Loose Ends, a tanka

[sawahthehippi]

Leaving the theater,
I feel like I'm in a film.
The music slows, so,
softly, I walk tall through the
dark halls, and look for endings.

Comments

i dig.

[alexible]

this reminds me of tenth grade, when i was a mystic and you were a rock star and we were all indie filmmakers without a story to tell. irrelevantly, i'm not sure "so, self-awarely" is a proper pivot, but it works, and these forms are just too damn confining anyway.

Re: i dig.

[sawahthehippi]

Is this better? :)
I googled about pivots. I didn't know.

Re: i dig.

[sawahthehippi]

the first line of your comment would make a lovely opening to a coming-of-age novel. :)