[speculation] glee: 2.15 "sexy", 2.16 "regionals"

[satora_chan]

SPOILERS FOR SEXY & REGIONALS FROM HEREON OUT

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2.15: SEXY

hopes&dreams:

• Santana
  
  Sam does not, in fact, suggest a threesome at any point (though if Santana suggests it, I'd totally be down for that because, honestly, she would). I want ally!Sam back (you guys realize potential!ally!Sam was written by Ian, right? the same dude who gave us BIOTA? Ian, you have so much POSSIBILITY and not enough harnessing). I want him to actually be supportive of his girlfriend instead of being boring, stereotypical horndog. ... actually, I should be scared of Artie making that comment, shouldn't I?
  
  I want a scene of where it's just the audience and Santana. They've been building up the subtlety of Santana's loneliness so fucking well this past season ever since "Duets", but the general viewer isn't so observant. I need a moment where she realizes that what she's doing - this directed cruelty, this pent-up anger, this romantic schadenfreude - is actually hurting her. Or maybe it's her Moment of Realization/Acceptance about her sexuality.
  
  I want her to confess to Brittany that she loves/likes/cares/misses her. I really, really care for you. Any of those. I want Brittany to be confused (because when is she isn't), but I want Brittany to remember the feelings of heartbreak and hurt when Santana rejected her.
  
  I don't know how I want the Artie-Brittany-Santana thing to work out. I'm actually just going to trust the writers for this; hopefully, they'll pleasantly surprise me.
  
  
• "Animal" song sequence
  
  Please, please, let this be Blaine having a wet dream. This is an episode about sex and sexuality. Jokes/ribbing at wet dreams is mandatory.
  
  Please let this be from Blaine's POV and not from Kurt's because I'm pretty sure the entire Blaine/Kurt fandom is dying over here from the oblivious!whiplash that this Blaine keeps providing. Just! A little overt acknowledgment that Blaine wants to tap that? Please.
  
  Unfortunately, since a girls' private school is supposed to show up, I feel like this isn't it (unless it's the night after ). ... also, lollll, I bet this is some sort of quarterly "DALTON BOYS GET TO CROSS PATHS WITH THE FEMALE SEX" function. Wes, please make hilarious comments.
  
  lyrics i'll be looking at for interpretation:
  Here we go again
  I kinda wanna be more than friends
  So take it easy on me
  I'm afraid you're never satisfied.
  
  And I'm afraid I wont get out alive
  No I won't sleep tonight*
  
  Oh, oh
  I want some more
  Oh, oh**
  What are you waitin' for?
  Take a bite of my heart tonight
  
  *DREAM! DREAM! or, I dunno, pre-sleep masturbation ritual, but I doubt Glee can get away with that
  **It has been suggested that Kurt sing this and the following line in a low sultry voice. I approve whole-heartedly.]
  
  
• Kurt+Burt conversation
  
  I'm saddened by the fact that the pamphlets do not appear to have come from Ms. Pillsbury-Howell's office.
  
  I'm hoping that this conversation is when Kurt finally reveals that Karofsky sexually assaulted and sexually harassed him. Because boundaries are one of the issues you talk about in Sex Ed, and I can't think of a better time to actually say something about it (because, as angry as I'll be if Karofsky's redemption arc is rushed/sucks, I'll be equally angry if the show never, ever mentions that what he did was more than just physical violence). Plus, gives us reason to have Karofsky expelled/withdrawn from school.
  
  There are two ways that I can envision this going:
  
  1. (after the hilarity of Burt springing The Talk on Kurt)
  
  Burt: "So, uh, have you... kissed a boy yet? That Blaine kid?"
  Kurt: "I," he stares, a twitch bringing his arm closer, "no, Dad, I haven't kissed anyone."
  Burt: stares at his kid. "You're not telling me something."
  Then, BAM, "Furt" choir room scene all over again.
  
  2. (after talking about boundaries. let's not forget about the "duets" conversation, people)
  
  Kurt goes silent. Burt looks at him speculatively.
  Burt: "I'm not trying to accuse you of anything, but, y'know, since Finn, you haven't tried... pushing anyone? beyond what they're comfortable with."
  Kurt: angry, hurt, vicious. "No, Dad, I haven't pushed anyone."
  
  
• Holly Holliday
  
  No lie, excited for Gwyneth Paltrow again. She was a great guest-star in "Substitute", providing a nice contrast to Schuester. Just hope that her and Schue's storyline doesn't overrun the kids'.
  
  
• Will, Emma, Carl
  
  Emma and Carl better still be happily married by the end of this episode. And have sex because I cannot stand the thought that Emma will lose her virginity to Will. Cannot stand it.

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2.16: REGIONALS

• pavarotti's probable death/"blackbird"
  
  I don't care if it's heavy-handed metaphor; I love it, and I love it a lot more than just letting Pavarotti free to symbolize Kurt's (need to) escape Dalton.
  
  Preferably, its death occurs after regionals. it - along with the fact that the warblers are probably going to lose due to the judges' homophobia - will shock kurt enough into recognizing that it's time for him to leave the safety of dalton's nest. pavarotti died in its cage without ever gaining back its wings - what does kurt want from life?
  
  the only main issue is that i'm pretty sure we'll get the "return to mckinley" announcement at the end of "sexy", not during regionals. thus, most likely, pav's death is just about kurt leaving, not about inciting/encouraging him to leave once mckinley is safe again (since karofsky is probably going to be dealt with in "sexy" if my burt+kurt conversation prediction is at all right).
  
  i am seriously going to be sobbing during "blackbird". lyrics:
  Blackbird singing in the dead of night
  Take these broken wings and learn to fly
  All your life
  You were only waiting for this moment to arise
  
  Black bird singing in the dead of night
  Take these sunken eyes and learn to see
  all your life
  you were only waiting for this moment to be free
  
  
• the winner for regionals
  
  so it's basically a given - with all the CONSERVATIVE JUDGES spoilers - that ND is going to win Regionals. But even if there weren't any conservative judges, I'd still want ND to win.
  
  Because, even though the show has completely forgotten about them, I still remember the judges' comments from last year. And despite the elaborate sets, I don't think that has changed (I think most of the elaborate sets are just fantasy, anyways). ND aren't the underdogs anymore, but compared to the Warblers? Rich, privileged Warblers who have great academics and a zero-tolerance policy and the support of the entire administration and student body behind them?
  
  It's wrong of me to think this way, I think. It's not these kids' faults that they are growing up privileged whereas ND survives in a school where teachers throw shoes at them. But they have a lot of advantages that New Directions doesn't have, even if it's never remarked upon anymore. and it's hard to forget that, for many of these kids, glee is probably their only source of happiness and relief from the hallways of McKinley.
  
  That besides, "Loser Like Me" better be a fucking amazing performance piece because just listening to it doesn't do anything for me, and though the Warblers are going to lose primarily because of homophobia, I want it such that in a fair judging, ND would still have put up a good fight, if not a better one.
  
  when they throw the slushies of confetti, I want a flash to Kurt's awed and yearning face.