Hakai Senpuu (Destruction Whirlwind) : Chapter one

[saxx]

Myrriak stepped forward, onto the stone steps of the temple's front walkway. Short, thick trees lined the path, many covered with fruit. The dewy grass gleamed in the sunlight, and birds chirped softly from the trees

Comments

The Pre-text

[anonymous]

Blake,
I am excited to read on. You have laid the groundwork for a great story. One question I have though. Do your three main characters representative of three parts that make whole to achieve a central goal. For example earth, wind, and fire or Father Son and Holy Spirit or more simply bread, peanut butter, and jelly.

Payne

Me likes

[anonymous]

Hey there Big man

The story is kickin major hind-parts. I can't wait for more. I wanna see what the three of "you" can do. Also, I'm waitin for meself :P. Anyway, talk to ya later.

P.S. The crimson trail still flows. It will never cease.

Re: Me likes

[saxx]

It's The Demon Beast of the Battlefield! YEAH!

Don't worry, my brother; your entrance shall come soon enough. Actually...

click this link : http://www.eriol.org/reflection/wallpapers/sc_mitsurugi_wall1.jpg

That's the look of your character, just so you know.

Enjoy!

[anonymous]

update samn you... UPDATE!!!

nothing in particular

[anonymous]

So wht is the relation between and M and K...THey are far to cordial to be long lost lovers...brother and sister perhaps? What are their ages? EXPLAIN! EXPLAIN!

Payne

Re: nothing in particular

[saxx]

Wrong, Masta. =P They aren't long-lost lovers, no, but they're close friends with love-interest between them. And Myrriak is not quite 16 (so, still 15), while she's a little older than 15

Good stuff

[anonymous]

Greetings brother,

This tale is growing more suspenseful as I read. It's quite amazing, yet I know it will get better. I just need to be patient, I suppose. Keep up the good work.

Zakk, the Demon Beast of the Battlefield

P.S. I'm still writing my story, but so far it's not so bad. I'll let you read it sometime. LATER.