Apparently I have never seen a horse
I woke this morning with a sore on my arm, probably from falling asleep wrong. As I gaze at the light of my cellphone, I annoyingly wonder why in the world did I get up at 5:15 in the morning? Not wanting to go back to sleep because the arm wouldn't stop shrieking in pain, I got ready for school. I had some time so I read a couple short stories. As I walked out the door, a yellow post card caught my eye. It read that since I graduated from KCC, I have to give the phone number a call in order to put in my info for an alumni "yearbook".
Now, this "yearbook" isn't quite a normal "yearbook" that one would find at the end of every year chronicling your days in school of a higher learning institution. This particular one is made for those who have already graduated and, should you wish to share your achievements, bragging rights, low points, or high salaries, (pictures are a must for formal identification so we can hunt you down), you make a call to this 'prestigious, invite-only' book. It comes out every 5 to 10 years (wtf) so you're to be as happy as winning the lottery. Or not.
So out the door I go, phone pressed to ear and post card in hand. I walk the sidewalk, the sun starting to shine over the various apartment buildings in my neighborhood.
*Ring* *Ring*
I get an automated voice message that has a very... southern accent. Not to be confused, I double checked the post card address.
Virginia.
Well, I guess the people in charge of making a HAWAII-BASED "yearbook" are based conveniently in Virgina. I at least have the reassurance and knowledge that should I have any questions whatsoever, I can call any time at my leisure on HST. Surprisingly true. The post card mentions I can give a call between 5 am and 5 pm on weekdays and 5 am and 11 am on Saturdays.
Still, I find it strange. Now don't you judge me.
Now I talk to this older voice, very southern I might add, and we follow through with the talk of the book and whatever. Finally it comes down to me being offered three free magazines of my choice for a 90 day trial. Then if I like it I can subscribe for a student rate. Cool, cool. The lady is pretty nice and asks me what I'm interested in. I ask my usual: History, Anime, Literature, Mystery, Martial Arts, Soccer, Video Gaming, World, Entertainment. So I get suggestions on video games (xbox and Playstation magazines I finally choose cause the bus was on the way and had to choose fast) and my last pick. Now, I would choose entertainment or something awesome. Nooo, this lady asks me if I like horses. How it was brought up? She asks me if I like any other sports besides soccer, like horseback riding. No, no, there were no other options like 'tennis' or 'baseball', just horseback riding. Like it was the only other sport in the world next to soccer. So I reply that I've never really rode a horse, much less seen one up close and personal, more like donkeys or ponies thanks to carnival rides or that one horse during the Christmas parade pulling Cinderella carriage. Virginia-lady gasps a very Virginia-lady gasp and tells me that I SHOULD get the Horses Illustrated (what, pictures of sexy horses? I woulda thought Sports Illustrated would've sued) because, as she says, I'm a poor girl who has never seen a horse before and I was deprived of a real childhood. Yes. I am serious. I am a poor girl who has never seen a horse before.
Not like I can look it up on the internet. >_>;;
Who ate some of my spicy ahi?
Back to the story~
Aw, she's a nice lady, ain't she. So I have three magazines being mailed to me. One Xbox magazine. One Playstation magazine. One Horses Illustrated magazine.
Guess again~
Called an hour later to a younger sounding bitchy voice to switch the playboy of horse magazines to entertainment weekly. booya.
btw, Marky ate some of my spicy ahi.
Now, this "yearbook" isn't quite a normal "yearbook" that one would find at the end of every year chronicling your days in school of a higher learning institution. This particular one is made for those who have already graduated and, should you wish to share your achievements, bragging rights, low points, or high salaries, (pictures are a must for formal identification so we can hunt you down), you make a call to this 'prestigious, invite-only' book. It comes out every 5 to 10 years (wtf) so you're to be as happy as winning the lottery. Or not.
So out the door I go, phone pressed to ear and post card in hand. I walk the sidewalk, the sun starting to shine over the various apartment buildings in my neighborhood.
*Ring* *Ring*
I get an automated voice message that has a very... southern accent. Not to be confused, I double checked the post card address.
Virginia.
Well, I guess the people in charge of making a HAWAII-BASED "yearbook" are based conveniently in Virgina. I at least have the reassurance and knowledge that should I have any questions whatsoever, I can call any time at my leisure on HST. Surprisingly true. The post card mentions I can give a call between 5 am and 5 pm on weekdays and 5 am and 11 am on Saturdays.
Still, I find it strange. Now don't you judge me.
Now I talk to this older voice, very southern I might add, and we follow through with the talk of the book and whatever. Finally it comes down to me being offered three free magazines of my choice for a 90 day trial. Then if I like it I can subscribe for a student rate. Cool, cool. The lady is pretty nice and asks me what I'm interested in. I ask my usual: History, Anime, Literature, Mystery, Martial Arts, Soccer, Video Gaming, World, Entertainment. So I get suggestions on video games (xbox and Playstation magazines I finally choose cause the bus was on the way and had to choose fast) and my last pick. Now, I would choose entertainment or something awesome. Nooo, this lady asks me if I like horses. How it was brought up? She asks me if I like any other sports besides soccer, like horseback riding. No, no, there were no other options like 'tennis' or 'baseball', just horseback riding. Like it was the only other sport in the world next to soccer. So I reply that I've never really rode a horse, much less seen one up close and personal, more like donkeys or ponies thanks to carnival rides or that one horse during the Christmas parade pulling Cinderella carriage. Virginia-lady gasps a very Virginia-lady gasp and tells me that I SHOULD get the Horses Illustrated (what, pictures of sexy horses? I woulda thought Sports Illustrated would've sued) because, as she says, I'm a poor girl who has never seen a horse before and I was deprived of a real childhood. Yes. I am serious. I am a poor girl who has never seen a horse before.
Not like I can look it up on the internet. >_>;;
Who ate some of my spicy ahi?
Back to the story~
Aw, she's a nice lady, ain't she. So I have three magazines being mailed to me. One Xbox magazine. One Playstation magazine. One Horses Illustrated magazine.
Guess again~
Called an hour later to a younger sounding bitchy voice to switch the playboy of horse magazines to entertainment weekly. booya.
btw, Marky ate some of my spicy ahi.