited, usually to the point where they'd bleed. Sometimes he didn't even realise that he was bleeding until he could taste it or until Yunho, Yaejun or Suhoon began fussing over him.
"It's okay, I promise. I won't leave you again." Yunho vowed, linking his fingers with the other's.
Jaejoong pouted when Yunho had managed to pull his lip from his teeth just before he pierced the skin, "I'm sorry, Yunho-yah."
"Don't be sorry, baby." Yunho chuckled and pulled Jaejoong back towards him, wrapping his arms tightly around the latter's tiny waist.
Jaejoong suddenly stood up from his embrace with Yunho, the sadness long forgotten from being struck by a sudden brainwave. He pulled the other up from the floor and began jumping up and down hysterically, bursting into random fits of laughter. Yunho was shocked to say the least, and it felt strange to feel shocked by Jaejoong's behaviour again. Having dealt with it for over ten years, he'd began to get used to it. It was what made Jaejoong, Jaejoong. He was special. Unique. Like no other. A child in a teenager's body. And Yunho loved him just like that. Yet it seemed that six months being away had made him feel immune to his childlike acts - especially after studying in a top university.
He felt like he'd betrayed him.
Jaejoong jumped at him again, but this time without knocking him over. They fell against the wall and he looked up at Yunho with his wide eyes, bright and forgiving, and began clapping his hands.
"Yunnie! You have to see my drawings! I drew lots of you! From my memory because you weren't here!" Jaejoong announced proudly, grabbing Yunho's hand and pulling him into his bedroom, kicking the door shut behind them with the heel of his foot. Still holding his hand, Jaejoong paraded Yunho around the room, presenting him the sketches he'd made of him.
Many people underestimated Jaejoong. Several just assumed that because the majority of his mind was related to that of a child, that he only developed skills of a child. They believed that he was only able to write to the standard of a ten-year-old, and that his drawings would resemble that of a five-year-old - coloured over the lines and unrecogniseable.
In fact, Jaejoong was an amazing artist. His walls were covered in several different sketches and paintings he'd done over the years, the ones of Yunho currently covering the rest as an obvious reminder of him, and how much he'd missed him whilst he'd been gone. There were sketches of Yunho's face, some of just his hands, a few of his full body (front and back) and some just of things that Jaejoong had said that he'd loved, like his eyes and his lips (including the mole that sat above his upper lip).
Yunho was taken aback at how many there were, guilt starting to wash over him as he saw the concentration that Jaejoong had seemed to put into them, just to get them perfect because he'd missed him.
"They're lovely, Jaejoongie."
Jaejoong smiled brightly, his arms instinctively wrapping around Yunho to make sure he didn't leave again, "I drew them because I missed you. I wanted to draw you lots of times to see if you'd come to life and hug me. But you never did. I did see people like you, but they weren't really you. They were pretend. They wanted to be you but they weren't. I can always tell when it's really you, Yunnie." And Yunho felt his chest tighten with loss of breath at Jaejoong's words.
Stepping back, Jaejoong stared at Yunho questioningly before tilting his head slightly, "But Yunho-yah, since you've been here, you haven't given me a popo." he said sadly.
Yunho chuckled and leant down, running his fingers through Jaejoong's hair again, "Would you like a popo, Joongie-yah?"
The other nodded his head enthusiastically, pursing his lips at Yunho. The latter couldn't help smiling and he leant down and captured Jaejoong's lips in a sweet kiss.
"Yunnie! You're never allowed to leave ever again! If you do, I'll die."
"Well then, trust me Joongie - you're going to live forever."
__________
not my best work - found it on my documents a couple of days ago, and edited it here and there. so here you have it. :)
and remember,
your beautiful comments always inspire me. ^^