I hate when I feel so shitty that I need someone to tell me that I will be okay. I don't enjoy the thought that I cannot do what I want to do with my life or that I am a failure. I am happy in this room because no one can get me and hurt me but I long to be outdoors. I think I will spend the day reading tomorrow at the Starbucks on campus. Then I ( Read more... )

My roommate injured her leg and has an old lady scooter now. Because of this, she thinks our room is too small and wanted to move into a bigger room so that she could keep the scooter in the room and not be in the way all the time. So she moved out yesterday. They told me I probably wouldn't get a new roommate so I rearranged. This was yesterday. ( Read more... )

You know in Findind Nemo, when Dori and Marlin are down in the depths of the ocean and they see a light? And Marlin comments, "I feel happy on the inside, which is a big deal for me", well I relate to this! And then when the horrible monster fish lights up the "good feeling is gone". This is my life completely described in terms of Finding Nemo.

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My roommater and I went on a run. My gosh, I am a fat-ass! Running felt awesome though. We are going to try to start going more often so that we can both get back into shape. I am hoping to get healthy again. So we are running. I realized how much I miss running like 2 weeks after my birthday when I went running away from my friends who were trying ( Read more... )

SOOOOO it is wrong if I stay in at night and don't go hang out with the friends and you bitch about how I'm never there and stuff. You plan things in from of me but never ask if i want to join in.  But if I do go and do something with the group, you are distant and moody towards me. What the fuck is the deal? If you don't want me to go with you, ( Read more... )

Life in  general is good to me right now. Things are working out. I am happy. I enjoy where I am. A while ago, I wasn't sure who I was or what I wanted and it frustrated me beyond belief. I wondered what I was suppose to be doing and any time I tried to make plans, they were royally screwed up the ass. I found that everything I had wanted and ( Read more... )

I feel like this is the only place that I can post about my weekend and not feel bad about it. I had a BLAST! I met people that are so awesome. It was great to be accepted by people who didn't know me and at least pretended to like me. It isn't like that at FSU. People aren't always nice and understanding. 
It was so hard to say good bye again. I ( Read more... )

That is pretty much it. We have fun conversations. He is almost always there now. He might be stocking me, not really. I dunno, I love talking to him though. That is all.

Anyone? I wish that life was simply. That one could simply come out and say "I want you to want me. I need you to need me. I love you to love me." But it isn't. I just finished watching Miss Potter and I have realized that I am okay with being alone but I wish that there was someone who wanted me. At times I love my life, I love my friends, my ( Read more... )

Yet again, I am lying in my bed trying to sleep and I cannot do it. I don't know why I'm so worried about school and life and everything else that I almost feel is crashing down on me. I know it is crazy because all I have to worry about is work, packing my room up, preparing for my trip to the UK, and getting time to see friends but I'm finding ( Read more... )